Guyfriends who want more than just "friendship"?

[snowflakelashes]

I had to tell my BFF this too. She never got why she had lots of guy friends, was a tom boy but then all these guys wanted to hook up with her too. I think part of it is being beautiful, and that's something you can't help. But it's also that she never wanted to be mean and hurt their feelings and it really got her into some bad situations.

I think generally you just have to not only expect but DEMAND to be treated a certain way to get it.

I'm lucky that I am not super attractive that way, but even I know how to set limits. That only is necessary for me when I'm around the super intoxicated boys. Despite that I still have the "Remove his hand, give him a look and walk away for a while" move down... even if I only really had to use it at parties when I was younger.

It's not being mean, it's respecting yourself. Any guy worth keeping as a friend will take the step back, nurse his bruised ego and know not to cross those lines again.

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

Quote:

Originally Posted by snowflakelashes I had to tell my BFF this too. She never got why she had lots of guy friends, was a tom boy but then all these guys wanted to hook up with her too. I think part of it is being beautiful, and that's something you can't help. But it's also that she never wanted to be mean and hurt their feelings and it really got her into some bad situations. I think generally you just have to not only expect but DEMAND to be treated a certain way to get it. I'm lucky that I am not super attractive that way, but even I know how to set limits. That only is necessary for me when I'm around the super intoxicated boys. Despite that I still have the "Remove his hand, give him a look and walk away for a while" move down... even if I only really had to use it at parties when I was younger. It's not being mean, it's respecting yourself. Any guy worth keeping as a friend will take the step back, nurse his bruised ego and know not to cross those lines again.

Stuff like this use to happen all the time with my girlfriends too! They were constantly getting hit on by guyfriends and even total strangers walking down the street. It was only these few years that it's been starting to happen to me. I've noticed a pattern that it happens a lot. I honestly don't find myself that attractive, I'm okay average. I don't dress revealingly either although I use to.

I know I'm really starting to realize that I NEED to make things go my way when it comes to this. They need to stop flirting or doing whatever with me cause I don't like it.

Ughh, I don't like being around drunk people period. Everyone is just so out of it and yeah a lot can happen. I avoid bars, parties, and places where there are going to be men and alcohol.

 

[Shanti]

Just be cold... it's dry, but they'll get it, and they'll get over it. XP
To an extent I believe in the whole "girls and guys can't be just friends" thing because a really high percentage of the time a guy friend will have feelings for me, yet I know I can have strictly platonic feelings for a guy. Like mentioned before, the guys I'm not attracted to lol. That means... no hot guy friends! Hah.
If you feel mean about turning them down... you can do it in a joke...
Like, they'll make a flirty comment or whatever and I'll shut them down, and do it repeatedly. Cuz friends should be able to joke around XP it's just... different circumstances this time.
IDK, works for me.
It's sooo annoying though. Damn hormones.

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shanti Just be cold... it's dry, but they'll get it, and they'll get over it. XP To an extent I believe in the whole "girls and guys can't be just friends" thing because a really high percentage of the time a guy friend will have feelings for me, yet I know I can have strictly platonic feelings for a guy. Like mentioned before, the guys I'm not attracted to lol. That means... no hot guy friends! Hah. If you feel mean about turning them down... you can do it in a joke... Like, they'll make a flirty comment or whatever and I'll shut them down, and do it repeatedly. Cuz friends should be able to joke around XP it's just... different circumstances this time. IDK, works for me. It's sooo annoying though. Damn hormones.

I know stupid hormones and penises lol. They ruin everything in friendships!

Yeah I know NOW that I need to be a cold ass bitch about this. Cause a simple no will not suffice!

But thank goodness about that whole "xoxo" incident with that guyfriend, he hasn't texted me or anything. I just wish that was enough of a "shut-down" for him but we all know better. Meh if I've gotta be harsh I'll be harsh.