College Roommate Frustrations!!!
- Thread starter chocolategoddes
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ginger9
Well-known member
I do agree with TISH, they are likely jealous girls and they feel intimidated because girls who are secure with themselves don't exclude people like that. I also agree with some posters that you should find other activities and friends and give it some time. Just my opinion, if it were me I wouldn't bother to have a conversation with them, because I think they may interpret that as something negative (since they seem to be of the immature variety). I would be polite and cordial with them and do my own thing. Also if they are cool girls maybe it takes some time for them to get to know you and get over their insecurities. I also believe in karma, perhaps they are getting along NOW but who knowS maybe down the road they'll each be bitching about the other to you!! LOL
Enjoy your college experience! Those are the best years!
Enjoy your college experience! Those are the best years!
Boasorte
Well-known member
Quote:
I agree with all the above, plus u can always change ur roommates, if all else fails, just smack em! ( kidding )
College really is ur best years I'm enjoying mine even if it is only comm coll, don't let two skanks ruin ur frist semesters
Originally Posted by ginger9
I do agree with TISH, they are likely jealous girls and they feel intimidated because girls who are secure with themselves don't exclude people like that. I also agree with some posters that you should find other activities and friends and give it some time. Just my opinion, if it were me I wouldn't bother to have a conversation with them, because I think they may interpret that as something negative (since they seem to be of the immature variety). I would be polite and cordial with them and do my own thing. Also if they are cool girls maybe it takes some time for them to get to know you and get over their insecurities. I also believe in karma, perhaps they are getting along NOW but who knowS maybe down the road they'll each be bitching about the other to you!! LOL Enjoy your college experience! Those are the best years! |
I agree with all the above, plus u can always change ur roommates, if all else fails, just smack em! ( kidding )
College really is ur best years I'm enjoying mine even if it is only comm coll, don't let two skanks ruin ur frist semesters
luvsic
Well-known member
GIRL WUT. You are so funny & nice, and everyone in the specktra community loves you! I don't understand why these girls can't see the light.
Ok I'm going to give it to you straight, one part story and the other part advice.
So I am not the best person when it comes to making friends. I am really good with making small talk, but becoming friends is another story. I look for the whole deal in friendships - we're just acquaintances until something prompts us to bond on a deeper level. I wouldn't describe myself as cold, but I am quiet and more reserved initially. In the past, I have tried making the effort to be friends with people (asking them to hang out, talking excessively to them) and I found that most of the time it falls flat. I used to get really discouraged, but I realized now that that's just the way it is - some people you will find you can talk to easily and be friends with easily, and other people you just won't click with (for me, I guess I didn't click with a lot of people lol.) For whatever reason - different expectations, lifestyles whatever. For example I don't think I could ever be the party girl who gets it on every thursday-saturday. And a lot of girls at my school are like that. I still love to go out and have fun, but because I'm not a huge social butterfly I don't have a whole slew of friends who like to party and be into that scene. I would rather spend an evening bonding with someone over dinner most of the time than try to connect with 50 strangeres at a huge party. Get my drift?
I think I digressed too much....lol
Ok, to the point: these girls sound like they aren't worth a drop of you time. By the way you're describing them, they're acting like cliquish, immature high school bitches who are stuck on themselves (a few other people have mentioned that here already. It's TRUE.) AND TOTO, YOU AIN'T IN HIGH SCHOOL ANYMORE. Ugh seriously people like this PISS ME OFF. Just get over your f*cking selves! THIS IS COLLEGE!!! If you're busting your butts to try to be friends with them - STOP. Please. It already sounds like you deserve better than some girls who stick together in their small little world and are shutting you out of it. You've already tried connecting with them and it fell flat...and it's not your fault, so please don't be self concious about it either. You already tried - now move on!
I know it may be difficult coming home and seeing them eat dinner together, coming home and seeing them gossiping, coming home and seeing them watching a Gossip Girl marathon blah blah blah. It's like a constant slap in the face of "ha ha he he you're not in our grouppp" but trust me, once you get the ball rolling with outside friendships (that you will make in class, in clubs, everywhere) I think all you have to do at that point is say hi with a smile and go to your room. Maybe you can invite one friend over to your apartment to just chill in your room if you're feeling too left out. Or you could inviate some of your new friends over to your apartment and throw a mini party with movies and snacks. Whatever you do though, It is a bad baaad idea to act bitter or snarky towards them. I have find through past experience that if you get hurt by somebody, being awkward and bitter is the WORST. It just reflects poorly on you, while the other party doesn't care.
