Support anyone, for doing it alone??!!

[Poison_Ivy]

Well I was wondering if there where any other military wives in here or if anyone has had to do the entire pregnancy alone i am so nervous! Anyways my hubby leaves for Iraq in abour 2-3 weeks i am 4 months preggo neways this means giving birth alone and being with a kid alone for the first 8 months..This is my first child and it wasnt planned neways i wanted to get some other views on doing it alone...Another thing my hunny wants me to go live with his family while he is gone but i want to be with my family is this being selfish i kinda feel bad bc i love his family but i have this urge to be with my dad and sister so i can have support!??Dunno i am nothing but hormones these days..ughhh

 

[*Stargazer*]

I was 9 months pregnant with our first child when my husband deployed the first time. He came home when she was 4 months old.

I was 8 weeks pregnant with our second child when my husband deployed the second time. He came home two weeks before she was born. I had absolutely horrific hyperemesis the whole pregnancy and moved home to be with my family not long after my husband left. It was just WAY easier.

Go where you will have the most support, you'll need it. Good luck!

 

[sharkbytes]

Well, congratulations on the baby, and I hope your husband comes home quickly, safe, and sound. It absolutely isn't selfish to want to be with your family--you've never done this before, and you don't want to have to worry about being polite to them all the time. By all means, visit them, but go wherever you feel you'll be taken care of the best. And good luck!!!!

 

[pumpkincat210]

Congratulations! I can understand being nervous, it is hard enough as it is with a companion. You'll do fine. Sign up for lamaze classes and mommy classes so you can meet other women you can relate to. Have you decided who you want to be in the birthing room as well? You may get a web cam so your hubby can be with you, i have heard of this and hopefully it is an option for you. When the baby is born I would definitely stay with your own family. That is the time when you need the most support and familiar surroundings. Go visit his family when you can and make sure you explain to them it is not personal, you just need to be with your blood relatives at this time. Make sure you involve your inlaws as much as possible through pictures and scrapbooks etc. You might also find his family is immensely helpful in giving you a break from the baby. 1 person taking care of a newborn is very tiresome. I wish the best for you and your growing family and that your husband comes home well.

 

[kaexbabey]

congratulations! you're from calcium, ny? so does that mean your husband is in ft drum? b/c that's where i'm at too! i agree go where you'll have the most support and where you're comfortable. do you have any friends or neighbors you've been spending time with? maybe they can help. and you're definitely NOT being selfish just because you want to live with your own family. it's who you're comfortable with, and you don't wanna go anywhere where you'll be uncomfortable because that will just stress you out. if you really have no one and you are from ft. drum, maybe you can meet me and my friends

 

[NutMeg]

Do not feel guilty about doing anything you have to in order to minimize the stress and work of a pregnancy/newborn. I'd say make a huge effort to include the in-laws, because they'll probably be pretty sad that your DH isn't around for this. But if you need to be around your family, do it. Congrats, and I hope all goes well.

 

[Poison_Ivy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaexbabey congratulations! you're from calcium, ny? so does that mean your husband is in ft drum? b/c that's where i'm at too! i agree go where you'll have the most support and where you're comfortable. do you have any friends or neighbors you've been spending time with? maybe they can help. and you're definitely NOT being selfish just because you want to live with your own family. it's who you're comfortable with, and you don't wanna go anywhere where you'll be uncomfortable because that will just stress you out. if you really have no one and you are from ft. drum, maybe you can meet me and my friends

Yep he is at drum haha i am outta here as soon as he leave though!

 

[kaexbabey]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Poison_Ivy Yep he is at drum haha i am outta here as soon as he leave though!

lucky! i'd wanna leave too, it's so boring here! we MIGHT move to washington D.C. so i'm hoping for that.

 

[couturesista]

I'm not an Army wife but I am an Army brat ( both parents) I just want to congratulate u on ur baby and send you and ur family heartfelt well wishes! XOXO

 

[SkylarV217]

I'm not an Army Wife, but a military wife in training. In the life that you have, you have to be strong pretty much all the time and in truth that's not always fair to you. No matter what happens your family will be okay. Pregnancy is scary with or without DH being around, it just helps when he's not thousands of miles away and you are not worried about him and he is not worried about you. ( which I know he will be). In the end be strong, and everything will be ok. You will be so busy once little one arrives, DH will be home in no time.

ps - Stay where you feel most comfortable. If its with your family stay there! In all honesty I wouldn't worry about staying where he wants you too if it make things worse for you... In the end he wants you to be happy and taken care of and that is the only thing that is important .

 

[Poison_Ivy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaexbabey congratulations! you're from calcium, ny? so does that mean your husband is in ft drum? b/c that's where i'm at too! i agree go where you'll have the most support and where you're comfortable. do you have any friends or neighbors you've been spending time with? maybe they can help. and you're definitely NOT being selfish just because you want to live with your own family. it's who you're comfortable with, and you don't wanna go anywhere where you'll be uncomfortable because that will just stress you out. if you really have no one and you are from ft. drum, maybe you can meet me and my friends

That would be great i have decided to stay at drum while hes gone and have the baby there

and i need some mac addict friends bc no one understands that i have a make up addiction

 

[Poison_Ivy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaexbabey lucky! i'd wanna leave too, it's so boring here! we MIGHT move to washington D.C. so i'm hoping for that.

Yes go go as fast as you can i love DC