Long Distance Relationship Support Thread

[User93]

Quote:

Originally Posted by xNatalieNoelle I've never met someone like him before...(just my luck that I finally meet someone like that and he lives 8 hours away!!! )

I know, right?

I wish you all the best girl

Trust me the 1st time you guys meet each other would be unforgettable! I can imagine how tough waiting is, but if you feel this is the right person, and you both are willing to work things out I'm sure you can make it

Amd are you sure there is no way to see each other as soon as possible? I mean.. 8 hours away isn't that far away. If it's 8 hours away driving you can just buy the cheapest bus ticket and go!

 

[krijsten]

So, I'm another in a long distance relationship.. which started on the internet!

At first we were just really good friends.. we started talking in october, and he called me for the first time Halloween! After that we started talking a lot on the phone, and camming a lot. I just got out of a long serious 3 year relationship and even though i was starting to really like this guy I wasnt to interested.

I was moving to Vancouver, and even though he has never been there he has always wanted to go. blahblahblah. In March I flew there and spent 2 weeks with him. It was just akdljsadkljs love it. Happy happy

In 17 days he should be here to spend the rest of the summer with me.

I miss him a lot, LDR are super hard. And i find it getting more challenginging as we go onnnn.

 

[AlliSwan]

So I landed the only straight guy--and god is he gorgeous, tremendously kind, and funny!--in fashion design school. We have only been dating for a little over 4 months but we are so happy and in love it's unreal... As awesome as it is that I am done with design school and my BFA and moving to NYC (!!), it's pretty not awesome that he is still in Florida and won't be done for at least another year and a half

It's nice to read through the happy endings in here. I am not looking forward to the next 18 months of sporadic visits and hardcore missing-each-other pangs (tears are falling just writing this). But we both said if we can make it through this we can make it through anything.

 

[AlliSwan]

Bumping this because the distance thing has not been *that* difficult so far, except I am in NYC and have lots to do and keep me busy and the boy wants to talk on the phone 2-4 times a day whether he has anything to say or not! I adore that he wants to talk every day, but when we talk at midnight and then he calls me at 9 am the next day, no honey, NOTHING IS NEW. And then again at 4 PM. STILL NO NEWS. I end up getting annoyed and picking a mini fight, like today I kept asking him a question and he was just sitting there silently. ACKNOWLEDGE, PLEASE! The fact that I've been asking him for 3+ weeks to send a few things to me and the lazy bastard still hasn't done it isn't helping. /rant

 

[Blushbaby]

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlliSwan Bumping this because the distance thing has not been *that* difficult so far, except I am in NYC and have lots to do and keep me busy and the boy wants to talk on the phone 2-4 times a day whether he has anything to say or not! I adore that he wants to talk every day, but when we talk at midnight and then he calls me at 9 am the next day, no honey, NOTHING IS NEW. And then again at 4 PM. STILL NO NEWS. I end up getting annoyed and picking a mini fight, like today I kept asking him a question and he was just sitting there silently. ACKNOWLEDGE, PLEASE! The fact that I've been asking him for 3+ weeks to send a few things to me and the lazy bastard still hasn't done it isn't helping. /rant

That made me laugh cos I can relate. My boyf and I must talk on average about 7 times a day/night and sometimes I just have nothing to say cos nothing has happened within the 2 hours since I last spoke to him!

He'll be like "You don't wanna talk? Why you ain't sayin' nothin'?!". I just tell him straight " Babe, I've got nothin' to say - no new developments in my life, nada!".

As for sending stuff in the post - again he's the same. It took him 2 mths to send me the make up that arrived in the post after I flew home in May. I won't get mad though cos he's a sweetie and I accept that my make up just isn't that high on his list of priorities after a hard day at work

I'm flying out for a long (dirty

) wkend in Sept though as he can't wait until I fly out in late October as that'll be 5 mths that we'd have seen each other last. I'm all excited now cos I do miss him loads but just force myself to "get on with it" and keep myself occupied so I'm not at home wailing that my man's 3000+ miles away!

