Who argues about candles???

[CantAffordMAC]

So me and my boyfriend will be moving in together in about a month.

I bought some Yankee candles a couple weeks ago (they were having a semi-annual sale) So I got 4 of them for fall and wintertime. I want our house to be cozy and warm and nice-smelling.

So then my boyfriend keeps telling me that he wants potpourri and plug-ins. Umm first off, potpourri barely smells at all. (He wants it for "decoration"). Plug-ins? Thats great and all, but I don't want plug-ins all over the place. Maybe one in the bathroom. Thats it. I LOVE candles....everything about them. Sexy, romantic, smell good. And you can't get any better than Yankee...

So we actually have an argument. Because he says that the Yankee candles look cheap since they are in a glass jar and he doesn't want jars sitting all over the house. And that we can find the same candle by a different company that doesn't come in a glass jar. (he thinks crazy thoughts. he doesn't wear bright boxers because he thinks they look dirty)

ARE YOU SERIOUS? Yankee candles don't look cheap at all. He doesn't even want to give them a shot. I told him, we'll try your idea first and then mine. Nope. Yankee candles look cheap. I told him that they sell plates and lampshades to go with the candles. He said that doesn't make it any better.

I don't know how to compromise with him. I try to be open minded but he isn't. I can't force him to do anything. I know its a silly thing to argue over....but I want my candles! I should be able to have them! They don't look cheap! How can we compromise and come to an agreement? He feels extremely strong about not having the candles, and I feel just as strong about having them.

If things are like this with CANDLES....I can only imagine whats going to happen when something bigger happens.

 

[chocodcocoa]

I was under the impression that glass jars are safer for candles so the wax doesn't drip out or the candle stand doesn't tip over and light everything on fire...? If he thinks glass jars are cheap looking how about drinking glasses?

I can't really help you though =( I'm not into candles... but this should just be a little pet peeve kinda things... like tooth paste with some people.

 

[Janice]

Try a cute decorative tart burner and tarts, Yankee Candle has a huge selection of them and tarts smell just as lovely and strong as the candles. We have tart burners all over our house!

Of course it's a silly thing to argue over, but this is the man you have chosen to build a life and shack up with.

 

[SparklingWaves]

I love Yankee candles. Those aren't cheap in my check book. I don't like potpourri, because it collects dust. As you said, it doesn't give off much of a scent either.

When you live with each other, you do learn more about each other. Even after decades of knowing someone, you will still learn new things about your partner.


It can be that he can have his potpourri in one part of the house and you have your have your candles in another. Or, you can have candles that smell like potpourri.

 

[NubianHoneii]

I sympathise with you. I live with my boyfriend and when you do you tend to fight over little things like that.

If you can get to Pennsylvania (around the crossings outlets) try going to the American Candle factory. Maybe all the diff candles there can sway him the right way.

 

[user79]

This sounds more like a problem of not being able to work out your arguments, and not being able to come to a compromise.

I'm glad my bf pretty much lets me do whatever I want with decorating. He doens't have a clue!

 

[Hilly]

I never buy plug ins. I heard they can cause fires! And my biggest fear in the world are fires.

 

[user79]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hilly I never buy plug ins. I heard they can cause fires! And my biggest fear in the world are fires.

But so can candles? Hehe...

 

[Hilly]

nm lol its a hoax!

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Glade PlugIns Fire Hazard

 

[Melly44]

Aww! i hope it works out for you! im glad my bf is clueless about decorateing too!! lol..

 

[greentwig]

Well expect to get in little stupid argument a LOT since you’re going to move in together. You will learn lot's of things about each other and little things that both of you do will slowly get to on each other’s nerves. You just have to learn to love each other even w/ those things that bug you. Later you'll realize something’s that seemed annoying don’t really matter much.

The thing that's hard at times is to get thru the arguments, and if you both try to communicate and work thru your problem's then you'll be good

. Maybe today he will cool down and you can talk about it again. Usually things cool down a little bit the next day.

Well you'll see what I mean once you move in together. I'm sure you'll be fine, the 1st 6 months I'd say is frustrating. Just dont give up.

Hope that helps

 

[Girl about town]

lol tell him you will have candles if you like, pot pourri looks dirty like contents of an ashtray, and plug ins use electricity! when you live with people you need to accept things they like.

 

[Girl about town]

ps i love yankee candles the baby powder one rocks, my boyf hates my clean linen one but i keep on burning it lol x

 

[Hilly]

In my experience, relationships are all about compromise. Maybe you can have a candle in your area of your home and he can have potporri in his area.

 

[nunu]

I think he is being silly. I am assuming that both of you are going to pay rent so you can do what you like because your paying for your share of the flat.

 

[jdepp_84]

My mom dosent like the jars either so she takes them out of them and then puts them on top of upside down champagne glasses and they look real nice.

 

[Simply Elegant]

This seems more to be getting what you each want instead of what to use to make your apartment smell good.

If you can't compromise on something, then maybe you shouldn't get either one at all. Think about if this is worth the stress of the argument.

 

[MAC_Pixie04]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissChievous But so can candles? Hehe...

Electric fires are far more dangerous!

My mom's a Partylite candle consultant, and I have no choice but to like candles. Lucky for me, my boyfriend loves them so we won't have this issue.

Hope he comes to the light....literally!

 

[prinzessin784]

Seriously, arguing over something like candles is a bad sign. If you're going to live together and can't agree on something as simple and trivial as candles it is not going to make dealing with real problems any better. You should really talk to him and work out a compromise and a way to deal with arguments in the future.

 

[CantAffordMAC]

LoL thanks everyone for all of the help. We haven't discussed it...I'm going to wait until we move in. I'm not going to have all my candles on one stupid little table or something. Thats dumb. I should be allowed a candle for each room. We can fill the house with potpourri--I don't care!

I know they make the tarts and I was thinking that. Thats like...gone in one night though. You know? I'd rather buy the big one that burns for like 90+ hours.


Quote:

Originally Posted by jdepp_84 My mom dosent like the jars either so she takes them out of them and then puts them on top of upside down champagne glasses and they look real nice.

How does she take them out of the jars??????