I'm struggling..

[user79]

Your situation def sounds exactly what I was going through in my last year or so of university. It's depression, and it is very common among students. All the symptoms you describe seem to point in the direction of depression. I know exactly what it feels like, to think no one understands, and in a way they don't.

You should def see a therapist, I never did because I felt so ashamed, but I regret it because my grades ended up suffering big time (I always got really good grades before). It's a very normal thing to happen, in western societies a very large percentage of people (especially women) go through depression at least once in their lives.

I hope you can seek out the help you need, def go to a doctor, they will know how to help you, with medicines and with therapy.

I hope you get onto the road to recovery soon. It is not a trivial thing at all.

 

[girlstar]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nunu I'm kind of embarrased to see the counseller but i know that talking about my problems helps me cope with them.

I remember being embarrassed to go see a counselor once for my anxiety issues. Once I went and spoke to her, I found out that she had seen SO MANY PEOPLE with the same issues as me. That made me feel better because I wasn't embarrassed of myself anymore, and I realised that there are other people dealing with anxiety on a day to day basis as well.. it made me feel a lot better.

I know what you mean about feeling low and depressed and unmotivated.. I moved over here in August and everything was fine until I went back to Canada for Christmas. Ever since I've been back in the UK, I've felt so depressed.. which isn't good because depression makes my anxiety worse. I'm not motivated to do anything, and keep comfort eating. I've gained 20 pounds since August, and I'm not motivated to shed it, at all

 

[Shimmer]

 

[AppleDiva]

Everyone has given you great advice. I just want to give you a super big

You are loved and appreciated.

I know you will get through this time with kind words from loved ones and help from a therapist.

 

[nunu]

thank you everyone for your great love and support.

 

[purrtykitty]

I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. I definitely agree that you should see a therapist, but you should also see a medical doctor to make sure there's nothing else wrong. If anything, maybe he/she can give you something to help you sleep. Sleep deprivation may very well be driving all these other feelings, so if you can get some sleep, it might go a long way in helping you.

I hope you get to feeling better. You know we're always here to listen.

 

[Amymo]

Hi sweety, this is exactly how I felt in my final year at uni. Ask for and take all the help you can get, your lecturers are there to help, as well as the councellor so let them know what is going on. Its a great thing to have hindsight, two years post-uni I love how the stresses of work are nothing like uni, you don't have the same responsability as you feel for your own education, if I could go back and do it differently I'd have taken and allowed myself more time off, not just a couple of hours, take a day or two and do fun things, you will go back to your work better focussed. Treat yourself well and don't be too hard on yourself, a few days off wont cost you your degree, you owe it to yourself to let your body and brain refresh. When you go back to it make sure you take babysteps, promise yourself an aftenoon off for 500 words, it may help you to get into it that way. Please keep in touch, PM me if you like.

 

[Hilly]

Hey girl! I'm so sorry you're feeling down in the dumps. I encourage you to go to a counselor. I just started to and I love it. It's nice to have an hour focused on just YOU and how to help. I wouldn't suggest group therapy at your school. I tried that, and boy it was a bad experience. I personally like the one on one kind.

You're such a beautiful girl with lots of talent, creativity, and kindness.

If you need anything, message me here or on facebook. I'm here for you buddy.

 

[Krasevayadancer]

Oh no sweetie! I am so sorry to hear that you have been having such a rough time.

What people fail to realize sometimes is just how much stress other individuals are under. At times you look for someone to talk to and they dismiss your problems like they are nothing- that is the worst! Have you tried to reach out to one of your local friends? Sometimes having someone there who is nearby can do wonders?

Sounds like your symptoms (insomnia, lack of motivation, energy) are the result of depression. My recommendation is to seek counseling because these things do not get better on their own sadly.

It hurts me to know that you are so upset because you are a beautiful girl both inside and out.

Please do im or message me, I would love to chat with you. (Pinkdance1 on aim and [email protected] on msn)

 

[V15U4L_3RR0R]

Hiya lovely. Don't give up! wE're all behind you here and we all love and support you.

I remember the first time I went to a counseller when I had depression and I wa a little embarrassed too. I'm one of these people that doesn't like to burden others with my problems lol but in the end it was the best thing i ever did and now I'm recovering from my depression after suffering with it for almost 3 years. I can totally empathise about the sleep thing. I'm still very bad at sleeping sometimes.Have you tried taking a relaxing bath before bed? I've also found that if I can't get to sleep after half an hour of lying in bed, I'll get up and do something mindless or repetitive like ironing or clean the dishes or back comb hair for dreads. Then as soon as I feel sleepy, i'll go and lie down in bed a again. At first I was getting up two or three times but it does get better after a week or two. I find that it's helped to train my body that bed is for sleep and not for lying awake.

