I can't go...Help!

[MAC_fanatic]

OK so I've been with my boyfriend for a pretty long time now and I'm a little embarrassed to say this. When we have sex, I don't really orgasm when he goes inside me. Sometimes it feels good and sometimes it doesn't and the only time he's ever made me "go" was when he was playing with my clitoris. So my question is how can I orgasm when he's actually inside me? I've tried talking to my best friend about it and she just said it takes time until you have one, but I REALLY don't think it takes this long. So pleeeeease someone help me! I'm desperate!

 

[Mabelle]

the fact of the matter is that most women dont orgasm from vaginal stimulation alone. There just arent that many nerve endings inside the vagina compared to the clitoris. I've never had a "vaginal orgasm", but ive had many while my bf was "inside me". you or he can still show the clitoris some love while he's goin at it. Plus once you've had an orgasm or two, it makes it easy to have a g spot orgasm.So don't ignore that clitoris! Go for the gold!!

 

[iadoremac]

^^^ I agree with Mabelle and i think you should do exactly what she has said.

 

[LMD84]

yup i'm all for him or me playing with my clit while he's in me! i think i've come once or twice through vaginal stimulation and i personally prefer clitoral anyways.

 

[MAC_fanatic]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LMD84 yup i'm all for him or me playing with my clit while he's in me! i think i've come once or twice through vaginal stimulation and i personally prefer clitoral anyways.

I'm the same, I prefer clitoral too and I always thought I was weird for not just "going" when he's in me. Well that makes me feel better haha. Thanks!

 

[blindpassion]

I don't have orgasms from vaginal stimulation. A LOT of women don't. If my clitoris isn't stimulated, I won't orgasm. Find positions that make it easier for either you or your partner to work with your clitoris.

Don't feel like there is something wrong with you, this is a common issue.

 

[MAC_fanatic]

Quote:

Originally Posted by blindpassion I don't have orgasms from vaginal stimulation. A LOT of women don't. If my clitoris isn't stimulated, I won't orgasm. Find positions that make it easier for either you or your partner to work with your clitoris. Don't feel like there is something wrong with you, this is a common issue.

I don't want to get too personal so you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but do you know any good ones? Like I said, totally up to you to not answer, I know it's kind of a private issue and I'll totally understand. Thanks!

 

[blindpassion]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MAC_fanatic I don't want to get too personal so you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but do you know any good ones? Like I said, totally up to you to not answer, I know it's kind of a private issue and I'll totally understand. Thanks!

No its okay! To be honest, I don't orgasm during sex very often. It usually goes like this, we have sex - which is very good, it just doesn't make me orgasm. And then when hes finished he focuses on me (aka going down on me, etc). And that works perfectly

But look up on google some good positions for clitoral stimulation and it will give you some ideas!

 

[coquetayloca]

This makes me feel so much better also... I can't orgasm via vaginal stimulation either... Made me feel bad, but I guess we need to try something else.

 

[radarlove]

This isn't for all couples, but you might consider using a vibrator during sex. As others have mentioned, many women can't orgasm vaginally...I can't (and believe me I've tried!) I do use a vibrator during sex though, which allows me to orgasm at least once during sex and it's great! My partner likes it too, because it feels really good for him, probably my muscles are contracting and all that. I also like doing this because I feel more "in control" of my own pleasure, if that makes sense.

In order to accomplish this, we usually do it doggy style but my shoulders are kind of on the bed so my butt is in the air, haha. It also works face-to-face in this position Folded Deck Chair Sex Position (NSFW!!!!)

 

[Chikky]

I don't come with just penetration (of course, oral doesn't do it for me, and neither does a vibrator. Am I weird??)but I can with clitoral work. I do it, heh, and I do think it's better while he's in me when I do it.

Me on top, or even HIM on top, and doggies style all work and I can stimulate myself at the same time.

 

[MAC_fanatic]

Quote:

Originally Posted by blindpassion No its okay! To be honest, I don't orgasm during sex very often. It usually goes like this, we have sex - which is very good, it just doesn't make me orgasm. And then when hes finished he focuses on me (aka going down on me, etc). And that works perfectly But look up on google some good positions for clitoral stimulation and it will give you some ideas!

Yeah I'm the same, I feel bad though because sometimes I just fake it because it's not really pleasureable for me, like it feels good, but not good enough to make me go and so I just get tired of it. But I'll def. look up some on the internet, thanks a lot for your advice!

 

[Mabelle]

Don't fake it. I think it would hurt you're guy's feelings more if he found out you were faking, as oppose to not orgasming.

I think faking is the easiest way to hurt a man's pride.

 

[iio]

I know how you feel. It just takes time really. You just have to find what is right for you. I've had orgasms without my bf playing with me. And it takes me a long while! You have to find a certain position where both your pelvic areas are touching and when you two are grinding or whatever try to focus on your clitoral area. Its hard cause if he makes a certain move you can loose it quickly. Or like some of the other girls have said...just have him play with it while he is in you.

 

[rockin26]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MAC_fanatic I don't want to get too personal so you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but do you know any good ones? Like I said, totally up to you to not answer, I know it's kind of a private issue and I'll totally understand. Thanks!

Hey sweetie, don't stress as you can see you're not alone and it's a pretty common thing but probably isn't spoken about often enough.

The reason you get more enjoyment when your clit is played with is because that's where allot of your nerve endings are. Something I find that works well is definately on top. You can grind your clit into his pubic bone to give yourself stimulation, and i say grind not bounce. HTH but if not try the toys out, it's fun and healthy and can really spice up your sex life. If a vibrator is too big (and they can be awkward to incorporate when there are 2 people involved) get somthing smaller like a vibrating egg thing (i'm sure it has a proper name) it's small and thin and almost the shape of an egg and can is a great size for manuvering into the position you're in.

Good luck matey and try to have fun with it, it's an opportunity to be more adventerous

 

[Deathwish238]

Nothing wrong with a vibrator

 

[MACLovin]

Quote:

Originally Posted by radarlove In order to accomplish this, we usually do it doggy style but my shoulders are kind of on the bed so my butt is in the air, haha. It also works face-to-face in this position Folded Deck Chair Sex Position (NSFW!!!!)

OMG that site is awesome, thanks! haha

love the folded deck chair..