You are pretty, nice and hilarious, I don't see how you'll have a problem making friends. Don't let one bump in the road put you off for your entire college experience! I posted something a while back about being afraid to make friends, but honestly, I find that the best friends I had I made really naturally and seamlessly. And it takes luck, too, to find someone who gets you and has chemistry with you (you'd be surprised in how much luck it takes!) I wasn't even looking to make friends with these people and things just fell into place. You will find the people you click with, it just takes a bit of time. Most college kids, especially freshman, usually like to scan the room and pick one or a few people to cling to within their first few days of class. And they'll act like bff throughout it. But if you can just look past that illusion of the "bff" they're putting up, you'll be so much happier. Look to clubs, people in your dorm, and campus events to make your future friends. Trust me, you'll make them.
I'm sorry that this happened so early with your college experience...but don't let it get you down. <3 good look
*Just a side note: When I first got to college, I saw people paired up everywhere - walking to class, eating lunch...and I felt sad and alone because I would often be alone. But sometimes, being alone is lovely (in moderation of course), and you can embrace it and make it a very special time for yourself. Often I study alone in the library, eat lunch alone outside of my library if it's a pretty day, go shopping alone. And over time, I noticed that for as many people who seemed like they're having such great time together, there were just as many people doing the same thing I was - eating lunch alone, studying alone, walking alone. So don't be fooled and intimdated by people who look like they're having so much fun with their millions of new friends. A lot of the times you aren't alone in feeling this way. It took me a lot of patience and time to realize and be ok with this.
Ok I'm going to give it to you straight, one part story and the other part advice.
So I am not the best person when it comes to making friends. I am really good with making small talk, but becoming friends is another story. I look for the whole deal in friendships - we're just acquaintances until something prompts us to bond on a deeper level. I wouldn't describe myself as cold, but I am quiet and more reserved initially. In the past, I have tried making the effort to be friends with people (asking them to hang out, talking excessively to them) and I found that most of the time it falls flat. I used to get really discouraged, but I realized now that that's just the way it is - some people you will find you can talk to easily and be friends with easily, and other people you just won't click with (for me, I guess I didn't click with a lot of people lol.) For whatever reason - different expectations, lifestyles whatever. For example I don't think I could ever be the party girl who gets it on every thursday-saturday. And a lot of girls at my school are like that. I still love to go out and have fun, but because I'm not a huge social butterfly I don't have a whole slew of friends who like to party and be into that scene. I would rather spend an evening bonding with someone over dinner most of the time than try to connect with 50 strangeres at a huge party. Get my drift?
I think I digressed too much....lol
Ok, to the point: these girls sound like they aren't worth a drop of you time. By the way you're describing them, they're acting like cliquish, immature high school bitches who are stuck on themselves (a few other people have mentioned that here already. It's TRUE.) AND TOTO, YOU AIN'T IN HIGH SCHOOL ANYMORE. Ugh seriously people like this PISS ME OFF. Just get over your f*cking selves! THIS IS COLLEGE!!! If you're busting your butts to try to be friends with them - STOP. Please. It already sounds like you deserve better than some girls who stick together in their small little world and are shutting you out of it. You've already tried connecting with them and it fell flat...and it's not your fault, so please don't be self concious about it either. You already tried - now move on!
I know it may be difficult coming home and seeing them eat dinner together, coming home and seeing them gossiping, coming home and seeing them watching a Gossip Girl marathon blah blah blah. It's like a constant slap in the face of "ha ha he he you're not in our grouppp" but trust me, once you get the ball rolling with outside friendships (that you will make in class, in clubs, everywhere) I think all you have to do at that point is say hi with a smile and go to your room. Maybe you can invite one friend over to your apartment to just chill in your room if you're feeling too left out. Or you could inviate some of your new friends over to your apartment and throw a mini party with movies and snacks. Whatever you do though, It is a bad baaad idea to act bitter or snarky towards them. I have find through past experience that if you get hurt by somebody, being awkward and bitter is the WORST. It just reflects poorly on you, while the other party doesn't care.
