An Asian Girl with unrealistic beauty standards :(

[TISH1124]

Quote:

Originally Posted by iCandy it's normal for all brown girls to try to look white.. We watch white movies We see white girls who look great ( mostly because they're catered to ) We see ads that make white girls look super glamourous/sexy I think white girls are gorgeous, but in a very different way than chinese girls, asian girls and arabian girls and of course us black girls. Why can't we appreciate all shapes and forms of beauty? It's impossible.. only one can be the best and right now that's blonde blue eyed girls like Blake Lively who are pretty plain to most of us. I think they're gorgeous but the most beautiful to me have always been arabian/indian girls for some reason.. and then black girls ( dark skin ) and so on down the line.. that is just me. But in a white world, of course white girls get #1 status.. what do you expect?? And because the rest of the world falls in line behind that.. we are all tryign to get our bodies, face, hair and features to LOOK like white girls. Asian girls cutting their eyelids Black girls doing weaves It's got to stop but it won't until the races blend a bit more and we start having less white people.. this is the only solution.. don't think for a second that while they run sh*t, they won't make the decisions as far as who gets idolized. They run things.. we just get to decide whether or not we buy their bull or not. Younger girls ( pre-teens) are especially gullible and trying so hard to be just like that white cheerleader in their school.. luckily for me I was a little militant and was rocking a fro even in junior high.. but not everyone is strong minded. Some of them never escape this deep-seated self-hate that they are dark skin.. just look at lil kim

I am pretty speechless to be honest with your response...you are certainly entitled to your opinions...But, honestly, are you serious??? Your response sounds so racist and judgemental to say the least and that is simply IMO

 

[Shimmer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by iCandy it's normal for all brown girls to try to look white.. We watch white movies We see white girls who look great ( mostly because they're catered to ) We see ads that make white girls look super glamourous/sexy I think white girls are gorgeous, but in a very different way than chinese girls, asian girls and arabian girls and of course us black girls. Why can't we appreciate all shapes and forms of beauty? It's impossible.. only one can be the best and right now that's blonde blue eyed girls like Blake Lively who are pretty plain to most of us. I think they're gorgeous but the most beautiful to me have always been arabian/indian girls for some reason.. and then black girls ( dark skin ) and so on down the line.. that is just me. But in a white world, of course white girls get #1 status.. what do you expect?? And because the rest of the world falls in line behind that.. we are all tryign to get our bodies, face, hair and features to LOOK like white girls. Asian girls cutting their eyelids Black girls doing weaves It's got to stop but it won't until the races blend a bit more and we start having less white people.. this is the only solution.. don't think for a second that while they run sh*t, they won't make the decisions as far as who gets idolized. They run things.. we just get to decide whether or not we buy their bull or not. Younger girls ( pre-teens) are especially gullible and trying so hard to be just like that white cheerleader in their school.. luckily for me I was a little militant and was rocking a fro even in junior high.. but not everyone is strong minded. Some of them never escape this deep-seated self-hate that they are dark skin.. just look at lil kim

Quite possibly in the top ten most racist posts I've ever seen on this site.

 

[S.S.BlackOrchid]

You're not alone. Impossible to attain beauty standards permeate media so much that you don't have to read fashion magazines or watch tv to feel unsatisfied with how you look.

I have had body image issues, since I was young also. I'm Indian and hated my broad shoulders, a bigger frame (even after losing a LOT of weight, I'm thicker than my family members), thick, coarse, curly hair (of course, the rest of my family has long, silky, wavy hair), dark skin, hairy shapeless eyebrows, etc. And this is coming from a person who does not read fashion magazines and has very little interest in the fashion world. Of course, my father loved to remind me how big and ugly that I was.

What helped me a lot was working out with my male friends and studying the human body. While I still have some insecurities, I have learned to focus on function as opposed to form. I work out to gain endurance, run longer, lift more, etc. It gives me positive reinforcement when I can impress them with my abilities. I have also learned to appreciate the human body for being as complex, and so capable as it is, and it makes me improve my body in a way that it works more efficiently. This has helped motivate me to change my diet and work out.

NO ONE is beautiful to everyone, and this includes the "most beautiful women." People have so many different ideas of what is beautiful.

 

[cutemiauw]

Sometimes I really wonder where society gets all this beauty "standards". I also grow up thinking I could never be pretty because I'm dark skinned. Now I have to laugh when I remember that

Now I think I am pretty

. I mean, I believe that everyone could be beautiful when they believe in themselves, embracing who their beautiful inner selves

.

