Control your brats.

[redambition]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gwaste Don't feed them candy, frappacinos, soda, chips, burgers, cookies, etc... just to make them shut up. It doesn't work and it just makes the kids even more obnoxious because they get used to having their every desire fed - also, it's AMAZING how different kids that are raised on a healthy diet and only given candy, etc... as a special treat. I guess it's sort of like a form of discipline without having to physically discipline your children.

oh hell yes. refined sugar is like speed for kids! (you can add that effect to the spoilt-bratness of always getting what they want).

jamie oliver showed how this worked in his school dinner series. he got a family that fed their kids processed foods, soft drinks and lollies most of the time. the kids were absolute terrors. he then changed the family's diet. after they switched to the diet of home cooked meals using lots of fresh ingredients and no lollies (except as a treat), the change was amazing. even the parents were stunned that their kids were so much calmer.

he's been campaigning for a while now to make the lunches provided in schools in the UK to be healthy and nutritious.

if you can get a hold of the series, i highly recommend watching it.

 

[lizardprincesa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by *KT* I certainly understand that. We have patients (young and old) who have physical and/or mental issues who are a joy to help. The practice I work for has pediatric specialists, retinal, corneal, etc... so we see pretty much everything. I used to babysit a boy who was born with downs syndrome when I was a teen, and beyond his obsession with Teenage Muntant Ninja Turtles, he was a fun kid and no more of a handful than any of the other boys I watched. The only reason I added that to my rant was because sometimes there are valid reasons for a child to freak out... especially in a medical setting where they've already had drops put in their eyes, etc and there's a degree of mistrust before they even make it over to pick out glasses. Years ago, I helped a child who was tactile defensive (extremely sensitive to touching of any kind) pick out glasses. It certainly was a challenge and took a bit of time to do it, but he handled the situation beautifully... which is so much more than I can say about little "Damien" in my rant. I'm convinced much of the credit in both the good and the bad case goes to the mothers and how they chose to handle new situations with their children. BTW, little "Damien" came in today again... this time with both mom and dad present. When the child started screaming again, dad was actually laughing like it was all very amusing that his son was a complete terror. I popped some Advil and closed my office door to help muffle the sounds. God be with the teacher who eventually has this kid in her classroom.

You are a doll, & the kids with whom you've worked are so fortunate to have you. I just finished writing you a conversational reply for 1 whole hour, & I moved something the wrong way (either the keyboard or my body (I have a herniated disc in my back which is causing me all sorts of problems) & I got, what my techy hubby calls, "The Blue Screen of Death." Crash! Gone

I so enjoyed your post. You are a truly good Soul.

I had so much more to say, but I always do!

You've been saved from a huge conversation-novel, by a technical meltdown. Maybe I'll pester you another time. I wrote you only positive, so, rather than a million words, please catch HeartVibes from over here!

Hope your Night Sparkles with Love & Stars,
CherylFaith

PS pics of my baby & our pregnant Cathy cat ( & more

you can see here, if anybody wants a laugh:

http://www.makeupalley.com/account/p...princesslover/
​

 

[chocodcocoa]

Some kids NEED to be slapped hard in the face.

I still remember the day when I heard this teenage (13 or 14ish) girl say to her mom: "I want this dress! I need this dress for my party! Get me the dress you f@cking s|ut!" and the woman just went "Okay honey!"

...wtf O.O

 

[daisyv316]

I concur!!!

 

[FullWroth]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gwaste also, it's AMAZING how different kids that are raised on a healthy diet and only given candy, etc... as a special treat. I guess it's sort of like a form of discipline without having to physically discipline your children.

I completely agree with the rest of your points, but with this one, you have to be really careful and tread a really fine line between "limited, balanced junk" and "strict diet." Kids with strict diets frequently have a much higher chance of gorging themselves on sweets and junk the minute they get out on their own, and making themselves sick and unhealthy in a matter of months (what do they call it, the freshman 15 or 40 or something? Because it happens in your freshman year of college?). Granted, I also know a girl who was raised on a healthy diet, and she usually ends up getting healthy snacks when she's got the munchies, but - at least in my personal experience - she's the exception rather than the rule.

