MissMarley
Well-known member
One coworker in particular has been incredibly rude to me lately. We've been remodeling our office, and because we're a non-profit, we didn't have the money to pay for a lot of stuff to be done. So we laid tile, spackled walls, took down sheetrock, and finally painted the whole thing. I worked my ass, while still doing my regular job, but because of some medical conditions (rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia), by the time we were painting, I had to bow out. I painted a day and a half- everyone else painted one more day. So I'm catching hell from this coworker (in a very underhanded, nasty muttered comment way) and I'm so frustrated I don't even want to go to work. My boss is not the kind of person who mediates conflicts, unfortunately, so I don't really have anyone higher-up I can go to. I wrote a department wide email and sent it tonight. Will you read it and tell me what you think? Keep in mind that I work at a Christian health center, that does free STD testing and treatment and prenatal care for men and women living in poverty.
>>Hello all,
I had a conversation with a coworker a few weeks ago that really struck a
chord with me. She told me that she had been frustrated with me when I
wasn't painting as much as everyone else. She told me she hadn't known what medical condition I had really, because I didn't like to discuss it. Because I am a private person, I didn't feel the need to share
my medical history with anyone. But because I do not want to be perceived
as a weak or lazy person, and I truly want any tension in our office to
die, I'm sending this email to clarify a few things.
First of all, my formal diagnosis:
1. Rheumatoid arthritis- a condition in which white blood cells break down
bone mass and cartilage within the joints of the body. I was diagnosed at
13. Since then, I've been in a number of clinical trials of various drugs,
including a round of chemotherapy. This wiped out my immune system, and
has left me with a substandard white blood cell count since then. I have
had to use a walker and a wheelchair at various points of my life. I have
approximately 65% of my joint cartilage remaining. My joints do not easily
flex, and movements are not cushioned as in joint function. I danced with
Pax Fiat because I did not want to give up my passions in life, but I paid
a high price for it. I have damaged my knees and hips severely.
2. Fibromyalgia- a condition that causes widespread pain and tenderness in
the muscles and soft tissue (including tender points) as well as sleep
problems, fatigue, and a variety of other symptoms. These problems can be
severe enough to disrupt a person's work and daily activities.
Fibromyalgia is a syndrome of chronic pain, not a disease or a
psychological disorder. I have chronic insomnia and average maybe 4-5
hours of sleep a night. My doctor speculates that I developed this
condition due to living with rheumatoid arthritis.
3. Ehlers-Danlos syndrome- a genetic condition in which the tendons that
hold various parts of our bodies in place weaken and detach. This has
caused me to be "double-jointed" in a sense, but worsens the arthritis. If
I live past 60, this condition may eventually detach the tendons in my
heart and cause me to die of heart failure.
I take 10-15 pills a day. I live with chronic, widespread pain. I do not
make a movement that does not cause some kind of pain. I do not want any
of you to perceive me as a weak person, because I feel that I have lived
with a lot throughout my life, and most people with these conditions would
not have a job, maintain a relationship, even get out of bed in the
mornings. I'm sorry if I've frustrated you. I ask for your forgiveness.
But I also ask you to try and understand what goes on within me. I am
doing the best that I can within the circumstances I have been given. I'm
not asking for special working conditions, but I am asking you to show me
grace. I'm sorry that I didn't paint as much as some of you- but I did
what I could without crippling myself. I don't want your sympathy, but I
also don't want your disdain. I feel that my work has earned me the right
to be respected as your coworker, and that is what I ask. I count myself
blessed to be a part of the ministry of LifeChoices since 2002. I also
count myself blessed to be a part of a team that is making such a
difference in our community.
In Him,
Marley
>>Hello all,
I had a conversation with a coworker a few weeks ago that really struck a
chord with me. She told me that she had been frustrated with me when I
wasn't painting as much as everyone else. She told me she hadn't known what medical condition I had really, because I didn't like to discuss it. Because I am a private person, I didn't feel the need to share
my medical history with anyone. But because I do not want to be perceived
as a weak or lazy person, and I truly want any tension in our office to
die, I'm sending this email to clarify a few things.
First of all, my formal diagnosis:
1. Rheumatoid arthritis- a condition in which white blood cells break down
bone mass and cartilage within the joints of the body. I was diagnosed at
13. Since then, I've been in a number of clinical trials of various drugs,
including a round of chemotherapy. This wiped out my immune system, and
has left me with a substandard white blood cell count since then. I have
had to use a walker and a wheelchair at various points of my life. I have
approximately 65% of my joint cartilage remaining. My joints do not easily
flex, and movements are not cushioned as in joint function. I danced with
Pax Fiat because I did not want to give up my passions in life, but I paid
a high price for it. I have damaged my knees and hips severely.
2. Fibromyalgia- a condition that causes widespread pain and tenderness in
the muscles and soft tissue (including tender points) as well as sleep
problems, fatigue, and a variety of other symptoms. These problems can be
severe enough to disrupt a person's work and daily activities.
Fibromyalgia is a syndrome of chronic pain, not a disease or a
psychological disorder. I have chronic insomnia and average maybe 4-5
hours of sleep a night. My doctor speculates that I developed this
condition due to living with rheumatoid arthritis.
3. Ehlers-Danlos syndrome- a genetic condition in which the tendons that
hold various parts of our bodies in place weaken and detach. This has
caused me to be "double-jointed" in a sense, but worsens the arthritis. If
I live past 60, this condition may eventually detach the tendons in my
heart and cause me to die of heart failure.
I take 10-15 pills a day. I live with chronic, widespread pain. I do not
make a movement that does not cause some kind of pain. I do not want any
of you to perceive me as a weak person, because I feel that I have lived
with a lot throughout my life, and most people with these conditions would
not have a job, maintain a relationship, even get out of bed in the
mornings. I'm sorry if I've frustrated you. I ask for your forgiveness.
But I also ask you to try and understand what goes on within me. I am
doing the best that I can within the circumstances I have been given. I'm
not asking for special working conditions, but I am asking you to show me
grace. I'm sorry that I didn't paint as much as some of you- but I did
what I could without crippling myself. I don't want your sympathy, but I
also don't want your disdain. I feel that my work has earned me the right
to be respected as your coworker, and that is what I ask. I count myself
blessed to be a part of the ministry of LifeChoices since 2002. I also
count myself blessed to be a part of a team that is making such a
difference in our community.
In Him,
Marley
