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ashk36
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I know exactly how you feel. Period. I'm 25 and haven't gone back to school because I have no passion for anything! And whatever I am passionate about are things that aren't gonna get me very far. Culinary school is hours away and I'm not moving, and don't forget it's ridiculously out of my price range. Baking cakes is nothing but a hobby. I don't practice shooting pool enough so we all know I'm never gonna be a damn professional. Grooming dogs is not a passion for me and I don't have the patience. And makeup? Hah! Yeah like there's a lot of jobs for a good makeup artist in South Carolina. I feel like I'm not smart enough, artistic enough, creative enough, patient enough, or motivated enough to push forward and do SOMETHING. I'd LOVE to do something, but fuck if I know what I'm meant to do. Sorry I have no words of encouragement, but hopefully it makes you feel a little better knowing you're not alone in the way you're feeling.
I know exactly how you feel. Period. I'm 25 and haven't gone back to school because I have no passion for anything! And whatever I am passionate about are things that aren't gonna get me very far. Culinary school is hours away and I'm not moving, and don't forget it's ridiculously out of my price range. Baking cakes is nothing but a hobby. I don't practice shooting pool enough so we all know I'm never gonna be a damn professional. Grooming dogs is not a passion for me and I don't have the patience. And makeup? Hah! Yeah like there's a lot of jobs for a good makeup artist in South Carolina. I feel like I'm not smart enough, artistic enough, creative enough, patient enough, or motivated enough to push forward and do SOMETHING. I'd LOVE to do something, but fuck if I know what I'm meant to do. Sorry I have no words of encouragement, but hopefully it makes you feel a little better knowing you're not alone in the way you're feeling.
X4biddenxLustX
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
Hey hun, I've been meaning to reply to your PM but I have been utterly exhausted.
Again, I seriously can relate very well to your situation. You just don't feel motivated or productive. I felt the exact same way from the time I graduated hs and even now and I just found a job finally last month. I'm also only working parttime about 24 hours a week. I come home and do absolutely NOTHING. I don't clean, do chores or anything at home. I don't have the energy to care about that. So I feel even more unproductive than before.
I think your in a rut right now. We just sometimes get into the funk of something and it's hard to get out. You'll get out of it when the time is right. I would try right now to just KEEP finding stuff to do. Until that perfect thing like a hobby clicks and you find yourself loving something. Force yourself to do something if you have to. I had been in this funk where I didn't want to hang out with anyone and wanted to just stay home and make an occasional trip out to the MAC counter or to shop. I had to literally force myself and stop canceling plans with an old friend who wanted to reconnect. No matter how much I originally didn't feel like going out, I made myself do it and I ended up enjoying the time I had!
Sometimes I feel as if my low level of motiviation to wanting to do anything fun as a form of self punishment. Like I feel as if I'm not good enough to deserve to be able to go out and do fun things cause I'm a failure, or whatever. It needs to stop though cause it's not a healthy way of thinking of living. Treat yourself every now and then to something nice and fun. Even if it's as simple as sitting down and reading a book or just watching your favorite show. It's the little things that sometimes can mean so much.
Hey hun, I've been meaning to reply to your PM but I have been utterly exhausted.
Again, I seriously can relate very well to your situation. You just don't feel motivated or productive. I felt the exact same way from the time I graduated hs and even now and I just found a job finally last month. I'm also only working parttime about 24 hours a week. I come home and do absolutely NOTHING. I don't clean, do chores or anything at home. I don't have the energy to care about that. So I feel even more unproductive than before.
I think your in a rut right now. We just sometimes get into the funk of something and it's hard to get out. You'll get out of it when the time is right. I would try right now to just KEEP finding stuff to do. Until that perfect thing like a hobby clicks and you find yourself loving something. Force yourself to do something if you have to. I had been in this funk where I didn't want to hang out with anyone and wanted to just stay home and make an occasional trip out to the MAC counter or to shop. I had to literally force myself and stop canceling plans with an old friend who wanted to reconnect. No matter how much I originally didn't feel like going out, I made myself do it and I ended up enjoying the time I had!
Sometimes I feel as if my low level of motiviation to wanting to do anything fun as a form of self punishment. Like I feel as if I'm not good enough to deserve to be able to go out and do fun things cause I'm a failure, or whatever. It needs to stop though cause it's not a healthy way of thinking of living. Treat yourself every now and then to something nice and fun. Even if it's as simple as sitting down and reading a book or just watching your favorite show. It's the little things that sometimes can mean so much.
