Is it really necessary to drink on your 21st birthday?
- Thread starter BloodMittens
- Start date
M.A.C. head.
Well-known member
People said the same thing to me, even more so because my baby was due at the beginning of the year and they thought it be a good post-pregnancy/birthday thing.
My daughter was born exactly a month before my 21st bday. I could have gotten drunk, but I didn't drink at all, because I was breastfeeding. It didn't bother me any. I had a nice little celebration with my parents, siblings, husband, and my new baby girl. BEST. BIRTHDAY. EVER!
My daughter was born exactly a month before my 21st bday. I could have gotten drunk, but I didn't drink at all, because I was breastfeeding. It didn't bother me any. I had a nice little celebration with my parents, siblings, husband, and my new baby girl. BEST. BIRTHDAY. EVER!
sharkbytes
Well-known member
My personal opinion (and I realize it probably isn't a popular one) is that if a person doesn't have a desire to drink when they're by themselves (meaning: they like alcohol, the taste, etc.) then why would they feel the need to drink just because they're in a social situation where others will be drinking? I think a lot of drinking is the result of pressure to fit in, when other people who ARE drinking see someone who isn't, they often feel uncomfortable and try to encourage it.
I'm not generalizing by the way, there's plenty of folks who like a cocktail now and then and couldn't care less about what other people are doing. If that's the case, then sure, have a drink or two and toast your special day. But if you only want to drink because it's expected, I'd recommend thinking about why other people are having such an influence.
I'm not generalizing by the way, there's plenty of folks who like a cocktail now and then and couldn't care less about what other people are doing. If that's the case, then sure, have a drink or two and toast your special day. But if you only want to drink because it's expected, I'd recommend thinking about why other people are having such an influence.
baybooty
Member
yay i'm so glad i'm not the only one.
i turned 21 last month and didn't drink at all. not the night before, the night of, or the day after. my boyfriend & i actually went to sunsplash & spent the entire day together
alcohol is okay to me but i don't enjoy it all that much? on occassion i will have half of my bf's beer but that's rare too. on the other hand he's 5 years older than me and his buddies are always at my house drinking and he does too but he's tolerable and such but yeaah i don't need alcohol to have fun. i have a natural high on life
duckduck
Well-known member
Quote:
So first and foremost, you are a complete sweetheart to keep an eye on a bunch of drunkards without judging them or anything - they are lucky to have such a good friend!
Quote:
Aww, how sweet. In his tiny caveman brain, he is attempting to extend the gift of "fun" to you. Or at least what he considers fun.
Quote:
See, I don't like fish. Sometimes people offer me fish, and I turn them down. Some people persist "but this is really good fish!" "you'll like it if you try it". Once again, I refuse, saying that I am not interested in eating fish. At this point, if they drop the subject, there is no reason for me to be annoyed or offended. Interestingly, some people are STILL insistent on the fish even after this. I have spent entire meals arguing with people over the fact that I do not want any freaking fish. Not only is it completely miserable to sit around having to justifying myself, but it's a waste of time, because nothing they say is going to make me change my mind.
Now I know you don't have the advantage of saying "I've tried being drunk and didn't like it" like I do with fish, but all the same people need to respect that boundary. I personally quite like to drink, but I know it's not for everyone. While I might offer you a drink due to forgetfulness, I would never pressure you to take it after you said no.
Quote:
Yeah, they probably don't mean to be annoying - from their point of view, more fun is had when drinking is involved, and they want you to be having fun. Some people just don't get that drinking and getting drunk is not for everyone, every second of every day. I would definitely thank them for wanting so much to include you in the drinking, and let them know that if you ever decide to start drinking, they will be the first to know.
Oh, and on the subject of getting drunk on the 21st birthday - do you also have to smoke a whole pack of cigarettes on your 18th? Just because you can do something doesn't necessarily make it a good idea.
Originally Posted by BloodMittens
Everyone in my friend group says that they respect me because I don't get drunk, and I watch after them and such. I always make sure they don't do anything harmful to themselves or others when they are intoxicated, not my responsibility but I would rather take it than see them get hurt in some way. |
So first and foremost, you are a complete sweetheart to keep an eye on a bunch of drunkards without judging them or anything - they are lucky to have such a good friend!
