Teens 'sexting' sending nude pics...

[xbrookecorex]

Thank you SO much to every one of you! I'm compiling all your stories now and trying to draw out similarities and differences in your attitudes about what happened. I may message a couple of you to ask some further questions, not sure yet.

One follow-up question I have to all of you, especially those who are still currently in highschool: Was this ever something that was discussed in any of your school classes like health or anything? Im curious now that the sexting has become a big thing, if it's going to start being talked about in schools.

I got a bigger response than I had even hoped for so THANK YOU, I will definitely share my final paper in a few weeks if you'd be interested because I couldn't have done a thing without all your openness and willingness to discuss

 

[nanefy]

can I just say OMG!!!

When I was 14 or 15 I hadn't even had my first kiss let alone take naked pictures of myself! What is going on with the next generation and what are we teaching them when they are sending naked pictures of themselves to boyfriends or worse STRANGERS!!!! FFS!

Don't get me wrong I am all about sexual liberation and being comfortable with your body and parents should be more open with their children about sex, but there are limits and with good reason. I mean, for goodness sake, pedophiles don't even need to work hard these days to get pictures and videos of children if boys and girls of 14 and 15 are willingly sending their pictures to everyone.

Growing up myself, I know that people were having under age sex, HOWEVER it was not as rife as it is nowadays and we certainly were NOT swapping nude pictures.

With my up bringing (which wasn't strict but wasn't lenient) I respected myself and my body and only lost my virginity when I was with the right person (who actually turned out not to be the right person, but at 18 years old I was at least an adult and it was in a loving relationship).

It disgusts me nowadays when children's sexual indiscretions are looked upon these days as being a product of being open minded!! That is just so wrong on so many levels.

 

[L1LMAMAJ]

I've never done it before. I never will. I'm too paranoid about it leaking out somewhere and haunting me later in life.

 

[OfficerJenny]

Never discussed in any of my high school classes

and really, I don't care. My pictures have been distributed around the internet and, really, it doesn't bother me one bit o-o

 

[cupcake_x]

I'm homeschooled and although sex is a very open subject and I'm comfortable talking to my mother about it, the actual subject of sexting has never been discussed completely.

 

[florabundance]

Quote:

Originally Posted by OfficerJenny Never discussed in any of my high school classes and really, I don't care. My pictures have been distributed around the internet and, really, it doesn't bother me one bit o-o

that's admirable. i wish i could be that comfortable with my body

 

[nanefy]

I don't think its admirable at all. Donating to charity is admirable, standing up for yourself against all odds is admirable, respecting yourself is admirable, posting naked pictures of yourself online at the age of 15 is disgusting.

Too many adults these days keep their mouths shut in an effort to keep the peace or to not get involved. That's whats wrong with children these days, there is no respect for authority and kids think that they can just do whatever pleases them regardless of the consequences. I'm not going to apologise for anything I have said, because I think its ridiculous that any adult should encourage such behaviour.

I realise that my opinions may not be to everyones taste, but when you weigh up the consequences, they do make sense. Teenage pregnancies are on the increase, as are teenage STI's. We are also living in a society where its easy for pedophiles to gain access to content like this. I can assure you if I had been doing this when I was 15 and my parents had found out, they would have been appalled and I can say in no uncertain terms I would have been severley punished for it.

I am astounded that I seem to be the only person on here who thinks like this. Either I am the only one with these views, or people are too scared to voice their opinions.

God, we have people posting topics about animal cruelty and everyone jumps to defend it, but when we start talking about the welfare of the next generation, everyone is silent. Where are everyone's priorities?

 

[Robby_Raynebow]

As for the subject being talked about in school. We had an assembly about predators and internet safety and our resident trooper who works in the school just tried to scare us. It didnt work. Later that night i was out with a couple and we were all drunk and 3 of us took a pic of us naked and we sent it to a few close friends with the headline "FUCK Trooper Taco". None of us have any regrets for it. It was fun and it didn't get too far.

