Lets talk skin tone.

[spectrolite]

Quote:

Originally Posted by joygasm Haha. My bestfriend is australian and she says she wishes she was as tan as me. And my boyfriend is also australian and says he loves it. I don't know, I just wish I was comfortable with the skin I was in.

I hope that you will be one day! I don't think that anything that any of us have to say is going to suddenly change your mind but hopefully you can see that there are beautiful people of all skin tones all around you and although you might not be happy with your own skin it does not stop those who care about you from thinking you are beautiful. It's all in your head.

 

[Morena.Doll]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real People need to develop a tough skin. I'm tired of hearing about "society" puncturing one's self esteem and image. Sure, that's true but you can't go through life blaming all your issues and insecurities on everyone but yourself. Accept how God made you, love you and be satisfied. It's just skin people, it's just skin!

I agree with the "society" part.
It's not just "society's fault" if you're over there thinking it too. IT'S YOU!

 

[Babylard]

Hi joy, i see your avatar and i think you are a beautiful girl, if its worth anything.

i can totally understand the skintone issue. sometimes, i wish i had fairer skin but thats because i want to go blonde lol and im only a nc20-25 which is in the middle, so its not as extreme as you, but we have to embrace what we have and learn to love it, or we will never be happy. my mom uses whitening creams and my sister is heading into that direction as well. i also see on tv how a lot of darker skinned woman suddenly become lighter which i find a little sad in this world.

 

[malaviKat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by joygasm I try to stay out of the sun as much as possible...

I don't go out and bake on the beach, but I don't avoid the sun either. I wear sunscreen and enjoy my colour year round.

 

[malaviKat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by joygasm I've never met a guy that likes darker skin tones. That's just me though...

Really? I can introduce you to entire Facebook groups.

For what it's worth, based on your avatar I would not have assumed you were NC42.

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real Anyway, to answer this; I love my skin, love being a Black woman, love everything about myself. I think people should stop this woe is me, wah-wah crap and start loving themselves too. I don't know, I guess I'm just tired of all this moaning and whining. I'm tired of people, period lol. It's funny though, some people are just never happy no matter what. I'm sure if you were a lighter complexion you would then be complaining about wanting to be darker, tis is life. Some people tend to want what they can't have...opposites attract. There would not be so many tanning salons if that were not the case. Anyhow, good luck sulking in misery. A good therapist may be able to help you; book an appointment. I wish you the best, I sincerely do!

I get that you're trying to make a point, but you really don't have to be so harsh. I'm glad that you love the skin you're in. I just wanted to know if anyone else felt the same way I do. And I want to be able to accept that. I am young though. I'm pretty sure I have a lot of growing up to do before I patch up every insecurity I have. So thanks but no thanks...

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by spectrolite I hope that you will be one day! I don't think that anything that any of us have to say is going to suddenly change your mind but hopefully you can see that there are beautiful people of all skin tones all around you and although you might not be happy with your own skin it does not stop those who care about you from thinking you are beautiful. It's all in your head.

Haha I know. I don't care about other peoples skin tone, it's only me. It's weird because I look at the number rather than the actual shade.

 

[obscuria]

My family always made remarks about me being too pale, back when I used to never go out in the sun and still made remarks about me being too dark when I would come back from vacation or the beaches. I think they just make these remarks just to criticize for lack of anything else to say.

It's a big thing with the Asian culture at least to be as fair as possible and I know a lot of girls that fall for this fair=beautiful stuff and I can see why they might think that but I don't think it is healthy. I was lucky enough not to fall for that because you are born with the skin tone you are born with, so you might as well embrace it.

My family no longer criticizes me about my skintone, probably because I've covered up most of my limbs with tattoos that now they are more preoccupied with criticizing that

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by malaviKat Really? I can introduce you to entire Facebook groups. For what it's worth, based on your avatar I would not have assumed you were NC42.

You should

and haha yeah lighting I guess. I don't look that dark but I'm a bit tanner in person

 

[LoveMakeup4Real]

Quote:

Originally Posted by joygasm I get that you're trying to make a point, but you really don't have to be so harsh. I'm glad that you love the skin you're in. I just wanted to know if anyone else felt the same way I do. And I want to be able to accept that. I am young though. I'm pretty sure I have a lot of growing up to do before I patch up every insecurity I have. So thanks but no thanks...

Take this as you will. I don't think I was "harsh" but then again I guess the truth hurts?...If you're harsh on yourself about hating the skin you're in then I can't comprehend how anything can be anymore harsh than that! Ha. The irony. I'm young as well, but that's not a valid excuse anymore than society supposedly knocking you down to the point of belittling yourself. Little girl, have a great night I came to this side of the forum expecting to see makeup on darker skinned women and this is what I get lol. I'm done!

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by obscuria My family always made remarks about me being too pale, back when I used to never go out in the sun and still made remarks about me being too dark when I would come back from vacation or the beaches. I think they just make these remarks just to criticize for lack of anything else to say. It's a big thing with the Asian culture at least to be as fair as possible and I know a lot of girls that fall for this fair=beautiful stuff and I can see why they might think that but I don't think it is healthy. I was lucky enough not to fall for that because you are born with the skin tone you are born with, so you might as well embrace it. My family no longer criticizes me about my skintone, probably because I've covered up most of my limbs with tattoos that now they are more preoccupied with criticizing that

It is a pretty big thing with the asian culture although I'm not east asian haha.
I should just do what you did, and get tattoos

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real Take this as you will. I don't think I was "harsh" but then again I guess the truth hurts?...If you're harsh on yourself about hating the skin you're in then I can't comprehend how anything can be anymore harsh than that! Ha. The irony. I'm young as well, but that's not a valid excuse anymore than society supposedly knocking you down to the point of belittling yourself. Little girl, have a great night I came to this side of the forum expecting to see makeup on darker skinned women and this is what I get lol. I'm done!