You are pretty, nice and hilarious, I don't see how you'll have a problem making friends. Don't let one bump in the road put you off for your entire college experience! I posted something a while back about being afraid to make friends, but honestly, I find that the best friends I had I made really naturally and seamlessly. And it takes luck, too, to find someone who gets you and has chemistry with you (you'd be surprised in how much luck it takes!) I wasn't even looking to make friends with these people and things just fell into place. You will find the people you click with, it just takes a bit of time. Most college kids, especially freshman, usually like to scan the room and pick one or a few people to cling to within their first few days of class. And they'll act like bff throughout it. But if you can just look past that illusion of the "bff" they're putting up, you'll be so much happier. Look to clubs, people in your dorm, and campus events to make your future friends. Trust me, you'll make them.
I'm sorry that this happened so early with your college experience...but don't let it get you down. <3 good look
*Just a side note: When I first got to college, I saw people paired up everywhere - walking to class, eating lunch...and I felt sad and alone because I would often be alone. But sometimes, being alone is lovely (in moderation of course), and you can embrace it and make it a very special time for yourself. Often I study alone in the library, eat lunch alone outside of my library if it's a pretty day, go shopping alone. And over time, I noticed that for as many people who seemed like they're having such great time together, there were just as many people doing the same thing I was - eating lunch alone, studying alone, walking alone. So don't be fooled and intimdated by people who look like they're having so much fun with their millions of new friends. A lot of the times you aren't alone in feeling this way. It took me a lot of patience and time to realize and be ok with this.
chocolategoddes
Well-known member
Quote:
Aww, thank you. This is perfect advice for what I'm going through, especially the appreciating being alone.
Today, I spent three hours on the lawn, no music, no texting, no computer... I just sat there alone with my sketchpad and pencil, and I drew pictures.
I felt so at peace and relaxed.
Then, right when I was heading back to my dorm, guess what I see:
My roommates driving in a car, laughing and dancing together. They didn't even notice I was walking by myself. It felt like something straight out of a movie, actually. But I was so calm and I forgot about how angry and hurt I was.
I do feel like they rub it in my face, but sometimes I can't even tell if they realize it.
I know this sounds dumb, but I'm just not used to people... ignoring me like that.
I'm trying to just occupy myself with different activities so I dont spend as much time in the room. I'm joining a lot of clubs, I have a job on campus, I'm working out at the gym a lot, and I'm studying like crazy already (majoring in biology is no joke!)
I really do want to thank all of you for just taking the time to even read my whiny rant and leaving advice since I've just been miserable these past few days. If I had a bag of sparkly diamond-studded rainbows kisses, I'd give each of you one!
| Originally Posted by luvsic
I know it may be difficult coming home and seeing them eat dinner together, coming home and seeing them gossiping, coming home and seeing them watching a Gossip Girl marathon blah blah blah. It's like a constant slap in the face of "ha ha he he you're not in our grouppp" but trust me, once you get the ball rolling with outside friendships (that you will make in class, in clubs, everywhere) I think all you have to do at that point is say hi with a smile and go to your room. Maybe you can invite one friend over to your apartment to just chill in your room if you're feeling too left out. Or you could inviate some of your new friends over to your apartment and throw a mini party with movies and snacks. Whatever you do though, It is a bad baaad idea to act bitter or snarky towards them. I have find through past experience that if you get hurt by somebody, being awkward and bitter is the WORST. It just reflects poorly on you, while the other party doesn't care. You are pretty, nice and hilarious, I don't see how you'll have a problem making friends. Don't let one bump in the road put you off for your entire college experience! I posted something a while back about being afraid to make friends, but honestly, I find that the best friends I had I made really naturally and seamlessly. And it takes luck, too, to find someone who gets you and has chemistry with you (you'd be surprised in how much luck it takes!) I wasn't even looking to make friends with these people and things just fell into place. You will find the people you click with, it just takes a bit of time. Most college kids, especially freshman, usually like to scan the room and pick one or a few people to cling to within their first few days of class. And they'll act like bff throughout it. But if you can just look past that illusion of the "bff" they're putting up, you'll be so much happier. Look to clubs, people in your dorm, and campus events to make your future friends. Trust me, you'll make them. I'm sorry that this happened so early with your college experience...but don't let it get you down. <3 good look *Just a side note: When I first got to college, I saw people paired up everywhere - walking to class, eating lunch...and I felt sad and alone because I would often be alone. But sometimes, being alone is lovely (in moderation of course), and you can embrace it and make it a very special time for yourself. Often I study alone in the library, eat lunch alone outside of my library if it's a pretty day, go shopping alone. And over time, I noticed that for as many people who seemed like they're having such great time together, there were just as many people doing the same thing I was - eating lunch alone, studying alone, walking alone. So don't be fooled and intimdated by people who look like they're having so much fun with their millions of new friends. A lot of the times you aren't alone in feeling this way. It took me a lot of patience and time to realize and be ok with this. |
Aww, thank you. This is perfect advice for what I'm going through, especially the appreciating being alone.
