Really Embarrassing Sex Problems

[CantAffordMAC]

Okay so this is a long and embarrassing story of mine. I wasn't going to tell it, but I decided to.

Last October or November, my boyfriend began noticing like, white stuff on his penis after we'd have sex. I never really noticed anything abnormal going on down there. We assumed it was a yeast infection. I started taking over the counter medications for it. It never helped, and the discharge was still there.

I began going to clinics and doctor's offices to find out what was wrong and to get some precription medicine for the infection. The clinic told me that they swabbed for a yeast infection and that I had moderate yeast present. They gave me the one time only pill, and the discharge decreased for maybe 4 days, then came back. Then the clinic gave me prescription cream for the infection, and it didn't work. I went to a gynecologist and she looked at me down there and said it was definetly yeast, and to start washing with undyed/unscented soap, and use undyed/unscented laundry detergent for my underwear. (and gave me the one time only pill)

None of these things helped. I then went back to the same doctor's office, and saw a different doctor. She said that many doctors assume that discharge is yeast and they never really check to make sure. She looked at the swab under the microscope and said there was no yeast, I just had regular discharge and that I should try to go back on birth control and see if the hormones will help decrease the discharge. So I did.

It doesn't stink, I don't itch....its just white and kind of clumpy and it ends up mostly on my boyfriend after sex. I've been tested for STD's and everything says I'm fine.

My sex life has not been so good. I perform oral for my boyfriend all the time (I don't mind) and he hasn't given me oral for over a year now because of what we thought was a yeast infection. Even now that the doctor said I'm healthy and normal, we haven't done it. And I can't say that i blame him, because thats nasty. I feel dirty because of this, and no matter what I try, nothing works. I'm self conscious in bed and we still do fun stuff in bed but when it comes to him looking at me down there or me having my legs open I feel gross because I feel like he can see it and I just feel uncomfortable. I don't get wet anymore, probably because I'm self conscious, and that can cause sex to hurt for me sometimes. Sometimes we'll use lube, which neither one of us really likes using. He has given me oral a couple times by using plastic wrap on top of me but it doesn't feel good at all.

Its just like, wow my boyfriend and I can't even do regular things during sex because of a problem that I'm having. I just want our sex life to be normal..and even when this problem goes away I would feel weird asking him to go down there. Like he's doing me a favor by doing it for me. Like "I'm finally clean, now can you give me oral? Please?" Ummm how bout no? I just feel like that aspect of our sex life has been ruined in a way...

Any advice, help, suggestions?

 

[BeautyPsycho]

You can try going to a different Dr. and telling him/ her that you really want to get rid of it. However, my Dr told me that some of us just have more discharge than others, its normal, its ok, there is nothing you can do about it.. its just there..

I think you should talk with your boyfriend, tell him its not a disease or anything like that, ask him if he's grossed out by it... I mean, its your body... if he loves you.. I dunno... I mean, when you get wet, it's not chocolate neither lol

I don't think its very different, no?
You can take a shower before oral, and make sure there's nothing there and it probably doesn't go all the time, just from time to time...

You probably can't do anything about it, so talk w/ you boy.



good luck.

 

[SparklingWaves]

This is going to sound strange, but do you eat a lot of candy or take baths instead of showers?

 

[BeautyPsycho]

Yup, a lot of sugar= yeast infection.

Also, no tight clothing and wear white, cotton panties.

 

[sitasati]

are you sure the "white stuff" after sex isn't just you ejaculating? But you did say you don't get "wet" so may be it is not. Wow this is difficult to answer. I have had white discharge for a while now ..but when I was in a relationship and I had sex...it was never on his penis. (There i said it im not a virgin. I was pretending to be a born again virgin lol)I had it even then.

Also, you should NOT feel dirty cause you are not. The vagina cleans itself out and it is one of the most cleanest parts on your body. So honestly I think you should talk to ur bf and tell him how you feel becaus if you continue to feel this way and not say anything it might fester. goodluck ((hugs))

OH and with age your hormones will change and your body will go through many changes.

 

[SparklingWaves]

Are you have itching, swelling, or redness that goes along with yeast infections? If so, there are many things you can try to prevent them. This isn't uncommon at all.

 

[breechan]

Why not try sex in the shower, or shower together followed by sex. He can give you oral while water is running over the area as well.

I'm sure he loves you honey, and will be willing to work this through with you.

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by SparklingWaves This is going to sound strange, but do you eat a lot of candy or take baths instead of showers?

