Forum Pet Peeves

[melliquor]

Great thread BTW... just spent an hour reading it all.

I don't have many pet peeves and a few of mine have been listed already...

- Using your children's pics as your avatars. I think that is just creepy and shouldn't be done... there are lots of weirdos out there.

- People with tons of thanked but no thanks. I think Shimmer said earlier that some people only come on here to post FOTDs but there are others that post in threads and always get thanked but never thanks anybody. I find it a bit rude.

- I think there should be a bit more constructive criticism in the FOTDs. I personally wouldn't mind in my FOTDs... somebody telling me if I am doing something wrong or how to improve. I am still learning and would like to know if I should be doing something different. As long it isn't bitchy or nasty, it is alright. I am guilty of this as well but I think that I am not an expert or need improvement and who am to say somebody should improve.

- Text typing... enough said

- Misspelling... drives me crazy

- I hate when people are nasty or argumentative on here. If you are pissed off, don't take it out on everybody. Go calm down and then come back online. If you know something pisses you off, ignore it. This isn't the place to vent your anger on everybody.

- Posting in the collections forum with smileys or you agree. It just looks like you are posting to post and trying to up the amount of posts you have. I can see doing it once but 4 times on one page... come on. It bulks up the forum is hard to read.

- In the collections forum, people ignoring your questions even though you have just read the whole thing and know it hasn't been asked yet but nobody can be bothered to answer it.

That's about it... seems like a lot but really... I love Specktra.

 

[Beauty Mark]

Maybe I'm being naive, but do people who have been thanked a lot but don't think people (thinking 0) realize that that's there? I think some of the newer members do not.

The "Thanks!" button is nice, but I also think that it doesn't mean a lot.

 

[Shimmer]

The thing about constructive criticism is that sometimes people get defensive and immediately go "Well I like my liner like that!!!" when a suggestion is made, and I've had members in the past ask me to simply delete the thread as a whole.

It's hard to know who's got skin thick enough and who doesn't.

 

[jasminbarley]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beauty Mark Maybe I'm being naive, but do people who have been thanked a lot but don't think people (thinking 0) realize that that's there? I think some of the newer members do not. The "Thanks!" button is nice, but I also think that it doesn't mean a lot.

If they've been thanked less than 50 times, perhaps that's possible. But over 8000 thanked but 0 thanks. Something's not quite right, IMHO.

And if you can see the "Quote" button and use it, then you should also be able to see the "Thank" button and use it. Of course, no one is forcing anyone to thank anyone - thanks should be given freely. But it's just a bit odd, IMHO, to interact and be thanked by so many and yet not come across a single person who is worthy of thanks.

 

[aziajs]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jasminbarley If they've been thanked less than 50 times, perhaps that's possible. But over 8000 thanked but 0 thanks. Something's not quite right, IMHO. And if you can see the "Quote" button and use it, then you should also be able to see the "Thank" button and use it. Of course, no one is forcing anyone to thank anyone - thanks should be given freely. But it's just a bit odd, IMHO, to interact and be thanked by so many and yet not come across a single person who is worthy of thanks.

I wish there was a super thanks button! LOL! I would give you a super thanks.

How could you not see it? I also think that it's used as a courtesy to other posters to show that you appreciate their input.

 

[aziajs]

Ok, I have another peeve.

It annoys the hell out of me when people are just plain rude and then blame it on misinterpretation of tone due to the internet. No, your tone is not being misinterpreted. When you say smart ass things over the entire board it's not that people are just reading too much into what you have said. When there is a pattern in how you articulate yourself the reader is not the one with the problem. If you say, for example, "you don't know what you're talking about. Why would you say that? That's silly." How the hell else would someone interpret that other than you being an ass?? If you said that to someone in person, how do you think they would react?

 

[jasminbarley]

Quote:

Originally Posted by aziajs I also think that it's used as a courtesy to other posters to show that you appreciate their input.

That is a really neat way of putting it, aziajs

 

[JustDivine]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jasminbarley If they've been thanked less than 50 times, perhaps that's possible. But over 8000 thanked but 0 thanks. Something's not quite right, IMHO. And if you can see the "Quote" button and use it, then you should also be able to see the "Thank" button and use it. Of course, no one is forcing anyone to thank anyone - thanks should be given freely. But it's just a bit odd, IMHO, to interact and be thanked by so many and yet not come across a single person who is worthy of thanks.

This is what I'm saying....hence why I asked if there are people who have some special status by technical adjustment that prohibits them from thanking others. Because it eludes my understanding and its the only way for me to explain over 8,000 thanked an no thanks. I honestly thought I was seeing things.