Today, I spent three hours on the lawn, no music, no texting, no computer... I just sat there alone with my sketchpad and pencil, and I drew pictures.
I felt so at peace and relaxed.
Then, right when I was heading back to my dorm, guess what I see:
My roommates driving in a car, laughing and dancing together. They didn't even notice I was walking by myself. It felt like something straight out of a movie, actually. But I was so calm and I forgot about how angry and hurt I was.
I do feel like they rub it in my face, but sometimes I can't even tell if they realize it.
I know this sounds dumb, but I'm just not used to people... ignoring me like that.
I'm trying to just occupy myself with different activities so I dont spend as much time in the room. I'm joining a lot of clubs, I have a job on campus, I'm working out at the gym a lot, and I'm studying like crazy already (majoring in biology is no joke!)
I really do want to thank all of you for just taking the time to even read my whiny rant and leaving advice since I've just been miserable these past few days. If I had a bag of sparkly diamond-studded rainbows kisses, I'd give each of you one!
spectrolite
Well-known member
Quote:
^I totally get how you would feel awkward confronting them. I mean, even though it is probably the logical thing to do and the right thing to do - doing it might make things worse or more awkward or weird! You just said that they are not the types of girls you would usually befriend - so why not just keep it friendly for now (be nice, smile etc...)and do what others have said and go out and make friends with people that you do "click" with and give them time to warm up to you.
Honesty if they are treating you like this straight off the bat - not bothering to get to know you then they might not even be worth trying to befriend. Biatches!! I wish that I could be your roomie, you are incredibly gorgeous, you have Mac and you RAWK!!! They don't know what they are missin. What ever you do don't let it get you down. Seriously, it's not you, it's THEM.
| Originally Posted by chocolategoddes
This whole situation is VERY high school. You're supposed to venture out and meet different people, not stay in your same clique and talk behind your own roommate's back. I would confront them about it, but I'd kind of feel like I'm "forcing" them to be friends with me and I don't want to do that. To be honest, they aren't really the "type" of girls I usually befriend but I'm still open to getting to know the people. I guess I should be happy that they don't steal my shit and hog everything and I can obviously have friends outside my dorm room, but I'm just really confused and upset over this. I'll never understand girls. 
|
^I totally get how you would feel awkward confronting them. I mean, even though it is probably the logical thing to do and the right thing to do - doing it might make things worse or more awkward or weird! You just said that they are not the types of girls you would usually befriend - so why not just keep it friendly for now (be nice, smile etc...)and do what others have said and go out and make friends with people that you do "click" with and give them time to warm up to you.
Honesty if they are treating you like this straight off the bat - not bothering to get to know you then they might not even be worth trying to befriend. Biatches!! I wish that I could be your roomie, you are incredibly gorgeous, you have Mac and you RAWK!!! They don't know what they are missin. What ever you do don't let it get you down. Seriously, it's not you, it's THEM.
luvsic
Well-known member
Quote:
That's a great first step!!! Your roommates honestly sound like really uncool and clingy people. *eye roll* they'll be out if your system in no time.
It's great that you're keeping busy...especially because as my therapist says, you don't go to school to make friends - your top priority is to do well and be a good student. But of course, you don't want to go throughout school without any friends. It's just nice to know that you're focused on the books for now. I am a firm believer that if you get that out of the way (first at least) everything else will happen naturally.
