My heart is shattered

V15U4L_3RR0R

Well-known member
What a childish, nasty little shit he is. I know how bollucks everything feels right now but throw yourself into things and heck, if you can't go out and part on a friday night then bring the party to you like someone else here said. Have a pampering/makeover session with your girlfriends.

A good way of dealing with things is crying in a controlled way. Like stick some sad songs on and have a good cry. Then do something positive afterwards like do housework or some other achievable goal.

I know everything is a little crazy but things will get better. Show those fuckwits how well you can rise from the fall and stay strong.
 

macface

Well-known member
You deserve way better than that piece of shit does not deserve you at all and fuck those stupid fucks how were laughfing at you.
 

lovelyweapon

Well-known member
I'm so, so, honestly sorry to hear that. But I can promise you one thing, one day he'll truly regret it...

As for you, you'll be way over him by then! Been there before sweetheart and if you need ANY support whatsoever you can PM me at any time for support. <3 Sorry you have to go through this, but as they say.. what can't kill you will only make you stronger! You will be proud of yourself when things fall into place. For now, try to keep your mind off of it and stay close to the people that care about you that you know you can trust.
 

xIxSkyDancerxIx

Well-known member
Even if he does come back to you.. DON'T TAKE HIM BACK!!! He's not worth your time or your heart, and like everyone's been saying before.. you deserve someone MUCH better!! I had a terrible ex-boyfriend that just ripped me apart inside and out, and I FINALLY got smart and left even though it hurt like hell. But in the long run everything turn out SOO much better without him.

Go have fun! Hang out with your girlfriends, destroy his car in the middle of the night.. lol j/k j/k. Though if you want to I can teach you have *falls over laughing. You're a strong, beautiful woman.. and he's going to seriously regret losing someone as great as you!
smiles.gif
 

oulala

Well-known member
This is the e-mail I sent him on Saturday:

I'm really impressed. You managed to slam the door shut on us like I never could. So I guess we finally know who really loved the other more now. (long time corny thing between us)

I had no idea you had it in you to be so cruel. On Valentine's Day no less. No wonder you wanted to get me off the phone so fast! My only regret is ever meeting you. Everything from you was just a lie. I'll bet you feel really fucking good for hurting me so badly.

I got your half assed apology on my voicemail. If you ever see me in public, don't say hi. Stay the hell away from me. I'm so proud of you for breaking your promises. That was really nice, the way you all laughed at me. Ha. Ha. Ha.

It's nice how I get pummeled for my mistakes,
(referring to them laughing at me for the secrets he told them) and yet you all just slide off the hook. .... listed off a bunch of stuff he did... Dwaylene and her pics to her baby's daddy and her boss. Your brother for being a **** for no good reason other. I don't even want to know what this new girl of yours is like. I'll bet you two are made for each other.

I wish I could wish you all the best, but I would just be lying.


Did I mention his brother also stole my car to spy on his ex, broke into her apartment, and then his parents begged me not to tell anyone? I feel so bad for being there for him when they split.
 

oulala

Well-known member
His response:

nikki i never wanted to break you heart and everything that i have given you and done was not a lie. i do love you and care about you with all my heart and you know that. i did not want to get off the phone on valentines day. you know me and you know that i never wanted any of this to happen. im very sorry that this all happened like this and i never wanted to hurt you please dont make any of the mistakes tat i made. you are an amasing girl and i am very sorry that i fucked it all up. I AM NOT SEEING THAT GIRL I MADE THAT PROMIS TO YOU AND I AM GOING TO KEEP IT WEATHER YOU BELIEVE ME OR NOT .\

My response to that: (I feel kinda bad for this, but wow did it feel good writing it)

In the next two days you can bring me my Rock Band game AND the money you owe me in exchange for your sega and brother's Halo game, backpack, and whatever else of yours happens to be sitting out in my living room. If you don't, I'm just gonna sell it all. I don't care if I don't make as much money off it as I would if you gave me back my game and money. I'll just be happy to get rid of EVERYTHING that reminds me of you.

Oh yeah, I'll also give you back the jewelry you gave me instead of pawning it all. And anything else I forgot to throw out.

Remember all those cute stuffed animals you won me? They're at their new home in the dump. Yay!

Also - and I know this will probably sway your decision to not give me back my game/money, but I don't care - you aren't gonna get back all the lingerie you bought me. This way you can imagine me sexin' my next boyfriend in all the lingerie that YOU bought me! I'm sure he'll love the school girl outfit even more than you did. And, I'll probably even wear the french maid outfit for him too. Except I'll go find a duster to go with it. He'll be thrilled I'm sure. Don't you think so???.