But parenting is hard, man, you don't really have to be a parent to guess that it is, and I realize it needs to be custom-adjusted for every individual child, so kudos to you guys who are managing it and producing polite and intelligent future members of society. May they counteract the increasing tide of brats who can't even use a freaking ruler.

 

[DevinGirl]

Shim...I really wish you'd get over your inhibitions & say what's really on your mind. Stop sugar-coating things, Love

 

[ms.marymac]

Quote:

Originally Posted by newagetomatoz;1013244 [B Parents, stop letting your kids be little self-absorbed tyrants. We live here too.[/b]

This.

What's so sad is that are so many self-absorbed adults running around these days, I can't see many of them actually teaching their kids that they are not the center of the universe. Whenever I encounter someone like this, young or old, I just want to tell them that their mom lied to them.

 

[elegant-one]

Theres also a need for reward as well as discipline, however not in the same way parents give their kids everything they want. They must be taught by example, as children learn what they live. And, the fact that there are consequences for actions, both good & bad.

We had just a few i wouldn't call them rules but more principles. No premarital sex, no drugs/drinking, no one drives your car...those are the things when they're young that can really affect/ruin their whole life. Our son actually told us when he was 12 or 13 that he saw how some of his friends ruined their lives by their choices and that he did not want to live like that. Other things were negotiable with maturity & responsibility. We also lived a life of love, respect, & consideration towards each other as well as others.

We also supported his talents & likes as well as rewarding academic achievement - a must. And, we talked to him as a person, not an idiot or just a kid...real life communication.

Many parents say that they do not have the money to send their kids to college (we didn't) but our son soon learned that with hard work & good grades came the reward of scholarships. His first year of college he wrote a letter & was given $1500.00, late on receiving a full tuition waiver for academic achievements. Other kids could have received the same, but they were either too lazy or busy drinking or something to write the letter. There are plenty of resources if its searched out.

He became a College Professor at the age of 23. While still teaching, he then created his own business and travels the world (with the talent that was nurtured) which has become extremely successful & world renowned. He was interviewed for a magazine article on him, and he attributed his success to the "support & work ethics he learned from his parents". I think we cried for a week after reading that! Til this day (he is now 28) he always gives credit to us his parents for providing the foundation for his success. *tears come to eyes*

Although we are extremely proud, this isn't to brag, but rather present a balanced view in parenting. There is a ditch on either side of the road to reward & discipline.

BTW - we never, ever let him scream in public

 

[darkishstar]

Shoot. If I acted like the kids did these days when I was there age, I would get a beating to hell and back.

Hell, I still can get smacked upside the head if I say something stupid to my dad.

It was worse when I was younger, slapped on the back of the hand, the shoulder, the back, the back of the head. Well, that was my dad. But my mom would use the handles of fly swatters (metal ones O_O), clothes hangers, rolled up magazines, and her hand as well.

And I know that I would've deserved it. Because I was either being crazy and stupid and messing shit up. I don't want to have kids, but if I did, I would spank them too. Well, no I wouldn't.

If they piss me off:
"Drop and give me 50 push-ups!"
Them: "We won't do it agaaaaaain!"
Then they can't call child protection agencies because I didn't beat them. *cackles* Or I'd make them do some sort of tortuous martial arts thing that I did. Like 100 kicks. Or stances..

sitting in an invisible chair anyone?

Or:
If they're going to keep swinging their toy around and breaking stuff?
I'm going to take it away from them till they know that they will get it back if they behave.

See, you don't even have to lay a finger on kids for them to know that they're going to get it and get it good.
If they really got me mad though.. I'd probably smack them a little.

 

[entipy]

OMFG!!! I haven't read all these responses, but... you are my new hero!!!

You said it ALL, sister!

