Sex after giving birth
- Thread starter glamdoll
- Start date
*Stargazer*
Well-known member
Are you breastfeeding?
*Stargazer*
Well-known member
Ok, then that rules out a potential cause. I get all jacked up hormonally from breastfeeding and that affects my libido and my ability to umm, self lube, if you know what I mean.
So you might have a hormone imbalance caused by pregnancy. Because pregnancy changes your body in so many ways, all kinds of things get messed up. The best thing you could do is go to your OBGYN and say, this is what is wrong and I'd like to have my hormone levels checked. It may be the cause of your problem. You might want to find a female GYN. I've noticed they tend to be more willing to listen about stuff like this.
It could also just be the typical stresses of having a new baby. Whatever it is, as far as I can tell from everyone I know and everything I read, it is TOTALLY normal and really common. I sometimes wonder if our bodies instinctively shy away from intercourse again so soon after having babies to prevent us from having another one so quickly after. If that makes sense.
Hang in there! I know how rough it can be, but we are here for you!
So you might have a hormone imbalance caused by pregnancy. Because pregnancy changes your body in so many ways, all kinds of things get messed up. The best thing you could do is go to your OBGYN and say, this is what is wrong and I'd like to have my hormone levels checked. It may be the cause of your problem. You might want to find a female GYN. I've noticed they tend to be more willing to listen about stuff like this.
It could also just be the typical stresses of having a new baby. Whatever it is, as far as I can tell from everyone I know and everything I read, it is TOTALLY normal and really common. I sometimes wonder if our bodies instinctively shy away from intercourse again so soon after having babies to prevent us from having another one so quickly after. If that makes sense.
Hang in there! I know how rough it can be, but we are here for you!
glamdoll
Well-known member
Yeah I will do that..
I have a female OBGYN but the thing is shes been the worst doctor Ive had! I dont think she is confortable w teen pregnancy cus I just felt her so cold and not the patient doctor bond..
I dont feel confortable askin her anything..
she seldomly held eye contact with me..
I dunno..
it just doesnt feel right with her..
when I was givin birth she came in and broke my water..
she told me I was gonna be induced on the 12 of july
but I had to go to some lab she sent me too. and they said my
blood pressure was too high. and they induced my that same night
so nothign would happen to my baby
and it ended up being that the cord was gttin wrapped around his neck the doctor told me but it was loose..
she didnt even deliver me.. she left..
and she called me a "big baby" like if i told the lady to have me induced that night!
shes just not the best..
I have a female OBGYN but the thing is shes been the worst doctor Ive had! I dont think she is confortable w teen pregnancy cus I just felt her so cold and not the patient doctor bond..
I dont feel confortable askin her anything..
she seldomly held eye contact with me..
I dunno..
it just doesnt feel right with her..
when I was givin birth she came in and broke my water..
she told me I was gonna be induced on the 12 of july
but I had to go to some lab she sent me too. and they said my
blood pressure was too high. and they induced my that same night
so nothign would happen to my baby
and it ended up being that the cord was gttin wrapped around his neck the doctor told me but it was loose..
she didnt even deliver me.. she left..
and she called me a "big baby" like if i told the lady to have me induced that night!
shes just not the best..
franimal
Well-known member
get a new OBGYN!!! seriously, she should not be making you feel that way. I think a lot of new mothers are just tired and have put so much time into their children that they dont always have a lot of energy for themselves or other people like husbands. Maybe you two could try getting away together for a few hours and maybe spark something. It could also be hormones.
glamdoll
Well-known member
I think it might be the hormones too...
sometimes I have this big burst of energy and just really wanna have sex.. then sometimes i dont even wanna think about it
and today I just busted out in tears and felt like no one loved me when thats not infact true..
Yeah I havent gone back to her
Im gonna look for another one then
its just that my insurance is weird..
hmos
sometimes I have this big burst of energy and just really wanna have sex.. then sometimes i dont even wanna think about it
and today I just busted out in tears and felt like no one loved me when thats not infact true..
