I need a hug...

[AlliSwan]

Okay, so my best friend has been away at a camp all summer, being a counselor. He pretty much stopped calling me a month after he was gone, but I figured he was busy. Well, he met some girl from Australia who was doing the counselor thing as well, and she came home with him for a couple weeks. He hasn't called me once since he got back, the only reason I even KNEW he was back was that he called my boyfriend (who he KIND of knows).

My "best friend" has barely given me the time of day since he's been home. I met the new girl, and she seems ok, I don't DISlike her, but I didn't really find her to be all that special. When I tried to strike up a conversation with her, she wasn't really that receptive.

I don't know if he's being so aloof because she's here (oh, and she's now looking for work around here--YAY) and he's preoccupied or because he's afraid to talk to me because of her getting jealous--either one is total B.S. in my opinion. Please don't ask me if I'M jealous, it's not like that...I just feel like I'm losing my best friend and he doesn't even care.

 

[Janice]

<3 huggles

It's sad he's choosing to alienate you from his new relationship. Yalls relationship might just be too complex for him to attempt to explain to his new GF? Or maybe he's just too in lust with his new girl to care about the outside world? If so he'll regret his decision later, people who ditch friends for lovers always do.

Is it possible he cared about you as more than BF?

I would gently approach him about this and state your concerns. That way you don't have to struggle with the wondering of what's going on.

 

[mac_obsession]

awwww *big hugs* I hope it all works out soon

 

[luvme4me]

*hugs* sucks i know i am begging to think do people even really have best friends

 

[AlliSwan]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janice <3 huggles Yalls relationship might just be too complex for him to attempt to explain to his new GF? Or maybe he's just too in lust with his new girl to care about the outside world? If so he'll regret his decision later, people who ditch friends for lovers always do. Is it possible he cared about you as more than BF?

That's what I can't figure out--is he ignoring me because he has this hot chick around or because he can't deal with seeing me because he doesn't know if we're friends or more.

I told my dad he called me one night (when he was still at camp) and my dad was a little drunk and goes, "Why did he call you? Because he's still in love with you?" right in front of my boyfriend...I mean my boyf, mom, dad, even I all know he kinda is/was/whatever (for the last like five years) in love with me, but he never crossed that line and neither did I. I know he's not trying to make me jealous, it just sucks.

I tried to talk to him about it, but he just thought I was feeling left out from the crowd and invited me to go play pool with them all.

 

[AlliSwan]

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvme4me *hugs* sucks i know i am begging to think do people even really have best friends

This is so sad and so true. I gave up female best friends (actually, female friends period) about two years ago. The first BFF I ever had left me for cooler friends and LOTS of drugs and I just couldn't be around it anymore. The second BFF I had f*ed me over and turned a huge group of MY friends against me--that I had introduced HER to...probably because they were such damn cool people and she wanted to be a part of it badly enough to trash our friendship. Then she dated two of my exes. Nice. THEN, just two years ago, my best friend of the time turned on me as well. This chick and I had been close for almost a decade and she just got WEIRD. My boyfriend and mom agree with me that it was nothing I did but I just can't understand it.

I figured just being friends with guys (I have been hurt so much that even when I try to hang out with girls, it never works because I can't trust them for shit) would make everything easier. For the most part, it has. But I didn't think guys ditched their friends for relationships this easily. I guess I was naive and thought that was more of a chick thing.

 

[AlliSwan]

and...

Thank you guys for the support.

 

[Janice]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlliSwan11 I didn't think guys ditched their friends for relationships this easily.

They ditch those they can't attain for those they can.

 

[singinmys0ng]

*hugs* i'm going through something simliar to this with my best friend. Just hang in there and it will work out in some way or another!