Weird Feelings Towards Makeup

[athena123]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Briar I have a lot of conflicting emotions about makeup, not that I let that stop me. Lol! Nearing 40 and being into bright colors I am a bit of an anomoly because us "older" ladies are supposed to age gracefully and look natural.

Good for you Briar and Pish posh on aging gracefully and going the neutral/natural route!

I'm 42 YIKES going on 43 next month and while I've been wearing natural, subtle mineral makeup for the past couple of years, I only broke out of my subtle shell a couple months ago and discovered that bold eyeshadows are kind of like hats [I wear hats frequently] It takes a certain HATittude to wear a hat well, and the same attitude can apply to makeup as well.

My obsession for the past few years has been skincare. Now that I finally have a routine down pat, I'm definitely branching out into makeup. Very few of my friends and family understand how excited I get when I open up a package in the mail from one of my favorite skincare companies. Some even suggest I could spend my $$ elsewhere but it's my money to spend so I don't really give those criticisms too much credence. As long as I'm not sacrificing mortage payments, etc. to fund my skincare mania, it's not like I really have any other bad habits - well, other than smoking but let's face it - without at least one bad habit, we'd all be pretty boring!

I have gotten my sister in law and a couple of my nieces interested in mineral makeup. Now they, like myself, will never ever go back to the conventional stuff. Trying to get them on board with regular sunscreen applications now.

 

[lafemmenoir]

CAM:
Your post is what I struggle with daily. My interest began in my *gasp* preteen years. I do have a love hate and sometimes guilt. I will bust me arse to get to the store to make a purchase of something I saw swatched and spent all day at work on the comp looking at youtube, specktra, mua et al. Yes, I could put the money to something else, but what? I don't have an extravagant lifestyle, I've recently moved for a temporary assignment where I have no mates, and can't get in a serious romance. But, I don't do anything with it. I don't wear most of it, I guess I'm supplementing boredom, loneliness or something. I know why my makeup started early, I was bullied and teased alot but my mum loved to do her face so I learned and did her face, then it was a segway to make friends. Fast forward and I cannot pass a store without seeing makeup even in Walmart or a dollar store. I do put money toward savings I graduated university...I guess I'm bored....IDK, but don't feel bad for enjoying life, there is too much in life to bring you down. Watch the news for 24 hours and you'll be glad for makeup *hugs*

 

[j_absinthe]

I feel weird too, but for different reasons, the primary one being Western gender conventions. That and I always feel weird buying myself something that most consider a trifle.

I ease my guilt though by taking it as an investment. I figure that if I'm going to strive to be a makeup artist, then I need to get my hands on products and use them.

 

[SquirrelQueen]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Briar I have a lot of conflicting emotions about makeup, not that I let that stop me. Lol! Nearing 40 and being into bright colors I am a bit of an anomoly because us "older" ladies are supposed to age gracefully and look natural. Well, dammit, I like my eyeshadow to reflect my personality, and that's a bit on the loud side. I also feel a bit vain or conceited because I enjoy the way I look, and enjoy the comments I get from others here on my looks.

Quote:

Originally Posted by athena123 Good for you Briar and Pish posh on aging gracefully and going the neutral/natural route! I'm 42 YIKES going on 43 next month and while I've been wearing natural, subtle mineral makeup for the past couple of years, I only broke out of my subtle shell a couple months ago and discovered that bold eyeshadows are kind of like hats [I wear hats frequently] It takes a certain HATittude to wear a hat well, and the same attitude can apply to makeup as well.

ITA!

I'm also in my forties and get so tired of someone else's rules. I do makeup for me because it gives me a boost and it's a little dollop of creativity in my everyday life. It's a way to feel in touch with my femininity. And yes, it's just plain fun. If you're *ahem* over a certain age but still feel comfortable wearing bold colors and can carry them off, why not?

I had a friend who got very weird on me over makeup. She was a minimalist---she was very conservative, very religious and very frugal---but she liked my makeup. So, when we'd go shopping, we'd check out the displays at Target and the Clinique counter at the local department store. But she'd never buy. She liked lipgloss, so for one Christmas, I got her some Lancome Juicy Tubes in subtle colors I thought she'd like. She never wore them. Another year I got her some palettes from Sephora---can't remember the company but they had pulp novel themes like "Mancatcher". The colors were great and the packaging was a hoot! She got upset with me because she thought the pulp novel theme was "obscene". Unreal.