 

[Beauty Mark]

Some people just don't put that much thought into the site or seem to strictly participate as tutorial makers and possibly nothing else (there are a handful of people I haven't seen participate outside of FOTD and the tutorial forums and it seems to only be posting them). Some people probably are genuinely blind to things on the site or don't care enough to investigate; I don't know what the multi button did until a few minutes ago. There's stuff on the right side of the profile (under the avatar) I have no idea what it does. On another board where I've been a member for years, I'm not sure what some of the features on my profile do still do that site. I'm personally more invested in reading posts or posting myself. On this site, I generally do try to use the "Thanks" buton when a post has been helpful *shrugs

I feel like regardless of how often you've been thanked, people do appreciate your input. Way up thread on this (the first page, actually), I think MissChievous put it best:
Quote:

I never knew some of you ladies take the "Thanks" button so seriously! Honestly, Janice installed that application as a fun little thing to give back to users, and so we can easily say "thanks" to someone without having to hit reply. It really doesn't matter how many thanks/thanked someone has, this isn't a popularity contest. I know I have a lot of thanked posts, but honestly, I barely ever look at that on people's avatars. It doesn't make anyone's opinion more or less valid, I go by what people write or post. There are no rules regarding the correct etiquette to "thanking", so don't worry about it.

 

[jasminbarley]

I can't speak for anyone else here but the examples that I'm thinking of are of users who post outside of the FOTD and tutorial sections.

Regarding being thanked - it's human nature to expect fairness and a bit of give and take. If there's a huge discrepancy between thanks and thanked, it can create a feeling of imbalance and unfairness. Regardless of the original remit for the "thanks" function, it may have evolved into something else that's unwritten but generally accepted. If it's just about saying, "thank you" without having to hit reply, then it would seem that the green dots are extraneous and keeping a count of how many thanks and thanked you receive and give are extraneous. Indeed, if it's not a popularity contest, that is, your reputation on the board doesn't matter, then all of these numbers shouldn't be visible to anyone else - because your numbers don't matter and people should take each of your posts at face-value.

Since there aren't any official forum rules regarding the correct etiquette to "thanking", my guess is that people make up their own. For example, new users may look at a post that receives numerous thanks and try to emulate the features of that post to build up their thanked numbers. Whilst there's no monetary value in being thanked thousands of times and it doesn't really matter IRL or even online, I would guess that people still want to feel that they've helped in some way - otherwise, why give advice or post an opinion at all? Some people may not be posting solely to get thanked, but being acknowledged and feeling like they're part of a community may still be important to them.

I have a feeling that we may be approaching this from the wrong direction. For what it's worth, IMHO, the issue isn't that people feel that they're not being thanked enough individually; it's that people want to see fairness and other people giving thanks regardless of the target. Whatever the commonly accepted ratio may be, my guess is that that those who have mentioned the issue as a pet peeve would agree that thousands of thanked and no thanks is disproportionate.

I'm sorry if any of this seems argumentative; it's not my intention to put anyone's back up. I'm just trying to explain my point of view because I was one of the people who mentioned "disproportionate thanks and thanked" as a pet peeve.

 

[rbella]

Quote:

Originally Posted by aziajs Ok, I have another peeve. It annoys the hell out of me when people are just plain rude and then blame it on misinterpretation of tone due to the internet. No, your tone is not being misinterpreted. When you say smart ass things over the entire board it's not that people are just reading too much into what you have said. When there is a pattern in how you articulate yourself the reader is not the one with the problem. If you say, for example, "you don't know what you're talking about. Why would you say that? That's silly." How the hell else would someone interpret that other than you being an ass?? If you said that to someone in person, how do you think they would react?

I'm sorry aziajs, but you don't know what you are talking about.

Just kidding!!!!!!!!

I totally agree with your statement. It is possible to disagree in written word without offending people. I hate the "its your problem if you took what I said wrong" attitude. Ummm, no I didn't. You are just a jerk.....

 

[FullWroth]

Aside from everything already mentioned, I hate hate HATE it when people don't read the forum rules, then get all irritated when a mod corrects them on something they did wrong. On my forum, I've even once had a girl who, when corrected several times for the same mistake (a really glaringly stupid one, like if someone here were to post about the latest MAC collection in Deep Thoughts or The Den or something, then posted another thread with swatches there, then posted another thread with their thoughts on the collection there...), had the nerve to tell me she "didn't think the rules actually mattered."

What did you think we WROTE them for then?! Dumb dumb dumbity dumbdumb.

 

[..kels*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimmer I think that, with the amount of snark out on the internet, anyone who posts an FOTD deserves a little pick me up, whether it's in the form of 'thanks', rep, or a comment.

i agree.

& although it would be nice to get some positive CC on specktra, i think it appeals to members that they can comfortably post a FOTD & not have to worry about being picked apart. IMO, encouragment leads to confidence & will put an aspiring makeup artist farther ahead than any CC would. too much CC can be discouraging.

 

[Willa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimmer The thing about constructive criticism is that sometimes people get defensive and immediately go "Well I like my liner like that!!!" when a suggestion is made, and I've had members in the past ask me to simply delete the thread as a whole. It's hard to know who's got skin thick enough and who doesn't.

But you know, it's one of the reasons I never really posted a FOTD. Ok, to be honest I don't have a camera but when I have my mother's, I don't post it anyway because I think people arent constructive enough.