 

[nanefy]

It doesn't surprise me that, thats your attitude. This is exactly my point - that the youth of today have absolutely no respect for authority and the adults that are there to keep them safe. Do you think the Trooper just decided that he would waste his time by coming to speak to you, or do you think that perhaps he was trying to help? What do you think you acheived by sending out naked pictures of yourself with the headline 'FUCK Trooper Taco'? Its certainly not mature.
Answer me this, if someone outside of your group of friends found your picture, and found out where you lived (because lets face it, thats pretty easily done) and sexually assaulted you, who would be responsible for that? Would it be Trooper Taco? Or would it be your fault? I'm not saying you'd deserve it, not at all, but you have to remember that your actions have consequences, and just because nothing has happened to you yet, it doesn't mean it cant or wont and it won't be because 'Trooper Taco' didn't give a damn.

I'm all prepared for a back lash of comments regarding my attitude towards this, and to be honest I couldn't care less. At least I stand up for what I believe in, and unlike the rest of the empathetic adults I encoutner daily, I will actually say what needs to be said instead of sitting back whilst our society changes for the worse.

At the risk of sounding ancient - when I was a kid, we had respect for those in authority and adults were in charge - nowadays the kids run the show. Its a sad state of affairs when an Adult cannot challenge a childs behaviour due to the risks of either being verbally berrated or worse physically attacked. Lets just be real here, we might be living in a sad state of affairs at present, but there will come a time when my generation will be gone, and it will be your turn to endure the kind of crap that we have to put up with today and you'll have no one to blame but yourself.

 

[OfficerJenny]

I'm not saying it's good that I posted the pictures. Was it a mistake? I guess. But it's something that's happened and I can't really do anything to stop it, so why dwell on it?

EDIT:
Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy At the risk of sounding ancient - when I was a kid, we had respect for those in authority and adults were in charge - nowadays the kids run the show. Its a sad state of affairs when an Adult cannot challenge a childs behaviour due to the risks of either being verbally berrated or worse physically attacked. Lets just be real here, we might be living in a sad state of affairs at present, but there will come a time when my generation will be gone, and it will be your turn to endure the kind of crap that we have to put up with today and you'll have no one to blame but yourself.

I respect people. To me, it doesn't matter what your age is. So, whether you're 65 or 17, I will treat you with the respect you treat me with.

 

[cupcake_x]

Quote:

Originally Posted by florabundance that's admirable. i wish i could be that comfortable with my body

You begin to just not care after awhile. It's embarressing and horrifying, but you get used to it, definitely.


Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy Teenage pregnancies are on the increase, as are teenage STI's. We are also living in a society where its easy for pedophiles to gain access to content like this. I can assure you if I had been doing this when I was 15 and my parents had found out, they would have been appalled and I can say in no uncertain terms I would have been severley punished for it.

I know how to protect myself. I may have made a silly mistake, but I know how to use birth control, I know to get myself tested. I've been in a monogamous relationship for 2 1/2 years and we're still careful.

And believe me, my parents would have punished me severly as well. They're very strict and they don't take kindly to inappropriate behavior.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy I am astounded that I seem to be the only person on here who thinks like this. Either I am the only one with these views, or people are too scared to voice their opinions.

No, you're probably not. I get your point completely, I know what you're saying. But I think people aren't quick to respond negatively to this thread is because a lot of people who really are ashamed and regret what they did will be looking. And to be reminded how stupid of a mistake it can be is not always easy to hear.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy This is exactly my point - that the youth of today have absolutely no respect for authority and the adults that are there to keep them safe. Answer me this, if someone outside of your group of friends found your picture, and found out where you lived (because lets face it, thats pretty easily done) and sexually assaulted you, who would be responsible for that? Would it be Trooper Taco? Or would it be your fault? I'm all prepared for a back lash of comments regarding my attitude towards this, and to be honest I couldn't care less. At least I stand up for what I believe in, and unlike the rest of the empathetic adults I encoutner daily, I will actually say what needs to be said instead of sitting back whilst our society changes for the worse.

How ridiculous to assume youth today doesn't respect authority and their parents/guardians. I'm of Hispanic decent and it's our culture to respect authority and adults- and I do. And it's not even that- a lot of people my age really do respect authority. In fact, the majority probably does but people choose to focus on the ones who are acting out. I've been told by many adults how respectful and mature I am. Engaging in sexual activity at a young age doesn't mean I'm some disrespectful spoiled brat.

