So upset ARG!

[Pink_minx]

Im so mad at my biological father! I never talk to him unless "I" call him! He expects me to come over and visit him but he never calls me about that information. I got my permit and I want a car, and it doesnt have to be NEW Im totally fine with a use one just as long as it works and I can practice driving on it since my other dad wont let me drive the company car which I understand. I asked if he can buy me a used car and he laughs and was like "oh no no no I will pay half for it". Im like what! at least buy me a freakin used car I mean I never asked him anything more than that. He never been there for me, I mean my mom and other dad has been taking care of me since i was 4. Fed me bought me clothes bought school supplies took me to the doctor, dentist, got braces, payed for every single thing I wanted or needed. All i got from him was $100 child support a month and sometimes not even that, we used that for groceries when my family didnt have much.

Im so upset, last time I saw him he had a brand new car, like that could of been mine lol. But anyways Im upset and a kind of hurt by it when he laughed at me bout buying me a USED car!. Oh wells

​

 

[pumpkincat210]

You are lucky he'll pay half of it. My parents never got me a car and the car my husband i have now is a POS, but we paid for it out of our tax money.

 

[Pink_minx]

I guess your right if he will pay half of it, but i was just thinking its the least he can do, since he never done anything for me.

 

[souraznhunnie]

I don't think you should be mad just because your real father won't buy you a car. I think your parents have spoiled you way too much by getting you everything you wanted so you think it's okay for you to get whatever you want. Now I don't know how old you are, but you can't expect your parents do get and do everything for you all the time. You're going to have to learn to grow up, be independent and take care of yourself sooner or later.

 

[Dreamergirl3]

I think you have a right to be bitter towards him overall, but not -so- much that he wont buy you a car...be greatful hes even going to pay half! But I know what you mean, he wasn't really there for you and I dont know what you went through growing up but I'm sure you guys don't have the best relationship. If theres one thing I don't appreciate in this world its parents that arent there for their children. I hope everythin works out for you though!

 

[joytheobscure]

I think you have a right to feel how you feel. I suppose if he's driving a new car he has payments and expenses too... If he only pays $100 a month than his income must not be very high or your mom never tried to get it raised. There are a lot of people driving new cars that can't afford them... I hope you can get something worked out between both sets of parents to help get you wheels. Me wanting to get a job helped my parents help me get a car when I was 17. I also got a car later than most of my classmates.

 

[Isis]

I totally understand the whole car issue thing. I remember my first car... ok so it was the family van at the time :roll: and I tried to destroy it every chance I got. But that was years ago. My parents wanted me to first keep a good driving record, work, gain some responsibility, etc before having one of my own. I did always have something to drive, but only one which was really my own, that my aunt had lent me 7K to buy. Unfortunatelly it was stollen just over a year later. My dad really wanted to buy me another (because he knew how importaint that car was to me. he and I love cars.) but my mother put her foot down on that one which pissed me off no end b/c my dad and I had already gone shopping for one. So, then it was back to borrowing my mom's car again.
Until this summer I havn't had a car to call my own for YEARS and btw I'm 25 now to give you an idea of how long it's been for me. My mother totally surprised me with a new car as a graduation present from school and I am forever greatful! She actually let me pick out what I wanted! After what had happened before I never thought she would do that for me.

I think my point here is, just to be patient, you'll get one. Not everyone gets their first car right when they get their permit or license.

 

[heenx0x0]

You have a right to feel that because he's your father he should do this ONE thing for you. It sounds like he hasn't done much for you in the past and you wanting this ISN'T you being spoiled, but you wanting to be able to depend on your dad for something. There's nothing wrong with that! That's what parents are supposed to do. He's not doing you a favor, he's your dad for Christ's sakes! He's gotten off easy in the past and hasn't done much at all. You should talk to him and let him know how much this means to you and how it would mean a lot if he could do this for you because your his daughter and you need it. I know what it feels like to have a father you can't really depend on financially or for anything else. Some fathers really need to start stepping up to the plate and not only doing what the courts tell them they have to but go above and beyond just that because it's the right thing to do! Hope you work things out with him and he steps up the plate and does the right thing!