I never said I hated it, I just said sometimes it's hard accepting it. I love the culture, because I see it as exotic, and I like my features. I was just asking if other people had the same issue, which you certainly do not. So thanks but I don't really need a lecture, nor am I trying to be rude. Bye.

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real Exactly, that's just YOU! Your lack of self-esteem is so evident it's see-through.

I personally felt attacked by this... Even if that wasn't your intent.

 

[blazeno.8]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real Anyway, to answer this; I love my skin, love being a Black woman, love everything about myself. I think people should stop this woe is me, wah-wah crap and start loving themselves too. I don't know, I guess I'm just tired of all this moaning and whining. I'm tired of people, period lol. It's funny though, some people are just never happy no matter what. I'm sure if you were a lighter complexion you would then be complaining about wanting to be darker, tis is life. Some people tend to want what they can't have...opposites attract. There would not be so many tanning salons if that were not the case. Anyhow, good luck sulking in misery. A good therapist may be able to help you; book an appointment. I wish you the best, I sincerely do!

Look, I know you might be exhausted by this kind of topic, but there are some people who really need a place to go to talk about these things and criticizing them because you feel a-ok isn't going to help them get the things off their chest that they've been needing to discuss.

 

[blazeno.8]

Joygasm,
If you go into the Deep Thoughts forum and do a search, you might be able to turn up some similar topics with the search function and read up on what people have said in those threads. It might be a nice resource.

 

[Tashona Helena]

There were times I wished I was a wee bit lighter but it was all because of a dude and his self hatred (he hated he was part black basically, long story) and I got caught up in it. But I'm proud to be black. The whole skin color thing can be so confusing. Especially when you go into a drugstore (I totally get your embarrassment buying foundation, they don't make it easy on us) and you only see lighter shades and get frustrated. I think we should all feel blessed though for MAC and other lines recognizing our skin tone and making foundations for everyone. I don't think you being upset means you lack self esteem over all, sometimes it's just a bump in the road, like how one little thing made me start thinking about it. I find my life to be so much easier when I try to focus on just being me and ignore confining to what people think is acceptable for my culture now a days. I think my biggest hurdle is the hair thing, even when I showed people my real hair they still bugged me about not wearing it out even though I'm like, "extensions, lace fronts this is me.." I found myself wondering just why can't be just be who we are without others saying we should be lighter should do this and that. Ugh. Sometimes it's just better to block it all out.

 

[LoveMakeup4Real]

Quote:

Originally Posted by blazeno.8 Look, I know you might be exhausted by this kind of topic, but there are some people who really need a place to go to talk about these things and criticizing them because you feel a-ok isn't going to help them get the things off their chest that they've been needing to discuss.

You don't merit a response, I can't take anyone who makes a comment like this serious---"...but if it's sunny and hot... I run for either shade, a stone building, or a basement."

Really, the sun is that serious? You two seem to suffer from the same problem. Borderline bats. Hide from daylight. Take care, ladies.

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tashona Heléna There were times I wished I was a wee bit lighter but it was all because of a dude and his self hatred (he hated he was part black basically, long story) and I got caught up in it. But I'm proud to be black. The whole skin color thing can be so confusing. Especially when you go into a drugstore (I totally get your embarrassment buying foundation, they don't make it easy on us) and you only see lighter shades and get frustrated. I think we should all feel blessed though for MAC and other lines recognizing our skin tone and making foundations for everyone. I don't think you being upset means you lack self esteem over all, sometimes it's just a bump in the road, like how one little thing made me start thinking about it. I find my life to be so much easier when I try to focus on just being me and ignore confining to what people think is acceptable for my culture now a days. I think my biggest hurdle is the hair thing, even when I showed people my real hair they still bugged me about not wearing it out even though I'm like, "extensions, lace fronts this is me.." I found myself wondering just why can't be just be who we are without others saying we should be lighter should do this and that. Ugh. Sometimes it's just better to block it all out.

I really like what you said, it honestly makes me think about things differently. I like the fact that you said its about being an individual, because I didn't really think of it that way. I feel like I can relate to a lot of what you said, and it sort of helps me look at the positive of it.

 

[joygasm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real You don't merit a response, I can't take anyone who makes a comment like this serious---"...but if it's sunny and hot... I run for either shade, a stone building, or a basement." Really, the sun is that serious? You two seem to suffer from the same problem. Borderline bats. Hide from daylight. Take care, ladies.

And you seem to suffer from arrogance.

 

[blazeno.8]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real You don't merit a response, I can't take anyone who makes a comment like this serious---"...but if it's sunny and hot... I run for either shade, a stone building, or a basement." Really, the sun is that serious? You two seem to suffer from the same problem. Borderline bats. Hide from daylight. Take care, ladies.

Way to take it out of context and twist what I said. I said, it's not the sun, it's the heat. I don't mind cool and sunny or warm and sunny, I mind hot and sunny. Shade is cooler, stone buildings are cold, basements are cool. It seems like you really did come here to start shit with your own agenda.