The lingerie thing because he said if we ever broke up, he wanted it back. I bought him Rock Band for his X-box, complete with the guitar and drumset, as an early V-day gift. Sigh. They won't take it back opened, either...
 

MiCHiE

Well-known member
He's an asshole. And, he can't even spell...But, you already know the things he and his family does. Don't expect anything different when it comes to you. When you hurt the most, be grateful you found out now.
 

TrueRiot

Member
Love sucks. It's a journey to find the right one, and honey...he wasn't the right one.
thmbdn.gif


So why even sell yourself short with someone who is capable of doing this to you? I know it hurts, but whenever a great girl is with a crappy guy, she is missing out on the awesome guys who are ready to give her the love she deserves.

Breakups are very very hard to deal with, and it won't be a quick and easy journey. I find music to be a good way to start the healing process. You have to realize what you want for your life, he's moving on...now it's your turn.

When I was going through a hard breakup, and I wanted to hurt myself...I'd just calm down, lie down and close my eyes. I'd imagine walking on a beach carrying a box of stuff. I stopped at a campfire and began to take items out of the box and burn them in the fire. These items were symbols of my past relationship. One by one they'd go up in flames. One by one I began to erase the heartache. Once the box was empty, I burned the box as well. I stood with my head up high, and continued to walk on the beach, now without that load, I was free. And at the end of the beach was an arena of guys...each one eager to take my hand.
th_DANCE.gif
 

oulala

Well-known member
I know logically what you all say. I agree, 100%. But all I wanna do is e-mail him telling him what a big, fat, stupid asshole he is.

I hate to admit it, but I was hoping he would come into my work today to say sorry. He didn't. I KNOW he doesn't love me but it's so hard to just accept. I want to slash his tires. I want to call him up and yell at him. I want to hug him and have him tell me he loves me. I just wanna pretend none of this ever happened, or go asleep and not wake up.
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I wanna call him, but luckily my pride won't let me. I'd just get laughed at even more.
 

depecher

Well-known member
I'd sell his stuff and go on a MAC shopping spree! heh.

Seriously, you *will* get over this and he will be just a distant memory. The door may have closed on him, but a window was opened for you. You may be just a day away from meeting Mr. Right.

Stay strong.
 

oulala

Well-known member
Oh. My. God.

I want to kill myself.

I called him. He's over me. No shit, huh?

I seriously wanna kill myself.
 

NutMeg

Well-known member
Calm yourself down and think, will this matter to me in a day, a month, or a year? Your life is not over. This moment is horrible, and the next one probably won't be a whole lot better, but you have more moments than this. I know it's hard to care about anything other than the pain and humiliation of this moment, but know that it shall pass. Life and growing up is about learning how to live through these feelings and moments that feel like they will never end. PM me if you need to talk.
 

oulala

Well-known member
I called him, and he's going out with HER RIGHT NOW.

And I fucking BEGGED HIM.

OH MY GOD I WANT TO KILL MYSELF
 

blazeno.8

Well-known member
Hm, I know that I got to a point with my ex and the girl he was going out with that I actually distanced myself from the phone and from any contact that I had with him. I just had a strange falling out with another friend and the thing that helped me was erasing his phone number from my phone and getting rid of any contact information of his that I had.
 

NutMeg

Well-known member
No, you probably shouldn't have. Right now you have to concentrate on yourself and your actions, not him and his. He's not looking out for you, so you have to. Don't lose your dignity or who you are. He can only take from you what you allow him to take.
 

Abhayah15

Member
although i have been through what you are going through there is really nothing i can say to make you truly feel better because i know when i was going through it i didnt want to listen to ANYONE...and i know this is prob the last thing you want to hear but TIME HEALS ANYTHING....its impossible to believe right now but live one day at a time and be grateful for the little pleasures in life and def dont give him the satisfaction of knowing he controls how you feel and live. the most important person in your life should be YOU!
 

oulala

Well-known member
Thank you, both of you, you are right. I just can't believe I did that. How stupid can I be!!!

I've always read things about people doing this. Begging their exes to get back with them. I always thought it was so dumb... now I'm one of those people.
 

NutMeg

Well-known member
It's not so much being stupid as being violently emotional. We've all been there, and most of us have taken it further in that moment than we should have. I've definitely sent a few emails that never should have seen the light of day. I've learned to write it down in Word, rather than in my compose message window. It sounds kind of forced, but if you just sit and write it all out, either by hand or in whatever word processing program you have, it often leaves you feeling like it's all out without feeling like an idiot for contacting whoever has made you that angry. Than you can look at it later, when you've calmed down, to see if it needs to be sent, or if it was just something that you needed to get out. I'm headed to bed now, but feel free to PM me if you need.
 
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