 

[Pink_minx]

thanks for some of you girls for understanding, Im not trying to be bratty and Im not spoiled. Its the LEAST he can do for me. All the things my mom and my dad well hes my step dad but I call him my dad cause he is my real dad taking care of me since I was 4. My mom jokes and tells me my biological dad is just a sperm doner lol. But buying a used car or even a new one doesnt add up for all the years he missed of me as a child and growing up into a young woman. I have the right and shouldnt feel spoiled about asking him for this. Just because he is done paying child support doesnt mean he should stop being responsible for me. Like i said its the LEAST he can do I ask for nothing more.

I will be patient I know he wont buy me a car. And I know I will get one someday. But just the tone of voice like "hell no!" and his laugh made me really angry from there i wanted to tell him how I really feel.
I will get over it and move on about this lil situation I just needed to let it out cause it made me mad.

 

[pumpkincat210]

I'm sorry if i made you feel bad. I guess i'm still bitter because I don't have a better car, lol. and yeah, that's wrong that he wasn't there for you. Its really hard these days to not have a car and then be expected to pay for it, especially if you are in school. I hope you get one soon and me too for that matter.

 

[Pink_minx]

its ok, we are all feeling bitter about something hehe. I would be bitter too if I didnt get a nicer car.

 

[niecypiecy]

Sorry but I think you should count your lucky stars that he is paying half. I couldn't even get my Dad to cosign a loan for my first car let alone pay anything toward it!

 

[souraznhunnie]

okay, i'm sorry for calling you spoiled but i guess i'm just speaking from my point of view. i never got a car from any of my parents growing up. i never expected getting a car right when i got my license...i always had to take the bus to work and all that. i DO understand where you're coming from because my MOM hasn't been there for me when i was growing up. she and my dad divorced and i basically was raised by my dad but then moved in with my mom (because of some drama)....but you know my mom would never buy me a car and i don't expect her to buy me a car. she wouldn't even cosign a car for me...and let me tell u, it IS a big expensefor parents to buy a car for you especially when they can't afford it. cars are expensive, even if they are used cars. and WOW, your dad's actually willing to pay half of the car? that's GREAT! you shouldn't try to take advantage of your parents' generousity.

just the way you were saying how your parents gave you everything u wanted, let me tell u, then you were and are lucky that they gave you whatever you asked for....because i know i didn't get the things that i wanted when i was growing up...that has just taught me to work hard to get what i want for myself and not always have to depend on my parents all the time.

 

[blueyedlady87]

What a SOB. Sounds like my real dad. Since my step-dad has $$ he doesnt think he needs to pay child support or anything. It pisses me off. He never makes an effort to see me, it's always me calling him. And I only see him to fufill my obligation. I hate it. As it is I see him once a month. It just pisses me off b/c he says he doesnt have enough $ to give me any (and to go get it from my stepdad), but then I see my step-sister w/ a (used) car and gas money to go wherever she wants. And I'm like, WTF?? But it doesn't really matter, as soon as I'm 18, I'll have as little contact as possible. He will regret being such a stupid dad!! It just sux b/c I already dread having to decide who to walk me down the aisle, my 'real' dad, or my stepdad who i consider my dad. (And i dont even have a bf!!) So many dads out there suck. but my advice to other girls is that you don't need a dad!! My mom was an amazing single mom, who did a great job raising me and my sister.

Ok, my rant is over. Sorry.

 

[blueyedlady87]

Quote:

Originally Posted by souraznhunnie I don't think you should be mad just because your real father won't buy you a car. I think your parents have spoiled you way too much by getting you everything you wanted so you think it's okay for you to get whatever you want. Now I don't know how old you are, but you can't expect your parents do get and do everything for you all the time. You're going to have to learn to grow up, be independent and take care of yourself sooner or later.

My mom gave me her car cuz my stepdad bought her a truck. I don't think I'm spoiled. Theres no way I can get a job right now, so what am I supposed to do?? Walk to school? Too far, not an option. I get so tired of some adults for thinking that just b/cause a kid has a decent car they're spoiled. No offense or anything, just my opinion. And if all her dad is paying is $100 a month in support and he's driving an new car, he should at least get her a used car. Just my 2 cents.

 

[LivinginPink]

Sorry but people like you piss me off. I had to work my @ss for my car (which, was just trashed by some f'nut who wanted to taked it). You should be thankful you had someone who was willing to help you out. Be thankful for what you have.

 

[leppy]

I agree that your Dad sucks, but not that he should buy you a car. If you're old enough to be driving you're old enough to buy your own.. on top of that, as a young adult, you shouldn't be expecting anyone to buy you that kind of thing, if anything at all.

