Self Image Issues???
- Thread starter Kels823
- Start date
farra712
Well-known member
I feel like this too, sometimes. I will even bring my camera cause I feel like I might actually be able to capture a picture of me looking as cute as all my friends, and then I end up erasing all or most of the pictures when I get home because I decide that I am just not cute enough and I wouldn't want to remember myself as being not as cute as my friends. My friends all have their own insecurities, but I sometimes just feel out of place. I do think that when I get health insurance I will see a psychologist about trying to have a better relationship with my body and myself. I think if it starts to interfere with life (which it seems like it might be doing to you) then you might see if you can talk to a professional as shimmer said. It might be something that can be helped.
Wattage
Well-known member
I think your experience is fairly universal - though this may be hard for you to believe, it is true. We all go through times when we feel bad about the way we look.
To set your mind at ease, I spend over 20 minutes on my makeup almost every day - I wake up early just to do it. I also spend up to 45 minutes on my hair before going out for special occasions, and at least 10 minutes on most other days of the week. Really, it can take me up to 2 hours to look great.
Just out of curiousity, I was wondering how old you are... I know that I felt very self-conscious about my appearance until my early 20s. Is it something particular that bothers you, a certain feature?
My true feeling, and knowledge from experiencing life, is that physical beauty is skin deep. I know it's cliche, but I feel that you "think" you're not attractive because you feel that way on the inside. When someone feels good about the person they are, it shines through and they are beautiful to everyone. Why compare yourself to your friends? It's comparing apples to oranges - different genes, different upbringing... there are no parallels. What you should be comparing yourself to is yourself - what you are and what you COULD be. Comparing yourself to others is completely self defeating; how can you win?
I understand your feelings, trust me. But I feel that for some reason you are deflecting more serious issues. Why are you so pre-occupied about your appearance? What's really going on? Can you talk to your friends? If not, perhaps it's time to cut those ties...
In a nutshell, you really need to examine why you are being so self critical. I imagine you are young, and if so, know that you are spending the most beautiful years of your life hating the way you look. When you are 50 or 60 you will look back with much more wisdom and wonder why oh why did I bring myself down so much?
Life is not about looking "cute", it's about accepting yourself, your short comings and working with what you have. When you can do these things, you just might be amazed at what you can be - and how beautiful you really are.
Hang in there...
To set your mind at ease, I spend over 20 minutes on my makeup almost every day - I wake up early just to do it. I also spend up to 45 minutes on my hair before going out for special occasions, and at least 10 minutes on most other days of the week. Really, it can take me up to 2 hours to look great.
Just out of curiousity, I was wondering how old you are... I know that I felt very self-conscious about my appearance until my early 20s. Is it something particular that bothers you, a certain feature?
My true feeling, and knowledge from experiencing life, is that physical beauty is skin deep. I know it's cliche, but I feel that you "think" you're not attractive because you feel that way on the inside. When someone feels good about the person they are, it shines through and they are beautiful to everyone. Why compare yourself to your friends? It's comparing apples to oranges - different genes, different upbringing... there are no parallels. What you should be comparing yourself to is yourself - what you are and what you COULD be. Comparing yourself to others is completely self defeating; how can you win?
I understand your feelings, trust me. But I feel that for some reason you are deflecting more serious issues. Why are you so pre-occupied about your appearance? What's really going on? Can you talk to your friends? If not, perhaps it's time to cut those ties...
In a nutshell, you really need to examine why you are being so self critical. I imagine you are young, and if so, know that you are spending the most beautiful years of your life hating the way you look. When you are 50 or 60 you will look back with much more wisdom and wonder why oh why did I bring myself down so much?
Life is not about looking "cute", it's about accepting yourself, your short comings and working with what you have. When you can do these things, you just might be amazed at what you can be - and how beautiful you really are.
Hang in there...
Tyester
Well-known member
Everytime I look in the mirror, I don't see my accomplishments.
All I see is a need for more, to be better, bigger, stronger, more defined, to bring this or that up, wondering why my bones have structered themselves so and why they couldn't have been better suited for more.
