Off Topic: Natural hair...

[Misshopeful24]

I can't believe I never asked this before...
I've been natural for 4 or 5 years now....
My hair is messed up I'd like to believe. Its really coarse in the middle, soft and curly in the back and full blown large curl/strigaht in the front. I texturelized my hair once a yr ago to soften up the over all texture and that has grown out of course. I press out my hair once in a blue moon and it looks nice and permed (easier to manage) the sad thing about is the ends look too thin... but after a while its back to square one...My hair length is, a mixture. The back pastes my neck and one side is longer then the other lol... i use that has a style when i press it out... I have a hard time blow drying my hair (too coarsed lol) and sometimes when i wash it i put treatment in, and twist it to dry of course because once its wash its really soft but it dries HARD/COURSE & THICK...Well i forgot to mention every time i wash my hair which is once a week i trim the ends.

Any Ideas? How can i control the different textured hair? I can't sport the afro, I can't really comb it (i'm 21 soon to be 22 i wanna look mature/elegant I look 16-17) Braids is my excape and braiding it too often is a NO_NO.. i wanna keep my hair line from going bald of course... I'm going to check that website though but any suggestions as to what i can do based on my issues? Who can i trust with my hair issue? it seems the hair dressers think im crazy for fussing over my different combo... So my lesson is to do it myself.

 

[captodometer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misshopeful24 I can't believe I never asked this before... Any Ideas? How can i control the different textured hair? I can't sport the afro, I can't really comb it (i'm 21 soon to be 22 i wanna look mature/elegant I look 16-17) Braids is my excape and braiding it too often is a NO_NO.. i wanna keep my hair line from going bald of course... I'm going to check that website though but any suggestions as to what i can do based on my issues? Who can i trust with my hair issue? it seems the hair dressers think im crazy for fussing over my different combo... So my lesson is to do it myself.

There are salons in the Toronto area that specialize in natural hair if you don't want to do it all yourself. I lived in Rochester, NY until 2 months ago and I looked up the info for these salons every now and then. But I never actually went because I was too lazy to drive across the border to get my hair done

How long is your hair right now? If you trim your ends regularly, in the course of a year you will have cut off less than 6 inches of hair. If your hair is longer than 6 inches, you still have some of the texturized hair, which will be a different texture from the rest of your natural hair. The only way to fix this is to chop of the texturized remnants.

Go for the fro, you will look mature. Not that many teenagers are sporting fros

Most women don't make the decision to go natural until their late 20's onward.

 

[Twinkle_Twinkle]

Having elegant hair doesn't mean it has to be straight hair. That's number one. Number two, stop trying to control your hair. I promise you that it will not work and will only lead to frustration. Many woman have multiple textures and it's just a fact of life. It sounds like what you call "coarse" hair (I really despise that term, sand paper is coarse, and my hair feels like a terry cloth towel, not a nail file. I prefer the term highly textured hair.) It sounds like you hair might be dry and a lot of that could do with the fact that you are pressing it and trying to blow dry it. If the "treatment" you are using is a protein treatment, it is going to dry, not moisturize your hair, and that could be another reason your hair feels hard. Maybe you should refrain from using shampoos with SLS, not all peoples hair can tolerate the harshness of detergents. I would also do a deep contioning treatment once a week, and apply a leave-in after that. And please do check out Nappturality.com. It has more info that we could ever give in this one thread. Good luck to you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misshopeful24 I can't believe I never asked this before... I've been natural for 4 or 5 years now.... My hair is messed up I'd like to believe. Its really coarse in the middle, soft and curly in the back and full blown large curl/strigaht in the front. I texturelized my hair once a yr ago to soften up the over all texture and that has grown out of course. I press out my hair once in a blue moon and it looks nice and permed (easier to manage) the sad thing about is the ends look too thin... but after a while its back to square one...My hair length is, a mixture. The back pastes my neck and one side is longer then the other lol... i use that has a style when i press it out... I have a hard time blow drying my hair (too coarsed lol) and sometimes when i wash it i put treatment in, and twist it to dry of course because once its wash its really soft but it dries HARD/COURSE & THICK...Well i forgot to mention every time i wash my hair which is once a week i trim the ends. Any Ideas? How can i control the different textured hair? I can't sport the afro, I can't really comb it (i'm 21 soon to be 22 i wanna look mature/elegant I look 16-17) Braids is my excape and braiding it too often is a NO_NO.. i wanna keep my hair line from going bald of course... I'm going to check that website though but any suggestions as to what i can do based on my issues? Who can i trust with my hair issue? it seems the hair dressers think im crazy for fussing over my different combo... So my lesson is to do it myself.