And it wouldn't be my fault OR the troopers fault- it would be the person who assaulted me. I'm not spreading my legs saying "Hey everyone! Come rape me!". I'm not asking anyone to assault me.. The man/woman would make the choice to do it, so naturally it would be their fault. I took a picture of my boobs a couple times and sent it to different guys- that's far different from enticing men to rape me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy At the risk of sounding ancient - when I was a kid, we had respect for those in authority and adults were in charge - nowadays the kids run the show. Its a sad state of affairs when an Adult cannot challenge a childs behaviour due to the risks of either being verbally berrated or worse physically attacked. Lets just be real here, we might be living in a sad state of affairs at present, but there will come a time when my generation will be gone, and it will be your turn to endure the kind of crap that we have to put up with today and you'll have no one to blame but yourself.

Now that's just terrible parenting. There's a huge difference between being relaxed with your child and being an open, loving parent and just letting your child walk all over you. Again, I see what you're saying. My mother is a laid back parent, but she would NEVER EVER in her life would accept any form of disrespect, let alone being verbally or physically assaulted. And I plan to do the same with my children. No way will I allow any of that to happen.

So basically what I'm trying to say is:
Quote:

Originally Posted by OfficerJenny I'm not saying it's good that I posted the pictures. Was it a mistake? I guess. But it's something that's happened and I can't really do anything to stop it, so why dwell on it?

Exactly.

And nanefy, I'm not trying to start a flame war and going back and forth. You proved a point and now I'm proving mine.

 

[SparklingWaves]

This is off topic a bit, but I have seen many people that are let's just say much older that would make what the teens are doing look very tame.

I think that would also be great research project.

Good luck to you on your project.

 

[nanefy]

I am not 'assuming' that the youth of today are disrespectful, its a fact - which is not to say that it applies to 100% of that demographic. All kids throughout the ages do things they shouldn't and I am not suggesting that my generation were perfect, but there has been a enormous shift in the way that kids interact with adults and authority. Let me give you some examples, (1) kids abusing service providers i.e. firemen, ambulances, police (this NEVER happened when I was a kid), (2) When I was a child, I knew that if I was being beaten up or harrassed by other kids my age, adults would come to my aid and they would stop the situation, because kids respected their elders, whereas nowadays adults are terrified to intervene due to the severe lack of respect that kids have for their elders, (3) There is now no shame in having STI's or being pregnant and under 16, which sends signals to other kids, that they don't need to worry or be ashamed for being promiscuous. I could go on and on, and whilst you yourself might be a pillar of society that does not mean that your school friend down the road is. All of this stems from the do gooders of the world and the PC brigade. Authorities and parents have had their powers removed and thus we now live in a society where kids have the upper hand.
I think you misunderstood my point about being sexually assaulted. I am not for one minute suggesting that you would be responsible for being sexually assaulted, because ultimately no one forces attackers to do what they do, however surely you can see that posting naked pictures of yourself could be the fuel in the fire, or the one thing that makes someone decide to go that extra step. All I am saying, is that everyones actions have consequences, and while you are in control of your actions, surely it would be better to try and prevent the more sinister consequences if you could.
I also want to point out that while I stand by everything I have said, I would never judge anyone for things they've done in the past, especially if they regretted certain aspects. What gets me angry and riled up is the way some people like to glamourise and condone certain activities which in my eyes (and I would hope everyone elses) are absolutely horrendous.

 

[revinn]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy (3) There is now no shame in having STI's or being pregnant and under 16, which sends signals to other kids, that they don't need to worry or be ashamed for being promiscuous.

No shame in having STI's or getting pregnant? When I was in high school, I saw a girl literally drop out of school because a rumour was passed around that she had gonorrhea. Teenagers are absolutely terrified of STI's, or at least every teenager I've come in contact with.. I used to do sexual health presentations at junior highs, and all the students would shudder and gasp when we mentioned things like chlamydia or herpes. And pregnancy? Just because we support friends or classmates who get pregnant doesn't mean we have any desire to emulate them. We help others in those situations instead of ridiculing them because it's such a difficult thing to go through. Believe me though, in the back of our heads, we're ALL saying, "I'm just glad it's not me." We pity the kids who get "knocked up" and put them into stereotypes; it's not right, but it happens. Girls who get pregnant often get labelled unfairly. So no shame in getting pregant or infected with STI's? Not so much.

I think that was a serious generalization on your part, since many teenagers happen to be pretty informed about the risks and consequences of STI's and teen pregnancy. I'm not trying to discredit your post, I think you made some valid points, but I disagree with that one particular comment.