Quote:
| Originally Posted by BloodMittens
But lately, my boyfriend's best friend is, no offense, an asshole. He keeps saying he is going to "Get You Smashed!!" and saying that the only way for me to enjoy my 21st birthday is to get drunk. |
Aww, how sweet. In his tiny caveman brain, he is attempting to extend the gift of "fun" to you. Or at least what he considers fun.
Quote:
| Originally Posted by BloodMittens
I have no desire to get drunk, and this is something my friend's have always seemed to be confused about. They don't seem to understand that I can have a good time anytime, not just my birthday, without getting myself piss drunk and making a complete ass of myself. I have told them time and time again that I don't want to get drunk on my birthday, I might drink after that, but when I am READY to start drinking. Not now. |
See, I don't like fish. Sometimes people offer me fish, and I turn them down. Some people persist "but this is really good fish!" "you'll like it if you try it". Once again, I refuse, saying that I am not interested in eating fish. At this point, if they drop the subject, there is no reason for me to be annoyed or offended. Interestingly, some people are STILL insistent on the fish even after this. I have spent entire meals arguing with people over the fact that I do not want any freaking fish. Not only is it completely miserable to sit around having to justifying myself, but it's a waste of time, because nothing they say is going to make me change my mind.
Now I know you don't have the advantage of saying "I've tried being drunk and didn't like it" like I do with fish, but all the same people need to respect that boundary. I personally quite like to drink, but I know it's not for everyone. While I might offer you a drink due to forgetfulness, I would never pressure you to take it after you said no.
Quote:
| Originally Posted by BloodMittens
And now they are starting to "plan" to get me drunk. My boyfriend's best friend told me to "watch" everything I am drinking because he is going to spike everything to get me drunk. I'm just getting SO annoyed with it, I know he's serious too, he would try THAT hard to get to see me drunk. I don't know what else to do, my boyfriend already told him to stop but he just continues to do that crap. I don't know WHY he wants to see me get drunk so badly, I have no desire for it. I have told him already, if I wanted to get drunk I would have years ago with them when they were drinking when they were 17. But no, I always stayed sober and I plan on keeping it that way. I just don't know what else to do... it's very irritating. |
Yeah, they probably don't mean to be annoying - from their point of view, more fun is had when drinking is involved, and they want you to be having fun. Some people just don't get that drinking and getting drunk is not for everyone, every second of every day. I would definitely thank them for wanting so much to include you in the drinking, and let them know that if you ever decide to start drinking, they will be the first to know.
Oh, and on the subject of getting drunk on the 21st birthday - do you also have to smoke a whole pack of cigarettes on your 18th? Just because you can do something doesn't necessarily make it a good idea.
ashleydenise
Well-known member
It's sooo not necessary.. If you can have fun w/o it, then don't bother!! lol I didn't have a single sip on my 21st!
BarrelOfDonkeys
Well-known member
I didn't drink on my 21st birthday, 'course I'm from Canada though so the big "gotta get drunk" birthday around here is the 19th but I didn't drink then either. It annoys me when people think I have to be drunk in order to have fun, cause then I end up getting left out of bar hopping plans just cause I'm not a big drinker. It's been over four years since I turned 19 and in total I've only had I think 14 (might've been 15) drinks since then, never more than two in one night. I don't like alcohol so I'd much rather buy a bottle of pop or something for like half the price.
sonnebutti
Well-known member
hmmm.. in america you can get a tattoo and go to stripclubs at 18 but you cant drink until you turn 21? and you can drive when you re 16.. here you can do EVERYTHING when you turn 18, but I actually think that it's more "safe" to forbid drinking until you re 21.. there are so many car accidents with young people who drink and drive here in portugal, it's sad
NicksWifey
Well-known member
I had a jagerbomb on my 21st and that was it. I was at home having cake and ice cream with my family. I didn't get sloshed or anything. To be honest, I drank waaaay more underaged than I do now legally.
I think what made me happiest about being 21 was being around the people that I love the most and us all having a good time and eating out. I didn't even drink when we went out to eat. To me, it wasn't all about the booze.
I think what made me happiest about being 21 was being around the people that I love the most and us all having a good time and eating out. I didn't even drink when we went out to eat. To me, it wasn't all about the booze.
seonmi
Well-known member
I'm turning 21 in December and my friends were talking about buying me drinks on that day. I was like humm, ok. Honestly, I hate my birthday. It's always in the final week of the semester when my friends and I kill ourselves studying for finals. And then everyone leaves for Christmas break. So I highly doubt we will have time to go to the bar and drink.