 

[Twinkle_Twinkle]

Quote:

Originally Posted by captodometer There are salons in the Toronto area that specialize in natural hair if you don't want to do it all yourself. I lived in Rochester, NY until 2 months ago and I looked up the info for these salons every now and then. But I never actually went because I was too lazy to drive across the border to get my hair done How long is your hair right now? If you trim your ends regularly, in the course of a year you will have cut off less than 6 inches of hair. If your hair is longer than 6 inches, you still have some of the texturized hair, which will be a different texture from the rest of your natural hair. The only way to fix this is to chop of the texturized remnants. Go for the fro, you will look mature. Not that many teenagers are sporting fros Most women don't make the decision to go natural until their late 20's onward.

ITA. After my BC people actually got my age right. Before then, and now, I apparently look(ed) 17. I'm not complaining though.

 

[aziza]

I had no idea there were so many natural heads on the board...it's a nice surprise!

Anyway I agree with everything Twinkle_Twinkle stated. For the record I wear my hair in some type of 'fro almost constantly and I think I look my age.

 

[MsCuppyCakes]

Deleted.

 

[Misshopeful24]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Twinkle_Twinkle Having elegant hair doesn't mean it has to be straight hair. That's number one. Number two, stop trying to control your hair. I promise you that it will not work and will only lead to frustration. Many woman have multiple textures and it's just a fact of life. It sounds like what you call "coarse" hair (I really despise that term, sand paper is coarse, and my hair feels like a terry cloth towel, not a nail file. I prefer the term highly textured hair.) It sounds like you hair might be dry and a lot of that could do with the fact that you are pressing it and trying to blow dry it. If the "treatment" you are using is a protein treatment, it is going to dry, not moisturize your hair, and that could be another reason your hair feels hard. Maybe you should refrain from using shampoos with SLS, not all peoples hair can tolerate the harshness of detergents. I would also do a deep contioning treatment once a week, and apply a leave-in after that. And please do check out Nappturality.com. It has more info that we could ever give in this one thread. Good luck to you.

I wasn't really talking about straight hair. and yes you are right im guilty of trying to control my hair. I was just trying to say that its difficult to do anything with the different texture like i said the front is "permed looking. the middle thick and the back soft and curly.Its not easy to pull off the fro. the best part of the fro is the back. plus due to my situation that I have a hearing loss and I have to wear a device in the position behind my ear it isn't easy to keep it on due to the thickness. I will check out that website and find out what exactly i should do, shampoo wise, and deep contioning.

 

[PhonyBaloney500]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misshopeful24 I wasn't really talking about straight hair. and yes you are right im guilty of trying to control my hair. I was just trying to say that its difficult to do anything with the different texture like i said the front is "permed looking. the middle thick and the back soft and curly.Its not easy to pull off the fro. the best part of the fro is the back. plus due to my situation that I have a hearing loss and I have to wear a device in the position behind my ear it isn't easy to keep it on due to the thickness. I will check out that website and find out what exactly i should do, shampoo wise, and deep contioning.

Have you tried twists? That way the texture will look consistent and you can do something aside from braids!

 

[AfricanaEyes]

I love the natural-ness!!!

Goin' on almost 3 years....soon to be locin' it up!

 

[NaturalSister19]

Yes, to all of the positive comments and great advice here.

As a natural 'old head', 20 years in March 2007 - I know one thing for sure...many of us STILL don't regard our hair in its natural state very highly.

This is an excerpt from my book (in progress):

______

What is most important is that people change how they feel about what natural hair looks/acts, and styles like across the board. Perceptions about so called appropriateness as related to work-places and etc have to be changed.

A new way of thinking has to be adopted, - You have to become comfortable with the options that wearing natural hair offers. Natural hair has to stand on its own in terms of how textures and styles are viewed. Wearing your hair naturally cannot be compared to straightened hair.
Textures, curls, kinks and the like stand on their own and one has many, many ways to achieve beautiful styles if you come to love how your hair behaves in it's natural state.

A successful approach to going natural has to include a certain frame of thought:

The natural hair standard of beauty is its own and should not be weighed against straight hair because of all of the negative history behind why we thought for so long [many still think], that our hair in its natural state was not good enough, or attractive enough to be showcased and loved, admired, and esteemed as beautiful in its uniqueness.

