I'm miserable too

[feebee]

About a bloody boy.

Well an ex to be exact. Dated for a few months last summer... broke up but stayed "friends".
He is in the military and was posted overseas for 6 months during which time we stayed in touch, i sent him letters, parcels etc. I hoped if i showed him how much i cared about him he might regret his decision. He'd phone and email, telling me he couldnt wait to see me when he got home and of course i built my hopes up.

Well he got home in July. We've met a few times, ive gone out to his place (and stayed over.... silly of me i know). And guess what, nothing has changed. He hasnt changed his mind, never will. He says we have no "spark". I'm beautiful, kind, wonderful, heart of gold yadda yadda yadda but im "not for him"

Which is fair enough i suppose. But it sure does hurt.
Sorry, just having a rant. We had a big row last night and decided to just cut all contact, which in a way is for the best because i know ill never be able to move on if he is in my life. Just so upset knowing ill never see him again.... and that he doesnt even care.

Going home to have some chocolate and a cry.

 

[PrimpinKitty]

Ouch, that sucks. But girly, it IS for the best. You need someone who is infatuated with you, who appreciates who you are because you are soooo worth it, all women are! It's totally his loss and it will take time and lots of tears for you to realize that, but hang in there! We're here for ya (and go buy you some makeup!!!)

 

[feebee]

aah thanks primpinkitty.
I guess im just blaming myself and wondering why i wasnt good enough for him.
Have deleted his number and email (even though i know them by heart), and think i will have to hide my phone for a few days cos i have zero willpower!
Went to mac last night but cant even wear my new purchases cos im all blotchy and puffy eyed

Gah men!

 

[Sanne]

hey feebee!

I think you made a good dicision, and it's a very strong thing to do! Try to see the positive: you are single now, meaning if mister FABULOUS runs into your life, you have your heart back where it belongs, so he can steal it

women/girls are strong, and so are you! you'll be great eventually!!

 

[feebee]

Thanks groupie for your kind words. To be honest i think i'll be keeping my heart shut away for a while yet!
Im not strong at all, its taking every ounce of willpower not to phone or text him, or get into the car and drive to his house (ok i wouldnt do that i have some pride

)
Hope you are feeling better, and thinks at home are ok.

 

[Cruella]

Hey Feebee - I'm sorry that you are dealing with this. There is nothing worse than unrequited love. Please don't blame yourself, though. Sometimes things just don't work out like we want them to. It wasn't anything that you did or some failure on your part. As much as it sucks, at least he was honest with you about his feelings instead of dragging your heart around and making you think that something could come out of it.

I have been in your situation many, many times. It does take a ton of willpower not to call or drive by his house. However, it is better to not see or talk to him because you will just keep feeling bad. Good luck to you!

 

[Sanne]

Quote:

Originally Posted by feebee Thanks groupie for your kind words. To be honest i think i'll be keeping my heart shut away for a while yet! Im not strong at all, its taking every ounce of willpower not to phone or text him, or get into the car and drive to his house (ok i wouldnt do that i have some pride ) Hope you are feeling better, and thinks at home are ok.

your soo sweet to think of my problems while you have enough of your own

long ago, when I guy dumped me after a few months of dating, I was crushed. I had this big test @ school a few days later, and I couldn't focus when I was learning for it...
then I thought about what was happening with me at that moment, and I got soo angry! I didn't want tell my kids oneday that mommy had to overdo a year on school, just because mommy had boytrouble.... I refused that, I studied my ass of, and I had the highest result of the class!

Girl, you ARE strong, you just don't know it yet. try to let your heart heal, and when you start to feel better, in weeks, months or maybe longer, you will be a stronger you!!!

now catch this good karma I'm sending your way

 

[feebee]

Thanks guys, i appreciate your replies.
im so stupid, he might be going overseas again and im so worried about him, and upset that i wont even get to say goodbye

im too soft i really need to toughen up!

Groupie i know how it feels to have problems at home so i can really sympathise, my sister is a nightmare to live with, but thats a whole other story!

 

[lovejam]

Please don't beat yourself up over it, or think that you're stupid for feeling the way you do. It's perfectly normal to feel this way. After all, he's someone who obviously means a lot to you, and it's really hard to let that go, even if you know that it's for the best.

Just hang in there. It might not seem like it now, but with time, things will start to get a bit better. You can get through this.

 

[kimmy]

i hate when guys do that...i really do.

but i do agree that it is for the best. and you made a tough decision when you decided to cut off contact with him. a tough, but good decision. because you deserve better. there is NO reason for any man to treat you that way. EVER.

*hugs* it might be a difficult thing to deal with now, but just remember that you made the right decision.