One of my eye opening moment was when I studied abroad in Germany (I'm Indonesian). I came to find out that some people here actually envied my skin tone

. I finally realized that some people just can't stop thinking that the grass on someone else's lawn is greener. So yeah, now I LOVE being dark skinned

.

BTW, I remember one time I went to a MU counter in Indonesia, the sales girl said to me, "Umm... I'm sorry but, *paused for a moment*, ma'am I'm sorry to say that you are dark skinned..."

 

[chocolategoddes]

Quote:

Originally Posted by iCandy It's got to stop but it won't until the races blend a bit more and we start having less white people.. this is the only solution.. don't think for a second that while they run sh*t, they won't make the decisions as far as who gets idolized. They run things.. we just get to decide whether or not we buy their bull or not.

My face right now:

Um, are you serious? Are you trying to start a revolution or something???

 

[jadey_boo]

.....

 

[2Fruits]

Hey Luvsic!

I empathise with you on many levels! I am white, caucasian and grew up in a very white caucasian environment. I was teased in primary school (but then again... who wasn't?) about being pale but with dark features (hair + eyebrows) and at that time wished to be tanned and blonde. I am still very, very self-concious about a few things today. On the other hand I was often was told by people that they wish they were skinny like me, etc.

Then when I was finishing yr 8, I moved schools to a very multicultural, 70% asian environment where all of a sudden I became acutely aware and envious of many asian features.

I went on exchange for a year to Japan where I found the grass was always greener. In Japan the women especially are very concious of their skin and looking polished and gorgeous. Instead of fitting into the smallest size jeans in Aus, I would be a medium or large in Japan and my perception of how I looked changed entirely. Instead of trying to put on weight like I did in Aus, I tried to maintain my weight in Japan. After being surrounded by girls who had beautiful pale skin, instead of trying to be tan I constantly used sunscreen and whitening lotion!!! In Japan schoolmates often commented on my 'tall nose' (in their opinion beautiful) which I have and am acutely self concious of from a Western ideals perspective.

Now that I am back, I still judge my self from Australian ideals but I came to realise that

-The grass is always greener

-We will judge ourselves the same way as we judge our environment or how we think our environment judges us (the way we think people see us and the way they do see us are entirely different)

-Opinons of beauty are totally subjective and can and will change throughout our lives and throughout history

-Humans by nature are self centered, are concerned more about how they themselves look than how you look

I think the most important thing is to be confident in who you are, inside and out. Everyone has flaws, some more noticable than others and I think plastic surgery (conservative) can improve peoples self esteem BUT there will always be something that we dislike (e.g. I finally get rid of those scars all of a sudden I will notice cellulite which I don't like etc. etc.) and often improving how we look (or more importantly how we percieve we look) starts on the inside first.

xx

 

[User38]

God allmighty! How old is everyone here??

Move on and live your lives!

 

[Almond_Eyed]

I think as people grow up and mature you worry less about your body image. Physically, it just goes downhill after your 20s: wrinkles, age spots, stretch marks from having babies, etc, all you have left is your mind and personality.

As far as Tish's "racist" post... I don't think it's necessarily racist because honestly, after you step outside of North America... racism is a billion times worse. I watched a documentary where girls in Japan explicitly say "I want to look like a white girl." How much more blunt can you get?

If you look at the history of colonization, the whites considered themselves "superior" and "civilized." A friend told me that he travelled to the Dominican Republic, being white meant you got better service because caucasians were associated with having money. In the entire history of human "civilization," one race always considers themselves superior to others: Egyptians enslaving Hebrews, Europeans stealing land from the First Nations, white colonies enslaving Africans, Hitler slaughtering Jews, U.S. Government vs. Middle East... I could go on...

There are deeply historical and political reasons why things are the way they are. I live in a very multi-cultural city where racist attitudes are frowned upon, but if you look closer and you'll see that racism is everywhere.

 

[angelbug]

To respond to the original poster: I definitely understand how you're feeling. I think in this society we all compare ourselves to others, and beauty / physical attractiveness plays a huge role.

I'm no doctor, but you might be suffering from body dysmorphic disorder? I don't know too much about it, but I remember an episode on Oprah where there were several people who were obsessed with the way they looked.

I think as members of a mac community, we're all interested in beauty/makeup, but we just have to remember there are more important things in life

 

[luvsic]

.

 

[Nox]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Almond_Eyed If you look at the history of colonization, the whites considered themselves "superior" and "civilized." A friend told me that he travelled to the Dominican Republic, being white meant you got better service because caucasians were associated with having money. In the entire history of human "civilization," one race always considers themselves superior to others: Egyptians enslaving Hebrews, Europeans stealing land from the First Nations, white colonies enslaving Africans, Hitler slaughtering Jews, U.S. Government vs. Middle East... I could go on...