It's just something people have inside. And it's just one of the ends of the spectrum.
All I see is a need for more, to be better, bigger, stronger, more defined, to bring this or that up, wondering why my bones have structered themselves so and why they couldn't have been better suited for more.
It's just something people have inside. And it's just one of the ends of the spectrum.
Jennifer Mcfly
Well-known member
Quote:
Right on Wattage, what you said is my mantra! I totally agree with this.
I posted a thread somehwhat similar a while ago about weight perception as individuals. Everyone feels the way you do at some point. So just know you are not alone in feeling the way you do.
http://www.specktra.net/showthread.php?t=47814
| Originally Posted by wattage Life is not about looking "cute", it's about accepting yourself, your short comings and working with what you have. When you can do these things, you just might be amazed at what you can be - and how beautiful you really are. |
Right on Wattage, what you said is my mantra! I totally agree with this.
I posted a thread somehwhat similar a while ago about weight perception as individuals. Everyone feels the way you do at some point. So just know you are not alone in feeling the way you do.
http://www.specktra.net/showthread.php?t=47814
mzcelaneous
Well-known member
Quote:
I cannot agree more.
I used to have major self-esteem/self-worth issues. I hated everything about myself -- my physical appearance, my personality, my family, and my friends. I used to pick at every little thing that I thought people would notice (the little hairs on my nose, my thunder thighs, or deformed-looking pinky toes). It was so bad, I became a self-mutilator (thus, my love for piercings & tattoos). But at one point, I had some sort of revelation...maybe it was after having my daughter or just taking the time to re-evaluate my life. Whatever it was, it taught me acceptance. What wattage said "life isn't about looking cute", I agree 100% (and some!). Realize that the media isn't all that it's hyped up to be, realize that your friends may even feel the same way you do, realize that we are all different and different does NOT mean bad. Maybe you still need some time to get to know yourself better & understand yourself.
Once you overcome this hurdle in life (and you will
), you too will appreciate your self-worth. Just hang in there *hugs*
| Originally Posted by wattage I think your experience is fairly universal - though this may be hard for you to believe, it is true. We all go through times when we feel bad about the way we look. Life is not about looking "cute", it's about accepting yourself, your short comings and working with what you have. When you can do these things, you just might be amazed at what you can be - and how beautiful you really are. |
I cannot agree more.
I used to have major self-esteem/self-worth issues. I hated everything about myself -- my physical appearance, my personality, my family, and my friends. I used to pick at every little thing that I thought people would notice (the little hairs on my nose, my thunder thighs, or deformed-looking pinky toes). It was so bad, I became a self-mutilator (thus, my love for piercings & tattoos). But at one point, I had some sort of revelation...maybe it was after having my daughter or just taking the time to re-evaluate my life. Whatever it was, it taught me acceptance. What wattage said "life isn't about looking cute", I agree 100% (and some!). Realize that the media isn't all that it's hyped up to be, realize that your friends may even feel the same way you do, realize that we are all different and different does NOT mean bad. Maybe you still need some time to get to know yourself better & understand yourself.
Once you overcome this hurdle in life (and you will
cno64
Well-known member
You didn't say how old you are, but my guess is that you're very young.
Well, take it from an old lady of 42:
YOU LOOK BETTER THAN YOU THINK YOU DO! REALLY! I PROMISE!
If those friends with whom you compare yourself are giving and supportive, great. If they're saying and doing things to try to make you feel "inferior,' I recommend distancing yourself from them.
I say this because, when I was in my late teens/early 20s, I felt just awful about the way I looked. I'd get ready to go out, taking excrutiating pains with my clothes, hair, and makeup(Sound familiar?). Sometimes, I'd actually like what I saw in the mirror and think, "Surely, tonight nobody will say anything snide!"
But of course, I'd hear, "Well, C, you tried!" or, "C, I hope you're still on your diet!"( I was a friggin' size 9!).
Now I look at photos that were taken back then and realize that I was the prettiest one in the group, and the others were probably feeling threatened. I could just kick myself for all that time I spent crawling around apologizing for my looks instead of having a good time!
