Talk to me.
- Thread starter Janice
- Start date
i think that alot of people do try answering questions and putting people in the right direction. only 2 days ago i rpelied when nobody else did for a cp request that had been placed in the wrong forum. like Susanne said because people can't read every single post (i have a social life on occasion!
)some slip through. but i know i always try my best to help newbies and always be polite.
i can totally understand why some people getting annoyed at being asked the same question over and over. which is why if i ever see said question i'll look for the answer to help out
i honestly had no idea that people have been pm'ing each other and such about all these issues so i'm really shocked that things escalated so much. that said i love specktra and will continue to post and try and do what i can to get newbies and lurkers posting!
i can totally understand why some people getting annoyed at being asked the same question over and over. which is why if i ever see said question i'll look for the answer to help out
i honestly had no idea that people have been pm'ing each other and such about all these issues so i'm really shocked that things escalated so much. that said i love specktra and will continue to post and try and do what i can to get newbies and lurkers posting!
banana1234
Well-known member
you should have posted hakuna matata.. would have lightened the mood a little
ForgetRegret
Well-known member
Try and be mad while looking at this.
Attachment 10028
...I know this is a serious discussion, but I have to agree with the notion of lightening the mood a bit...it doesn't seem quite as angry as it has, but still...I thought this picture might at least make everyone smile.
Attachment 10028
...I know this is a serious discussion, but I have to agree with the notion of lightening the mood a bit...it doesn't seem quite as angry as it has, but still...I thought this picture might at least make everyone smile.
elegant-one
Well-known member
^ He/She is sooooo adorable!
rbella
Well-known member
Holy God, I love that dog.
Cassadalinnis, I can appreciate where you are coming from. I think you are being very sweet. Keep in mind, though, that if you look at the views vs. posts in just about any of threads, the views will heavily outweigh the numbers of posts. For instance, a FOTD might get 300 views, yet only 15 posts. Or, in the chatter, a topic will have 5000 views and 100 posts.
That particular post could have been viewed by people who had no clue what the answer to her question was, outside "lurkers" who don't have accounts as well as by the original poster herself. Not that your intentions are good and meaningful, I just think it is important to note that the fact that it went unanswered does not necessarily show lack of care from members. Does that make any sense? Sometimes when I try to say something I don't paint the proper picture.
Either way, I think it is very sweet of you to make such a huge effort to be nice to everyone.
Cassadalinnis, I can appreciate where you are coming from. I think you are being very sweet. Keep in mind, though, that if you look at the views vs. posts in just about any of threads, the views will heavily outweigh the numbers of posts. For instance, a FOTD might get 300 views, yet only 15 posts. Or, in the chatter, a topic will have 5000 views and 100 posts.
That particular post could have been viewed by people who had no clue what the answer to her question was, outside "lurkers" who don't have accounts as well as by the original poster herself. Not that your intentions are good and meaningful, I just think it is important to note that the fact that it went unanswered does not necessarily show lack of care from members. Does that make any sense? Sometimes when I try to say something I don't paint the proper picture.
Either way, I think it is very sweet of you to make such a huge effort to be nice to everyone.
clslvr6spd
Well-known member
Ill throw this in there to make people smile!
darkishstar
Well-known member
I think I can safely say I was one of the members here who kinda faded away to the background. I was very active and posted up swatches, lip swatches, and all sorts of things. And then my life got busy, school was too much, I went through a bad sort of break up (yet again!) and after sorting out my life I came back.
And yes, I still see old faces, but there are HARDLY any new ones. Yes we are very welcome to new members, but I know I can't be the only one that noticed that new members do not tend to stay and chat in the threads, it is the same girls that post over and over, and that's fine. But maybe we need to look at why new members stop posting or why new members don't tend to stay around, I especially notice this in the Color Collection threads.
I am going to say that yes, I have been part of thread drama before. And it has not made me happy, I remember standing up for someone else because for some reason whatsoever (that they do not deserve I might add), they have become attacked and at the rally of one person although in the beginning of the whole thing, they were fine with the discussion. I think people do take the forum too seriously and forget that yes, text can be easily misread or misinterpreted, and unfortunately, this is what happened in that instance I can remember and instead of finding fault with themselves for not understanding the OP's train of thought, they took offense instead for something clearly not the OP's fault.
It's things like that that make me hesitant to post anymore. I can safely say that individually everyone is great. But once someone gets an idea, especially a more popular person or active member, everyone will instantly jump on her side. And I hate to see that sort of thing going on, but it definitely happens.