Back on topic, I've never taken nude pictures of myself, but I have gone on webcam and showed parts of my body. I didn't do it when I was under 18, but I probably would have if the occasion presented itself. I didn't do it for attention or to make the guy like me; it was a turn on to me and it was something exciting and fun. I don't regret it, I don't really feel anything about it. If anyone found out or saw anything, I would definitely be embarassed, but I wouldn't regret it. It was something in my personal life that was between me and another person. If he leaked it, HE would be the one who should be ashamed, not me. I have the utmost trust and respect for him, so I don't think it will ever come to that, but if it does, I suppose I'll have to learn from it and work it out.

 

[cupcake_x]

nanefy, May I ask when you grew up? You look very young in your pictures, but you make it seem like you were growing up in the 1700s

Kids have been saying FU to authority for many many years. The roaring 20s, the 60s and 70s??

 

[nanefy]

You know if you haven't grown up in times different from today, then its difficult for you to comment. I am speaking from experience as I have grown up during times where myself and every kid I knew had respect not only for their parents but for the men and women who are put in the position to make life safer. This means that I can safely comment on todays youth because I have perspective. I can see with my own eyes the differences between my childhood and that of todays younger generation.

I am not going to sit and explain everything I have already but I will say this, although you sit and say that you are scared of STI's and pregnancy and that what I have said previously is a gross generalisation, how can you possibly explain the extreme rise in child pregnancies and STI's? This is not because of a surge in population but due to the changes in attitude of the kids who make up the younger generation. I would NEVER ridicule anyone who has an STI or who finds themselves pregnant at 15 or 16, however I will certainly not sit here and pretend that its OK. How selfish is it that basically a child should give birth to a baby, all for the sake of a bit of fun or something that turns you on? 15 year olds are still children, which is not to say that they are devoid of responsability because they still know right from wrong.

There is one simple question that everyone should ask themselves regardless of their age and that is this:

If you were a parent who had a 15 year old child, how would you feel if you found out they were posting naked pictures of themselves for all to see? If you find yourself thinking that you would not be happy, ask yourself why and then ask yourself why you would then feel its OK for yourself to do it at 15.

 

[OfficerJenny]

I post pictures of myself because I have no respect for adults.

Just because what you see if a bunch of people who don't care for authority, doesn't mean it's what goes on everywhere. Sure, some people are against "the man" but plenty of us know who is here for the benefit of the community.

I posted pictures because I was bored. I'm not insecure. I wasn't depressed. I didn't give out any personal information at all, and in no way would I be in a position to be sexually assaulted.

That being said, I have nothing but respect for the 16 year old girls who are going through high school pregnant. It takes serious guts to be able to do that openly, and the fact that they understand what they did (mistake or not) and are taking responsibility for it is admirable.

 

[nanefy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by OfficerJenny I post pictures of myself because I have no respect for adults. Just because what you see if a bunch of people who don't care for authority, doesn't mean it's what goes on everywhere. Sure, some people are against "the man" but plenty of us know who is here for the benefit of the community. I posted pictures because I was bored. I'm not insecure. I wasn't depressed. I didn't give out any personal information at all, and in no way would I be in a position to be sexually assaulted. That being said, I have nothing but respect for the 16 year old girls who are going through high school pregnant. It takes serious guts to be able to do that openly, and the fact that they understand what they did (mistake or not) and are taking responsibility for it is admirable.

I completely disagree 100%. I do not in any way shape or form think that being pregnant at 15 is admirable. Any idiot can get pregnant, but it takes respect not only for yourself but for the life of an unborn child to NOT get pregnant when you cannot possibly provide for yourself let alone another living human being. I will say that I can understand its hard being pregnant at 15/16 or god forbid even younger, but that does not make it admirable. This is the kind of attitude that I was referring to, the fact that teenagers face no recrimination for their actions and when they have others making them feel like 'way hay, go you for becoming yet another teenage statistic', it then becomes 'just something that happens'.
Also, I only used sexual assault as one example of the negative side of posting such pictures in a public domain and if you think that just because you have not posted personal information that it makes you safe then you are mistaken. Someone who is desperate enough and depraved enough can find out anything about you just by you sitting at your PC.
Also, I will state for the record AGAIN!!! that I did not say ANYWHERE that every single teenager in every part of the world was the same, but having grown up in a different era and currently witnessing the change in attitudes with my very own eyes, I am justified. I am not making uneducated assumptions or simply surmising, I am conveying something that is very much tangible and evident to me today.
I have also never stated that you must have been depressed, attention seeking or anything of that ilk, I never suggested that this was in any way shape or form a result of emotional imbalance, in fact I think my posts have been very clear in stating that this is as a result of the lack of respect that teenagers have in general, whether that be about their bodies or anything else for that matter.
Do you think that back in the 60's, 70's and 80's that schools had to have metal detectors or armed security guards? Also, how often did you hear of scenarios like Colombine? The answer is never or rarely and thats because the Adults at school were in charge and teenagers/kids knew their place.