So take an honest look at YOU, and if you think you look good, you DO!
Well, take it from an old lady of 42:
YOU LOOK BETTER THAN YOU THINK YOU DO! REALLY! I PROMISE!
If those friends with whom you compare yourself are giving and supportive, great. If they're saying and doing things to try to make you feel "inferior,' I recommend distancing yourself from them.
I say this because, when I was in my late teens/early 20s, I felt just awful about the way I looked. I'd get ready to go out, taking excrutiating pains with my clothes, hair, and makeup(Sound familiar?). Sometimes, I'd actually like what I saw in the mirror and think, "Surely, tonight nobody will say anything snide!"
But of course, I'd hear, "Well, C, you tried!" or, "C, I hope you're still on your diet!"( I was a friggin' size 9!).
Now I look at photos that were taken back then and realize that I was the prettiest one in the group, and the others were probably feeling threatened. I could just kick myself for all that time I spent crawling around apologizing for my looks instead of having a good time!
So take an honest look at YOU, and if you think you look good, you DO!
Shavwi
Well-known member
I felt like that for years
I'd suggest speaking to a phsychologist about it - it has helped me immensly. After years of feeling awful about myself I finally came to the realization that you just have to accept yourself and realize that everyone feels bad about themselves sometimes. It is a reachable goal, you just have to work at it
cno64
Well-known member
Quote:
What she said! When I was in high school (I graduated in '82), I got jeered at for having "fat lips."
Now that full lips are "in," women pay big money for collagen injections,etc. in an effort to make their lips look MORE LIKE MINE!
And I also got teased about my round behind. Thank you, J-Lo, for making it "okay" to have curves!
My point is, your looks change, times change, and the very aspects you hate about your looks today may be the things you learn to appreciate most tomorrow.
It's hard, I know, but try to think of yourself as you would a dear friend. You wouldn't pick a dear friend apart, and fixate on her "flaws," I'm sure. You'd think, "Friend just looks like Friend, and to me that makes her beautiful, with her own special style."
You've got your own special style, too, so, as they say, work it!
| Originally Posted by wattage I think your experience is fairly universal - though this may be hard for you to believe, it is true. We all go through times when we feel bad about the way we look. To set your mind at ease, I spend over 20 minutes on my makeup almost every day - I wake up early just to do it. I also spend up to 45 minutes on my hair before going out for special occasions, and at least 10 minutes on most other days of the week. Really, it can take me up to 2 hours to look great. Just out of curiousity, I was wondering how old you are... I know that I felt very self-conscious about my appearance until my early 20s. Is it something particular that bothers you, a certain feature? My true feeling, and knowledge from experiencing life, is that physical beauty is skin deep. I know it's cliche, but I feel that you "think" you're not attractive because you feel that way on the inside. When someone feels good about the person they are, it shines through and they are beautiful to everyone. Why compare yourself to your friends? It's comparing apples to oranges - different genes, different upbringing... there are no parallels. What you should be comparing yourself to is yourself - what you are and what you COULD be. Comparing yourself to others is completely self defeating; how can you win? I understand your feelings, trust me. But I feel that for some reason you are deflecting more serious issues. Why are you so pre-occupied about your appearance? What's really going on? Can you talk to your friends? If not, perhaps it's time to cut those ties... In a nutshell, you really need to examine why you are being so self critical. I imagine you are young, and if so, know that you are spending the most beautiful years of your life hating the way you look. When you are 50 or 60 you will look back with much more wisdom and wonder why oh why did I bring myself down so much? Life is not about looking "cute", it's about accepting yourself, your short comings and working with what you have. When you can do these things, you just might be amazed at what you can be - and how beautiful you really are. Hang in there... |
What she said! When I was in high school (I graduated in '82), I got jeered at for having "fat lips."
Now that full lips are "in," women pay big money for collagen injections,etc. in an effort to make their lips look MORE LIKE MINE!
And I also got teased about my round behind. Thank you, J-Lo, for making it "okay" to have curves!
