LoveMakeup4Real
Well-known member
Glad to see that you're doing better 
But please remember that your ex is only human though. Nothing more, nothing less. Do not give him this much power over you. I know not everyone will agree...but I've come to learn that no man will ever have this much authority over my life again. I will no longer cry in front of a man and humiliate myself questioning his decisions, all the while making him feel like he is something above me, only boosting his ego. I say this because years ago I fell so deeply in love with this man I thought would one day be my husband. He was my first love, everything. To make a long story short, I had to break up with him because I no longer trusted him, I had suspicions that he was seeing another woman. When I got home I cried my eyes out, asked God why lol, isolated myself from the rest of the world, I was really down about this breakup, and we were not together as long as you were with your guy (3 years here, 9 years is a long time). But anyway, one day I realized that although it was OK to cry, let it all out, I had to move on with my life. I was no longer going to let this man, another human being like myself, have this much control and tight grip on me.
I told myself that he just didn't love me anymore, because if he did he would not let me go so quickly, he would fight to keep me in his life, he would not cheat on me, he would not leave me hanging like that, he would tell me he loved me back. I forced myself to recognize the truth; and the truth was that he was done with me... that the feelings I had for him weren't mutual. Once I did, I slowly but surely started to get better. Just remember that a man, is a man, is a man. I am not belittling men lol, but just don't treat him like he is a God/superior or anything belonging on a pedestal or anything but a human being. He has moved on, (and you're clearly doing the same). Your ex was not the man for you. I know after something like this we want a reason as to why it happened; why now, why us, why this, why that... I truly believe that everything happens for a reason (yes, cliche, but true, at least for me) but forget the question why and just accept it for what it is. He didn't have the decency to be sympathetic and give you a valid answer as to why he was leaving (especially after you've given him almost 10 years of your life), then he isn't good enough to remain in your thoughts. His loss!
And trust me, they do return! My ex tried to get me back but I refused to allow him to re-enter my life. He was indecisive about us in the past, he does not deserve another chance. Ignore him if/when he returns!
One day you'll look back at this point in your life and just smile (with your husband's arms holding you tight). You'll be alright
I wish you the best!
But please remember that your ex is only human though. Nothing more, nothing less. Do not give him this much power over you. I know not everyone will agree...but I've come to learn that no man will ever have this much authority over my life again. I will no longer cry in front of a man and humiliate myself questioning his decisions, all the while making him feel like he is something above me, only boosting his ego. I say this because years ago I fell so deeply in love with this man I thought would one day be my husband. He was my first love, everything. To make a long story short, I had to break up with him because I no longer trusted him, I had suspicions that he was seeing another woman. When I got home I cried my eyes out, asked God why lol, isolated myself from the rest of the world, I was really down about this breakup, and we were not together as long as you were with your guy (3 years here, 9 years is a long time). But anyway, one day I realized that although it was OK to cry, let it all out, I had to move on with my life. I was no longer going to let this man, another human being like myself, have this much control and tight grip on me.
I told myself that he just didn't love me anymore, because if he did he would not let me go so quickly, he would fight to keep me in his life, he would not cheat on me, he would not leave me hanging like that, he would tell me he loved me back. I forced myself to recognize the truth; and the truth was that he was done with me... that the feelings I had for him weren't mutual. Once I did, I slowly but surely started to get better. Just remember that a man, is a man, is a man. I am not belittling men lol, but just don't treat him like he is a God/superior or anything belonging on a pedestal or anything but a human being. He has moved on, (and you're clearly doing the same). Your ex was not the man for you. I know after something like this we want a reason as to why it happened; why now, why us, why this, why that... I truly believe that everything happens for a reason (yes, cliche, but true, at least for me) but forget the question why and just accept it for what it is. He didn't have the decency to be sympathetic and give you a valid answer as to why he was leaving (especially after you've given him almost 10 years of your life), then he isn't good enough to remain in your thoughts. His loss!
And trust me, they do return! My ex tried to get me back but I refused to allow him to re-enter my life. He was indecisive about us in the past, he does not deserve another chance. Ignore him if/when he returns!
One day you'll look back at this point in your life and just smile (with your husband's arms holding you tight). You'll be alright