*sigh*

You do realize that Egypt is in Northeast Africa, right?

Don't be fooled by Elizabeth Taylor's rendition of "Cleopatra"...

 

[LILYisatig3r]

God I'm sorry for bumping this thread, but I came across it when I searched "False lashes for Asian eyes" in the Specktra search and I can't help but post.

I used to be in the exact same boat as you. I almost think I really still am. Growing up, almost all of my friends crack Asian jokes or say "You're like this because you're Asian", "Why don't you like that, you're Asian?" and things like that. Perfect example would be, "Wait, you're bad at math? But you're Asian! You're supposed to be good!" .. yeah. And you're white, are you trying to say you're supposed to be stupid? It just really hurts sometimes when I want to find people that accept me for me without having to say it's because I'm Asian or this or that.

I'm always surrounded by gorgeous people of all colors and races, but I never feel as beautiful. My eyes aren't as small as other Asian girls, but I have a horrifically large nose - at least that's how I see it. My boyfriend, my family, and all my close friends (who incidentally are the only ones that never said Asian comments) constantly try to tell me that I'm beautiful the way I am. I've come to terms with a lot of the facial features that are common in being Asian. Smaller eyes, flatter face shapes, no prominent crease... but it's still frustrating when I look in the mirror in the mornings and hate what I see in the mirror. I think a lot of that insecurity stems from so many of the times I've been hurt in relationships. Any time someone I was dating left me for someone else or commented that some other girl was cute, I'd be thinking to myself, oh is that because I'm not like them that I'm not equally as beautiful?

It took me a long, long, LONG, time to realize that it's because I felt that way that they did. No man wants to be with a woman who thinks she's nasty looking. Confidence attracts people and when you love yourself, others will love you too. How are you coming along in your search for self-perfection? I've learned it really does start on the inside. For the longest time, I researched rhinoplasty too so I could finally fix that god-awful nose I thought I had.But I've finally reached that point where I realize, if all my close friends and family think I'm beautiful, then maybe it's time I do too.

It's a tough journey. I won't lie. Especially being surrounded by beauty concepts that are geared towards the Caucasian majority. There will be times where you'll fall back on your old doubts, fears, and self-disgust. But it's the part where you lift yourself out of that rut of self-loathing that makes you stronger and more beautiful because of it; when you finally learn to love yourself.


Quote: God allmighty! How old is everyone here??

Move on and live your lives!


By the way, you're not being very helpful... how is that constructive to someone who is asking advice? It's almost rude.

 

[Serenebassdrop]

if you really won't get surgery, i guess all you can do to "emphasize yourself" is deal with makeup. if you really want the "western look" why not try fake tanning or eyelid glue or tape to make your eyes appear bigger? and contouring for your nose.

I am so so so upset that someone would even suggest eyelid glue, fake tanning and tape that is the epitome of fakeness and insecurity .
tsk tsk.



anyways, sadly your perception of beauty has been distorted.. By the media, because even though you don't compare your self with airbrush models. YOU DO.
Why? because the girls you know and the girls on facebook look more like airbrushed models than you think you do right?
therefore you are still comparing yourself.
You need to stop, I wan't to tell you something?
you are infinitely beautiful every single one of you is extremely gorgeous, and your so called imperfections are unique and what make you! you!
do people really strive to look unrealistic people? Do you all really want to look like each other?
Do you wan't to know why these girls in the magazines and television and internet look the way they do?
Simple its called profit.
How is this profitable you ask?
Well, they place the image of an unrealistic Impossible unless genetic beauty and bombard humanity with this image, they become programmed that in order to be happy, sexually satisfied, loved, wanted, saught after.. etc etc etc.. You have to look like these women in the media.
But a normal beautiful unique girl does not look like that, therefore there is a "solution" creams, lotions, surgeries, software, contacts, fucking eyelid glue you name it they got it.
These companies make extreme profit out of your misery that they have caused.
The produce a problem that does not exist and they also provide the answer its that easy!
Why do you think they pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for an ad thats only 30 seconds? Simple.

You are so beautiful and you do no need to compare yourself, I had the same problems being a latina.
I felt terrible horrendous because I was not a c-cup, fair haired light skin gal.
I basked in the never ending hell of insecurity, It wasn't until a series of events that I opened my eyes, to the lies and saw how beautiful me and every living being is.
You are beautiful, Health and happiness are what make you shine and confidence is beautiful.
I happen to think asian woman are beautiful infact, I used to always envy asian women and wished I was born in asia.