Also for the record, there is a huge difference between being against the 'man' and having a lack of respect for your elders. One is about the common man standing up for his rights against the pressures of the government and corporation whereas the other is just a lack of respect for no other reason than you dont care.

 

[OfficerJenny]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy I completely disagree 100%. I do not in any way shape or form think that being pregnant at 15 is admirable. Any idiot can get pregnant, but it takes respect not only for yourself but for the life of an unborn child to NOT get pregnant when you cannot possibly provide for yourself let alone another living human being. I will say that I can understand its hard being pregnant at 15/16 or god forbid even younger, but that does not make it admirable. This is the kind of attitude that I was referring to, the fact that teenagers face no recrimination for their actions and when they have others making them feel like 'way hay, go you for becoming yet another teenage statistic', it then becomes 'just something that happens'.

I wasn't saying being pregnant is admirable, I was saying that the girls who go through the pregnancy and have their children throughout all of the ridicule, stereotypes, and reputation bashing are admirable.


Quote:

Also, I only used sexual assault as one example of the negative side of posting such pictures in a public domain and if you think that just because you have not posted personal information that it makes you safe then you are mistaken. Someone who is desperate enough and depraved enough can find out anything about you just by you sitting at your PC.

Oh, I know I'm not safe on the internet as a whole, but on that specific website I am completely safe.

Quote:

I have also never stated that you must have been depressed, attention seeking or anything of that ilk, I never suggested that this was in any way shape or form a result of emotional imbalance, in fact I think my posts have been very clear in stating that this is as a result of the lack of respect that teenagers have in general, whether that be about their bodies or anything else for that matter.

That comment wasn't directed at you, just at the situation in general.


Quote:

Also for the record, there is a huge difference between being against the 'man' and having a lack of respect for your elders. One is about the common man standing up for his rights against the pressures of the government and corporation whereas the other is just a lack of respect for no other reason than you dont care.

I have plenty of respect for people who deserve it, but if you think just because someone's older than me they deserve extra respect, you're wrong.

 

[revinn]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nanefy 15 year olds are still children, which is not to say that they are devoid of responsability because they still know right from wrong.

I agree with that completely. As I said, this is why I went from school to school talking to kids about safe sex. I think it's extremely important to know the risks of sexual intercourse and how quickly your life can change if you fail to protect yourself. I don't think that when you're 15, you're ready to be a parent, but it happens, and if you can choose to raise that child, then I think you're pretty brave. That's accepting responsibility for your choices.

I never said you made a gross generalization, just a generalization. You're saying that all the kids you knew growing up were respectful; well, I well telling you the same thing. The majority of my classmates were extremely intelligent and respectful. Sure, we had some pregnancies and sex scandals at our school, but we learned from them; we learned how not to act, what not to do. It sounds like you grew up with similar kinds of people, so I think I can identify with where you're coming from. I'm sure there are plenty of schools where students aren't as well-educated about sexual education or lack discipline, but that doesn't mean that there aren't smart teenagers out there who are choosing to have healthy sexual relationships.

I should know, I'm one of them. There are plenty of adults making MUCH worse decisions out there that impact many people other then just themselves. If I make a poor decision now, it only hurts me; adults have a lot more responsibility, and so, much more power.

My parents started talking to me about sex at an early age, and they've always been supportive of me. They were always strict about having boys in my room, certain overnight parties, and the like, but they let me make my own mistakes sometimes. My parents are the kinds of people who accept everyone, all races, religions, orientations, and I think that's what really teaches kids respect.

I also hope you don't think I was suggesting that you ridicule pregnant or STI infected teens; I would never make that kind of implication about someone I've never met! I was only referring to a few isolated incidents at my school, where ignorant people decided to make some unfounded comments.

Once again, just because I became sexually active in high school and went on cam for someone once doesn't mean that I haven't gone about it in the safest way possible.