One thing though, when I go and see him in Sept, his brother will be in town celebrating his b'day with both a house party and then a "boys night out". I'll only be in NY for 3 days but whatever, I don't mind him going out with the guys - that's his brother. However, when I said I'd probably take the opportunity to meet up with an old school friend who also lives in NY and hit a club with her and her friends he started acting up!

I dunno what it is about American men and their disdain at a woman who's in a r'ship going out to a club - get over it!!

I'm going out with the GIRLS to have a good time with the GIRLS! I'm not gonna be checking other men out that night but I sure as hell won't be going to a club in a damn polo-neck either. I'll be dressed up and ready to roll, the same way I do here in London.That's the whole point of getting glammed up for a night out - you get dressed up!

I sense there'll be a few more "discussions" surrounding this but I don't see why I should sit at home bored waiting for him to come home. I wanna make the most of my long wkend in NY too.

 

[RedRibbon]

Blushbaby, you are too cute

I LIVE with Mr RR and it's nigh on impossible to shut me up, I'm always going on about something.

You ladies are bloody great though, I must say. Even when Mr RR goes away for a week/a few days and I go to the airport with him I'm like this >

. The same is true when I go to pick him up/he comes through the door so it's easier if he comes and goes when I'm not there but I can't have that in case he never comes back (GOD FORBID!)

I know I wouldn't be strong enough to have an LDR.

 

[Blushbaby]

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedRibbon Even when Mr RR goes away for a week/a few days and I go to the airport with him I'm like this > .

I hate airport goodbyes. Being surrounded by so many sad people all saying goodbye to their loved ones sets me off no matter how hard I try to compose myself.
Last time I told my boyf to leave and not wait until I went through the gate like he usually does. Seeing him just standing there looking sad and blowing kisses makes me bawl! I didn't turn back to look if he was still there after we kissed goodbye, it was just too hard.

LDR's aren't for everybody. They can break even the strongest of personalities.

 

[NutMeg]

Yeah, towards the end there I had to stop going to the airport with my boyfriend because it was just too upsetting. Even saying goodbye to him at my place before he got into the cab was gut wrenching, but at least I could go curl up in my bed and cry afterwards instead of having to hold it together for the airport goers.

It was strange though, after that good cry I wouldn't miss him at all for a couple of weeks. Then it would slowly build up again.

 

[RedRibbon]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blushbaby I hate airport goodbyes. Being surrounded by so many sad people all saying goodbye to their loved ones sets me off no matter how hard I try to compose myself. Last time I told my boyf to leave and not wait until I went through the gate like he usually does. Seeing him just standing there looking sad and blowing kisses makes me bawl! I didn't turn back to look if he was still there after we kissed goodbye, it was just too hard. LDR's aren't for everybody. They can break even the strongest of personalities.

I know I wouldn't be able to do it, I think I'd just be trying to please the other person all the time and not be myself in case a fight spoilt the time we had together.

Quote:

Originally Posted by NutMeg Yeah, towards the end there I had to stop going to the airport with my boyfriend because it was just too upsetting. Even saying goodbye to him at my place before he got into the cab was gut wrenching, but at least I could go curl up in my bed and cry afterwards instead of having to hold it together for the airport goers. It was strange though, after that good cry I wouldn't miss him at all for a couple of weeks. Then it would slowly build up again.

I don't care about other people at the airport

, even when my mum goes on holiday for two weeks I will cry when saying goodbye to her even though I have never been mollycoddled by her or anything.

When Mr RR goes away, I'm sad for that day and then by the time I start enjoying myself, he's back but I wouldn't change our arrangement for anything. As much as he loves hearing it and I hate saying it, he keeps me sane.

 

[User93]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blushbaby I hate airport goodbyes. Being surrounded by so many sad people all saying goodbye to their loved ones sets me off no matter how hard I try to compose myself. Last time I told my boyf to leave and not wait until I went through the gate like he usually does. Seeing him just standing there looking sad and blowing kisses makes me bawl! I didn't turn back to look if he was still there after we kissed goodbye, it was just too hard. LDR's aren't for everybody. They can break even the strongest of personalities.

SO TRUE! It was heart breaking sitting together on the banch waiting for my flight to open a passenger registration.. and then just standing in the line for the gate and seeing my bf just standing there looking at me. I was trying to catch every second just to look at him, then there were more people arriving so I couldn't see him and still tried to.. That was so hard.

