I hate my body

[Dark_Phoenix]

I really hate my body.

I have von Willebrand's Disease and it's type III and severe; it's alot like hemophilia, I don't have a vW clotting factor, or a factor VIII so my blood doesn't clot well. I can't do contact sports, and my mother gets paranoid when I so much as drive. When I went to play paintball last week I couldn't -- if I bruise it can cause internal bleeding so I sat inside while everyone else was out there.

Well I missed prom this Saturday and I've been upset over it.
I had my hair done, and went to Lancome for make-up. But of course something went wrong; I started having a nosebleed right as the MA's applying blush. It went all over my jeans and shirt, and after twenty minutes the bleeding wouldn't stop so I had to drive myself to the hospital (which wasn't pretty, I'm still cleaning up the blood in my car). Yeah, a nosebleed (for me) can be dangerous if it continues.

But the ER wasn't speedy, I had a transfusion, the nosebleed was treated, and I fell asleep for almost five hours. Missed prom COMPLETELY. They had tried using antifibrinolytic drugs but they didn't work at all (I think I've built up antibodies to them).

I think I need to have my medication/transfusion regimen adjusted again because this keeps happening, bleeding episodes I mean. They've adjusted my treatment regimen three times this year already and I'm just getting sick of all the guessing.

 

[dmenchi]

OMG! this is truly a challenge to have a normal life. asssuming from the text your still in High school?

 

[butterflydream]

I feel really bad for you sweetie. It's horrible that things happen to people that don't desearve them. When I was your age I used to faint all the time, and get bad bruises, and felt sore in my joints all the time. I kept seeing differant doctors all the time, but no one knew what was wrong with me. It was only recently I found out that I have SLE. I know i'ts hard to stay possitive when you feel sick, and things don't seem like they will get better but just remember that you are alive and thats what counts.

 

[n_c]

 

[hoemygosh]

oh hunny. thats horrible. i hope that things get better for you. =]
luv, apryl.

 

[Willa]

I hope things will get easier for you in the future

I can also say that I missed prom but I was there
But I lost my friends that night and got my boy stolen by this girl who camed to our prom only to cause trouble, she wasnt even at our school.
The first dance? I danced it with my cousin, he camed with my ''friend''...

I totally understand what is it to miss it

 

[MxAxC-_ATTACK]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willa I hope things will get easier for you in the future I can also say that I missed prom but I was there But I lost my friends that night and got my boy stolen by this girl who camed to our prom only to cause trouble, she wasnt even at our school. The first dance? I danced it with my cousin, he camed with my ''friend''... I totally understand what is it to miss it

wow. Same here.. I ended up spending my Prom sitting by a table, Saddest part was i didnt go to my high schools prom i went to my dates prom, which was our rival high school, So none of my friends were there girls kept walking by saying "aw hun wheres your date?" .."i dunno"


Im sorry you are going thru this. Hopefully they can find something that will treat you more efficiently in the future. Keep your head up

 

[Hilly]

Hugs Emma!

 

[Katura]

I'm keeping you in my thoughts hunny.

I really hope things get better! Remember we're all here for you!

 

[Raerae]

wow. Same here.. I ended up spending my Prom sitting by a tableQUOTE]

lol... i had a homecomming dance like that my freshman year...

 

[Dark_Phoenix]

Thanks guys.

I was going to prom with some other girls in my dorm, and looking foward to it /sigh. College next year, oh well...

Maybe I'm just not trying hard enough... like, I take all my meds, go for all my transfusions, etc.. But I keep thinking I just might not be doing enough. I've been dealing with vWD since I was about 3 or 4, and I'd hope I know how to manage it by now but the bleeding episodes are becoming more frequent.

Went to the hematologist @ 8 am. The nosebleed was from a blood vessel in the way back of my nose breaking. They found *gross warning* blood in my urine again (in addition to the last bleeding episodes) so they've increased the frequency of my factor transfusions and started me on factor VIIa.

 

[Raerae]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emma_Frost Thanks guys. I was going to prom with some other girls in my dorm, and looking foward to it /sigh. College next year, oh well... Maybe I'm just not trying hard enough... like, I take all my meds, go for all my transfusions, etc.. But I keep thinking I just might not be doing enough. I've been dealing with vWD since I was about 3 or 4, and I'd hope I know how to manage it by now but the bleeding episodes are becoming more frequent. Went to the hematologist @ 8 am. The nosebleed was from a blood vessel in the way back of my nose breaking. They found *gross warning* blood in my urine again (in addition to the last bleeding episodes) so they've increased the frequency of my factor transfusions and started me on factor VIIa.

If your in a Sorority, and greek scene does stuff like Prom, only better

 

[User49]

I dont have that , but I have something that is also very dibilatating and frustrating. So I sympathize. My only advice is to just try to get on and not let it get to you. I spend so much time frustrated because my condition lets me down and prevents me from leading 'the normal' life, and life is too short to let it get to you. I do understand how you feel though and you have my sympathy and prayers xx

 

[giz2000]

hugs to you, hun....