Yeah I havent gone back to her
Im gonna look for another one then
its just that my insurance is weird..
hmos
mzcelaneous
Well-known member
It's the hormones.
I went through the.same. thing.
Get a new OBGYN, talk to her, and she will help you.
I went through the.same. thing.
Get a new OBGYN, talk to her, and she will help you.
~LadyLocks~
Well-known member
Quote:
OMG! That makes so much sense. I've been having this same problem ever since I've had my daughter and she's almost 2. I haven't been the same sexually since I had her and I feel bad for my fiance because I know he has his needs. I breastfed for 6 months so maybe that's the cause of all this.
Quote:
This makes sense as well. I had the worst pregnancy and labor ever! Sometimes I think my body is tramatized from the whole expirence and rejects the very thing that started it all lol. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. Maybe I'm not a freak afterall lol. I'm glad there's a solution because I really do want to get back to my old self again!
Originally Posted by Ladybug10678
Ok, then that rules out a potential cause. I get all jacked up hormonally from breastfeeding and that affects my libido and my ability to umm, self lube, if you know what I mean. So you might have a hormone imbalance caused by pregnancy. Because pregnancy changes your body in so many ways, all kinds of things get messed up. The best thing you could do is go to your OBGYN and say, this is what is wrong and I'd like to have my hormone levels checked. It may be the cause of your problem. You might want to find a female GYN. I've noticed they tend to be more willing to listen about stuff like this. |
OMG! That makes so much sense. I've been having this same problem ever since I've had my daughter and she's almost 2. I haven't been the same sexually since I had her and I feel bad for my fiance because I know he has his needs. I breastfed for 6 months so maybe that's the cause of all this.
Quote:
| Originally Posted by Ladybug10678
It could also just be the typical stresses of having a new baby. Whatever it is, as far as I can tell from everyone I know and everything I read, it is TOTALLY normal and really common. I sometimes wonder if our bodies instinctively shy away from intercourse again so soon after having babies to prevent us from having another one so quickly after. If that makes sense. |
This makes sense as well. I had the worst pregnancy and labor ever! Sometimes I think my body is tramatized from the whole expirence and rejects the very thing that started it all lol. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. Maybe I'm not a freak afterall lol. I'm glad there's a solution because I really do want to get back to my old self again!
glamdoll
Well-known member
OMG me too! I asked a few of my friends and 2 of them admitted that they dont enjoy sex and feel forced to it pretty much cus they dont want to hurt their partners!
Im glad theres ppl I can talk to!
its so frustrating.. the one friend I told first was all like
" that never happens to me.. i love sex.. i think its just you.. ur weird"
so I didnt say anything again..
but yea thank you guys and I will get a new OBGYN
does anyone know anything about IUD?
do they work?
Im glad theres ppl I can talk to!
its so frustrating.. the one friend I told first was all like
" that never happens to me.. i love sex.. i think its just you.. ur weird"
so I didnt say anything again..
but yea thank you guys and I will get a new OBGYN
does anyone know anything about IUD?
do they work?
macslut
Well-known member
Ok I have no children beyond a honorary nephew and really my only job there is to give a bottle once in a while, change a couple of diapers, give lots of cuddles and kisses and spoil freakin completely rotten.
I think maybe you should take some of the pressure off and just focus on bonding with your husband. Enjoy being physically close to him. If you are concentrating on the "happy ending", then it will never come (no pun intended). And remember, God allowed someone to invent KY for a reason.
And in the meantime, find a new doctor and get some bloodwork done. And remember your Kegals.
I think maybe you should take some of the pressure off and just focus on bonding with your husband. Enjoy being physically close to him. If you are concentrating on the "happy ending", then it will never come (no pun intended). And remember, God allowed someone to invent KY for a reason.
And in the meantime, find a new doctor and get some bloodwork done. And remember your Kegals.
XsMom21
Well-known member
I was a lot like that when I had my son. After the initial burst of "super-mommy" energy, I was totally not into, well, anything. My problem ultimately ended up being Postpartum depression. I had suffered from some anxiety before the pregnancy, none during, and a few months after, I had a panic attack every time a plane flew overhead (and that sucked cause we lived next to Langley Air Force Base and I'm scared of planes). My doctor put me on some Paxil to control the anxiety and I got back to myself... for the most part.
