I'm so sorry for your loss.
I know that it may seem like the pain and heartache will never stop and that some days will be harder than others -- and you may not even want to get out of bed in the mornings - but know that many people, strangers and friends on Specktra included - love and care for you no matter what and are thinking of you constantly.
I feel your pain - I lost my mother when I was 11 and my daughter when I was 20. No one knows the pain of loss until you've felt it yourself. I can only imagine how empty you feel losing the person you married and loved.
We're thinking of you and praying. Many people here are willing to lend an ear for support, so never be afraid to ask someone to listen.
I hope that peace will find you and comfort you during these sad and hard times.