No. I don't do anything that would really cause an infection like that...I've heard all the rules for a woman not to get an infection lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeautyPsycho Yup, a lot of sugar= yeast infection. Also, no tight clothing and wear white, cotton panties.

Yeah I don't really wear tight clothes or any of that. Like I said, I was told it wasn't a yeast infection. Just "normal" discharge. Even though it came out of nowhere one day and has been here for a year.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sitasati are you sure the "white stuff" after sex isn't just you ejaculating? But you did say you don't get "wet" so may be it is not. Wow this is difficult to answer. I have had white discharge for a while now ..but when I was in a relationship and I had sex...it was never on his penis. (There i said it im not a virgin. I was pretending to be a born again virgin lol)I had it even then. Also, you should NOT feel dirty cause you are not. The vagina cleans itself out and it is one of the most cleanest parts on your body. So honestly I think you should talk to ur bf and tell him how you feel becaus if you continue to feel this way and not say anything it might fester. goodluck ((hugs)) OH and with age your hormones will change and your body will go through many changes.

No its not ejaculate or anything. I thought of that too, like maybe its just juices lol, but I don't think so. I don't orgasm through sex so it would have to be just...stuff. I don't think thats what it is though. I really hope that my body is just changing but it needs to hurry up and go back to normal because I don't understand where this came from.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SparklingWaves Are you have itching, swelling, or redness that goes along with yeast infections? If so, there are many things you can try to prevent them. This isn't uncommon at all.

Yeah I know that yeast infections are common. But I was told that this wasn't a yeast infection (hence, why all that medication and stuff wasn't working) I have no itching, swelling, redness--none of that. I thought it was an infection for like 8 months and I wasn't wearing tight clothes, was washing with the right soap, taking the best care of myself and it hasn't made a difference.

 

[SparklingWaves]

If this is happening one - two weeks prior to your period, you may be ovulating. When the discharge gets thinner, this is indicating a time that you are more vertile. It might be a good idea to keep track of it on a calendar to see if this is the case. See if you notice patterns with your cycle.

Note: It's not uncommon for women to ovulate more than one time per month.

 

[Briar]

Oh honey, I'm so sorry that what sounds like a normal bodily function has you feeling so down about yourself. This is really hard. I think you should talk with your boyfriend. Be frank and honest about how you feel about yourself and this issue.

And if he's the one making this out to be dirty, gross or unnatural than he's got a problem, not you.

Also: Has he been checked out? If the discharge is only showing up after intercourse with him, its possible its part of his ejaculate and not from you at all.

 

[nunu]

I would reccomend you see another doctor and tell her/him that you really want it out of your system and that you tried so many things and it doesn't go.
You are not dirty this is common between women.
Good luck hun
x

 

[rosenbud]

This is a really common problem amongst women, I had a friend who had the exact same problem.
First of all I would start doing vaginal douches, easy to do in the bath, with a weak Tea Tree essential oil solution, the Tea Tree Oil kills yeast if there is any there and anything else.
It sounds as though you have a bacteria imbalance.
The most important is diet, the correct diet will flush your system, cutting out all sugar, yeast foods (bread), alcohol for a month will stop your system from feeding on any bacteria hence making the problem worse.
Eat lots of salads, vegetables, protiens, Brown rice, pulses, beans, fruit, etc
Drink mucho water to flush your system and herbal teas.
After a month I am more than certain that your vaginal juices will be flowing clear

 

[kimmy]

your body cleanses itself on a regular basis. some people produce more discharge than others, based on their hormone levels. it isn't anything unnatural, gross or irregular. i'm sure your boyfriend would understand if you put it to him that way. it's just your body keeping itself clean. it isn't going to hurt him, it isn't diseased or anything.

starting birth control may help the "problem" slightly...but i don't know how much. try asking your obgyn about the birth control and see what s/he says.

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by SparklingWaves If this is happening one - two weeks prior to your period, you may be ovulating. When the discharge gets thinner, this is indicating a time that you are more vertile. It might be a good idea to keep track of it on a calendar to see if this is the case. See if you notice patterns with your cycle. Note: It's not uncommon for women to ovulate more than one time per month.

Its everyday. And everytime we have sex. No matter what I do.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Briar Oh honey, I'm so sorry that what sounds like a normal bodily function has you feeling so down about yourself. This is really hard. I think you should talk with your boyfriend. Be frank and honest about how you feel about yourself and this issue. And if he's the one making this out to be dirty, gross or unnatural than he's got a problem, not you. Also: Has he been checked out? If the discharge is only showing up after intercourse with him, its possible its part of his ejaculate and not from you at all.