Be sure to keep us updated on your friend hunt! good luck!!
| Originally Posted by chocolategoddes
Aww, thank you. This is perfect advice for what I'm going through, especially the appreciating being alone. Today, I spent three hours on the lawn, no music, no texting, no computer... I just sat there alone with my sketchpad and pencil, and I drew pictures. I felt so at peace and relaxed. Then, right when I was heading back to my dorm, guess what I see: My roommates driving in a car, laughing and dancing together. They didn't even notice I was walking by myself. It felt like something straight out of a movie, actually. But I was so calm and I forgot about how angry and hurt I was. I do feel like they rub it in my face, but sometimes I can't even tell if they realize it. I know this sounds dumb, but I'm just not used to people... ignoring me like that. I'm trying to just occupy myself with different activities so I dont spend as much time in the room. I'm joining a lot of clubs, I have a job on campus, I'm working out at the gym a lot, and I'm studying like crazy already (majoring in biology is no joke!) I really do want to thank all of you for just taking the time to even read my whiny rant and leaving advice since I've just been miserable these past few days. If I had a bag of sparkly diamond-studded rainbows kisses, I'd give each of you one! |
That's a great first step!!! Your roommates honestly sound like really uncool and clingy people. *eye roll* they'll be out if your system in no time.
It's great that you're keeping busy...especially because as my therapist says, you don't go to school to make friends - your top priority is to do well and be a good student. But of course, you don't want to go throughout school without any friends. It's just nice to know that you're focused on the books for now. I am a firm believer that if you get that out of the way (first at least) everything else will happen naturally.
Be sure to keep us updated on your friend hunt! good luck!!
chocolategoddes
Well-known member
I honestly think being around them isn't good for my emotional/mental health.
Shit, even writing about them makes me angry but it really helps to just let it out, even if no one cares to read it.
I almost feel worthless around them and I don't understand how I can let MYSELF get to that low.
Seriously, I don't even like being in my dorm room when they're in there, so I just hang out in other's people rooms or at school activities (like I played football today with a bunch of guys in my quad and it really took my mind off all this fuckery.)
My advice to anyone in my situation, where you're forced to live with people you actually kind of hate (I know, hate is a strong word but I'm actually starting to hate them) is to simply not to be around them.
Shit, even writing about them makes me angry but it really helps to just let it out, even if no one cares to read it.
I almost feel worthless around them and I don't understand how I can let MYSELF get to that low.
Seriously, I don't even like being in my dorm room when they're in there, so I just hang out in other's people rooms or at school activities (like I played football today with a bunch of guys in my quad and it really took my mind off all this fuckery.)
My advice to anyone in my situation, where you're forced to live with people you actually kind of hate (I know, hate is a strong word but I'm actually starting to hate them) is to simply not to be around them.
Shanti
Well-known member
Wow, this situation sucks.
I bet they're jealous cuz they make their makeup look like shit whereas you're good at it lol.
I know this sounds bitchy of me, but just cuz someone's not as gorgeous on the outside doesn't mean they'll always make up for it on the inside too. XD
Can't you get a room change? Ignorance is bliss, but you know you'd be thrice as happy and relieved to be outta there.
I bet they're jealous cuz they make their makeup look like shit whereas you're good at it lol.
I know this sounds bitchy of me, but just cuz someone's not as gorgeous on the outside doesn't mean they'll always make up for it on the inside too. XD
Can't you get a room change? Ignorance is bliss, but you know you'd be thrice as happy and relieved to be outta there.
jungleland
Well-known member
First of all I'm very sorry and sympathetic of the situation.
Maybe, if it is possible, you should try to change room.
Otherwise, just ignore them, I know it's not easy but it's the only possible solution without being nasty.
It's great that you have other friends and hang oaround with others, also being from time to time, on your own it's not so bad.
And i agree completely with the other poster who stated that it's not you ,it's them!
And frankly, do you really want to be friends with two people who still think they are in high school???
Trust me, you deserve better!!!
Hope you will feel better soon!
Maybe, if it is possible, you should try to change room.
Otherwise, just ignore them, I know it's not easy but it's the only possible solution without being nasty.
It's great that you have other friends and hang oaround with others, also being from time to time, on your own it's not so bad.
And i agree completely with the other poster who stated that it's not you ,it's them!
And frankly, do you really want to be friends with two people who still think they are in high school???
Trust me, you deserve better!!!
Hope you will feel better soon!
COBI
Well-known member
I wouldn't try to force it. You can let them know that you'd be interested in going to a party with them or something, but I don't think you should confront them with how you feel ignored or they're likely to add how sensitive and needy you seem to thier gossip list.
