my fiance is being accused of being a child predator.. wtf?

[neezer]

to touch and piggyback on alot of what's been said already, it is true that if your page on myspace is under 18, a minor cannot add a adult and for some people's settings they have it where even an adult cannot be contacted by anyone under 18.

if she added him as a friend then she was probably being "grown" from the start, and her age would have had to change from HER side for him to have gotten a request.

Personally, 3 things, and not to be rude at all, im just saying REAL TALK:

1) you might say you know him but always with the trust you have, keep a small bit of suspcion. alot of times you might be with someone and they are cool but people get CURIOUS. not saying he was curious because it sounds like the mom is overprotective and crazy anyways but JUST SAYING. Lifetime does not tell tales, alot of those stories that they put on there HAPPEN. just saying. not comparing you to a lifetime movie either lol but just saying dont rule it out.

2) If in fact anybody sent messages and they are not present, IF legal action comes about, even if erased ALL MESSAGES CAN BE RETRIEVED...nothing is ever "deleted" but we as regular users cant access that information, myspace and the law enforcement hire people to do stuff like that.

Finally, 3) Remember that if everything she says falls through and your fiance is acquitted or even put out in your community in a bad reflection and everything ends up in his favor, you can sue for DEFAMATION.

And

if in fact this all goes down, idk if you pray or if you are religious but know that God is only going to put you and your fiance through what you can handle...even though it will seem tough and can be embarrasing to him and you. Don't let evil people steal your joy or shine, keep your head high and stay focused on doing the right things in life and you wont ever have to worry about someone troubling you...and again if you read the bible read Psalms 27:
1 The L[SIZE=-1]ORD[/SIZE] is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear? The L[SIZE=-1]ORD[/SIZE] is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? 2 When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes,
came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. 3 Though a host should encamp against me,
my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident.
sorry i just had a moment lol but for real, i wish you the best with everything and i hope your situation works out in the positive direction.

and if i cursed in this response, God, my bad

 

[kimmy]

"investergater" hahaha whoa...i hope she didn't graduate high school spelling like that. if she did, may god help us.

besides that point though, you have to keep in mind that the kid may have said something to the mom to prompt this behaviour. whether the kid has or hasn't is beyond me (and maybe even you) and if she did say something, whether it has any real merit or not, is also beyond me.

if she did call the cops, they will investigate. cops can't just ignore things because the suspect's fiancee thinks the allegations are bullshit. if they actually did call the police, it will be to your benefit. if he is found innocent, then all will be just peachy and you can continue with your life together. if he is found guilty of something sinister, then at least you'll be able to cut ties with him now rather than finding out in twenty years that he's been touching your daughter.

ps. discussions like this are usually better suited to the deep thoughts forum.

 

[SkylarV217]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kimmy besides that point though, you have to keep in mind that the kid may have said something to the mom to prompt this behaviour. whether the kid has or hasn't is beyond me (and maybe even you) and if she did say something, whether it has any real merit or not, is also beyond me.

I agree the chick may have been getting into trouble for adding an older guy and lied about it to keep from getting into trouble... teenagers are known for such behavior .... It is a real possibility .

 

[Delilah]

Quote:

Originally Posted by COBI I do hope it is only the mother over-reacting, but, in all honesty, it is impossible for any of us here on specktra to know if that is the case or not. People are villifying the mother without basis (or on the basis of a limited view of the situation) while at the same time saying it's not right that the mother is villifying the fiance; kind of a double standard, no? <snip> Again, I am not saying the OP's fiance is a predator, but it is "easy" to live and love someone and not be exposed to that side of their pysche.

I just had to post in response, because it does seem a little like you are justifying the mothers behaviour.

I firmly believe the mother is entitled to take the steps she has to protect her daughter. What she does NOT have the right to do is spread rumours of impropriety yet to be proved.

I don't think I need to explain how incredibly damaging it can be to have the word pedophile follow you around. Imagine if you were in the same position - you stopped to help a crying child and the mother wrote to all your friends, family & colleagues saying you molested her child. It wouldn't matter if it wasn't true because mud sticks. And it can ruin lives.

This man does not deserve to have his reputation tarnished before any of the allegations are confirmed. Stick by your man Citre, he will need your support.

 

[tiffanykei]

I'm sorry.. I just had to point out that whoever this lady is needs to get over herself. Plus, she has horrible grammar.

She probably blocked you from ever replying back.. I HATE IT WHEN THEY DO THAT!

Tila blocked me from writing to her..

She hates me. boo.

 

[COBI]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delilah I just had to post in response, because it does seem a little like you are justifying the mothers behaviour. I firmly believe the mother is entitled to take the steps she has to protect her daughter. What she does NOT have the right to do is spread rumours of impropriety yet to be proved. I don't think I need to explain how incredibly damaging it can be to have the word pedophile follow you around. Imagine if you were in the same position - you stopped to help a crying child and the mother wrote to all your friends, family & colleagues saying you molested her child. It wouldn't matter if it wasn't true because mud sticks. And it can ruin lives. This man does not deserve to have his reputation tarnished before any of the allegations are confirmed. Stick by your man Citre, he will need your support.

My response was because so many people are immediately assuming that the mother is crazy and wrong... and using her poor spelling as an example of how wrong she is. I think those comments about her spelling/grammar are somewhat silly; even the children of uneducated (or less educated) people can be victims. Just because someone doesn't have perfect grammar and spelling doesn't mean that nothing inappropriate has happened. People are jumping all over this mother because the OP (who as the accused's fiance may not be the most objective person) said that it can't be true.

I honestly don't view the mother sending an e-mail to the OP (again, the accused's fiance) as "spreading rumors". If you tell me that she has posted bulletins or sent e-mails to many people with the same information that is different, but my impression from the OP's post was that she contacted the OP directly as a way of keeping her informed of the accusations to come.

Tell the OP to stand by her man, tell her that it will be fine and the truth will come out... I don't have any problem with that because that's probably how it will end, but I do have a problem with calling the lady crazy, etc., because she is being protective of her daughter. I don't know any mother who faced with the prospect/possibility of their child being preyed (even if it turns out to be inaccurate) that wouldn't overreact to some extent at the onset especially with the stories that you hear on the news about how some of these situations end.

Either way, it *is* possible to support the OP without slamming or villifying the mother.

 

[bellaconnie80]

Girls I love you all but Im going to have to be a 'bitch' and say... first of all Im 27yrs old and I dont know how much high school has changed, but when I was in high school a 19yo dint want anything to do with a 15yo because they thought they were 'too cool' .. unless the chick was really hot, and they want you know what and seriously why is everyone attaking the mother? she is doing what a mother is suppose to be doing.. so what if she cant spell, at least she is being a mother to her 15yo and is aware what her daughter is up to.. and how come no one sees anything wrong with the 19yo having a fiance and wanting to be friends with a 15yr behind his girl's back.. its kindda strange that he never mentioned anything to his girl.. anywas, maybe Im too old fashioned for you girls but I think when your in a relationship respect and communication is key...

 

[SkylarV217]

Citre- Can we get an update ?

 

[joraye]

Sorry if this is a repeat of info already stated....
but I think you can now have a setting on MySpace where people who are not your friends cannot send you messages.

This happened to me when a acquaintance of mine sent me a message about trying to ruin her life*, etc, etc. I wrote a 7 paragraph response to her, only for it to tell me I couldn't reply to her message. I couldn't even send the response from my boyfriend's account, but her cousin (who is her friend) could still send her messages, and we are all well over 21 even.

(* - long story, but it involves her cheating boyfriend, and her refusal to believe her boyfriend was/would cheat.....even with chat logs and text message'd proof)