Boob Nazis, Bottle feeders, and discretionary tactics
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Kimberleigh
Well-known member
I guess in about 5 months I'm going to need to be making these decisions, but if I had to guess now, and just for my personal preference, I might breastfeed at home and express milk for "outings". I may not even breastfeed; I do intend on giving it a shot, but I have my own hang ups about my boobs; the thought of even accidently exposing myself while breastfeeding is absolutely mortifying. To each their own...
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Re: Children -- yay or nay?
Quote:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-refs.html
Children usually wean themselves around 2 or 3 years of age.
But please read the above.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raerae
I'd sure like to know them... Please explain to me how my future three or four year old will benefit from me breastfeeding for 3+ years? And when should I make him/her stop? 5? 6? 7? 8? 9? 10? |
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-refs.html
Children usually wean themselves around 2 or 3 years of age.
But please read the above.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Re: Children -- yay or nay?
Quote:
My child's needs come before your wants or desires or whether or not breastfeeding offends you. Some children do not like blankets over their heads. And sometimes there is not a private place to nurse in. When I am in public, I try to find a private spot but if I cannot, I WILL feed my child. You do not have to look.
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| Originally Posted by Raerae
Thats really the attutude that I think causes this type of polarization of the issue. There are LOTS of things are are LEGAL and protected by LAW that make others incomfortable. But as considerate people living in a community, we put aside some of our personal liberties when in public space. It's also perfectly legal for me to take pictures of you in public, breastfeeding, and post them all over the internet. I'm sorry if that would make you uncomfortable. You might not like my amateur paparatzi photography, but THE LAW protects me and there is NOTHING you can do about it. I mean seriously. Thats why this country is so f'd up and sue happy. People have stoped careing about the community, and only care about themselves as an individual. And when asked to bend a little because they are in public, they start crying that their personal liberties are being violated. And we wonder why this country is so divided on racial and cultural lines. But thats a completely different topic. |
My child's needs come before your wants or desires or whether or not breastfeeding offends you. Some children do not like blankets over their heads. And sometimes there is not a private place to nurse in. When I am in public, I try to find a private spot but if I cannot, I WILL feed my child. You do not have to look.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
If you can see the nipple, then you are looking too hard.
| Originally Posted by Raerae
Not really Shimmer. Mothers who breastfeed in non discrete ways in public are by FAR the minority. It's not as if you see overly exposed women breastfeeding on a daily basis. Which is the point all the pro public feeders seem to consistantly ignore, even though all of them who breastfeed have indicated that they have used a blanket or done it as privateley as possible. I've stated time and time again, discrete public feeding is FINE. It's the blatent disregard to even attempt to cover up that I'm protesting. I'm sorry Shimmer, but breastfeeding or not, I don't want to see your engorged breasts/nipples in public. It has nothing to do with the baby eating and everything to do with showing yourself like that publicly is gross. Just because your lactating doesn't suddenly make it ok to put yourself all out there for everyone. I dont want to be eating in a restaruant as you flash everyone in sight because you have an urgent need to breastfeed at the dinner table. There is no reason that can't wait till after you leave the restaraunt, the baby isn't going to starve if you wait another 15 minutes to feed it. I'm not saying don't breastfeed. I'm saying, when you do it, take into consideration everyone else around you. Because when you choose to do this, you need to understand that it's NOT a common sight, and it does make a lot of people uncomfortable. So if you are planning on doing it, be discrete, and use a little common sense on the locations you decide to do it in. |
If you can see the nipple, then you are looking too hard.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
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That's right. Making a child wait for 15 minutes to eat is torture for them and for everyone around.
| Originally Posted by Jade
"There is no reason that can't wait till after you leave the restaraunt, the baby isn't going to starve if you wait another 15 minutes to feed it. " Have you ever heard a screaming baby when they want to eat? When they want it, they want it now. And I would think that the majority of people in a resteraunt would rather not hear a screaming,hungry baby than see a boob. Most mothers cover up anyways when they do this. If you don't like it then don't look. But the baby has to eat for gods sake. |
That's right. Making a child wait for 15 minutes to eat is torture for them and for everyone around.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Where would you suggest a woman to feed her baby? In the bathroom? No. I don't eat in the bathroom and neither will my child.
| Originally Posted by Raerae
So don't do it at the table? Seems like a pretty easy solution. Just because legally you can do it wherever, doesn't mean you should. Thats the point. |
Where would you suggest a woman to feed her baby? In the bathroom? No. I don't eat in the bathroom and neither will my child.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Are you seriously comparing breastfeeding to Britney's "naughty bitz"???
Uh, no.
| Originally Posted by Raerae
I think it really depends on who's boobs your talking about lol. Just because it's common anatomy doesn't mean we all want to see it. We all have Vajayjay's too, but it doesn't mean we should all go pull a Britney and flash our naughty bitz every chance we get. |
Are you seriously comparing breastfeeding to Britney's "naughty bitz"???