In the first 8 months of 2003, I did a lot of travelling. So I decided to conduct an experiment. This is how it went.

I went to shopping malls frequented by African-Americans and other people of color. I allotted myself a 3 hour slot to sit and observe how women of African descent styled their hair. My focus was on hair with extensions. I allowed for inaccuracies in case I could have been wrong, but I know I have a very good eye. I would document the hair state of the first 100 women (all ages and income brackets) that went by during peak shopping hours (3pm-6pm on weekends). The cities went as such:

Detroit - 72 of 100 wore weave, braids, or some other form of extension
Atlanta - 77 of 100 wore weave, braids, or some other form of extension
Washington, DC - 31 of 100...
Los Angeles - 69 of 100...
Chicago - 57 of 100...
Philadelphia - 34 of 100...
NYC - 24 of 100...
Detroit again 4 months later - 78 of 100...

Through this experiment, I concluded that there is a huge problem - us and our self-esteem as related to hair.
______

I plan to conduct this experiment again within the next year or so because I will travel to 5 of those cities again.

 

[amourbliss]

woohoo for the natural hair!! I'm currently on my 2nd year and loving it more than the first! I also suggest nappturality.com everythingi know has come from the site and those awesome ladies!!

 

[NaturallyME]

Ladies we tend to take ourselves a little too seriously when it comes to our hair. Now i personally know when i decided to go natural it was more about health and working with what i've got than anything.I wanted to do something different and being from the south this was very different for me (and the people around me). I jus think its a personal preference(relaxed or natural) and we should all just do what makes us happy it doesnt have to be a political issue jus a personal preference.


i personally love to see that sistah walkin down the street rockin her fro' ta death
but i also love to see a sistah with straight, shiny hair working that.

The big positive with being a natural though is if u want that straight hair for a few days you can do that but theres no oppurtunity for relaxed heads to do the same.

sorry so long...

 

[MsCuppyCakes]

I love this thread. I, this is embarrassing, have a lovely bald spot. I've taken several test to try and figure out why. I believe its stress. So I try not to put any chemicals on my hair as I know that won't help it grow. I'm really nervous about cutting/shaving it really short because I feel I won't look feminine. I'm not a vain person but I really miss my hair and being able to style it differently. Now I wear slicked back, usually with a head band. Any suggestions would be great. Thanks ladies.

 

[MACa6325xi]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsCuppyCakes I love this thread. I, this is embarrassing, have a lovely bald spot. I've taken several test to try and figure out why. I believe its stress. So I try not to put any chemicals on my hair as I know that won't help it grow. I'm really nervous about cutting/shaving it really short because I feel I won't look feminine. I'm not a vain person but I really miss my hair and being able to style it differently. Now I wear slicked back, usually with a head band. Any suggestions would be great. Thanks ladies.

I have had the same problem. I think mine is hereditary, my mother, and aunts suffer from this too. I do not have natural hair. My mother does have natural hair with no chemicals. She told me to buy some "Doo Gro." I bought the oil and my hair is doing better. I think because of my age, this could be a problem that I will have to live with. I have stopped worrying about my hair because I have seen women bald from Chemo and radiation. As long as I have my health, my hair is secondary. I can always buy a wig. LOL. Stresss can be another reason for hair loss. Let go and let god. Best of luck to you and you are not alone.

 

[MsCuppyCakes]

Thanks. That was very kind of you to respond to my post. My doctor explored my background and it's not hereditary. I think I may take the plunge and cut it. I don't want to wear a wig, get braids or a weave because I think it will just aggrevate my scalp. I believe if I let it breathe and take care of my scalp it will grow back. I just want to look more polished.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MACa6325xi I have had the same problem. I think mine is hereditary, my mother, and aunts suffer from this too. I do not have natural hair. My mother does have natural hair with no chemicals. She told me to buy some "Doo Gro." I bought the oil and my hair is doing better. I think because of my age, this could be a problem that I will have to live with. I have stopped worrying about my hair because I have seen women bald from Chemo and radiation. As long as I have my health, my hair is secondary. I can always buy a wig. LOL. Stresss can be another reason for hair loss. Let go and let god. Best of luck to you and you are not alone.

 

[MACa6325xi]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsCuppyCakes Thanks. That was very kind of you to respond to my post. My doctor explored my background and it's not hereditary. I think I may take the plunge and cut it. I don't want to wear a wig, get braids or a weave because I think it will just aggrevate my scalp. I believe if I let it breathe and take care of my scalp it will grow back. I just want to look more polished.