And of course she'd criticize me for my makeup and clothes. I tend to go for soft, subtle colors---they suit my complexion as well as my personal style. But she'd tell me I was wearing too much eye makeup, especially to church, when I was wearing only mascara and a neutral wash of shadow. (Actually, the culture of that particular church was that once women were married---or hit their thirties---they didn't wear much makeup---if any---and they wore dowdy, shapeless dresses and skirts. I did not fit in there very well.)

I really should have gotten her some NARS Orgasm. She would have DIED!

My ex-husband was a control freak who objected to my wearing makeup. If I was wearing lipgloss, he'd refuse to kiss me because of all the "toxins". He was a jerk. When we got divorced, one of the things I did to reclaim myself was to start wearing makeup again---it was nice to reclaim that part of me that had been put down for so long and to enjoy my femininity again. I got remarried last year and my DH is fine with my makeup. A couple of months ago we were in the Twin Cities and he drove out of his way so that I could to to the MAC store in the uptown area. He also doesn't mind if I want to go to Sephora, the MAC store or any of the counters at the Mall of America. The only problem is that he's color blind so he can't appreciate some of the colors of the makeup I wear. I wish I could freak him out by whipping out some Springbean to put on my lips but he wouldn't know that it was green. Still, he never hesitates to kiss me, no matter what I have on my lips, and he especially likes the vanilla lipglasses and the watermelon tendertones.

When I think about people like my former friend and ex-husband, I want to scream, "IT'S JUST MAKEUP! GET OVER IT!" You know, I think it's far healthier to wear the makeup you enjoy---the way you enjoy wearing it---than it is to get all bent out of shape over what other people are doing.

 

[ginger9]

I also don't have any friends that are into make-up, in fact I would say they are anti-makeup. To be honest, they're in their 30s and really don't look good with no makeup on. I used to feel a bit odd and a tiny bit sad that I don't have any friends to share my interest in makeup. There used to be a time when I wondered if I was shallow or vain for having "way more" makeup than a person could need or use.

Eventually I reached an understanding that it's okay to love makeup because I am more than just my makeup. Just because I like to wear makeup doesn't mean I am shallow compared to my bare faced friends. I am super girly but also insightful and worldly. I'm bothered by many people's perception that one must put aside their appearances to show that they care about current events of the world or somehow it makes them more serious and deep. I think that's stereotyping.

What it comes down to is do what makes you happy. If makeup makes me happy why should I deprive myself of it? It's a very healthy interest actually -completely harmless and safe.

 

[janwa09]

There is definitely guilt involved whenever I buy make-up nowadays. I do become happy at the beginning, but end up feeling so bad--like I've wasted money. I think the main reason is that I already have so much make-up to begin with that to buy more seems totally unecessary and excessive. A part of it also has to do with the fact that I'm the only one who gets to enjoy these things in my household--I don't get to share the loot to anyone so it seems kind of selfish too. My sister, who's into make-up like I am lives in another country! My friends don't have the same enthusiasm with makeup as I do--although there are times when they ask me to put make-up on them whenever they attend special occasions. Also, I keep on buying make-up but don't get to use much of it cos of the informal nature of the place I live in (GC, Australia). I mean we walk in our malls barefoot!

 

[Briar]

Quote:

Originally Posted by athena123 Good for you Briar and Pish posh on aging gracefully and going the neutral/natural route! I'm 42 YIKES going on 43 next month and while I've been wearing natural, subtle mineral makeup for the past couple of years, I only broke out of my subtle shell a couple months ago and discovered that bold eyeshadows are kind of like hats [I wear hats frequently] It takes a certain HATittude to wear a hat well, and the same attitude can apply to makeup as well.

That's it exactly!! I've only recently begun re-capturing my creativity and using makeup as the outlet. I can't work on my art every day, but I can spend a little time combining colors artistically on my face. It does take some attitude and I'm ok with that.

And yes! I love, love, love hats! Though I don't wear them as often as I used to.

Over the past year and a half I've begun dressing more funkily, using bolder color on my hair and face, and even did some new piercings in my ears. I'd disconnected with my body for years after a profound weight gain (thanks meds!). I am finally learning to love my body as it is, lumps and all and creative makup has been a BIG part of that.