 

[elegant-one]

Here's some great parenting skills:

A young mom who is more occupied with her Mary Kay business than her 3 year old, was on the phone (conference call) while the kid wanders out the door in diapers and a t-shirt and is found standing in the middle of the road - happened twice

Another Mary Kay lady shows up at a meeting (at the same house) leaves 3 young boys in a running SUV in 90 degree heat for at least an hour & a half - oh well, they at least had a video player inside to babysit them *tongue in cheek*

 

[glassy girl]

OMG it's like if i wrote that. Till this day i have never met anyone close to my parenting skills.lol I'm told i'm to harsh from everybody but on the other hand i'm told i have such a Wonderful, Respectfull , kind ,friendly,( i could go on forever) kid (8 yrs old) and i'm like thank u if it wasn't 4 me actully loving my son enough and putting my foot down or down on his ass. I would not have such an amazing son loving ur kids is not just hugs and kisses(which he gets plenty of) it's also having rules and boundries,and the ocassional beat down lol !

 

[Beauty Mark]

I think what all people (parents, non-parents, future parents) should get out of these rants is that the most important thing is what you do. You can't always control your kid's behavior, but you can react to it in an effective way beyond laughing or indulging.

And I hate Heelies too. I wonder how many stupid lawsuits have occurred because of them

 

[gwaste]

Quote:

Originally Posted by FullWroth I completely agree with the rest of your points, but with this one, you have to be really careful and tread a really fine line between "limited, balanced junk" and "strict diet." Kids with strict diets frequently have a much higher chance of gorging themselves on sweets and junk the minute they get out on their own, and making themselves sick and unhealthy in a matter of months (what do they call it, the freshman 15 or 40 or something? Because it happens in your freshman year of college?). Granted, I also know a girl who was raised on a healthy diet, and she usually ends up getting healthy snacks when she's got the munchies, but - at least in my personal experience - she's the exception rather than the rule. But parenting is hard, man, you don't really have to be a parent to guess that it is, and I realize it needs to be custom-adjusted for every individual child, so kudos to you guys who are managing it and producing polite and intelligent future members of society. May they counteract the increasing tide of brats who can't even use a freaking ruler.

You know, I partially agree that kids who are limited on junk gorge themselves when they get their hands on it - because I did it... only one or two times though, because I got REALLY sick both times and developed an aversion to it.... I didn't exactly like puking or laying in bed all night when I could of been out doing something, y'know?

I know a lot of kids who were raised that way, myself included, and most of us to this day still don't eat a lot of refined sugar, processed foods, etc... as we're getting into our 20s. I think it's one of those anecdotal things where it depends on who you know - just saying, you never hear reports that tell you to give your kids these things on a regular basis just so they won't gorge themselves...

 

[angeluv009]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimmer P.S. If I ever find the motherfucker who created Heelies, I'm going to beat him within an inch of his life with one of those fucking shoes.

I agree, i hate those devil spawn children!!! And too-grown teen girls.

 

[tripwirechick]

I could not have said it better. There are so many stupid people out there reproducing it makes me sick. A lot of kids and teenagers have such a sense of entitlement these days and it's only the parents to blame. I personally don't want to have children, but I have mad respect for people who can teach their kids respect and manners and actually mould them into a thoughtful human being.

 

[SerenityRaine]

Especially now as my cousin has moved into my parents house I'm wondering where parenting has gone these days. 2 weeks ago was the end of my peace. Now everyday is a living hell. She has a 11 year old girl & a 6 year old boy.

EVERYDAY. Its can I have this? Can I have that? Gimme that. I want that. What the hell happened to the old saying that you can't have everything you see? My house isn't a fricking store. My mother taught me friend or family, that if I were at someone's house it wasn't polite to ask for anything other than a glass of water. The girl does it more than the boy. Its so rude to ask for everything you see. Makes you a begger, a mooch. No one likes either. Apparently, according to my grandparents she's always been like this. I find it rather hard to believe that this behavior has gone THIS long with out being corrected. My aunt, their grandmother always made sure she corrected any out of control kid. I just don't see how my cousin can be so OBLIVIOUS. One night she was making dinner & had already fed her kids. She had just begun eating her dinner herself and her daughter told her to give her the rest of the pasta.

I was trying to hint to my cousin by telling her daughter that I have never heard anyone use the phrase "can I have that" as much as her. And, her explaination? Monkey see, Monkey do. WTF! Thats not an explaination. My dogs know better than this kid that you can't have everything you see. They guard their food bowls if one tries to eat the others food they get snapped at.

