getting worked up over nothing?

[LMD84]

ok so i am really not a confident person. at work people think i am confident but it's all fake. and this friday it's my husbands work Christmas party. i've never met any of the people he works with (he only started there about 3 months ago) and i'm scared of what they'll think of me.

i'm over weight and even though i have a new dress i'm scared shitless incase i embarrass him by being his fat wife in front of his work mates. i'm paranoid my make up will go wrong, paranoid that i won't find a bra to go with the dress (it's a seriously low halter neck one and as i have big boobs cannot go braless!!!)

plus i'm getting stressed over the fact that the guys he works with are bringing their partners and what if they're all amazingly beautiful and i'm the ugly duckling of the crowd? plus it's a sit down meal first and what if people watch me eat trying to see how much food the fat girl eats?

i'm getting my highlights done tomorow which always makes me feel good but then i'll be stressed about finding a bra. oh and to make things worse i had my eyebrows waxed (as normal) and the girl has made one shorter than the other

it's like 1/2cm shorter too . am i being stupid by getting so worried? i'm just so desperate to make a good impression and i don't want to cock anything up for my husband.

he tells me i'm worrying too much and that all the guys at his work are just like him - kinda geeky (he works for rockstar games) and that they all share the same kinda sence of humour and that i should get along with them fine. but i'm so scared of messing up

any ideas on how i can calm myself down a little?

even just venting and getting this all out has made me feel slightly better...

 

[Dice1233]

Awww, calm down! You will be fine! The best thing about nerdy/geeky guys is you can be yourself - have a sense of humor and they'll love you for life! I really think you are over-stressing yourself. Your hubbie will be right there with you to talk for you or hide behind if you get overwhelmed (that's what I make mine do, anyway!). Get your hair done, find that perfect bra, and know that you look fantastic just the way you are!!!

 

[n_c]

Just be yourself!

 

[Janice]

Be yourself and have a cocktail as soon as you arrive to help calm the nerves.

 

[shrsandra@yahoo]

Hi,

If that is your picture on your profile with your boyfriend, then you have nothing to worry about! You are beautiful. All the wives and girlfriends are probably thinking the same thing about themselve. Just go, have a good time and be yourself.

 

[User93]

Girl, dont worry, just chill, take a deep breth in and go there. Everyone feels nerveous before such parties, and honestly, stop saying you're fat, stop worring about it! Your husband loves you the way you are, isn't it what matters? I bet you gonna look gorgeous in the new dress and with highlights! It all gonna be good

I agree you look gorgeous in the avatar!

He works for Rockstar??? Can you guys send me a GTA IV??

 

[iadoremac]

I think you have answered your own question you are stressing over nothing. You need not care what other people think about you as long as your husband loves you the way you are then screw everyone else. i've seen your profile pic and i dont think you have anything to worry about.

 

[laguayaca]

Honey as long as your husband thinks youre hot hes all that matters at the end of the night! I am chubby too just wear something you feel beautiful in because that will set your mood. Just have a good time dont worry about anything youre so pretty!

 

[Beauty Mark]

You look beautiful in your icon photo. If you can't find a bra, I'd wear a cardigan over it so you can't see the kind of bra that you're wearing.

 

[LMD84]

thanks for the support guys. i've now had my highlights done and so my hair looks pretty, my eyebrows don't look so bad today because i've done a good job of filling them in and extended the shorter one to match.

on teh downside i couldn't buy a bra that fitted right and went with the dress so as Beauty Mark suggested i have bought a little gold sparkly shrug to go over the dress so i can wear my usual going out bra which makes my boobs look good and as it's a plunge bra it won't peep out from the dress.

now i'm going to practise my make up one more time seeing as it's my day off...

oh and i'll most definately be diving into the cocktails as soon as i get there!

 

[PBunnieP]

1. Just get your eyebrows drawn in a little, I'm sure no one will be THAT close to notice.

2. Get some nip tape just in case.

3. Dress yourself up like the doll you are.

4. If God forbid you can still talk yourself into the ugly duckling mode while checking youself in the mirror remind yourself that you are still your husbands hottest duckling

Good luck at the party!

 

[carandru]

You got it together already! Just be yourself and I'm sure it will all turn out alright. I wouldn't DIVE into the cocktails

but definitely having a drink up front can't hurt anything. You WILL look gorgeous and I hope you feel gorgeous too. Your hubby obviously loves you, including the way you look. And THAT is really all that matter.

So loosen up a bit and have a great time . Take some pics and post here after the party!!! I can't wait to see how gorgeous you look.

 

[LoveMU]

You are so pretty! You don't have anything to worry about, but I know everyone is their own worst critic. You will probably have a lot of fun! I love dorky guys, they are so fun and open-minded compared to other guys too, so it's easy to have a good time hanging out with them!

 

[LMD84]

thanks girls, just finished messing about with my make up and my hubby said that it was very pretty (he's usually honest and tells me if i look like a hot mess!!)

i will post piccies up after the party. just gonna be a bag of nerves until i get there on friday i guess.

 

[user79]

I don't think you have anything to worry about at all judging from your profile pic, just let your personality shine through! I'm sure you will look great. Everyone has insecurities when meeting new people. The more worked up you get about it, the more difficult you're only making it for yourself.

BTW most geeks are very accepting! Haha...they tend to be more on the shy but funny side.

 

[abbyquack]

Along with everyone else's comments, I think acting like you have confidence is key. You say that everyone thinks you are confident, and so whether or not you really are, it doesn't matter, because people believe you are. That is the most important aspect and will speak volumes over what you wear or how your makeup is done. If you act confident, people will overlook the eyebrow or whatever. Have fun and don't worry what other people think, because what does it matter anyways? Clearly you are a woman of good taste and style!

 

[lafemmenoir]

Sweetheart,
Your feelings are very normal, it's very natural to be nervous around unfamiliarity. But, the other women are going to be feeling just as nervous as you are. We all have insecurities, some people show them differently, sometimes we talk to much, talk to little, and work ourselves up. All you have to do is "try" to be yourself and not focus on you, but having a night out with your husband. He will be with you, and just smile exchange pleasantries, and when you feel comfortable make conversation with the others. Appearance, weight, hair, that's all relative, everyone worries about how others will perceive them, but really no matter what your size, if you look like you like yourself and enjoy your husband, you will be the belle of the ball. Do some meditation and visualization that this is just going to a pub to meet up with some friends of hubbies and have a drink for holiday cheer. You will be fab

 

[LMD84]

hey guys, well the party went fine. when i first got there i was really nervous but nick just introduced me to loads of people and made small talk. then one of the guys girlfriends came up to me and said how pretty my dress was and ended up chatting to her for ages - turns out she's a mac addict too!)

the meal was lovely. there were lots of different ages of people in the party and everyone seemed to get on great together. so yes i worried for nothing but thanks for the support. all your comments are so sweet and helpful.

 

[Dice1233]

Glad it all worked out!!!!!!!