I still am not AS into sex as I used to be, but we have a healthy sex life, or at least as much as we can with a two-year old running around. I had 40+ stitches with my episiotomy, but that doesn't seem to be effecting me now.... If you're down, or you feel tired all the time, and have FREQUENT crying episodes (some are normal because of the hormones) I'd talk to your regular doctor about some sort of treatment. The good news is, if it's postpartum, it's not stated in stone that you will be on meds forever. I've been on about two years and have just started weening off.
HTH.
I still am not AS into sex as I used to be, but we have a healthy sex life, or at least as much as we can with a two-year old running around. I had 40+ stitches with my episiotomy, but that doesn't seem to be effecting me now.... If you're down, or you feel tired all the time, and have FREQUENT crying episodes (some are normal because of the hormones) I'd talk to your regular doctor about some sort of treatment. The good news is, if it's postpartum, it's not stated in stone that you will be on meds forever. I've been on about two years and have just started weening off.
Raerae
Well-known member
Quote:
Heh... How about wanting to have it when you can't... And when when you get to a point during the day when you can, your not into it anymore lol...
Quote:
One of my close friends has one, and she's been with her BF for several years using that method of BC, and she's never been pregnant.
I'll give you the same generic response, talk to your OBGYN lol..
| Originally Posted by glamdoll
OMG me too! I asked a few of my friends and 2 of them admitted that they dont enjoy sex and feel forced to it pretty much cus they dont want to hurt their partners! |
Heh... How about wanting to have it when you can't... And when when you get to a point during the day when you can, your not into it anymore lol...
Quote:
| does anyone know anything about IUD? do they work? |
One of my close friends has one, and she's been with her BF for several years using that method of BC, and she's never been pregnant.
I'll give you the same generic response, talk to your OBGYN lol..
panda0410
Well-known member
Quote:
Not necessarily the first choice, but not necessarily the worst choice either. I have had two IUDs, and neither failed as a contraceptive - they are in fact VERY effective. The first I had was great - had it for four years, the second didnt take - after you have had a number of children the cervix isnt as patent and it can be expelled either fully or partially, my second was expelled. Most drs wont rec IUDs for young girls and often women who have only had one child will be rejected as a candidate for an IUD as well. They do come with risks too - a perforated uterus and infection are some of the risks associated with IUDs.
They are painless, you cant feel them, but they do need to be inserted correctly - if the string (more like fishing line kinda) on the bottom (which hangs through the cervix for placement) is cut too short they can be sharp and spike hubby - and believe me, he wont like that! It would need to be replaced. They are also not cheap - well at least here anyway, but if you think about what the cost of other contraceptives are you may well save money as the IUDs last for 4 years before they need replacement. You would absolutely need to talk to your OB for advice to see if this particular contraceptive is right for you - many people are not suitable candidates for this device for various reasons.
| Originally Posted by glamdoll
does anyone know anything about IUD? do they work? |
Not necessarily the first choice, but not necessarily the worst choice either. I have had two IUDs, and neither failed as a contraceptive - they are in fact VERY effective. The first I had was great - had it for four years, the second didnt take - after you have had a number of children the cervix isnt as patent and it can be expelled either fully or partially, my second was expelled. Most drs wont rec IUDs for young girls and often women who have only had one child will be rejected as a candidate for an IUD as well. They do come with risks too - a perforated uterus and infection are some of the risks associated with IUDs.
They are painless, you cant feel them, but they do need to be inserted correctly - if the string (more like fishing line kinda) on the bottom (which hangs through the cervix for placement) is cut too short they can be sharp and spike hubby - and believe me, he wont like that! It would need to be replaced. They are also not cheap - well at least here anyway, but if you think about what the cost of other contraceptives are you may well save money as the IUDs last for 4 years before they need replacement. You would absolutely need to talk to your OB for advice to see if this particular contraceptive is right for you - many people are not suitable candidates for this device for various reasons.