My point is, your looks change, times change, and the very aspects you hate about your looks today may be the things you learn to appreciate most tomorrow.
It's hard, I know, but try to think of yourself as you would a dear friend. You wouldn't pick a dear friend apart, and fixate on her "flaws," I'm sure. You'd think, "Friend just looks like Friend, and to me that makes her beautiful, with her own special style."
You've got your own special style, too, so, as they say, work it!
Wattage
Well-known member
Quote:
I could not agree more. Honestly, I used to feel so crappy about myself because people told me I was ugly. A few years ago, my boyfriend (still my boyfriend now) said to me "You know they treat you like that 'cause they're jealous..." I was like "HUH!?" He goes " Think about it - you're really smart and you're hot!" It's funny because I never thought of myself that way... now I see it all the time. It's amazing what horrible things you will think about yourself because someone picks on you for it. For example, people used to make fun of me for being tall and skinny. So, I always hated that about myself... now I embrace it. I am proud to be tall and proud to be athletic.
Seriously, you gotta watch out for "Frenemies"... they will be the end of your self-esteem if you let them!!
| Originally Posted by cno64 Now I look at photos that were taken back then and realize that I was the prettiest one in the group, and the others were probably feeling threatened. I could just kick myself for all that time I spent crawling around apologizing for my looks instead of having a good time! So take an honest look at YOU, and if you think you look good, you DO! |
I could not agree more. Honestly, I used to feel so crappy about myself because people told me I was ugly. A few years ago, my boyfriend (still my boyfriend now) said to me "You know they treat you like that 'cause they're jealous..." I was like "HUH!?" He goes " Think about it - you're really smart and you're hot!" It's funny because I never thought of myself that way... now I see it all the time. It's amazing what horrible things you will think about yourself because someone picks on you for it. For example, people used to make fun of me for being tall and skinny. So, I always hated that about myself... now I embrace it. I am proud to be tall and proud to be athletic.
Seriously, you gotta watch out for "Frenemies"... they will be the end of your self-esteem if you let them!!
user6
Well-known member
Potentially long story
Ok, so, I just want to share this with you because you and I are the same age, and I don't think anyone our age should feel the way you are feeling.....and you know what? I've been there, just a quick history...
I am half mexican, half korean, I don't know my korean family at all, grew up with the mexican side. Well, my mexican family is from Spanish descendants, and so they're all pretty tall, light skinned, blue or green eyes, light colored hair, just pretty much beautiful people.....and I, well, I'm short, yellow skinned (asian), and well, just not like my family, and growing up I always felt inferior, because my eyes are brown, and slanted, I have freckles, my lips aren't as nicely shaped as everyone else's, my hair is thick, I listen to rock/alternative (considered white people music by my family), and I just couldn't seem to do anything right in their eyes....so that became my perception of myself as well.
I hated myself for being so ugly, I buried myself in books to get away from my thoughts....I wasn't allowed to wear makeup, go out, phone calls, or stay after school....nothing!!
So I hated myself even more, for having such a shiny face, and small eyes, and fat hairy legs, and being so freakin' short! By the time I joined the Army, it was pretty much me feeling inferior again, all the 'popular' female soldiers were taller females with blonde hair, blue eyes, and well, pretty much the barbie looking ones, and I, well I didn't fit that description....so I became depressed, insomniac, and just, stressed, for reasons that I was making up myself!
Because I thought I was so ugly, because I felt I couldn't do anything right, because I felt so out of place! So finally one day I woke up and said to myself,'No More!'
I was tired of feeling horrible, I wanted to show everyone what they were passing up! So instead of focusing on my features that I thought were ugly or fat, I began to look for things that I liked about myself, like since I'm short, I can wear heels and be sexy, and not taller than my date, I can fix my small eyes by wearing eyeliner and making them look more open, i began styling my hair, but these are all superficial things, I think that most importantly, I began to live a healthy lifestyle, you know, exercising, eating right, and 3 meals a day(not starving myself like usual), and after a while, I began to lose weight, and feel confidence....not only that, running, I could think about whatever I want when I'm running, and sort things out in my head, then when I'm done, there's that feeling of accomplishment, and it's just so great to know that you're doing something healthy.