X4biddenxLustX
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I didn't want to take over this thread with a super long post....so I'll PM you tomorrow hun to talk to you more!
I didn't want to take over this thread with a super long post....so I'll PM you tomorrow hun to talk to you more!
mmmakeup
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
A phrase my Mum taught me when I was feeling like this was "Motivation follows action".
Its so true.
Just make your self do something, even if its only for 5 minutes. Then at least you'll have given it a try and will have gained a sense of acheivement. More often than not, you find that 5 minutes passes quickly and you've just spent half an hour being productive. Its an awesome feeling, makes such a change from hating yourself for doing nothing all day.
Setting yourself little targets can help too. For example, if you struggle to get up in the morning because you feel like there's no point, make it your goal to get up at 8am everyday for a week. Stock up on yummy shower gels so you can jump into the shower as soon as you get up, giving you something to look forward to. Beginning the day by acheiving your goal will make you feel so much more positive and motivated, and you will find you gradually do more and more until one day you stop and think, "Hey I've been feeling pretty darn good for a while now. When did that happen? I like this feeling!"
Feel free to PM me if you think I might be able to help at all
A phrase my Mum taught me when I was feeling like this was "Motivation follows action".
Its so true.
Just make your self do something, even if its only for 5 minutes. Then at least you'll have given it a try and will have gained a sense of acheivement. More often than not, you find that 5 minutes passes quickly and you've just spent half an hour being productive. Its an awesome feeling, makes such a change from hating yourself for doing nothing all day.
Setting yourself little targets can help too. For example, if you struggle to get up in the morning because you feel like there's no point, make it your goal to get up at 8am everyday for a week. Stock up on yummy shower gels so you can jump into the shower as soon as you get up, giving you something to look forward to. Beginning the day by acheiving your goal will make you feel so much more positive and motivated, and you will find you gradually do more and more until one day you stop and think, "Hey I've been feeling pretty darn good for a while now. When did that happen? I like this feeling!"
Feel free to PM me if you think I might be able to help at all
SparklingWaves
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
Please don't be so hard on yourself. You may just not have found your passion. Have you taken one of those little tests to see what you are really interested in as far as careers? If not, it could help you find your strengths and point you in a new direction.
I have a really good friend that was told by her elder that she had to go to college or she would fail in life. Well, that lady was extremely artistic and didn't go to college. She works as an artist and loves her job. She is so happy in what she does.
My point in saying this is that you have gift(s) too. You need to look deeper and uncover your own unique gift(s) and find a way to express it. It may be in your future occupation or a hobby.
Please don't be so hard on yourself. You may just not have found your passion. Have you taken one of those little tests to see what you are really interested in as far as careers? If not, it could help you find your strengths and point you in a new direction.
I have a really good friend that was told by her elder that she had to go to college or she would fail in life. Well, that lady was extremely artistic and didn't go to college. She works as an artist and loves her job. She is so happy in what she does.
My point in saying this is that you have gift(s) too. You need to look deeper and uncover your own unique gift(s) and find a way to express it. It may be in your future occupation or a hobby.
mmmakeup
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
One more thing: exercise helps a LOT, all those endorphins give you a natural high.
A few months ago, when I was in quite a bad state, I took up an ashtanga yoga class with a friend. Its not just sitting quietly breathing, its very active and you work up a proper sweat. The feeling you get after a class is just amazing. Like you've worked really hard, and yet are refreshed and relaxed. I think blissful sums it up. It *almost* better than that 'after glow' feeling but sssh don't tell my boyfriend!
So that feeling was almost like my own natural medication. I would really look forward to the classes (and back then I never looked forward to ANYTHING), it would keep me going throughout the week.
Why not try enrolling in an exercise class? It'll help give structure to your week, give you a natural high, and its a great way to meet some new people.
Good luck x
One more thing: exercise helps a LOT, all those endorphins give you a natural high.
A few months ago, when I was in quite a bad state, I took up an ashtanga yoga class with a friend. Its not just sitting quietly breathing, its very active and you work up a proper sweat. The feeling you get after a class is just amazing. Like you've worked really hard, and yet are refreshed and relaxed. I think blissful sums it up. It *almost* better than that 'after glow' feeling but sssh don't tell my boyfriend!
