FullWroth
Well-known member
Quote:
You're definitely not being silly - that kind of talk is unacceptable. Depending on how often this has happened before and how often you've put your foot down, it may or may not be time to call it quits. If this is the first time you're actually standing up for yourself, who knows, maybe it's worth another try, if he's willing to take some kind of anger management counseling or at least take some kind of first step to prove his determination to deserve your love, like going to a one-time seminar or reading a pamphlet or SOME gesture (because he can totally MEAN that he'll never do it again, but I doubt he'll be in control of himself the next time he gets pissed, so by the time he realizes what a dick he's being, it's too late).
But if this happens frequently, and if you've firmly told him to stop it before ('cause we girls all know there's a difference between SAYING something he does isn't okay and MEANING it and following through on it), then it may well be time (or way past time) to call it quits. I mean, his temper would never really change, but if he loves you and wants to be with you badly enough, he can go out and learn how to deal with it in a healthy manner, teach himself to react differently. However it ends up, though, make damn sure you can stick to your guns on whatever you choose to do - so many women go through on-off relationships with abusive spouses on the hope of a better future, and it just reinforces the abuser's idea that it's okay to act like this, because you'll always come back once the sting of what they said/did wears off.
Good luck for you both! Even though he's the jerk in this situation, I hope for the best for him too, because issues like his really, really need to be properly examined and controlled in the greater scheme of things, before he gets his ass in REAL trouble.
Originally Posted by eastsidesunset
I so needed someone to tell me I wasn't being silly for thinking he was nuts. |
You're definitely not being silly - that kind of talk is unacceptable. Depending on how often this has happened before and how often you've put your foot down, it may or may not be time to call it quits. If this is the first time you're actually standing up for yourself, who knows, maybe it's worth another try, if he's willing to take some kind of anger management counseling or at least take some kind of first step to prove his determination to deserve your love, like going to a one-time seminar or reading a pamphlet or SOME gesture (because he can totally MEAN that he'll never do it again, but I doubt he'll be in control of himself the next time he gets pissed, so by the time he realizes what a dick he's being, it's too late).
But if this happens frequently, and if you've firmly told him to stop it before ('cause we girls all know there's a difference between SAYING something he does isn't okay and MEANING it and following through on it), then it may well be time (or way past time) to call it quits. I mean, his temper would never really change, but if he loves you and wants to be with you badly enough, he can go out and learn how to deal with it in a healthy manner, teach himself to react differently. However it ends up, though, make damn sure you can stick to your guns on whatever you choose to do - so many women go through on-off relationships with abusive spouses on the hope of a better future, and it just reinforces the abuser's idea that it's okay to act like this, because you'll always come back once the sting of what they said/did wears off.
Good luck for you both! Even though he's the jerk in this situation, I hope for the best for him too, because issues like his really, really need to be properly examined and controlled in the greater scheme of things, before he gets his ass in REAL trouble.