I began to glow (not with confidence) but with love, for myself. I came to accept that although I'm not the most beautiful person, I am the most beautiful person that I can be, and I love myself for that.
You need to look in the mirror like I did, and say, 'I'm young....I'm healthy....I'm smart....I'm beautiful, and I FEEL GOOD!!! You need to grab that self pity, worthlessness, and negative energy, pull it out, and kick it to the curb! You don't need it anymore, ask your family and friends to encourage and support you, and anyone who doesn't, or who puts you down is just jealous! and you don't need them! Find yourself, and you will love yourself.
Just a final thought, you know it wasn't until I began to believe in myself, and feel beautiful that I realized, not only did other people begin to see me as I saw myself, but other people always thought that I was beautiful, I was just too blind and busy feeling sorry for myself to see it.....open your eyes sweetie, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, now embrace it, and love yourself!
I hope this helps, just remember you're not alone!
I am half mexican, half korean, I don't know my korean family at all, grew up with the mexican side. Well, my mexican family is from Spanish descendants, and so they're all pretty tall, light skinned, blue or green eyes, light colored hair, just pretty much beautiful people.....and I, well, I'm short, yellow skinned (asian), and well, just not like my family, and growing up I always felt inferior, because my eyes are brown, and slanted, I have freckles, my lips aren't as nicely shaped as everyone else's, my hair is thick, I listen to rock/alternative (considered white people music by my family), and I just couldn't seem to do anything right in their eyes....so that became my perception of myself as well.
I hated myself for being so ugly, I buried myself in books to get away from my thoughts....I wasn't allowed to wear makeup, go out, phone calls, or stay after school....nothing!!
So I hated myself even more, for having such a shiny face, and small eyes, and fat hairy legs, and being so freakin' short! By the time I joined the Army, it was pretty much me feeling inferior again, all the 'popular' female soldiers were taller females with blonde hair, blue eyes, and well, pretty much the barbie looking ones, and I, well I didn't fit that description....so I became depressed, insomniac, and just, stressed, for reasons that I was making up myself!
Because I thought I was so ugly, because I felt I couldn't do anything right, because I felt so out of place! So finally one day I woke up and said to myself,'No More!'
I was tired of feeling horrible, I wanted to show everyone what they were passing up! So instead of focusing on my features that I thought were ugly or fat, I began to look for things that I liked about myself, like since I'm short, I can wear heels and be sexy, and not taller than my date, I can fix my small eyes by wearing eyeliner and making them look more open, i began styling my hair, but these are all superficial things, I think that most importantly, I began to live a healthy lifestyle, you know, exercising, eating right, and 3 meals a day(not starving myself like usual), and after a while, I began to lose weight, and feel confidence....not only that, running, I could think about whatever I want when I'm running, and sort things out in my head, then when I'm done, there's that feeling of accomplishment, and it's just so great to know that you're doing something healthy.
I began to glow (not with confidence) but with love, for myself. I came to accept that although I'm not the most beautiful person, I am the most beautiful person that I can be, and I love myself for that.
You need to look in the mirror like I did, and say, 'I'm young....I'm healthy....I'm smart....I'm beautiful, and I FEEL GOOD!!! You need to grab that self pity, worthlessness, and negative energy, pull it out, and kick it to the curb! You don't need it anymore, ask your family and friends to encourage and support you, and anyone who doesn't, or who puts you down is just jealous! and you don't need them! Find yourself, and you will love yourself.
Just a final thought, you know it wasn't until I began to believe in myself, and feel beautiful that I realized, not only did other people begin to see me as I saw myself, but other people always thought that I was beautiful, I was just too blind and busy feeling sorry for myself to see it.....open your eyes sweetie, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, now embrace it, and love yourself!
I hope this helps, just remember you're not alone!
oulala
Well-known member
I felt this way until I left high school and dumped the loser BF who made me feel like I always needed to change, and wasn't good enough. I battled an eating disorder for years and one day I woke up and said, Enough!