I don't think it is necessary to drink on the 21st birthday. It's all up to you. I personally want to go to a club or bar having a drink or two for my birthday because I've been to one lol. I'm not a big drinker anyway. I rarely drink and if I do, I stop when I get tipsy. I do enjoy getting a bit tipsy because it helps me loosen up but getting drunk, doing stupid stuff, and getting sick is no fun. Some people that I know at school, they drink every freaking night and I wonder why they can't put their time in better use once in a while.
I don't think it is necessary to drink on the 21st birthday. It's all up to you. I personally want to go to a club or bar having a drink or two for my birthday because I've been to one lol. I'm not a big drinker anyway. I rarely drink and if I do, I stop when I get tipsy. I do enjoy getting a bit tipsy because it helps me loosen up but getting drunk, doing stupid stuff, and getting sick is no fun. Some people that I know at school, they drink every freaking night and I wonder why they can't put their time in better use once in a while.
BloodMittens
Well-known member
XD
I actually had my first drink (besides New Year's and crap) during my friend's birthday party. It was a Mike's Hard Lime, and the only reason I actually took it is because I LOVED how it tasted, she got me to try it and I loved it.
Of course I was extremely responsible about it, I sipped on the same drink ALL night (about 6 hours) and put it down if I felt a bit dizzy. All I know is I definitely relaxed a bit but I wasn't drunk.
(Also, I didn't know I was preggo at the time, so don't kill me D
Still, never gonna get drunk! :O Gonna be responsible always... and I still think vodka is icky and I don't NEED alcohol to have a good time!
I actually had my first drink (besides New Year's and crap) during my friend's birthday party. It was a Mike's Hard Lime, and the only reason I actually took it is because I LOVED how it tasted, she got me to try it and I loved it.
Of course I was extremely responsible about it, I sipped on the same drink ALL night (about 6 hours) and put it down if I felt a bit dizzy. All I know is I definitely relaxed a bit but I wasn't drunk.
(Also, I didn't know I was preggo at the time, so don't kill me D
Still, never gonna get drunk! :O Gonna be responsible always... and I still think vodka is icky and I don't NEED alcohol to have a good time!
nibjet
Well-known member
I'm 26 and still haven't tasted any alcohol. On my 21st birthday or otherwise! Not because of religious reasons or anything like that, I just have no interest. Plus I'm way clumsy, and think a TON of snarky things that definitely don't need to be said out loud. Alcohol can enhance both of those things, lol
Tinkee-Belle
Well-known member
haha I think not drinking is a good idea... on my 21st I got wasted and was kicked outta the bar at.... 9:30!!!!!! For trying to fight the coat check girl. Classy, classy! Right before that I spent $100 buying a round of shots for complete strangers. Not my finest moment
pumpkincat210
Well-known member
Of course not! I was pregnant when i turned 21 and didn't drink. Sadly i'd had drinks wayyy before then so by the time I was legally old enough to drink i wasn't interested in it anymore. Of course it's everyone's own personal decision, but I think everyone should at least try alcohol once in their lives even if they don't get drunk. My in laws have never touched alcohol and they are quite a strange bunch. but to each their own.
BloodMittens
Well-known member
Like I added before. I only had one drink about two weeks ago, and in moderation is good enough for me. I don't need to drink to have fun, but if I feel like having something or trying something I might. But again, in moderation, no reason to be smashed and making a fool of myself on my 21st XD
xxsgtigressxx
Well-known member
I dont think your friends are trying to be jerks, im sure its that thats how they enjoyed their 21st birthdays so they want you to enjoy it as much. But there really is only one answer here, if you dont feel comfortable, just dont. Just say no, and thats it. Dont let there be conversation about it just say I appreciate the fact that you want me to have a good time, and I will have a good time, without drinking. Thats it, end of discussion. No one can make you do anything, so just stay strong and do what you feel is right for you.
ooshkey
Active member
I believe the choice is really yours. There's really no need to drink on your 21st birthday if you don't want to. Personally, I did drink on mine and I paid for it the next day. Again, it was a choice that I made.
Don't let anyone tell you that you have to drink just because you can. You do what you feel is right for you.
Don't let anyone tell you that you have to drink just because you can. You do what you feel is right for you.