Aww thanks. I talk to my boyfriend about it but nothing ever happens after that. I just think we won't be doing that for a long long time. Its not even that I want him to do it because it feels good, its more so the fact that I'd like us to have the option whether we want to do it or not.you know?

He's been checked out, he was fine. He doesn't ejaculate in me so I don't think its him.

Quote:

Originally Posted by rosenbud This is a really common problem amongst women, I had a friend who had the exact same problem. First of all I would start doing vaginal douches, easy to do in the bath, with a weak Tea Tree essential oil solution, the Tea Tree Oil kills yeast if there is any there and anything else. It sounds as though you have a bacteria imbalance. The most important is diet, the correct diet will flush your system, cutting out all sugar, yeast foods (bread), alcohol for a month will stop your system from feeding on any bacteria hence making the problem worse. Eat lots of salads, vegetables, protiens, Brown rice, pulses, beans, fruit, etc Drink mucho water to flush your system and herbal teas. After a month I am more than certain that your vaginal juices will be flowing clear

Thanks for the suggestions. I'm not really willing to douche...unless it came from a doctor that thats what I should do. I've never heard anything positive about douching--ever. But I definetly should work on my diet.

 

[Girl about town]

Hi you sound normal to me, i think the problem may be hormone levels due to the contraceptive pill, every month when a woman ovulates discharge goes white and thick like egg white,or if you are on the pill, some pills thicken cervical secretions to prevent pregnancy as well as stopping egg production,so this may be the problem, i think most people have tghe same problem x

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl about town Hi you sound normal to me, i think the problem may be hormone levels due to the contraceptive pill, every month when a woman ovulates discharge goes white and thick like egg white,or if you are on the pill, some pills thicken cervical secretions to prevent pregnancy as well as stopping egg production,so this may be the problem, i think most people have tghe same problem x

but I'm not on birth control. I haven't taken the pill in a year and a half. I was on nuvaring a few times this year but it never made a difference.

 

[xIxSkyDancerxIx]

I think it's your normal discharge. My discharge is pretty thick (well i think it is lol) and it got thicker after I went on the pill. But it's probably just your normal discharge and it's how your body gets rid of the bacteria and stuff down there so you don't get a real infection.

Talk to your boyfriend about it and reassure him it's not an infection, and I agree with the taking a shower before having sex. Then it'll be cleaner and then maybe your boyfriend won't be so "ewwed" out. lol.

*huggs. Good luck sweetie. Just be happy knowing that you DON'T have an infection or something serious.

 

[lizsybarite]

I think it's most likely just your normal fluids, although they may be thicker and more whitish because you're not as well hydrated - I know that my own level of hydration makes a big difference. I never seem to be drinking enough water!

But if there's no smell, itching or irritation, there's probably nothing to worry about.

And for the love of God, don't douche!!

 

[CantAffordMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by lizsybarite I think it's most likely just your normal fluids, although they may be thicker and more whitish because you're not as well hydrated - I know that my own level of hydration makes a big difference. I never seem to be drinking enough water! But if there's no smell, itching or irritation, there's probably nothing to worry about. And for the love of God, don't douche!!

lol thank you. I don't seem to drink enough water either, but thats been throughout my whole life. Maybe its just now catching up to me. I will definetly do that.

I'm not going to douche lol.

 

[V15U4L_3RR0R]

Sounds normal to me. Could be a change in hormones which is a common thing as you get older. My discharge is similar but it tends to get a little thicker during the week before my period. To be honest I wouldn't worry. Sounds like you've done all the right things anyway. When you've gone to the loo make sure you wipe front to back and all the other things that have been mentioned which you seem to be doing anyway. I don't think you can do much more to be honest. STI tests are pretty accurate and from what you've described it certainly doesn't sound like thrush.

The only other thing I can think of is if you use anything down there like any kind of soap whether it be unscented or not. You could just be a little dry and your body is compensating. Douching or any other kind of cleaning down there is simply not necessary at all and can cause more problems than it solves. Don't use anything but water down there and your body does the rest as discharge is simply a self cleaning mechanism.

If you're feeling self conscious then you can always have a quick wipe down there before hand and definitely talk to your partner about how you feel about it and what things you can do to help the situation. You are by no means dirty or anything like that. You're just a woman

Let us know how you get on anyway and if you find a solution that works for you. Also just to add that I agree with drinking more water and see if that helps?