Strangely enough, it all changed one summer, and I can't really pinpoint why. I think it was a lot of different factors.
For one thing, I turned off the TV (never really been into it) and stopped wasting money on magazines. People are constantly venting why they think someone else is doing something wrong or looking the wrong way, ALL over the media, and when I was out with friends. I guess I managed to take a step back and think about things objectively. Exactly why would this person's opinion matter to me? Who's opinion is more important (to me) than my own? And what is it that I find beautiful, really?
I can appreciate physical beauty more than I ever have in my life... probably because I don't feel threatened by it anymore in others and can see it in myself. I don't associate with people who talk trash about others. Usually they have their own issues.
There is beauty in you. You might have to do some real soul searching and think about what is beautiful to YOU, but if you try, you will find it. And some people just aren't photogenic (myself included >_<). Don't beat yourself up over it if you're one of us unlucky ones!
Strangely enough, it all changed one summer, and I can't really pinpoint why. I think it was a lot of different factors.
For one thing, I turned off the TV (never really been into it) and stopped wasting money on magazines. People are constantly venting why they think someone else is doing something wrong or looking the wrong way, ALL over the media, and when I was out with friends. I guess I managed to take a step back and think about things objectively. Exactly why would this person's opinion matter to me? Who's opinion is more important (to me) than my own? And what is it that I find beautiful, really?
I can appreciate physical beauty more than I ever have in my life... probably because I don't feel threatened by it anymore in others and can see it in myself. I don't associate with people who talk trash about others. Usually they have their own issues.
There is beauty in you. You might have to do some real soul searching and think about what is beautiful to YOU, but if you try, you will find it. And some people just aren't photogenic (myself included >_<). Don't beat yourself up over it if you're one of us unlucky ones!
oulala
Well-known member
Quote:
Too funny! I can relate. I HATED my wavy hair and destroyed it by frying it straight. I'd spend an hour a day on it because it was so thick. Now it's one of my favourite attributes.
| Originally Posted by cno64 What she said! When I was in high school (I graduated in '82), I got jeered at for having "fat lips." Now that full lips are "in," women pay big money for collagen injections,etc. in an effort to make their lips look MORE LIKE MINE! And I also got teased about my round behind. Thank you, J-Lo, for making it "okay" to have curves! My point is, your looks change, times change, and the very aspects you hate about your looks today may be the things you learn to appreciate most tomorrow. It's hard, I know, but try to think of yourself as you would a dear friend. You wouldn't pick a dear friend apart, and fixate on her "flaws," I'm sure. You'd think, "Friend just looks like Friend, and to me that makes her beautiful, with her own special style." You've got your own special style, too, so, as they say, work it! |
Too funny! I can relate. I HATED my wavy hair and destroyed it by frying it straight. I'd spend an hour a day on it because it was so thick. Now it's one of my favourite attributes.
maxcat
Well-known member
Quote:
Been there... really, talk about this with your therapist b/c being OCD myself (recovering anorexic) the planning thing you do and then feeling horrible anyway triggered something very familiar with me... but honey DO NOT beat yourself up b/c as you can see by the number of fellow specktraette posts insecurity about how you look is actually pretty normal.
Honestly, what worked for me on top of seeing a really great therapist was going back to school. It's not that you're superficial as a person - but you need to spend some time nurturing the inner you. The great thing about post secondary school that it isn't high school and we all choose to be there - and you meet people with similar interests because of what you signed up for. And it doesn't have to be economics or political science - are you good at art? Decent cook? Sign up for an art course. Learn how to change the oil on a car. Learn about sushi. Soul search what you're good at and what you'd like to be good at it and follow up on it. And just to echo previous advice - get up and go to bed at the same time. Avoid alcohol like the plague b/c it's a depressant. Eat three squares. Get 20 minutes of exercise every day. Your body won't take care of your brain if your brain doesn't care about your body.