 

[AKsnoangel]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ginger9 Eventually I reached an understanding that it's okay to love makeup because I am more than just my makeup. Just because I like to wear makeup doesn't mean I am shallow compared to my bare faced friends. I am super girly but also insightful and worldly. I'm bothered by many people's perception that one must put aside their appearances to show that they care about current events of the world or somehow it makes them more serious and deep. I think that's stereotyping. What it comes down to is do what makes you happy. If makeup makes me happy why should I deprive myself of it? It's a very healthy interest actually -completely harmless and safe.

I couldn't have said it better myself. It's unfortunate that such a stereotype exists toward people who wear makeup. I sometimes worry that it carries consequences for me professionally. I am a teacher and I definitely stick out as the youngest and most trendy among the faculty. I guess I have to let my consistent efforts do the talking rather than my perpetually painted lips.

I can't express how ineffably grateful I am to have found Specktra. I have no sisters and all my friends are makeup minimalists. They're good sports about it but they definitely don't share my passion. Sometimes I worry I push it on them too much and they misread it as me thinking they need makeup. Sad!

 

[BunnyBunnyBunny]

I definitely understand how you feel. People especially don't understand me because I am a guy and I loooove makeup. Lots of people don't understand and think it's weird and such. I'm really lucky to have a mother that loves makeup, and shares the love with me. We really relate when it comes to makeup because we both love it haha. I am also lucky enough to have a job where all my coworkers love makeup and love MAC, since I work at a MAC counter. But I get alot of stares and some customers don't understand, but oh well. Be true to yourself. =)

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BunnyBunnyBunny I definitely understand how you feel. People especially don't understand me because I am a guy and I loooove makeup. Lots of people don't understand and think it's weird and such. I'm really lucky to have a mother that loves makeup, and shares the love with me. We really relate when it comes to makeup because we both love it haha. I am also lucky enough to have a job where all my coworkers love makeup and love MAC, since I work at a MAC counter. But I get alot of stares and some customers don't understand, but oh well. Be true to yourself. =)

Aww I can understand where you're coming from. It must be hard when customers and others aren't understanding and accepting towards you. Personally, i have this weird thing where I love guys to do my hair and makeup. i've had my eye on a MA at MAC since the summertime and he finally did my makeup, and it was the best. I probably won't ever go to another MA except for him.

 

[mariecinder]

I know exactly how you feel. Getting some new and gorgeous color always makes me happy. But lately my make up obsession has become a real issue between me and my boyfriend. He contantly makes me feel bad for buying anything new. Everytime I mention that I'm broke he'll say something like "Well if you hadn't bought that make up..." I usually only buy something once a month. Its getting to be a real problem. I just wish he could understand how happy it makes me and it seems like I have so few things in my life that make me happy.

 

[sitasati]

I totally understand you. I feel the same way sometimes. Recently, I haven't bought any mac makeup ..just some drugstore brands. But yeah ..my mother once got pissed off at me for buying too much makeup and said "you're not even pretty so why are you buying makeup?" Since then I've kinda laid off of buying mac for a while and this website. I have no one else either who shares my addiction.

 

[j_absinthe]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BunnyBunnyBunny I definitely understand how you feel. People especially don't understand me because I am a guy and I loooove makeup. Lots of people don't understand and think it's weird and such. I'm really lucky to have a mother that loves makeup, and shares the love with me. We really relate when it comes to makeup because we both love it haha. I am also lucky enough to have a job where all my coworkers love makeup and love MAC, since I work at a MAC counter. But I get alot of stares and some customers don't understand, but oh well. Be true to yourself. =)

Testify!

Seriously though, I'm fortunate enough to be at a point in my life where I've been able to surround myself with open-minded, accepting friends and family. It's just a shame when people who are supposed to be open-minded aren't.

It's still very odd for me going into a makeup aisle or store because those gender specific barriers are still ingrained in me, no matter how much I try to shake them. I'm always ready to tell a girl at the MAC counter or something that "I'm getting it for my sister"-I've only had to do it once, but I actually was getting some stuff for my sister.

Another thing too is that people have this misconception that I want to be a woman or that I'm feminine and want to be a drag queen or something. It's not that, I'm just...theatrical.