It's ok the way it is, recieving compliments is always good, but I know that I'm not at my best yet (a little lack of technique here and there), and I would love to see advices and comments on it, to improve. I don't really need to be told that it's beautiful and pretty, when I know it's not the way it should look/be.

I don't know if you get my point? I'm losing my english hahaha

So that's why I would love to get constructive criticism. But I know not everybody would. I guess that if we do, more and more, people will get use to it?

 

[Janice]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willa But you know, it's one of the reasons I never really posted a FOTD. Ok, to be honest I don't have a camera but when I have my mother's, I don't post it anyway because I think people arent constructive enough. It's ok the way it is, recieving compliments is always good, but I know that I'm not at my best yet (a little lack of technique here and there), and I would love to see advices and comments on it, to improve. I don't really need to be told that it's beautiful and pretty, when I know it's not the way it should look/be.

The members who truly want CC ask for it in their FOTD post and generally receive it.

Thanks - some people just don't participate in the forum to it's full capability. The thanks feature is an option that is there for people to use but only if they take the time to. Others don't make posts, but they use the thanks! button as their way of interacting with anothers contribution. The thanks button doesn't have any official guidelines for use, because it's so subjective. Besides, how would we police non sanctioned use?

The reputation and thanks numbers etc are displayed to recognize and reward those who make in investment in a forum by participating and sharing content, information, and a piece of themselves. If there were no incentive to make that investment, how active would anyone be and what would make you want to return?

Just my $.02

 

[Shadowy Lady]

haha, I enjoyed reading this thread, can't believe I had missed it until now.

My biggest pet peeve is definitely when people call you rude or stupid when you disagree with their opinions. Guaranted, i've seen this a lot less on Specktra than other forums. I also do find that a lot of the questions are repeated in the recommendation section. It doesn't bug me as much but I feel bad for the mods who have to keep posting links to existing threads with similar topics for those people.

I think that's it for me. Great forum and the best way to spend my lunch hour at work

 

[jasminbarley]

Thanks for your response, Janice

I appreciate that not everyone participates in any forum to its full capacity. Regarding this forum in particular, perhaps those with 'disproportionate' thanks and thanked have decided that if they get thanked then that's the choice of those people who thank them, but they're not going to give any thanks out themselves. Or perhaps it's totally innocent and they really don't notice that each of their posts generate 50+ thanks nor do they notice that they've been thanked thousands of times but have never given thanks to a single person.

Whatever their reasons or lack thereof, judging by this thread, the result is still the same - it may still seem unfair to other people who see the disproportionate numbers. But I guess that you can't please everyone! I appreciate that there's not a lot than can be done about disproportionate numbers because giving thanks is voluntary and, as you wrote, subjective; using the thanks function isn't enforceable and attempting to do so would probably undermine the 'goodwill' underlying the system, IMHO.

I'm certainly not asking for the thanks function to be policed or for something to be included in the site rules - I'm participating in this thread to discuss our pet peeves, not to bring about a revolution. If change happens as a result of anything in this thread and it improves the user experience, then brilliant! Equally, if nothing happens, I'm equally okay with that.

Regarding your comments about incentives - I appreciate that as the site owner, you need to make the site as sticky as possible so that people return. However, does an individual's incentives earned need to be visible to everyone else to achieve that? That was the point I was trying to put forward in my previous post. Incentives earned visible to everyone, effectively does turn it into a popularity contest, IMHO. That is, a more highly 'decorated' user --> a more useful and valuable member of the community --> more popular. A popularity contest isn't necessarily a bad thing though. It's just the nature of the beast, IMHO.

To reiterate, I'm not asking for any changes; just responding to points that were brought up earlier, enjoying the discussion and hopefully learning something new!

 

[Shimmer]

If it weren't the 'thanks' button, it would be the user rep button. If it weren't that, it would be user titles, post count, etc.

Fact is that people who contribute something that others want to read / see (in the case of swatches...many of the people who have disproportionate 'thanks' are people who post some very helpful swatches on the site but don't post elsewhere) are going to get some kind of positive feedback.
I would hope that we're not suggesting a system where no score is kept, no grades are registered, no positive incentive to contributors made, etc. is preferable.

 

[Trunkmonkey]

*peeks out of trunk and reaches for pipe wrench.... ohpleaseohpleaseohplease

 

[MAC_Whore]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jasminbarley ......Incentives earned visible to everyone, effectively does turn it into a popularity contest, IMHO........

I just don't see Specktra as the kind of board where that matters, honestly. I just see it (the thanks) as a nice option for those who want to use it.

Not directed at you jasminbarley, just my general thoughts on the topic:

As Shimmer mentioned, the volume and type of posting that a user does makes a difference as to how many times they may be thanked. Users shouldn't feel obligated to maintain a "resonable range" between their thanks and thanked numbers. They shouldn't even think about it.

I really see "Thanks" as a non-issue. They are there. If you are so moved, thank someone. That's a nice gesture on your part. If you do not feel a thanks is due, don't thank and don't worry about it.