I don't care for people around in the airport.. but it's just so hard

 

[AlliSwan]

I am going home at the end of the month to give my final presentation before graduation and I'll get to see my man!! We've had a couple BAD fights but we do love each other so we're trying to make it work. Skype <3

 

[Paramnesia]

Hey everybody I'm Chloe,
It's nice to find some people who've been through the who have been through LDR's. I've just started dating a guy online (after being single nearly 6yrs) and trying to come to grips with it all... I'm completely struggling to make sense of and deal with it. He lives in England and I'm in Australia.

We've been friends online for a few months now, he's my best friend and we both feel like we've known each other much longer. I suffer from depression and generalised anxiety disorder and he's really helped me deal with both and moving. We've only just started dating, I mean less than 2 weeks but it feels much longer.

To be honest I'm already really struggling to grasp it all, so any advice would be really great. He's a wonderful guy, so amazingly kind to me and we both get each other, neither of us have felt understood by somebody else before. We talk on skype and msn (though both play up on us every single night, which is sending me mental... not too mention so does both our internet).

Also did any of you guys feel a like scared that the guys you've meet might not be what they seem? I mean he hasn't given me any reason to doubt him, it's just when it comes to people online you just never know 100%. He's coming to visit me in Dec which is exciting but a tad scary.

And also does anybody else notice skype uses up SOOOOOOOOO much MB's, I'm gunna have to stop using skype every night or I'm gunna be broke and not be able to afford to go to England.

But yes, seriously any info, advice, support would be greatly appreciated this is so new to me, I feel like a deer in headlights (a depressed deer).

Thanks guys

 

[Kayteuk]

Sorry for not posting more often girls, I kinda withdrew from Specktra while saving a lot of money as...I am getting married

. Yay!

The US visa alone with Lawyers has cost over $5,000 so far without flights, adjustment of status once I have arrived, driving tests yada yada... So its been a tough few months, and all my MAC is with my Fiancee in Florida.

So I wont be a LDR girl for much longer hopefully, I hope to be over there by December and having my wedding a few days after I arrive (Something small but sweet) and then having a bigger wedding with all my family in 5 years time when we are less broke.

For anyone that's in a relationship with someone in the USA and is thinking about visa's, I am more than happy to answer any questions as its one of the most confusing (And expensive) processes out there. It takes a lot of time for it to be completed, and even with Lawyers it isn't a easy ride.

As for the wedding dress, still having a bit of a mental breakdown about how much they cost, I keep telling my Fiancee I am going to arrive in a tuxedo because it would be so much easier as I cant find my perfect dress! We are getting married at a beach chapel in a nice floaty white dress (If I can find one I like) and then having the evening reception on a cruise ship.

. Even though its a small ceremony I have still lost weight and toned up for it, and trying to grow out my hair...Ack! Long process..

Hope everyone is well and I wish you all the best, I will be hanging around a bit more now

.

 

[User93]

Wow Kayte! Congrats girl!!!!!! Thats some awesome news right there, my God! I'm so so happy to read this

It's completely worth of it, you guys can have another "fancy" marriage later.. man, you can have a 5 of them if you want. It's amazing and romantic, the beach chapel sounds super cool. How do you feel about moving there?

 

[Blushbaby]

Congrats hon ...wow you're finally doing it. I'm off to NY in 10 days to see my boyf. Can't wait!

 

[preciouscharm]

Omgish I forgot about my little home here on specktra. Sorry I've been MIA.

And CONGRATS kayteuk!!!

I went to see my bf for only one week during the summer and am planning to go visit him in CA for the whole winter break. Being in my third year of college already, and preping for the MCAT and Med School, school + a new job + studying is stressful as it is. I wish I had my best friend with me

.
We just had our 5 year anniversary on Sept 5

 

[sweetbabyblue]

Sorry, I've been away heaps too!
I last saw my bf in July, I don't know when I will see him again with uni, uni placements for me and uni vacation work for him. The earliest will be in December if he doesn't have to do vacation work yet, if not then, it may not be until next year.