Some people click and some don't; it's nothing personal. You said yourself, they're not girls you would normally befriend; it's likely they feel the same.
My friend's daughter just started her first year of college; she also has a triple. One girl is very much into rural interests (equestrian, future farmer club), one is very urban (shopping, theater (professionally)) and the other is not really passionate about anything one way or the other. Well, the first two did a similar thing to your roommates: they immediately clicked. Despite their differences in interests, their personalities are similar: they are passionate and focused about school, they come from similar family structures, etc.
I think it would be very awkward for all involved if the third roommate tried to force things. That being said, they do try to include the third roommate, but they also are not going to beg her to join them if she acts indifferent or ask them to join them in everything if she's indifferent while they're discussing it.
I wouldn't be surprised if by the end of the first semester, the other roommate has made her own friends that she requests a rooming transfer to live with.
**Don't get too hung up on needing to be friends with your randomly assigned roommated. Go out, make friends that YOU choose, and if you want, request a room change later.**
Some people click and some don't; it's nothing personal. You said yourself, they're not girls you would normally befriend; it's likely they feel the same.
My friend's daughter just started her first year of college; she also has a triple. One girl is very much into rural interests (equestrian, future farmer club), one is very urban (shopping, theater (professionally)) and the other is not really passionate about anything one way or the other. Well, the first two did a similar thing to your roommates: they immediately clicked. Despite their differences in interests, their personalities are similar: they are passionate and focused about school, they come from similar family structures, etc.
I think it would be very awkward for all involved if the third roommate tried to force things. That being said, they do try to include the third roommate, but they also are not going to beg her to join them if she acts indifferent or ask them to join them in everything if she's indifferent while they're discussing it.
I wouldn't be surprised if by the end of the first semester, the other roommate has made her own friends that she requests a rooming transfer to live with.
**Don't get too hung up on needing to be friends with your randomly assigned roommated. Go out, make friends that YOU choose, and if you want, request a room change later.**
InspiredBlue
Well-known member
I hope you can move to another room or get your own apartment. Even if you can stay occupied and out of the room, I think this will affect your emotional state and possibly harm your progress in your studies in the long run. If it's your first year, there is going to be so much new stuff happening in your life and it can get stressful. You don't need this added drama.
On a side note I find it completely absurd how college students are expected to share a bedroom with random other students in the US. So weird. I'm a university student, but I'm also an adult, I own a three room apartment, I have a live in boyfriend and a dog. And if I went on exchange to the US, I'd have to share a bedroom with another girl, like I was a small child?
On a side note I find it completely absurd how college students are expected to share a bedroom with random other students in the US. So weird. I'm a university student, but I'm also an adult, I own a three room apartment, I have a live in boyfriend and a dog. And if I went on exchange to the US, I'd have to share a bedroom with another girl, like I was a small child?
chocolategoddes
Well-known member
I'm definitely going to talk to the housing office very soon!
Last night, the two of them came into the room, drunk with two guys they had just met who were very drunk too. The one guy left but the other guy would not leave and was coming on very strongly toward one roommate.
He said he wanted to spend the night and the girls were going along with it. At this point, I was stunned by this and had to show this fool the way out because there is NO WAY a total stranger, who is drunk and horny, is sleeping in the same room as I am.
I didn't try to confront them because they were so wasted, but I told them how irresponsible and stupid that was and he could've raped them or done something dangerous!
That was really the last straw and my friend said I need to complain to housing immediately.
Quote:
You have a point there. They just randomly throw two people in a room and expect things to work out, saying it'll prep us for the real world. I guess it's just part of Western culture.
Last night, the two of them came into the room, drunk with two guys they had just met who were very drunk too. The one guy left but the other guy would not leave and was coming on very strongly toward one roommate.
He said he wanted to spend the night and the girls were going along with it. At this point, I was stunned by this and had to show this fool the way out because there is NO WAY a total stranger, who is drunk and horny, is sleeping in the same room as I am.
I didn't try to confront them because they were so wasted, but I told them how irresponsible and stupid that was and he could've raped them or done something dangerous!
That was really the last straw and my friend said I need to complain to housing immediately.