Uh, no.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Wow! That's sooo incredibly selfish on your part. YOU don't have to look at a breastfeeding woman. Look away!! Is there a reason that you would stare?
| Originally Posted by Raerae
Maybe you should have fed your baby before you came in then, or left the infant at home with a sitter. If the baby is that young to where your still breastfeeding, it probably shouldn't be at a restaraunt anyways. And i'm paying for food too, not for breasts. |
Wow! That's sooo incredibly selfish on your part. YOU don't have to look at a breastfeeding woman. Look away!! Is there a reason that you would stare?
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Women are hardly topless when they breastfeed.
Your ignorance on the subject of breastfeeding and public breastfeeding astounds me.
| Originally Posted by Raerae
It's kinda like a trainwreck, it's hard to look away the way some people do it. And if the woman doing it is being really obvious, chances are I'm going to point it out to all my friends, so they can see too. I mean seriously. It's not every day you get to see topless moms with both breasts bared in public giving the evil eye to everyone around them. It's not like everyone around you is baring their breasts, of course people are going to stare. |
Women are hardly topless when they breastfeed.
Your ignorance on the subject of breastfeeding and public breastfeeding astounds me.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Feeding a child and changing their diaper ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.
Wow.
| Originally Posted by Raerae
Chances are, if she's facing the other direction, tables away, i'm not going to know she's breastfeeding, so I'm not going to care. Again, you use an example of someone being discrete. This isn't about discrete breastfeeding. I take it you'd be OK with someone changing a diaper on the restaruant table too at dinner time right? Afterall, it's natural. |
Feeding a child and changing their diaper ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.
Wow.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
YOU don't have to stare or look for that matter. Why don't you go eat in the bathroom. If it's good enough for my child, then you take your plate and sit on the toilet and eat in there.
| Originally Posted by lipstickandhate
I didn't read this entire thread but are the pro-public breast feeders in favor of blankets or what? I don't really buy this "its natural, so its fine in public!" stuff. It's natural to have to have to go to the bathroom but you can't do it wherever and whenever you damn well please. That, however, may be more of a public health issue. I have no problem with mother's breast-feeding in public AT ALL, but I'd appreciate a) either a little warning before you whip the breast out or b) a little covering. I didn't have children, I don't know why I should have to stare at a milky nipple while I'm eating. Its fine if you want to do it, but please, you're not paying for my dinner. I know, I know, "you don't have to look." Please, everybody looks. Also, "the bathroom is dirty and a bad place for a meal". Yeah so is the subway in Brooklyn, the Petites section at Macys and a bus stop in Midtown. Come on. |
YOU don't have to stare or look for that matter. Why don't you go eat in the bathroom. If it's good enough for my child, then you take your plate and sit on the toilet and eat in there.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Again, a very ignorant statement. There are many benefits to extended breastfeeding and I posted a link up above. Please read it.
| Originally Posted by lipstickandhate
And finally, I cannot see breast-feeding a 3 year old. Honestly, I'd be inclined to report that person to the authorities. |
Again, a very ignorant statement. There are many benefits to extended breastfeeding and I posted a link up above. Please read it.
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
Pumps are for whatever you use them for. I pump so when I got o work, my husband can feed my baby and I pump to keep up my milk supply when I'm at work because breastmilk is on demand. If you don't nurse or pump, your supply will begint o diminish.
| Originally Posted by MxAxC-_ATTACK
I was breast fed, as was my brother, but my mom Never did it in public, thats what pumps are for. I personally would be extremely embarrassed to whip out my Teet in public, I don't often see a whole boob in public , usually moms cover themselves up with a blanket, and shove the little bambino under there. But even with a baby, you whip out your whole milk-jug and someone is gonna do a double take. what do you expect ? |
Pumps are for whatever you use them for. I pump so when I got o work, my husband can feed my baby and I pump to keep up my milk supply when I'm at work because breastmilk is on demand. If you don't nurse or pump, your supply will begint o diminish.
Beauty Mark
Well-known member
I don't think most women, at least from what I've seen, are whipping out their tit and being like "Hey world, come gawk!" I'd have an issue with that, but I have an issue with attention whores in general. My friend, who isn't exactly flat, breastfed her kid, and I couldn't see really anything during the act of breastfeeding, just her kid's head and a tad bit of her breast, which would probably have been reveal by a shirt anyway.
I will admit it's surprising if you're not used it. But I think it should be handled like if you see someone who has Tammy Faye makeup. You look, you're surprised, and you move on.
I will admit it's surprising if you're not used it. But I think it should be handled like if you see someone who has Tammy Faye makeup. You look, you're surprised, and you move on.