So that feeling was almost like my own natural medication. I would really look forward to the classes (and back then I never looked forward to ANYTHING), it would keep me going throughout the week.
Why not try enrolling in an exercise class? It'll help give structure to your week, give you a natural high, and its a great way to meet some new people.
Good luck x
mindlessgapgirl
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
when i read this, it reminded me of exactly how i used to feel...on and off for the past 9 years, sometimes all i want to do is sleep for days. have you gone to see a doctor at all? I am on my third try with an antidepressant and it has really helped - but when i dont take it, i definitely feel myself slipping back into that feeling where i have no ambition, feel hopeless and have a lack of direction in my life...another thing that really helps me is snuggling with my cats (as cheesy as that sounds!). pets are great to cheer you up, if you are able to have one.
do you feel this way year round, or could it be a seasonal thing? maybe try one of those lights from the drugstore that are supposed to replicate sunlight - for people who get sad and depressed in the winter.
hopefully you start to feel better soon
when i read this, it reminded me of exactly how i used to feel...on and off for the past 9 years, sometimes all i want to do is sleep for days. have you gone to see a doctor at all? I am on my third try with an antidepressant and it has really helped - but when i dont take it, i definitely feel myself slipping back into that feeling where i have no ambition, feel hopeless and have a lack of direction in my life...another thing that really helps me is snuggling with my cats (as cheesy as that sounds!). pets are great to cheer you up, if you are able to have one.
do you feel this way year round, or could it be a seasonal thing? maybe try one of those lights from the drugstore that are supposed to replicate sunlight - for people who get sad and depressed in the winter.
hopefully you start to feel better soon
Mizz.Coppertone
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I agree with exercise helping. I get like you do too. Exercise does not cure all my probs but trust me I feel better when I keep up with it. I really suggest getting some good self help books about life,success,and finding urself.
I agree with exercise helping. I get like you do too. Exercise does not cure all my probs but trust me I feel better when I keep up with it. I really suggest getting some good self help books about life,success,and finding urself.
mmmakeup
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I just thought of one more thing to add... if you're on birth control it might be worth stopping it to see if that's the cause.
Last summer I had a progesterone implant and it completely ruined my life, I haven't been the same since.
So if you are on BC, check to see if it correlates with your mood. I didn't notice at first because it was a gradual change and the fact that it could be a cause just didn't occur to me.
I just thought of one more thing to add... if you're on birth control it might be worth stopping it to see if that's the cause.
Last summer I had a progesterone implant and it completely ruined my life, I haven't been the same since.
So if you are on BC, check to see if it correlates with your mood. I didn't notice at first because it was a gradual change and the fact that it could be a cause just didn't occur to me.
Tahti
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
Poor you! ;( *hugs*
I was in a very similar situation like yours, I quit college midway through the year because of depression and spent 2 months sitting at home, completely lethargic and sad.
I was diagnosed as having bi-polar disorder, so I can't really control where my moods will go (I don't like taking meds for it cause they sap my creativity) so I can't really offer you advice on it, just my empathy and a virtual hug cause I know how it feels! <3
Poor you! ;( *hugs*
I was in a very similar situation like yours, I quit college midway through the year because of depression and spent 2 months sitting at home, completely lethargic and sad.
I was diagnosed as having bi-polar disorder, so I can't really control where my moods will go (I don't like taking meds for it cause they sap my creativity) so I can't really offer you advice on it, just my empathy and a virtual hug cause I know how it feels! <3
kaliraksha
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I've been there- 100%. Just completely unmotivated, no direction, going out to run an errand in those days use to make me tired just because it seemed like a super busy day... like going to pay a parking ticket would be this ridiculous task.
I agree with the exercise, definitely. Also look into reading for pleasure, or even self help books. Gives you an excuse to visit the library, etc. See if you can work a few more hours. Give community college a shot... get the basics out of the way... and only take 1 or 2 classes at a time so you can concentrate on gaining routine.
I learned one thing in all my time of lethargy, depression and pity... I spent way more energy being upset about it than actually doing something to fix it. Take some time to look at your life and what you want to change. If you don't like something, go back the old fashioned way and make a goal and steps to reach that goal and get to it. You don't have to have all the answers now.. you don't have to know what you want to do... some people are in there 40s and 50s and still don't know, but I think the point is you put yourself out there to experience life and make mistakes and grow... even if it's you realize "this is NOT for me", I think it's better than "I have no idea what I want."