 

[landonsmother]

i go though it all the time. my family/boyfriend doesn't understand my obsession with makeup but i try to explain that loving makeup is like how boys love cars but they still don't get it. errrrrrr. whatever though. i'm not gonna stop buying makeup just coz people don't understand my obsession. it always makes me happy when i buy makeup

 

[landonsmother]

i go though it all the time. my family/boyfriend doesn't understand my obsession with makeup but i try to explain that loving makeup is like how boys love cars but they still don't get it. errrrrrr. whatever though. i'm not gonna stop buying makeup just coz people don't understand my obsession. it always makes me happy when i buy makeup

 

[SparklingWaves]

Oh, yes, I too wish that I had someone in my life to share my joy.

I love to try new looks on too. Just recently, I tried on the white eyeliner on my waterline with dark blue eyeliner around my eyes. I had soft pink on the cheeks and lips. I felt pretty wearing something new.

My family isn't into it all. Hubby just says, "Oh, you got something new." I think that I really want him to say - "Wow, that really looks pretty."

Even though I am older, I don't feel older mentally. When I get a new lipstick, blush, etc., I am still that teen girl experimenting with makeup and I am so happy just to own it.

 

[glamdoll]

I love makeup! A lot. Its just that sometimes I am so conpulsive to shop. ugh. But yeah I love it, my husband is supportive in t he manner that he doesnt say anything like negative to me. but makes me save up for my own.. boo.

 

[alien21xx]

I'm lucky to have a sister and friends who love make-up, but I guess they don't see it the way I do. My sister feels that my obsession is a way for her to mooch make-up off me (I do spoil her a lot by letting her go through my stash and pick out whatever she wants, it's my way of trying to share my interest though inevitably, it really feeds my obsession even more as giving stuff away makes me want to buy more of it to replace what I had parted with.) And my friends, while they love beauty products and make-up, are all very minimalist in their looks. It's hard to share interest in, say, ultramarine colored pigments and eyeshadow.

Also, most of my friends admit they are too cheap to buy MAC. Le sigh...

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mariecinder I know exactly how you feel. Getting some new and gorgeous color always makes me happy. But lately my make up obsession has become a real issue between me and my boyfriend. He contantly makes me feel bad for buying anything new. Everytime I mention that I'm broke he'll say something like "Well if you hadn't bought that make up..." I usually only buy something once a month. Its getting to be a real problem. I just wish he could understand how happy it makes me and it seems like I have so few things in my life that make me happy.

Exactly...

Quote:

Originally Posted by sitasati I totally understand you. I feel the same way sometimes. Recently, I haven't bought any mac makeup ..just some drugstore brands. But yeah ..my mother once got pissed off at me for buying too much makeup and said "you're not even pretty so why are you buying makeup?" Since then I've kinda laid off of buying mac for a while and this website. I have no one else either who shares my addiction.

Wow. I can't believe she said that to you. Thats horrible. Its a shame that we all feel wrong or guilty for loving makeup. We really shouldn't have to deal with that.
Quote:

Originally Posted by alien21xx I'm lucky to have a sister and friends who love make-up, but I guess they don't see it the way I do. My sister feels that my obsession is a way for her to mooch make-up off me (I do spoil her a lot by letting her go through my stash and pick out whatever she wants, it's my way of trying to share my interest though inevitably, it really feeds my obsession even more as giving stuff away makes me want to buy more of it to replace what I had parted with.) And my friends, while they love beauty products and make-up, are all very minimalist in their looks. It's hard to share interest in, say, ultramarine colored pigments and eyeshadow. Also, most of my friends admit they are too cheap to buy MAC. Le sigh...

I just gave a friend some makeup, and I felt good while I was sorting it out. Just because I was going through my makeup and giving some to her lol. (I've always done that with her). Everyone I talk to says how expensive MAC is. And sometimes it can be. But I've learned that I'm spending $10 on an eyeshadow that will last me years and years. Or $25 on a foundation thats going to match my skin perfectly and last me 6 months. They just don't understand.

 

[Krasevayadancer]

I can totally relate. Sometimes i feel like i am the only person in the world who is obsessed with makeup. Then i see some of you ladies posting on here and all is well again :-D

In all seriousness, it helps to have a real life friend who loves makeup as much as you do. Til then, you do always have us