why does EVERY GUY just want sex?!?!?!?!

[AdlersMommy22]

ive had it.. Im seriously at my breaking point...

brief history

I dated my son's father off and on for 6 years... Since I was 16 (he was 24 at the time) til I got pregnant.. he told me either I get rid of the baby or he'd never talk to me again- i told him to take a hike and that's where I am now.

I also dated another guy durring the time i WASNT dating my son's father and that ended up being just a "well the sex was good" relationship..

Now its like just because I have a baby all men think i'll put out! I havent had sex SINCE I got pregnant and I just-- ugh.. its been like 6 guys in a ROW now..

I met this guy who works for the secret service.. and he was really nice and we were talking for a lil bit and supposed to hang out on tuesday night.. I spent MAD money on MAC for my date.. went out and bought a brand new outfit.. I was SO EXCITED.. first date since I had my son 6 months ago and i was SO pumped

Find out tonight he just wanted sex. He told me that he didnt want to come to my house and pick me up because this was "just sex" to him... that he could come to my town and get a hotel room and we could have sex and then he could go back home (an hour away)

NOT exactly what I was looking for..........

I just feel SO worthless.. I feel like I'll never ever ever meet a guy who wants ME.... not just sex. And this guy is almost 30 years old! And my son's father will be 30 in a few months!! I mean REALLY! WTF?!?!?!?

I just dont know what to do.. and I just feel like-- whats even the point of trying? I dont want to have sex right now unless im in a stable relationship with someone.. I just... ugh. I am so upset about this stupid secret service piece of shit.. and i mean... really!

 

[nikki]

What a jerk!!!!! Don't worry the right guy will come along when you least expect it!

 

[nursee81]

I think to find someone now a days that is really worth it is really hard. IMO. I have been with my husband for almost 10 yrs now and been married 2yr. We have had our ups and down and separated for a few months here and there but always manage to fix things at the end. Every single guys I have met at those times just want sex. I have many friends that are single and have a hard time finding any one decent. Some of my g/f act like guys and just use the guys for sex. Just the same ways they use girls.
I think you should not worry about finding someone you will find someone when you least expect it. I think guys are stupid and don't know what they want.

 

[TISH1124]

Thats Terrible...But aren't you glad you found out his true intentions upfront!! So you can avoid him like the plaque. Just be patient the right man will come along...There are many good men out there looking for a good woman like you. God will send him to when the time is perfect...Not always when we want him..But when it's right.

I always used to say to myself before I married my current husband and I was still dating.. I will only date men that I didn't mind my son growing up to be just like..and in your case you knew on date one he was not a man you would ever want your son to be. LOSER!!!

and P.S. It was clearly not about you...But the simple fact that he was a Jerk and unfortunately you have just met a few jerks.

 

[sneaky9]

Dont worry sweety, men arent worth stressing over.
You are very beautiful and your son is adorable. I would say just enjoy being a mommy for now and wait for the right guy to come along.

 

[AdlersMommy22]

I hope you guys are right- it just makes me feel like im not..........worth it- you know? :-(

 

[AdlersMommy22]

Quote:

Originally Posted by TISH1127 I always used to say to myself before I married my current husband and I was still dating.. I will only date men that I didn't mind my son growing up to be just like..and in your case you knew on date one he was not a man you would ever want your son to be. LOSER!!!

so true!!! I think that way about Adler... I dont want to be around someone who isnt a good role model for him....And i am glad i found out BEFORE I went out with him that all he wanted was sex... blah!

 

[Simply Elegant]

But these guys actually aren't worth you though. Try not to take it too personally because this guy probably would have treated any girl like that. Better to know this now than later on after meeting your son.

 

[coachkitten]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AdlersMommy22 I hope you guys are right- it just makes me feel like im not..........worth it- you know? :-(

YOU ARE WORTH IT! There are A LOT of guys out there that don't want just that from a woman and are looking for loving and healthy relationships. Trust me I have been through my share of jerks like that but someone will come along that will make you think differently. Plus it just gives you more incentive to raise your son to respect women.

 

[PuterChick]

You are young and have lots of time. Take your time and DO NOT settle!

 

[kimmy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by coachkitten Plus it just gives you more incentive to raise your son to respect women.

that's exactly what i was going to say...and look at the bright side, the less time you spend dating jerks like that one, the more time you can spend bonding with your son.

 

[aleksis210]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AdlersMommy22 so true!!! I think that way about Adler... I dont want to be around someone who isnt a good role model for him....And i am glad i found out BEFORE I went out with him that all he wanted was sex... blah!

AW! your such a good mommy! Well you're young and really pretty and unfortunately there aren't too many guys out there that want something other than sex...This is going to sound like tyhe most backward advice, but have you ever considered (or maybe you have!) dating someone either your own age or even a little bit younger? From my OWN experience it seems like older guys are either controlling or are just out to use you...I feel like when a guy is younger he kind of is in 'awe' of you and treats you better...then again it may be just the type of guy I go for,but they are always younger!..and my BF always goes for older guys and they are always DICK-HEADS. lol.

 

[HeavenLeiBlu]

Well, I don't *just* want sex... but I do want it all the time... so I see why guys do. Sorry men are pigs. (((hugs)))

 

[AdlersMommy22]

Thanks for everything girls- I feel so much better after reading al your posts-- you have NO idea.... It makes me feel good to know that Im not the only one out there that's dealt with jerks- I mean I knew before that I wasn't... it just seems to eventually come out in EVERY guy I meet, you know? blah....

I got another text from the secret service agent last night at like 2am that was like "are you SURE you dont want me to come to Peoria and get a hotel?"

I didnt even respond.. just deleated his number- yes, I'm sure- jackass. grrrrrr

 

[couturesista]

^^ Good 4 U^^^ U are so beautiful and such a good mom, like the other posters have said before, u will find the right guy, just be patient and firm on ur decision not to settle. I know now it sounds like blah blah blah , but its so true. Remember, experience is a good teacher, and ur getting the experience to know who to stay away from.

 

[florabundance]

Not every guy wants JUST sex, that guy was just a specific kind of asshole that should be avoided at all costs.
Call it a lesson learned and don't feel bad. Think about the way he approached you and his attitude toward you so next time around, you can spot someone similar more easily

 

[nursee81]

You are young and beautiful enjoy your life and son. The right guy will come along.

 

[MacAddict_Sami]

Worthless you are certainly NOT!!! You seems like an AWESOME mother!!! The right guy will come along... In this situation, I think that it's better you know upfront of his crack-ass intentions... I would have sooooooo drop kicked his ass...

 

[kittykit]

You're certainly not worthless! This type of men don't deserve you. The right guy will come to you one day.

 

[User93]

Damn that guy is an asshole. I just wanna say that I agree with Coachkitten, some nice guy will definitely appear. You're young, and you're such a hot mama

Also I like the fact you have high moral values, you're a very strong girl. Unfortunately, I gotta agree that majority of the men are jerks and meeting the one who is good is not that easy. But I also wanted to say thats its not only for women - I had a talk with a guy, and he said that finding a good girl is a very difficult thing too, that the majority of girls now are shady, unfaithful, and are only looking for money, fun and sex. Don't throw tomatoes at me, but man, thats true too.

Finding a person who you can have a stable relationship is damn tough both ways. I want you to know you are not alone at all! Lots of girls around me are facing the same problem. Good guys are becoming extinct it seems

You are not worthless at all! I respect you for all your values, believes and actions. And teah, that men just dont deserve a hot mama like you at all.