*Stargazer*
Well-known member
The only problem with saying that women could just pump or bottle feed expressed milk is that many babies won't take a bottle (my second was just like that, never once took a bottle even when I was in surgery for hours having my gall bladder removed) and some women can't pump or express. So for some women and some babies, there is no choice but straight from the source. It is also not as easy as just "leaving the kid with a sitter." It is also not always feasible to use a blanket to cover the baby. I don't find it surprising that a lot of the statements like this are coming from people without children. Because honestly, until you have children parenting is little more than a theory LOL
I breastfeed my children, when they are babies, whereever and whenever they need to be fed. I try my best to plan my day so that I don't have to do it while out and about, but the best laid plans... That said, while I fully believe in exercising my legal rights to breastfeed in public, I do it discreetly and most of the time you wouldn't even notice. In fact, most nursing mothers are the same. It is a very small (and vocal) minority that does it indiscreetly and I firmly believe that most of that stems from an attention whore, selfish "my rights are the only valid rights" viewpoint.
And extended breastfeeding creeps me the hell out. The WHO recommends nursing until 2. Personally, in a first world country, I find it unnecessary to breastfeed past 12 months. (Or whenever you can get the clingy little bugger weaned - my second wouldn't give up the boob until 13 months despite my best efforts). The two year recommendation comes from the fact that in many places around the world it IS beneficial for a child to continue nursing until 2 for nutritional purposes and for birth control purposes (fallible though it is) for the mother.
The women that are still nursing older children in industrialized countries scare me. Everytime I see an instance of it, it is because the mother is completely wacked in the head and unable to give up their status as giver of life and nutrition. Case in point : one of the creepiest things I've ever watched. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHRyRCHuQ7g
I breastfeed my children, when they are babies, whereever and whenever they need to be fed. I try my best to plan my day so that I don't have to do it while out and about, but the best laid plans... That said, while I fully believe in exercising my legal rights to breastfeed in public, I do it discreetly and most of the time you wouldn't even notice. In fact, most nursing mothers are the same. It is a very small (and vocal) minority that does it indiscreetly and I firmly believe that most of that stems from an attention whore, selfish "my rights are the only valid rights" viewpoint.
And extended breastfeeding creeps me the hell out. The WHO recommends nursing until 2. Personally, in a first world country, I find it unnecessary to breastfeed past 12 months. (Or whenever you can get the clingy little bugger weaned - my second wouldn't give up the boob until 13 months despite my best efforts). The two year recommendation comes from the fact that in many places around the world it IS beneficial for a child to continue nursing until 2 for nutritional purposes and for birth control purposes (fallible though it is) for the mother.
The women that are still nursing older children in industrialized countries scare me. Everytime I see an instance of it, it is because the mother is completely wacked in the head and unable to give up their status as giver of life and nutrition. Case in point : one of the creepiest things I've ever watched. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHRyRCHuQ7g
tsukiyomi
Well-known member
Quote:
I'd also like to add that a lot of babies are easily confused between the nipple and the bottle so it's best to stick to one or the other.
What exactly do you find "creepy" about extended breastfeeding? It's been proven to be beneficial and I see nothing wrong with a child still getting nutrition and comfort from his or her mother's body. Even when the child is 2 or 3, they don't nurse all day. It might be one or two times or at night.
| Originally Posted by Ladybug10678
The only problem with saying that women could just pump or bottle feed expressed milk is that many babies won't take a bottle (my second was just like that, never once took a bottle even when I was in surgery for hours having my gall bladder removed) and some women can't pump or express. So for some women and some babies, there is no choice but straight from the source. It is also not as easy as just "leaving the kid with a sitter." It is also not always feasible to use a blanket to cover the baby. I don't find it surprising that a lot of the statements like this are coming from people without children. Because honestly, until you have children parenting is little more than a theory LOL I breastfeed my children, when they are babies, whereever and whenever they need to be fed. I try my best to plan my day so that I don't have to do it while out and about, but the best laid plans... That said, while I fully believe in exercising my legal rights to breastfeed in public, I do it discreetly and most of the time you wouldn't even notice. In fact, most nursing mothers are the same. It is a very small (and vocal) minority that does it indiscreetly and I firmly believe that most of that stems from an attention whore, selfish "my rights are the only valid rights" viewpoint. And extended breastfeeding creeps me the hell out. The WHO recommends nursing until 2. Personally, in a first world country, I find it unnecessary to breastfeed past 12 months. (Or whenever you can get the clingy little bugger weaned - my second wouldn't give up the boob until 13 months despite my best efforts). The two year recommendation comes from the fact that in many places around the world it IS beneficial for a child to continue nursing until 2 for nutritional purposes and for birth control purposes (fallible though it is) for the mother. The women that are still nursing older children in industrialized countries scare me. Everytime I see an instance of it, it is because the mother is completely wacked in the head and unable to give up their status as giver of life and nutrition. Case in point : one of the creepiest things I've ever watched. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHRyRCHuQ7g |
I'd also like to add that a lot of babies are easily confused between the nipple and the bottle so it's best to stick to one or the other.
What exactly do you find "creepy" about extended breastfeeding? It's been proven to be beneficial and I see nothing wrong with a child still getting nutrition and comfort from his or her mother's body. Even when the child is 2 or 3, they don't nurse all day. It might be one or two times or at night.
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