Barbie.. if your parents were in a position to give you a car then you're lucky, and good for them for being so generous to you. If you think its no big deal and not being spoiled at all though, you need a reality check and to take a good look at the world at large and how little other people have. I'm not saying you're a rotten brat because you were fortunate to get a car from your parents, not at all, but at least realize how lucky you are.

I remember being a teenager and thinking how clueless adults were and how unfair their judgements were. Well BS. Sorry but thats your teenage perspective talking, which is appropriate if you are a teenager, so I don't really mean it as a criticism. You don't realize what you have yet, and yes, you are spoiled, but thats not such a bad thing. In a perfect world all kids would be able to be a little spoiled by their parents in some way or another.

Pink: What your father owes you is time & to have taken better care of you as a child. Hes messed that up, and that is a damn shame. Buying you crap now will not make up for it and is not owed to you as a result of his shitty behaviour before. The least he could do is try to be a better father to you in the future. Buying you a car has got nothing to do with that, and wouldn't be a wise decision even if he could afford it imo.

If you were my kid, regardless of whether I was the best parent ever or totally lacking as a parent, if you took an attitude that buying you something was "the least I could do", you'd get JACK from me let me tell you. In fact you even ASKING me to do something like that would piss me off.

 

[blueyedlady87]

Barbie.. if your parents were in a position to give you a car then you're lucky, and good for them for being so generous to you. If you think its no big deal and not being spoiled at all though, you need a reality check and to take a good look at the world at large and how little other people have. I'm not saying you're a rotten brat because you were fortunate to get a car from your parents, not at all, but at least realize how lucky you are.

yes, i know I'm very lucky to have a car, and I'm very appreciative. Maybe because of where I grew up I don't see getting a car when your 16 as anything out of the ordinary. It's hard for me b/c at school alot of kids have BMWs and Mercedes, and as much as I know they are going to have a tough time later on, I still get jealous. and yes compared to 3rd world countries I'm lucky, but in America and especially where I live, I'm just average when it comes to material things. i had to have a car b/c my parents can't take me to school and it's too far to walk. It's not like I even have a nice car... it's a 98 Camry. Lol!! But persoanlly, I can't see me getting a hand-me-down as some amazing blessing, especially when kids around me are potheads and are failing and their parents are buying them whatever their little rotten heart desires. And no, I don't really compare to myself to third world countries, cuz I'm in America, (as bad it sounds) that doesnt affect me. Please dont think of me as some spoiled, stuck-up bitch. I'm actually very humble compared to the girls I go to school with.

<3

 

[blueyedlady87]

Quote:

Originally Posted by FairladyZ I totally understand the whole car issue thing. I remember my first car... ok so it was the family van at the time :roll: and I tried to destroy it every chance I got. But that was years ago. My parents wanted me to first keep a good driving record, work, gain some responsibility, etc before having one of my own. I did always have something to drive, but only one which was really my own, that my aunt had lent me 7K to buy. Unfortunatelly it was stollen just over a year later. My dad really wanted to buy me another (because he knew how importaint that car was to me. he and I love cars.) but my mother put her foot down on that one which pissed me off no end b/c my dad and I had already gone shopping for one. So, then it was back to borrowing my mom's car again. Until this summer I havn't had a car to call my own for YEARS and btw I'm 25 now to give you an idea of how long it's been for me. My mother totally surprised me with a new car as a graduation present from school and I am forever greatful! She actually let me pick out what I wanted! After what had happened before I never thought she would do that for me. I think my point here is, just to be patient, you'll get one. Not everyone gets their first car right when they get their permit or license.

Nice!!! So what kind of car did you pick out?
When I need/want a new car I have to pay half too.

So I'm saving cuz I want a Acura RL!! Hehe. Until then its my 98 Camry.

 

[Turbokittykat]

Sorry, but you do sound like a brat. Nobody owes you a car, whether they are your father or not. I passed my driving test when I was 17 and always did well at school, (and at 18 left home to go to university), but nobody bought me a car. I didn't have one until I was 28 and I could afford to buy it myself, (and even then it was a second-hand 1.2l tiny little hatchback). It never even crossed my mind to expect my parents to buy a car for me, even though we lived in a remote rural area with almost no public transport. Jeez, talk about spoiled.