If you want to talk on here or heck even give me a call, you're more than welcome too anytime, even if it's the small hours of the morning. *hugs*

 

[glam8babe]

awwww hunny! i think we all go through something like this at some point in our lives.. ive been exactly the same: lack of concentration, not going to sleep till early hours of the morning [even after 5AM!], feeling stressed out and all that. Since about October till now ive been stressed from family issues n stuff and also my boyfriend who i almost broke up with and i was so upset for ages my hair kept coming out in clumps from the stress, and my hair is now all thin and lank when it used to be soo volumized and full of life and it just feels like my whole body is changing, ive put weight on [probably from all the christmas food n drink] and i feel like im back where i started coz i lost like 3 stone a few year ago and it feels like im going back slowly but im on a strict healthy eating plan right now so i hope it works!
I also have money issues.. i had a job at xmas working at NEXT and i hated it, there were people who were so bitchy and evil and it stressed me out even having to work til 9pm then getting up again at 7am the next day to work for another 8 hours standing on my feet sorting out peoples parcels and dealing with horrible customers that complain if theres a peice of paper on the floor! so i quit after a few weeks but now i realise i should have kept it coz i really NEED the money and i feel stupid for doin it all the time..

anyway i hope you get better soon lovely!

 

[nunu]

thank you everyone for being so supportive. I feel happy that there are people here who understand me.

thank you ever so much.

 

[athena123]

Ah nunu, big HUGE hugs

from the other side of the pond....

I think we've all been there in one form or another, but your case sounds extreme. Definitely keep on talking to your counseler and it wouldn't hurt to see a doctor as well. I hate to sound like a broken record but your symptoms do indeed point to depression. There's a lot of people who identify with these feelings today; I don't know if it's because there's less stigma attached to it and we feel more free to talk about it, or if it's because we really do suffer more stress in this age.

Don't neglect the link between mind body and spirit either. As crazy as your schedule sounds right now, you may not have time to take in all the nutrients you need, sweetie. Beef up on your water intake, drink plenty of tea, take vitamins and minerals. Herbal supplements like valerian and feverfew can help you turn off the mind so you can get some rest.

If you lay awake thinking of all the things you need to do tomorrow, get a calendar and start writing those things down as soon as you think about it so you can forget about it in peace! I got a Franklin Covey organizer and started doing this about 7 years ago. It really helps because I was one of those people who would snap out of a restful doze into full consciousness with one of those "I have to be sure and call so and so..." moments. Not any more!

Feed your spirit in whatever way suits you best; via prayer, meditation, writing, painting, reading, whatever rocks your boat.

 

[nunu]

thanks for the tips, i'll keep them in mind. I am however feeling better about things today, which is what depression is. You have your high and low days. The university's counselling services therapy sessions take 5 working days to activate so im guessing that i will have to see them sometime next week. I hope it all goes well and i am thinking of defferring a few of my deadlines till the summer.

thank you for your concern
hugs to all of you

 

[nikki]

Hope you feel better soon!!

 

[*KT*]

Sounds like you're having a horribly stressful time followed by all these impending deadlines and thoughts of what you're going to do after you've graduated. I wouldn't be able to sleep either!

I'm glad to hear you're going to get some counseling. Like the other girls said, you've gotta do whatever is going to make you healthy and happy. Consider taking an hour a day to do something relaxing and enjoyable to you. Whether it's playing with makeup and listening to your fav music, meditating, exercising... anything that helps you feel more centered and lets you vent out some of that stress. My routine is to spend 30 minutes on an elliptical while watching an episode of Sex & the City, lol. Running and watching a show is time for me where I don't think about any of my responsibilities.

Hang in there girl and take care of yourself. You can't always control your life, you can only control how you react to it. You're a strong, beautiful woman and you've got all of us here cheering you on!

 

[Girl about town]

Hi nunu im so sorry you feel this way just now, i experienced similar feelings during my final year at university and also just after my son was born. I used to lie in bed staring at the celiling and just felt so empty for no reason at all.

All i can say is be selfish surround yourself with people you love and are good to you!! do things you like , get some exercise and fresh air ( The long cold dark british weather is so depressing) and see your doctor.

You seem like a Gorgeous person , you also seem so intelligent and talented and have a lot going for you , hope you feel better soon xxxxx

 

[darkishstar]

You are a LOVELY person. Even if you don't feel so, please take comfort knowing that other people think you are wonderful! I know it doesn't really help (I've been through it as well) when people tell you something you yourself don't feel, but hang it there! I know you are a strong person. =)

 

[nunu]

thank you girls, i really appreciate your replies. So i plucked up the courage to go to the University's counselling service center and i told the receptionist that i want to see a counseller and she took my details and she will contact me this week for a session with the counseller.

 

[CuttiBeBe]

Hi NuNu, I'm a new member on Specktra and am so thrilled to see the support on this forum! I want to give my 2 cents on depression, since I've gone through it in 2007 as well. It started with panic disorder and anxiety attacks. I thought I could control it, but was unable to function at work. I, too, was not sleeping for days. When you are lack of sleep, your mind is just not acting right. I ended up in the emergency room twice, at 4am in the morning, because I couldn't sleep and I had to get up at 7am, then I paniced in the dark. The doctor's gave me xanax to calm down, and I shut eyes for 2 hours on the hospital bed, it was the best sleep I've ever had. Since then, I've tried to control my depression, stop crying at every little thing, stop getting distracted and start focusing!

The truth is, you cant do it alone. Go see the conselor and find a way. Don't be ashamed. No one's hurting and suffering except for you, so why would you wait? Everyone told me it was just a phase, I will get over it. I'm not sure if I'm over it now, but I am better.

I hope you feel better soon. No one deserves to be depressed. A day passes by with you smiling or frowning, so flash those beautiful smiles! We are all here for you!