loving two people at once...what to do?

eeyorebb

Active member
ok..this is gonna be quite a long post. i'm sooo confused!!

see, i'm dating my best friend, whom i've known for 9 years now...and not everything is great. also whilst i love him heaps, we have differences that is making me want to back out, such as, he's a more traditional, reserved type person whereas i'm very outgoing and free. so i almost always do things that he doesnt like, such as getting a piggyback from a guy friend (remember this guy, he comes in later in the story)....cos i was feeling a bit sick and our friends were all walking in the wind (my bf wasnt there as usual, he never "comes out to play" keke)...and its just that, i also have two guy friends who are my "brothers", they were there for me when my bf (then best friend) wasn't, but having guys this close to me makes it hard on my boy.

he's overseas at the moment, and i'm finding that while i miss him, i'm also falling for someone else, i dont think its BECAUSE he's not here, i think its just going out with him on NYE and wiht other friends, i had such a good time. this is the same guy taht piggybacked me, and played twister (bad positions!) with me, i kinda liked him midyear at school already, but felt hopeless about it and it wasnt strong. but now he's pretty flirty with me (IMO anyways)...i told two of my close friends about my feelings and now they are being very "bad" !! haha..also, this guy likes someone, but i dont know who, only he and one of the friends i told my feelings to know, but somehow i dont think its ALL hopeless, its just the way he treats me. and wiht this guy, he's a free spirit too, and whilst he may not be as smart as my current bf (determined purely by our academic score at the end of high school), he's a really smart person, and great fun...and omg...just quite tank...soo
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so what do i do? i think i'm in love wiht two people. i waited so long to go out with my best friend, he's seemingly a bit obessessed with me now too, and i'm finding out mayb e he's just too reserved and stuff for me, and his "obsession" a nd eveyrthing is making me want to back out. but we've only been dating for like 5 weeks!. and then the other guy? i dont know what to do with him!
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Cruella

Well-known member
It is definitely possible to love 2 people at the same time. It sounds like your current boyfriend is better as just a "friend." You seem to have different interests/personalities. Since you have only been officially dating 5 weeks, maybe you can ease your way out of the boyfriend/girlfriend thing and still remain friends.
 

eeyorebb

Active member
i'm scared to break his heart..but is it true that if i do break it off now, it'll be easier to return to friends than if i waited longer?

plus..i really doubt that other guy likes me...its probably just a one way thing..but none the less he makes me realise my current bf isnt really right for me.
 

Cruella

Well-known member
I think it is always better to break things off sooner rather than later; he is probably going to be a bit hurt anyway, but if you let things drag on, he will probably feel really foolish.

You might not be able to go back to being best friends immediately but things can work out. He will just need some time to lick his wounds.

Good luck!
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Peaches

Well-known member
Tell him you want to take it a little slower and see how it goes.

Its natural to have romantic type feelings towards someone else who you feel comfortable around. You just have to imagine being in a relationship with them and if you could put up with them. If you're not happy with someone, you have to tell them.

I was with my ex for a year after leaving the love of my life for him... I really regret it but I met someone else while I was with him and finally got the courage to leave him. It wouldve been easier had I done it sooner but Im glad its all over. Messy love quadrangle of my life.
 
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