is this wrong of me?

[kimmy]

i have this dog that my cousin gave me when she was about a year old because my cousin couldn't give her the life she deserved. so now i've had this dog for about eight years and i love her to death. she's the best guard dog ever and she's so loyal...not to mention she's a gorgeous dog. she just has a really radiant personality. and yes, i'm talking about her like a person...because she's like my best friend. i can't really put into words what this dog means to me.

we found out two weeks ago that she has liver cancer. there's some enzyme that's supposed to be at 180, and hers are at 2,000...so she's pretty bad. i've cried every single night since we found out because i know what that means. she's been acting normal, just a little slow when i'm outside but my mom says she acts completely different when she goes out there. my sister and my mom both said that dogs naturally hide weakness from their owners, especially if they associate their weakness with their owner's unhappiness and when she was at her worst, i couldn't stop crying while i sat on the floor next to her. now, i don't know if she's putting on an act just so i won't be bummed...or if i just don't want to see that she isn't okay. i know she needs to be put to sleep and i know it's the right, humane thing to do...and even though i'm not ready, it has to be done so we're having it done this week.

i'm so messed up right now. my temper is so short, i got in a huge fight with my sister because i'm just so emotional over this whole situation, i mean a big fight...my sister isn't even talking to me right now. everything makes me cry because somehow everything reminds me that by this time next week, my girl's going to be gone forever. but i found myself today thinking about getting a puppy within the next few weeks.

nothing can replace my baby girl. nothing. she's been away from me before, and i've tried to fill the void when she was gone and i can't. there's something about that dog that i just absolutely adore. so i know i'm not replacing her...but i feel better knowing that there's a dog to protect me. is it wrong that i'm thinking about getting another dog already?

 

[Jaim]

I had my cat for 12 years before she got cancer and had to be put down. I got a kitten a couple of weeks after the fact, not to replace her but to occupy my mind and give me another animal to love. I don't think it's wrong at all. It is really, really tough to lose a pet because they're like family. So think of it simply as adding a new member to your family.

 

[lipstickandhate]

Awww I am so sorry for your situation! I have been there and it is excruciating. My thoughts are with you in the upcoming week- it will not be easy, but as you say, it is the humane thing to do. Cold comfort, I know.

As for the puppy thing, I think you are totally normal. I got a new puppy about three weeks after I put my pit down. It doesn't mean you love her any less or diminish your memories of her. Don't feel guilty doing anything that eases your pain. She wants you to be happy- you're her best friend. Don't be too hard on yourself. And try not to be too hard on others (easier said than done!)

Seriously, though, if you want to talk, I went through this about a year ago. Be strong.

 

[MACATTAK]

I'm so sorry Kimmy...it's so hard to put an animal down, even when you know it's the right thing to do. I don't think it's wrong to want another animal. I think you should do what you need to do. Take care girlie

 

[CantAffordMAC]

aww! i don't think its wrong of you...you aren't replacing your dog, you are just getting another one. theres nothing you can do to save your dog, but theres no reason as to why you can't still have a dog and be happy with that one.
i know a lot of people think of getting a new dog after their dog died as replacing the dog. i would just think of how your dog would want you to feel...he would want you to be happy, and imagine your new dog and your old dog playing together! dogs are such great animals, you have no reason to feel wrong or guilty. nothing will replace your dog or all the memories and time you shared together....and you will always have those to look back on. But you can also have a new dog to make new memories with as well.

this is so sad. I am sorry you have to go through this! sometimes i'm glad i am allergic to dogs and cats because if i had to go thru anything like this, I'd be just so hurt.

 

[SparklingWaves]

There's a philosophy that animal spirits choose us. Others believe that they return to us. Sending peace and comfort to you.

 

[righteothen]

You're not replacing your dog, your are allowing another dog to live in your home, and giving it a great life. When my cat was run over by a car while I was away at college (I cried so hard when I found out) my mother got another cat within a couple of weeks. My family has had pets consistently since before I was born, and I just can't image a life without at least one animal sharing my house.

 

[frocher]

I'm sorry, this situation sounds tough. I always look at it as wanting another friend, instead of replacing your old one. You have plenty of space it your life for different friends.

 

[janwa09]

I'm so sorry for your loss! A few years ago we lost our dachsund--until now we don't know what happened to her, coz we never saw her again... I keep on praying that wherever she may be...that she's loved and is healthy...but we're just comforting ourselves in thinking positively. I admit until now, I cry whenever I think about her coz I feel like I've failed to protect her...god it's really such an awful feeling. We have an adorable beagle right now and we love her to death but I sometimes feel so much guilt with what happened to our dachsund...I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to take care of a dog.

