Life Pre-Determined or Are We In Charge of Our Destiny?

[ms.marymac]

I have to ask...and please don't think of this question as an attack. I was raised in a very religious household and actually turned away from of it b/c of the FEAR that was put into me. I was taught that God gives you a choice to follow him or go your own way, and people would insist that it is your choice...all loving God and all that. If you decide to turn away, you will suffer in your life and will eventually spend an eternity in hell. If you are not like me, you will spend an eternity in hell. If you do not witness others about me, you will go to hell, etc... This is what I grew up learning and it always seemed more like an ultimatum than a choice. Sorry if I took this in another direction, but nobody has ever been able to explain that to me.

 

[rosasola1]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ms.marymac I have to ask...and please don't think of this question as an attack. I was raised in a very religious household and actually turned away from of it b/c of the FEAR that was put into me. I was taught that God gives you a choice to follow him or go your own way, and people would insist that it is your choice...all loving God and all that. If you decide to turn away, you will suffer in your life and will eventually spend an eternity in hell. If you are not like me, you will spend an eternity in hell. If you do not witness others about me, you will go to hell, etc... This is what I grew up learning and it always seemed more like an ultimatum than a choice. Sorry if I took this in another direction, but nobody has ever been able to explain that to me.

Sadly, churches do do this... and it makes me sooooo mad!!

People result to intimidation, and instilling fear in others when they lack in communication skills and they are lacking in full knowledge of God's word. What is the most frustrating thing to me is that people can't take the Bible as what it is... that we must find things we must change and therefore it results in tons of denominations. I can feel you on this very much because my Husband was also raised this way... I am happy to say that I found God after all that had been changed by the generation after the "hell, fire and brimstone" method of preaching. people in the church are wising up to the fact that fear is NOT of God.... it is not a tactic He uses to scare us into wanting Him, you know?

I am so sorry that that happened to you... unfortunately, there are far too many stories like yours... I was so privileged to have found the church when it was headed in the right direction. I am taught nothing else but to love everyone... and I genuinely do. We are taught to show the love of Christ... not the "fear". I wanna give you a hug! lol Becuase i fell that people mess stuff up too much for others... and they obviously have for you

Just be happy to know that things have changed!

God wants nothing more than for us to know who He REALLY is.

and i just want to say that... i'm not a sterotypical Christian... I don't want to push anything on anyone, but I am super open to any questions... although I have had way too many people "damn" me becuase of my beliefs which is why I am cautious opening up about this sort of stuff.

Message me sometime

 

[NutMeg]

^I'm happy for you that your religious beliefs are a positive force in your life, but I do have to say that I don't share your beliefs. I feel like there are too many contradictions in all of the major religions that I have studied to buy into them.

 

[rosasola1]

Quote:

Originally Posted by NutMeg ^I'm happy for you that your religious beliefs are a positive force in your life, but I do have to say that I don't share your beliefs. I feel like there are too many contradictions in all of the major religions that I have studied to buy into them.

Agreed, but In Christianity, what have you learned to be a contradiction? I am only asking because I am curious... I haven't encountered any so far

 

[NutMeg]

Some problems I have with Christianity specifically: Creationism, pretty much all you've said in this thread about free will and God and destiny, the concept that everyone who doesn't accept Christ is going to hell, lack of tolerance for other religions, and I don't know if this applies to you specifically but the Trinity, and for that matter how all the Christian branches disagree with each other, but each of them thinks that they're right... Kind of like organized religion in general. There are a number of other things, but those are what came to mind.

I don't want you to feel like I'm attacking your beliefs because I'm not. I just don't agree with them.

 

[User49]

I think that the choices you make strongly influence things that happen to you. Everything happens for a reason= "cause and effect".

If you have lived with a lot of regret. Find out what influenced you to make choices you ended up regretting. A lot of times its because you are trying to make other people happy, not yourself. Do what you know works for you. And put people first when they would do the same for you.

I think everyone feels a bit lost sometimes. I know I do. Life is full of so much pain, but it also has a lot of love and good things to offer. I'd say it's a 50/50 thing. And you have to choose your attitude and your way of coping with this. xx

 

[rosasola1]

No I don't, thank you for being so nice

Valid point. If i could I would write you regarding everything u mentioned, I would but its just epic... the thing about God is... If we could wrap our brains around Him then He wouldn't be so mighty... it's just a faith thing... I don't know if that even answers anything lol.

I'm terrible at putting idea to "paper" :\

 

[NutMeg]

Feel free to PM me, I love debating.

Anyway, I guess I also don't like the explanation that it doesn't make sense because God is so mighty... Then how do you know that you're right and everyone else is wrong? Why does not having an explanation make it correct?

 

[FiestyFemme]

I don't believe in pre-destination at all. I believe we are all in charge of our destinies, and you have to unlock your destiny for yourself. It is complicated though, because while you may make your own choices, other people and their choices often affect you (and vice versa). However, I don't think anything is set in stone. I think our choices set us on a certain course, and that no matter what the action, it will have consequences (good or bad). Basically we are free to choose, and we will reap what we sow, but we're also influenced by those around us. I feel like that's not a great explanation, but it's the best I've got right now.

 

[kimmy]

i see it like this: people do things, those things yield outcomes, those outcomes teach us something about ourselves, other people or the world around us in general. i feel like everything that happens is for a reason. i don't think god makes these things happen, i don't think any diety does. i don't know that i'd call it fate, but i don't really know how else to describe it...so i guess i'll go with that. i think we're in charge of our own destiny to a certain extent, but that no matter what path we choose to take, we'll end up where we're meant to be in the long run.

i don't think that in writing, that made any sense, but in my brain it does.

 

[Loirt]

Honestly? I'm not sure yet. I do believe in God, but...everything happens for a reason?
There are so many bad things happening and I just don't see the reason behind rape, murder, abuse, starvation....and so many other things. People can tell lots of wonderful stories about how everything happen for a reason, but this stories are usually good ones. But what are the reasons behind children dying of cancer, or children being raped and abused by their own parents, etc etc...?

I do think God gives people a free will, unlike his angels who must do what he wants. But our choices are always determined of course by your character, and your character is determined also by things you've experienced in your life, like in your childhood and all...

I don't think you can control everything in your life, like in the example of excellent applications forms for college and not getting in because there's just someone else deciding on that, and you know nothing about that person.

So in short, I just don't know. and I'll stop babbling now...