| Originally Posted by Kels823 (Please move this if its in the wrong thread, I apologize.) Okay so I know I have self image issues. I dont like the way I look, I over analyze every flaw, etc.... When I go out on the weekends (wherever: dinner, dancing), I put forth extra effort to look nice so I wont worry about how I look. Ill spend 20+ minutes (which is ALOT imho) on my makeup, 20 on my hair and Ill pre-plan the outfit plus 3 backup outfits. In a nutshell, I try my best to feel pretty. But when I get there...... or when I meet up with my friends (who are all ghorjus, they should all be models or something like it), I get immediately depressed. Ive learned how to hide it well but I really want to just go home and give up. Cuz no matter how hard I try to look cute, I never measure up to them. And its not like Im a shallow or superficial person. But you know how you like to look nice too? Well thats my issue. Now I am borderline manic depressive, and have a few more issues. But does neone else go thru this or is it just me?? And if you have had this issue before, how have you overcome it? TIA.... 
|
Been there... really, talk about this with your therapist b/c being OCD myself (recovering anorexic) the planning thing you do and then feeling horrible anyway triggered something very familiar with me... but honey DO NOT beat yourself up b/c as you can see by the number of fellow specktraette posts insecurity about how you look is actually pretty normal.
Honestly, what worked for me on top of seeing a really great therapist was going back to school. It's not that you're superficial as a person - but you need to spend some time nurturing the inner you. The great thing about post secondary school that it isn't high school and we all choose to be there - and you meet people with similar interests because of what you signed up for. And it doesn't have to be economics or political science - are you good at art? Decent cook? Sign up for an art course. Learn how to change the oil on a car. Learn about sushi. Soul search what you're good at and what you'd like to be good at it and follow up on it. And just to echo previous advice - get up and go to bed at the same time. Avoid alcohol like the plague b/c it's a depressant. Eat three squares. Get 20 minutes of exercise every day. Your body won't take care of your brain if your brain doesn't care about your body.
dmolinet
Active member
I'm 46----take it from someone with experience, everyone feels this way!!!! We are so blinded by the photoshopped-airbrushed pics we see, we don't even know what real people look like anymore!! Bo Derek would probably only rate a 6 theses days. Magazine covers are pointing out women's "baby bumps" so often I can't imagine a celebrity leaving home without a hi-colonic. BE PROUD of who you are--get out there and HAVE FUN!!! I spent a couple of years thinking I was too old for this look or that makeup---but I woke my ass up!!!!! If I'm breathing, I'm looking fine!!!!
bAbY_cHiCkEn01
Well-known member
I think its actually a defective gene that females seem to have... I don't think I've ever come across someone who isn't thinking the exact things about themselves... I used to feel like that terribly, I still do occasionally but it sorta comes along like PMS and such... I can pick EVERYTHING wrong with me, and it all came with being made fun of that I hated myself more (it got so bad that I hated myself something chronic and contemplated suicide over it) but everyone said I had a flat nose, yea Its a little flat but hey, I think my chin is non existant an ugly as hell, doesn't help thats where I get all my acne either, I have so many faults, the key thing is to pick up on things you love... for example I hate my chin but I LOVE my eyes, so I play them up every time with makeup (it's also nice as eyes can be played with more so than other features) Love your body as well, how many ladies can say they love say your butt! ME!!! I LOVEEEEEEE my butt and think its one of the best features on my body, its not overly big, its full of cellulite but I love it... Focus on loving things and you won't notice your flaws so much (It also helps to have a partner that loves to touch your body at all possible moments LOL) Seriously, its amazing what oving yourself can do for most things in your life... and DON'T be jealous... I have a friend whose utter gorgeous, has many many many friends, has a bf and basically the WORKS... but honestly, shes a bit of a screw up, gets drunk most weekends to ignore the pain etc etc and shes 22 (but thats another story) so it goes to show that no matter how pretty/ prefect you are, life can suck something chronic for ya, and no matter hwat you look like, you can fully love yourself, and with that others fully will as well...
bAbY_cHiCkEn01
Well-known member
Okay oops... a TAD long SORRY GUYS!!!