I know how you feel. You don't have to cut it all off at the same time. You can cut a little every time you trim. Then you can explore different styles. Also you can try some Aphogee Intense Conditioner ( I forgot what it's really called). It's sold at Sally or any beauty supply store. Girl, not only did I have a "slick" spot, my hair was shedding some terrible. This Aphogee stopped the shedding. Have you explored any hair vitamins, etc.

 

[MsCuppyCakes]

That's a good idea, but, my bald spot is on the crown/center of my head. So my sides and back are long, I almost feel like if I let it grow out a little more I can do a combver,

. But I'm not. I just want to be able to do something with it. I have tried Centrum's Liquid Multivitamin, GNC's, Hair, Nails and Skin vitamins but I'm horrible at being consistent. I will try Aphogee.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MACa6325xi I know how you feel. You don't have to cut it all off at the same time. You can cut a little every time you trim. Then you can explore different styles. Also you can try some Aphogee Intense Conditioner ( I forgot what it's really called). It's sold at Sally or any beauty supply store. Girl, not only did I have a "slick" spot, my hair was shedding some terrible. This Aphogee stopped the shedding. Have you explored any hair vitamins, etc.

 

[Perple1]

Hi ladies ~ I wanted to add my two cents here. I went natural 2 years ago at the urging of my hairdresser. She helped me realize that I DID NOT need to put chemical straighteners in my hair. My twin has naturally curly hair, my mother and grandmother's hair is fine, wavy. Gma's hair was almost waistlength - she never used relaxers (too expensive! she'd proclaim...she was in Jamaica...they kinda were).
Old habits are hard to break. I didn't think I 'had the type of hair' my family members did and told myself I 'needed' the relaxer. I transitioned without cutting my hair off to a TWA (I too am not a fan -- my head would look ridiculously large!). I washed it and threw it back in a ponytail or bun for quite a while. Partly because I was afraid to get in there and play with it, partly because my husband likes when I wear my hair pulled back

Anyway, I invested in great products (Carol's daughter Healthy Hair Butter, Aveda Elixir, Unrefined Shea Butter, African Black Soap) and a kick-ass flat iron (HAI to replace my CHI) and blowdryer (Yea Yellow Bird!). I wash my hair 1-2x/week and 'straighten' with the dryer and flatiron. I do wrap my hair at night (downside) but it stays smooth for days! I wish I wasn't so hard-headed when my hairdresser first encouraged me. She must have known what she was talking about and TRULY wanted me to take good care of my hair -- she lost $$$, I do my hair at home 90% of the time. I'll go in for trims every 8 weeks!

I am now at the point where I can wear my hair natural after I wash it. I'm so used to it being straight that I usually wear it this way, but having the option (time crunches, vacation) is kinda nice.

I say all of this to make a point to others who may stop by and visit this thread. "Going natural" does not have to mean wearing locs, dreads, braids or afros. As stated previously, preference and hair health are KEY no matter HOW you choose to wear it. We're all beautiful and our differences make it so!

 

[Twinkle_Twinkle]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsCuppyCakes I love this thread. I, this is embarrassing, have a lovely bald spot. I've taken several test to try and figure out why. I believe its stress. So I try not to put any chemicals on my hair as I know that won't help it grow. I'm really nervous about cutting/shaving it really short because I feel I won't look feminine. I'm not a vain person but I really miss my hair and being able to style it differently. Now I wear slicked back, usually with a head band. Any suggestions would be great. Thanks ladies.

You could try Moe's hair growth oil. My temples are a bit thin, but I've noticed improvement since using the oil. Here is the link to her Fotki.
http://public.fotki.com/newmoe1/

 

[AfricanaEyes]

I've used Moe's hair oil too and my temples are getting soooo much better.

And you're very right, Perple. For the first time in almost 3 years I straightened my natural hair and the straight hair wasn't soooo bad. 3 days later and I got a serious Angela Davis fro. My hair just can't stay straight and I'm more than comfortable with that.

But I used to always think being natural meant locs, fros and "obvious" natural styles. Now I'm starting to recognize that being natural means taking care of your hair minus the chemicals.....and whether you choose to loc it or straighten.....it's still fab! I prefer the fro/twists look and I'll be locin' soon but to each her own.

It ain't no surprise that sistas can pull off anything anyway.
We are beautiful!
:dancey: