Rings....Are they really that big of a deal?

[MAC_Pixie04]

So, my birthday's coming up in about 3 weeks, and my boyfriend is getting me a ring. Nothing special, no diamonds or fireworks. It's just a little silver heart-shaped ring. So why is that a big deal to people? Are rings that serious? Does a ring from a guy automatically equal a promise ring? I know this isn't a promise ring or engagement ring; we're not even CLOSE to talking about any of that. But my friends and peers are looking at this ring as a really big deal. Is it weird that I'm not? I just think it's a pretty ring. And the ring is from the same collection as the necklace he gave me for christmas, so it matches. Like a set. And my two closest friends are going through awkward phases as far as lovelives: one is newly single and the other hasn't been able to find a dateable man in over three years. So they're viewing my gift as a big deal, but I'm getting negative vibes about it. When I went to try it on (he wanted me to try it on before he ordered one), they didn't even wanna be near me...I'm sure it was mild jealousy, because I wasn't being obnoxious with it...

What's the big deal with rings? or jewelry in general actually...why do they drive girls bonkers?!

 

[mzcelaneous]

Eh, unless he proposed or "made a promise" to you, I don't see the big deal with it either. A ring for your birthday, anniversary, etc would be like any other gift except that it's in the form of jewelery. Maybe your gal pals are a teensy bit jealous?

 

[Beauty Mark]

Some people having something to show off and equate the amount you spend or the flashiness of the ring to mean true love. Because a man normally doesn't give a woman jewelry, due to the price, it can be a symbol of a serious relationship.

 

[..kels*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beauty Mark Because a man normally doesn't give a woman jewelry, due to the price, it can be a symbol of a serious relationship.

i agree. it definitely means he cares about you & knows the relationship is serious. & i think every guy is aware of the seriousness that a girl will place on the whole "getting a ring" situation. sadly, i'm one of those girls who thinks a ring means SO much more than it probably actually does. lol.
happy early birthday by the way! post pictures once you get the ring!

 

[Beachgrl07]

I don't think rings are a big deal (and I'm married!!).

My dh and I hardly wear ours: He can't wear his because he works on helicopters all day and there's a nasty something that can happen if you leave your ring on while working on the helos called "degloveing." Trust me, you don't even want to ask!

Anyways, I don't wear mine because I lost 30lbs and they no longer fit and I'm too chicken s**t to take them to get resized because I'm worried someone would pull a switcheroo with my diamonds. A lot of our friends gawk and go nuts like our marriage is on the rocks because we don't wear our "tokens of love."

I just see it as I got a piece of paper that tells me I'm married so what do we need rings for anyways?

 

[MAC_Pixie04]

Yeah i think they are a little jealous. He wanted to get me the ring cuz he knew I wanted it. (it's my screensaver lmao) I don't equate the money spent on how much he cares, but sometimes he does. He's spent a lot of money on gifts for me and I think it makes him feel a little Hot Shot knowing it. But I do know for a fact that he truly loves me and cares about me, whether he gives me a ring or an ugly sweater. I just don't get why people are so OMG OMG A RING! lol i probably will stop wearing it too after awhile for fear i'd lose it. but i haven't taken off the necklace he gave me since i got it, except to clean it once a week to keep it bright.

 

[redambition]

schmeh. rings mean very little to me. some people place a lot of importance on them, but i don't. for thiss reason, i never get jewellery.. i never hassle for it.

 

[Deirdre]

Unless it's a wedding ring (and I wear mine every day), then it's a token of his love and esteem, just like the necklace. It's special because he's giving it to you, not because it is a ring.

People just like drama. It's like when you're late, and everyone gets all baby-eyed. Ugh.

 

[ginger9]

Awww, how sweet of your bf to get you a ring AND a matching one to go with the necklace too

You just made my night

I don't think it's a big deal, it's just a really sweet gesture. If your friends gave "negative vibes" then I think they were envious. But I hope you don't get too upset by that. I think it's hard sometimes to watch people in love when you aren't. It's not that your friends aren't happy for you or they aren't good friends.