The other day I was eating a sliced apple and the brat grabbed a piece and asked if she could have it. Grabbing before asking. Where the hell are her manners. I had to grab it back. All her mom did was said don't do it. Then the next day her son did the same thing. And, her response was that you can't have that.

The thing that pisses me off even more than the obnoxious of the kids asking for everything is that my cousin doesn't watch them. This house is really meant for kids. Her son broke a button on our home automation system. Does she know how much that thing costs and how much it is going to cost to fix it? I hate the fact that ppl think that you since you have money that its not a big deal if something gets broken. I showed my cousin the button & asked if she knew what happened to it. All she said was that her son probably did it. Thats it WTH? No sorry, or I'll pay to get it fixed. Nothing. So, far her kids have destroyed 5 things...

So, besides my cousin living with us, we have seminary students who live with us permanently in our basement and we had missionaries staying with us for 6 days. So, for the past two days its only been me holding down fort. My mom's been out of town for nearly 2 weeks and my dad 2 days. So, last night when her daughter found out that the missionaries were leaving she was talking about how she wanted to stay in that room. I told her no cuz my dad had stated that he only wanted them in one room. Today I went up to my room with my best friend to change b4 we went out. After, I had changed I noticed that the brat (girl) was in the room. I'm like I already told you that you can't stay in there. She proceded to give me lip all the while my friend and her mother were standing there. She goes "but, I just got my bag in here."I'm like you can't, cuz my mom wants you all in one room." As usual her mother really didn't do anything.. My friend said that she might've been perturbed/mad at me. But, WTH am I supposed to do? Let her mess up another room, I think not.

Sorry for the rant, but this is majorly pissing me off. Idk what to do. My cousin is 33 and I'm 24. I don't have kids. Parenting is a touchy subject & I don't really want to be the one to tell her. Its hard too cuz she's goin through a rough time with her husband. [Her pastor labeled him a socio-path & he's been hitting the bottle. Bad combo. But no excuse for lack of parenting.]

Any suggestions would be great! I was thinking of writing her a letter. In a nice manner cuz I don't want to hurt her but I just want to make her aware of her kids. I still can't see how she's oblivious to her kids. I don't have any but my dogs are the closest things. When they bark too much I cringe. It makes me feel self conscience & I feel bad that they don't shut up right away. [Its hard to get 4 dogs to quit barking. 2 are mine. Bark collars are in order.]

I feel bad my mom checks in with me daily. In a way I feel I tattled. My mom called her sister to have her try to talk to my cousin about her kids. My aunt called her but only got her voicemail. This shit has to stop somehow... just hoping sooner than later.

 

[duckduck]

I was in Sephora the other day and some 10 year old kid was rolling around on his fu@k!ng wheelies while mom made cursory attempts to keep the screaming baby down and tried out the latest NARS lipgloss. I was feeling rather passive, so I just gave her an ugly look. Surprisingly, she looked like she felt bad after that, and she and the kids were out of the store within a minute. I felt a little bad for embarrassing her out of the store, but hey, maybe she'll learn that a screaming baby and a kid on wheelies don't belong in my goddamn Sephora.

 

[Chic 2k6]

I was a child from hell when i was a kid. I'd throw temper tantrums, be dragged through streets and stores by my hand or lead. My poor mother was mortified but she still took me out to town once a week because she didn't want me to have my own way with stuff.

That being said, I was born deaf so I was two years behind normal hearing development so I couldn't be reasoned with, couldn't understand the timing, behavious etc... I feel guilty now putting my parents through that, especially my mom

I name hellion children 'Crotch Droppings' because that's what they are. I see heelies out and about (yes the damn things are invading the UK) and I just glare at them, I witnessed a stupid 11 year old crash into a display in the supermarker (the fruit & veg section) and I stared at the kid in disgust because that kid was going to raise merry hell about things being in his way.

I hate the lame excuse of parents being scared of their children not liking them (hello? Parents? not meant to be liked and be friends)