Quote:
| Originally Posted by InspiredBlue
On a side note I find it completely absurd how college students are expected to share a bedroom with random other students in the US. So weird. I'm a university student, but I'm also an adult, I own a three room apartment, I have a live in boyfriend and a dog. And if I went on exchange to the US, I'd have to share a bedroom with another girl, like I was a small child? |
You have a point there. They just randomly throw two people in a room and expect things to work out, saying it'll prep us for the real world. I guess it's just part of Western culture.
tara_hearts
Well-known member
Quote:
I am 100% with you on not understanding girls. And I think if you confront them, they will be all fake nice, then later on when they are alone they will be like "Omg she wants to be our friends because we are sooo supercool" /gag /dies
And then they will make it even more of a point to NOT be your friend.
Well from my experience anyways with clique-y girls. I'd just play it off like you could care less what they were doing and when the 'new'ness of their friendship wears off they will open up more to you.
| Originally Posted by chocolategoddes
This whole situation is VERY high school. You're supposed to venture out and meet different people, not stay in your same clique and talk behind your own roommate's back. I would confront them about it, but I'd kind of feel like I'm "forcing" them to be friends with me and I don't want to do that. To be honest, they aren't really the "type" of girls I usually befriend but I'm still open to getting to know the people. I guess I should be happy that they don't steal my shit and hog everything and I can obviously have friends outside my dorm room, but I'm just really confused and upset over this. I'll never understand girls.
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I am 100% with you on not understanding girls. And I think if you confront them, they will be all fake nice, then later on when they are alone they will be like "Omg she wants to be our friends because we are sooo supercool" /gag /dies
And then they will make it even more of a point to NOT be your friend.
Well from my experience anyways with clique-y girls. I'd just play it off like you could care less what they were doing and when the 'new'ness of their friendship wears off they will open up more to you.
tara_hearts
Well-known member
Woooah just read page 2.
I would definately try to get a new room. Bringing home strangers is very dangerous and I would have a fit if someone put me in that situation! I hope things work out better for you.
I would definately try to get a new room. Bringing home strangers is very dangerous and I would have a fit if someone put me in that situation! I hope things work out better for you.
MaskedBeauty
Well-known member
Honestly.. I say fuck 'em. If they want to ignore you and treat you rudely and all that then they aren't worth your time and energy to begin with! Keep your head up! 
MizzVivaGlam
Well-known member
Ugh that really sucks! A sober person cannot live happily around drunk people. Trust me, I know. It will piss you off sooo much and drive you crazy everytime they are drunk. Try to get out of there.
kabuki_KILLER
Well-known member
Here's my take on it. I was always the introverted person in the hall that didn't really go to events 90% of the time. I pretty much stayed cooped up in my room or the library studying brains/nerves or physics. I was cold, but not impolite. Many people were intimidated or scared by me, although I did nothing scary to anyone.
I think some friendships will develop over time. Often, if you hang onto people too much, they get annoyed. When you're cold to them, they cling onto you. Kind of ironic, huh?
Chocolategoddes is a witty and smart girl, it seems, so don't worry about never finding friends. I used to be really sensitive about people not liking me growing up, but if they don't like you for some discriminatory reason, then just ignore them or move elsewhere ASAP if it really bugs you. Trash will always be trash. No point in trying to fix that.
I think some friendships will develop over time. Often, if you hang onto people too much, they get annoyed. When you're cold to them, they cling onto you. Kind of ironic, huh?
Chocolategoddes is a witty and smart girl, it seems, so don't worry about never finding friends. I used to be really sensitive about people not liking me growing up, but if they don't like you for some discriminatory reason, then just ignore them or move elsewhere ASAP if it really bugs you. Trash will always be trash. No point in trying to fix that.
revinn
Well-known member
Oh man, the guys in my res building were JUST as clique-y as the girls last year, if not moreso.. So it's not just girls.
I'd say ask them if you did something to upset them. Chances are they'll say, "no no! Why would you think that?" and hopefully that will be enough of a hint that they aren't including you. Keep doing what you're doing and meeting new people. You seem like an awesome, outgoing person, so I'm sure that's not a problem for you! Don't let the immaturity of a few people ruin your first year of university!
I'd say ask them if you did something to upset them. Chances are they'll say, "no no! Why would you think that?" and hopefully that will be enough of a hint that they aren't including you. Keep doing what you're doing and meeting new people. You seem like an awesome, outgoing person, so I'm sure that's not a problem for you! Don't let the immaturity of a few people ruin your first year of university!