Anyway, re rings. I don't think they are a big deal but my mum never got an engagement ring and at the time she didn't think it was a big deal but now she tells me she wish she said yes to the engagement ring now. It's not so much the material possession itself but I think it's kind of like a rite of passage. Anyway, she tells me if my future fiancee wants to buy me an engagement ring I shouldn't turn it down

 

[jenii]

Honestly, I have no idea. To me, jewelry is jewelry. If I like it, I get it. If a guy gets it FOR me, so much the better since it saves me money.

I never understood why rings were such a huge deal. The only time the ring should have any real significance is if the person giving it ATTACHES that significance.

 

[user79]

My man and I have rings that we got together. It wasn't a promise ring or anything, it just meant something special to us, a token of our love. But in the end it's still jewelry.

 

[MAC_Pixie04]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ginger9 Awww, how sweet of your bf to get you a ring AND a matching one to go with the necklace too You just made my night I don't think it's a big deal, it's just a really sweet gesture. If your friends gave "negative vibes" then I think they were envious. But I hope you don't get too upset by that. I think it's hard sometimes to watch people in love when you aren't. It's not that your friends aren't happy for you or they aren't good friends. Anyway, re rings. I don't think they are a big deal but my mum never got an engagement ring and at the time she didn't think it was a big deal but now she tells me she wish she said yes to the engagement ring now. It's not so much the material possession itself but I think it's kind of like a rite of passage. Anyway, she tells me if my future fiancee wants to buy me an engagement ring I shouldn't turn it down

Yeah cuz I watched for 19 years while people around me were disgustingly in love. In my circle of friends, I was always the single one, so if there were an odd number of people going out, I always got invited just to make things even. Now that i'm with someone, they dont have their single airbag friend anymore, and I think they're resentful that I'm no longer floating around to be the person they spew relationship issues with...cuz i dont care lol and to be honest I never did lmao most of the time I'd just put the phone down and occasionally pick it up and say "ohhhh i seeee..." lol that probably makes me a shitty friend

 

[ginger9]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MAC_Pixie04 Yeah cuz I watched for 19 years while people around me were disgustingly in love. In my circle of friends, I was always the single one, so if there were an odd number of people going out, I always got invited just to make things even. Now that i'm with someone, they dont have their single airbag friend anymore, and I think they're resentful that I'm no longer floating around to be the person they spew relationship issues with...cuz i dont care lol and to be honest I never did lmao most of the time I'd just put the phone down and occasionally pick it up and say "ohhhh i seeee..." lol that probably makes me a shitty friend

No, not a shitty friend at all

I know exactly what you went thru. I am in that boat now - had a long distance relationship that I ended about two years ago, now I'm solo. I know many married folk and a lot of them all have the same ol' story and for some reason like to tell me all about it...sometimes I can't help but zone out :roll:

But it's good to hear that the tables have turned and it sounds like you have a great relationship going with your bf right now...isn't karma cool?!

 

[MAC_Pixie04]

haha yeah. cuz now all those girls i was friends with who were convinced that they were with "the one" are now breaking up left and right...which is sad...but i mean, who stays with their middle school sweetheart nowadays? it's so storybook.

 

[saniyairshad]

Rings mean a lot to me, it kinda takes the relationship to the next stage...I think a ring symbolizes a guy saying that he doesnt want anyone else to think ur single, ur taken

I love that feeling. I don't feel it's being possessive. I think it's a sweet gesture

 

[miss holly j]

I think a ring is just a ring until you guys make it more until then it's like getting a necklace or bracelet.

 

[kaliraksha]

Ring is a piece of metal. It doesn't have to mean anything but it can mean the world- but so can.... a purse? He can say "this is our promise purse!" I think a guy buys a girl a piece of jewelry because he wants her to think of him or them whenever she wears it, puts it on, takes it off, plays with it, stares at it, etc.

Beyond jealousy though, maybe your friends are just bored and dramatic.