I just don't know what to do

[MissMarley]

My best friend moved 8 hours away. I am not a very trusting or outgoing person- I'm the type who has a couple of close friends, and not a lot of casual friends at all. My husband is the opposite- he has a ton of casual friends, and always has plans with them, and I don't even know most of them at all.

And now my best friend is gone and I don't know how to deal with it. He's the one who could get me out of the house and into social situations. And he's the only friend I actually trust enough to talk about "real" life. Obviously we still talk a lot, but it's not the same. There's no one here to hang out with on the front porch or to hug when I'm sad. I have Nate, my husband, but that's a totally different kind of relationship.

I just feel so...empty. And alone.

 

[Shimmer]

That sucks.

I don't have any advice for you, but I hope it gets better.

 

[Beauty Mark]

There's nothing to be said.. It sucks. I hope you two can manage to keep in touch.

 

[hoemygosh]

aw, thats soo horrible. hopefully you come across someone else who makes you feel the same way. i know how you feel though, i had too move away from my best friend, and we only see eachother a few times a month now. =[. it makes me really sad. because i feel like i never talk about things anymore. & thats one thing i do alot. lol. and theres no one too listen to me, who really cares, & understands. im sorry! & i hope that your best friend moves back!!. lol. =]

 

[flowerhead]

This has happened to me before, and it's horrible isn't it. You just have bonds with some people.
I don't have any advice really but to stay strong and remember how lucky you were to have such a good friend.

 

[yummy411]

i'm sorry to hear that! sounds like road trips are in order...
well miss marley, sounds like you have to get out there on your own! some how i'm always talking for hours with people at makeup counters and comparing products with the drugstore beaty aisle bums... when you put on your good face of makeup go out.. and then say "what would my bff do in this situation" i challenge you.... don't try to replace your bff, as i know that can't be done, just make casual relationships, talk and write to your bff, and you might find some more quality in your hubby that you can count on.

i know this prob can't compare, but when my older sis left for college i was devastated. i really felt the same way. who would i talk to, get clothing and makeup advice from, go out with (my sister had to drag me every where to get my parents approval for outtings)? i just cried it out, but then believed in myself that i could make it even without her around 24/7.. it took a little work, but it was okay... when i realized people like me for me, it was gravy! good luck deary... your specktra fam and blog friends are still out here when you need us

 

[MissMarley]

man...it's even harder now because he came home for a week (his sis got married) and wanted to spend a lot of time with me- so I got spoiled, got to spend my days off with him, and now he's gone again. just gone. and there's this stupid girl in nashville that wants his body bad, but he just wants to be friends- and i'm jealous! i'm so afraid she's going to just take my place in his life. he's been my best friend for years, and i don't know how to handle life without him.

 

[jenii]

That sucks, I'm sorry. My best friend lives in freakin' KANSAS, so I know how you feel.

I wish I had some advice, but I don't. It just sucks.

 

[MissMarley]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenii That sucks, I'm sorry. My best friend lives in freakin' KANSAS, so I know how you feel. I wish I had some advice, but I don't. It just sucks.

dude, so i live closer to your best friend? kansas SUCKS.

i don't think there is any advice. i think we just have to get used to a part of our soul being a million miles away. he and i have always called each other "anam cara"- friend of my soul- and that's really how we are. he tells me too that he wakes in nashville and feels like he can't find something or forgot something, and he's looking around trying to remember, and then realizes that he just has an emptiness because he misses me.

 

[Willa]

I totaly understand how you feel, 3 years ago I lost all of my friends...
I did it by myself, but I needed to. They were taking all my energy doing things I didnt want to be involved with.

I did not meet anybody close to a best friend, its hard sometimes.
You have your man, your family but its not always the persons who you want to be with.

So, I learned how to deal with myself, learned a LOT about me.
It helped me understand my life, how I was with people and also helped me find what and who I wanted in my life.

 

[blueyedlady87]

i'm so sorry. i can imagine how hard that would be! i too am not the type to have alot of friends. everyone i was friends with is moving for college and i'm alone. but i'm trying to be my own best friend. on the brightside, at least you have a hubby who's there for you.

 

[MxAxC-_ATTACK]

I feel your pain. my best friend moved to Phoenix. I only see her once maybe twice a year, after she moved another good friend of mine promptly moved and got married, the rest of my friends seemed to follow suit. I don't have any friends in town now.. NONE. and it blows. I really only hang out with my b.f , but usually he is with his friends.. (Lately anyways)
If he really is your best friend, Then you wont ever be replaced!

 

[MarniMac]

My best friend is long distance now too (I moved away two years ago from Oregon to California) and we talk on yahoo messenger every day, which helps. The best advice I can give is to hang out with your husbands friends (just so you can have some social time) every once in a while, and maybe you will meet a prospective new close friend. You might not feel like you could be close to anyone else, but give it a try! You might end up pleasantly surprised! Good luck!!