I divorced finally 2 years ago. We split up the year before. He left me after I gave him an ultimatum - counselling or leave. He chose to leave.
A month before he left he told me, for the 3rd time, that he didn't know whether he loved me anymore or not. I wanted it to work. I really did. After he left we didn't talk for weeks, then he rang me and told me he wanted to talk. I wanted to make the marriage work, but didn't trust him, but agreed to hear what he had to say. He told me he'd realised he still loved me and wanted to work things out, so we did. We started dating again, well, what he considered dating.
After a few months we decided to move back in together. Then a couple of months before we were supposed to move in together, he sent me a message on Facebook telling me he didn't want that anymore. I went home from work, waited for him to finish work then we sat and talked. We went back to his so I could pick my stuff up and I don't know, something inside me snapped. I told him I didn't want to wait for him anymore, it was over. He accepted that, and I left, went to my parents overnight. I came home the next day to go to a house party at a friend's house that he was going to be at.
I ended up getting together with that friend, we're still together now. After me and S got together my ex decided that he still loved me and wanted me back. It was when me and S started seeing each other that I found out that my ex had been sleeping with a colleague behind my back. He'd told S and asked him whether or not he should stay with me.
I also found out that he'd slept with another colleague about a year before that as well. All my thoughts of a 2 year no fault divorce (I'm in the UK) went out the window and after Christmas I petitioned for divorce on the grounds of adultery. It had been a stressful period up until that point, and it didn't get easier until my birthday at the end of Jan, when I snapped and told my ex what I thought of him.
My divorce was granted on St Paddy's day that year, and my gorgeous wonderful bf organised me a surprise "congratulations" divorce party.
I can't say it was the best thing I've ever done. It was necessary to remove me from that situation. My ex leaving was the most heartbreaking, traumatic thing i have ever been through, even more traumatic than losing my uncle, my grandparents, all the betrayals I have suffered. I am still living with the consequences of the trauma today - I am just commencing a course of herbal treatment to put my body back together finally.
I got married young and quickly, but I don't regret it. It shaped me as a person, and if I hadn't been in that situation I might not have met S, who is absolutely wonderful.