 

[Beauty Mark]

If you're not replacing the dog and you, by all means, think you're ready, go for it. If you're going to a shelter, you're saving another life.

 

[xsnowwhite]

first of all im so sorry about what youre going through! that happend to my cat last year and its the worst thing ever.

And second I dont think its wrong to think about wanting a new pet. When my cat died i wanted a new one just because it was hard and so getting a new cat helped me take my mind off of what happend though my new cat isnt my old one at all but still.

And i agree with beauty mark, you should consider going to a shelter and not just getting a puppy .Its sad some animals have to sit there for ages. Thats what I did and i dont regret it at all!

 

[Beauty Mark]

What's really sad at the no-kill shelters is some of those animals are there over a year. I just got my new cats, and I was amazed that no one adopted those cats

. They weren't old or strange, either.

Adopt even a puppy, though. A lot of vets have the philosophy that they all need homes, and it actually is true. There were cats at this shelter that had been there since kittens. I imagine the same is true for dogs.

If you want to do something else and if you have the money, you could do a small memorial donation in the name of your pet to some animal org or a shelter. This year, my cats are all "donating" money to their shelters at Christmas and on the day I adopted them

 

[kimmy]

we had it done today. and i thought going in that i would be okay, but it only took about five minutes of sitting in the waiting room before i started crying and couldn't stop. i would have rather her not seen me like that when she was about to go, but i couldn't help it.

i'm thinking about going to the shelter this weekend and looking around to see if any dog really cliques with me...thank you all for your support.

 

[righteothen]

I'm so sorry. At least her pain is over. What you did was right, it would have been selfish to keep her in such pain.

And no matter how she saw you before she went, at least you were there when it happened.

 

[macface]

Im so sorry I know how it is to loose a pet best friend.

 

[Beauty Mark]

I'm sure your dog's memories aren't going to be of you crying but of happier moments, like rubbing her belly or feeding her treats.

 

[Purple Haze]

Hi Kimmy, I completely understand your pain. I lost my Black Lab last year to pancreatitis complications (it was the WORST Christmas in the world, ever.) It was an awful situation and the mental pictures still are stuck in my head to this day... I still regret not getting a pet afterwards, my parents are older and they can't handle looking after a pet now, since I work full time. I'm still trying to cope with the emptiness. It's so incredibly tough.

PLEASE do not feel bad for wanting another companion. No two pets will ever be alike. Animals are SOOOOOOOOOOOOO FRIGGIN' SPECIAL. Call me crazy, but I know deep down inside they understand us more than anyone or anything ever could, and having another will just continue the beautiful cycle of life as it is meant to be. Your pet never truly dies. It lives in your heart and in your memory. Love surpasses and transcends all.............Sending you alot of comfort and peace. Be STRONG.

Let us know how you're doin!

 

[xsnowwhite]

im sorry!
i agree with the others though, she will remember you as always being there for you and you crying showed your love for her.

good luck with your search to find a new puppy!

 

[xsnowwhite]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Purple Haze Call me crazy, but I know deep down inside they understand us more than anyone or anything ever could, and having another will just continue the beautiful cycle of life as it is meant to be.

sort of OT but purple haze I completely agree/know where you're coming from! Lol people think im nuts but i swear ym kitty is the person who totally understands. Shes the meanest cat in the world but when im crying or having a bad day, she can tell i know it, and she will be nice for once and let me pet her/hold her. Its sort of funny but it just goes to show that pets love us as much as we love them!

 

[kimmy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by xsnowwhite sort of OT but purple haze I completely agree/know where you're coming from! Lol people think im nuts but i swear ym kitty is the person who totally understands. Shes the meanest cat in the world but when im crying or having a bad day, she can tell i know it, and she will be nice for once and let me pet her/hold her. Its sort of funny but it just goes to show that pets love us as much as we love them!

it's true. my cats don't get along very well, but if i'm having a bad day they'll put that aside and both come sleep on my bed with me. and a long while ago, when i was having problems with my ex...no matter what any person said, i felt so hurt and messed up but when i went outside with my dog, i think she knew and she always made me feel better...i still don't know how. but i could always depend on her to make me feel okay again.

i miss her like all hell. when we found out she had cancer i got this really gnarly headache and i've been getting that same headache off and on since we had her put to sleep..not sure what that's about, but i think i'm doing okay...or at least as okay as i could be.

i can't tell you ladies how much i appreciate all the feedback and support. :loveya: