pratbc
Well-known member
I agree with Shimmer. But, I can relay this information from somewhat of a professional standpoint. For 3 years I worked as a "protective investigator" for the Department of Children and Families here in my state. Basically, when somebody alerted the state child abuse hotline that they believed a child was being abused, I was the one who would go out and investigate the claims by interviewing all involved, talking to the child, sometimes taking the child to our physician for an evaluation, and going to the child's school and talking to teachers, counselors, etc. On some occasions of horrendous neglect or abuse, I was the one who would have to remove the child(ren) from the home and find them placement with either an approved relative or a foster home or facility as well as testify in court regarding the case.
Basically, I have seen it all- one of my cases was the worst abuse case in my county's history and I was on the news and in the paper and everything. So, I am quite informed of the procedures and laws here in Florida and I know that other states follow the same model.
I myself do not personally believe in hitting or spanking children. I was beat as a child and pretty much lived in fear of my father. So, I know what it is like and I would NEVER even think of spanking my son. But everyone has different opinions on this.
Legally speaking, a parent has the right to spank or hit a child as long as it does not leave VISIBLE marks and as long as it is not on the head or about the face. But, a few scratch marks and verbal comments from dad would not be enough for placement into a foster home.
ColorMeMAC, I do sympathize with you and can relate due to my own childhood. I agree with keeping a diary and, if you have any marks taking pictures. I believe you should maybe share this information with a guidance counselor or teacher or an adult you trust at school so that maybe this can get resolved without intervention from the "system". But, if you get hit in the face or head or have bad marks or bruises (worse than scratches) you can either report this to a teacher or counselor at school and they legally must contact the authorities or you can call the police.
As for taking away privileges and internet access, this is most definitely NOT abuse in any way. As a mother myself, I believe this to be the correct for of discipline as opposed to getting physical. You are 16 years old, you should be responsible and do your allotted chores- doing them will only help you out in the future when you are on your own. I know plenty of people who were spoiled and never had to do anything at home, then went out into the real world and had no clue how to do anything.
I am not trying to be harsh here, but a foster home is the last place you would want to be (unless, of course your home was truly dangerous for you). Believe me, I have visited many a foster home and sharing a tiny room with 5 or 6 other girls (many of which have severe behavioral problems due to what they have been through), wearing donated, second hand clothes, basically going to school and coming home without being able to go out with friends, no computer or spending money and only being able to see your parents once a week is most likely the polar opposite of the lifestyle you are accustomed to.
But, like I said, if it gets as bad as I mentioned above then you should contact someone at school or the authorities.
Also, I really am not trying to be negative or harsh- just realistic.
Good luck with everything and if you ever need to talk you can always PM me.
<3 Patti
Basically, I have seen it all- one of my cases was the worst abuse case in my county's history and I was on the news and in the paper and everything. So, I am quite informed of the procedures and laws here in Florida and I know that other states follow the same model.
I myself do not personally believe in hitting or spanking children. I was beat as a child and pretty much lived in fear of my father. So, I know what it is like and I would NEVER even think of spanking my son. But everyone has different opinions on this.
Legally speaking, a parent has the right to spank or hit a child as long as it does not leave VISIBLE marks and as long as it is not on the head or about the face. But, a few scratch marks and verbal comments from dad would not be enough for placement into a foster home.
ColorMeMAC, I do sympathize with you and can relate due to my own childhood. I agree with keeping a diary and, if you have any marks taking pictures. I believe you should maybe share this information with a guidance counselor or teacher or an adult you trust at school so that maybe this can get resolved without intervention from the "system". But, if you get hit in the face or head or have bad marks or bruises (worse than scratches) you can either report this to a teacher or counselor at school and they legally must contact the authorities or you can call the police.
As for taking away privileges and internet access, this is most definitely NOT abuse in any way. As a mother myself, I believe this to be the correct for of discipline as opposed to getting physical. You are 16 years old, you should be responsible and do your allotted chores- doing them will only help you out in the future when you are on your own. I know plenty of people who were spoiled and never had to do anything at home, then went out into the real world and had no clue how to do anything.
I am not trying to be harsh here, but a foster home is the last place you would want to be (unless, of course your home was truly dangerous for you). Believe me, I have visited many a foster home and sharing a tiny room with 5 or 6 other girls (many of which have severe behavioral problems due to what they have been through), wearing donated, second hand clothes, basically going to school and coming home without being able to go out with friends, no computer or spending money and only being able to see your parents once a week is most likely the polar opposite of the lifestyle you are accustomed to.
But, like I said, if it gets as bad as I mentioned above then you should contact someone at school or the authorities.
Also, I really am not trying to be negative or harsh- just realistic.
Good luck with everything and if you ever need to talk you can always PM me.
<3 Patti