I hope it gets better and don't completely rule out getting help from a therapist... sometimes it's just the most efficient thing to do and there is nothing wrong with asking for help.
I've been there- 100%. Just completely unmotivated, no direction, going out to run an errand in those days use to make me tired just because it seemed like a super busy day... like going to pay a parking ticket would be this ridiculous task.
I agree with the exercise, definitely. Also look into reading for pleasure, or even self help books. Gives you an excuse to visit the library, etc. See if you can work a few more hours. Give community college a shot... get the basics out of the way... and only take 1 or 2 classes at a time so you can concentrate on gaining routine.
I learned one thing in all my time of lethargy, depression and pity... I spent way more energy being upset about it than actually doing something to fix it. Take some time to look at your life and what you want to change. If you don't like something, go back the old fashioned way and make a goal and steps to reach that goal and get to it. You don't have to have all the answers now.. you don't have to know what you want to do... some people are in there 40s and 50s and still don't know, but I think the point is you put yourself out there to experience life and make mistakes and grow... even if it's you realize "this is NOT for me", I think it's better than "I have no idea what I want."
I hope it gets better and don't completely rule out getting help from a therapist... sometimes it's just the most efficient thing to do and there is nothing wrong with asking for help.
BEA2LS
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
i understand, depression is what took me out of college. the sad thing is that i really very smart and i am stuck in this dead end job that i hate now. i wanna go back to school and be a teacher. but it brings me down so badly to know that i could have been a teacher by now and since i am working and have bills, it will take me so long to finish.
i just wish i went back or pushed myself harder. i do not have words of advice but just wanted to say i understand.
i understand, depression is what took me out of college. the sad thing is that i really very smart and i am stuck in this dead end job that i hate now. i wanna go back to school and be a teacher. but it brings me down so badly to know that i could have been a teacher by now and since i am working and have bills, it will take me so long to finish.
i just wish i went back or pushed myself harder. i do not have words of advice but just wanted to say i understand.
leenybeeny
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
I have been there too... and I found that action does lead to becoming more motivated to do more as others have said. When I accomplish something small, like going to the gym, or organizing my room.. it makes me more motivated to keep going and go onto other things.
Also, I found that surrounding myself with positive people really helps. I am very shy and I tend to surround myself with outgoing people because they help me to break out of my shell. There are times when people are so positive, you just want to smack them
but all in all it's better than being around people who will bring you further down.
I have been there too... and I found that action does lead to becoming more motivated to do more as others have said. When I accomplish something small, like going to the gym, or organizing my room.. it makes me more motivated to keep going and go onto other things.
Also, I found that surrounding myself with positive people really helps. I am very shy and I tend to surround myself with outgoing people because they help me to break out of my shell. There are times when people are so positive, you just want to smack them
SparklingWaves
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
Absolutely agree with suggestions about exercise. In addition, nutrition plays a huge impact as well.
Stay away from high fructose corn syrup and artificial sweeteners. They are in so many things now. Check those ingredients.
If you feel your depression is not responding to changes with diet and exercise, I would consult a physician for a check up.
Absolutely agree with suggestions about exercise. In addition, nutrition plays a huge impact as well.
Stay away from high fructose corn syrup and artificial sweeteners. They are in so many things now. Check those ingredients.
If you feel your depression is not responding to changes with diet and exercise, I would consult a physician for a check up.
kaliraksha
Well-known member
Re: What am I doing? I don't know.
So, I was looking on Craigslist for a job, and I realize you're not in my city but I was thinking maybe this is something that would lift your spirits... find an internship in fashion. You don't have to make it a career, but doing something you enjoy and you're good at can be so uplifting and great for your self esteem. I would even work for little or no pay if it was only a few hours a week because it might pay you in other ways in your life. You don't have to work for a high fashion designer, but there are small start up companies that need help and you will probably get more input, like this ad I saw that reminded me of you:
Part-time Fashion Stylists
So, I was looking on Craigslist for a job, and I realize you're not in my city but I was thinking maybe this is something that would lift your spirits... find an internship in fashion. You don't have to make it a career, but doing something you enjoy and you're good at can be so uplifting and great for your self esteem. I would even work for little or no pay if it was only a few hours a week because it might pay you in other ways in your life. You don't have to work for a high fashion designer, but there are small start up companies that need help and you will probably get more input, like this ad I saw that reminded me of you:
Part-time Fashion Stylists