And while I love this place, with my obsession drawing to an end, I also find less need to come around. So this is probably the biggest reason why people stop coming around, and probably the reason of most senior members, because I mean, they have SO much stuff and Specktra only makes the buying issue worse, and I think that's definitely why people stop coming on because if they can avoid Specktra, they might be able to avoid the enabling.
I think we all need to step back and just remember why we're here in the first place. It's because we all love make-up, put all those issues with other people aside and put all that negativity aside and gush about the things you love, help out all the new people because they love it too, there's already that common ground, there is no need to feel higher than anyone just because you've been around longer. I think if we can all remember that we're here because we love make-up and that we have fun talking about upcoming collection and new fancy colors and stuff, with EVERYONE, we can bring back the positive mood again.
And yes, I still see old faces, but there are HARDLY any new ones. Yes we are very welcome to new members, but I know I can't be the only one that noticed that new members do not tend to stay and chat in the threads, it is the same girls that post over and over, and that's fine. But maybe we need to look at why new members stop posting or why new members don't tend to stay around, I especially notice this in the Color Collection threads.
I am going to say that yes, I have been part of thread drama before. And it has not made me happy, I remember standing up for someone else because for some reason whatsoever (that they do not deserve I might add), they have become attacked and at the rally of one person although in the beginning of the whole thing, they were fine with the discussion. I think people do take the forum too seriously and forget that yes, text can be easily misread or misinterpreted, and unfortunately, this is what happened in that instance I can remember and instead of finding fault with themselves for not understanding the OP's train of thought, they took offense instead for something clearly not the OP's fault.
It's things like that that make me hesitant to post anymore. I can safely say that individually everyone is great. But once someone gets an idea, especially a more popular person or active member, everyone will instantly jump on her side. And I hate to see that sort of thing going on, but it definitely happens.
And while I love this place, with my obsession drawing to an end, I also find less need to come around. So this is probably the biggest reason why people stop coming around, and probably the reason of most senior members, because I mean, they have SO much stuff and Specktra only makes the buying issue worse, and I think that's definitely why people stop coming on because if they can avoid Specktra, they might be able to avoid the enabling.
I think we all need to step back and just remember why we're here in the first place. It's because we all love make-up, put all those issues with other people aside and put all that negativity aside and gush about the things you love, help out all the new people because they love it too, there's already that common ground, there is no need to feel higher than anyone just because you've been around longer. I think if we can all remember that we're here because we love make-up and that we have fun talking about upcoming collection and new fancy colors and stuff, with EVERYONE, we can bring back the positive mood again.
Susanne
Well-known member
Quote:
I agree: We are over 40,000 members here and maybe those 100 who had read this post before could not help at this moment or on that topic.
I am sure that sooner or later always someone can help and will post it!
Originally Posted by rbella
Cassadalinnis, I can appreciate where you are coming from. I think you are being very sweet. Keep in mind, though, that if you look at the views vs. posts in just about any of threads, the views will heavily outweigh the numbers of posts. For instance, a FOTD might get 300 views, yet only 15 posts. Or, in the chatter, a topic will have 5000 views and 100 posts. That particular post could have been viewed by people who had no clue what the answer to her question was, outside "lurkers" who don't have accounts as well as by the original poster herself. Not that your intentions are good and meaningful, I just think it is important to note that the fact that it went unanswered does not necessarily show lack of care from members. Does that make any sense? Sometimes when I try to say something I don't paint the proper picture. Either way, I think it is very sweet of you to make such a huge effort to be nice to everyone. |
I agree: We are over 40,000 members here and maybe those 100 who had read this post before could not help at this moment or on that topic.
I am sure that sooner or later always someone can help and will post it!
abbyquack
Well-known member
Janice,
I know I'm a little late, but to answer your initial question, in my experience here, I have always felt, and continue to feel, that there is a great tone here at Specktra, and that there are people willing to welcome me and help me out with any questions, whether they be about makeup, or personal things or whatever. This is not the case on a lot of makeup forums or LJ pages where people are truly mean to each other, and so I've always felt comfortable turning to Specktra.
I'm sad that not everyone feels this way, but I also understand the fact that every one's experience on Specktra is going to be different based on the forums they visit, or the way they interpret the things users write.
Occasionally, I will run across a conversation that is snarky or one person acts superior to others or whatever it is, but I realize that these people exist in every facet of life, and I can't get all worked up about their remarks, I've just ignored it- to me, it doesn't reflect on the overall tone of the forums.
I wish I could make a list of all the members who have been so so sweet, and considerate, but it would take me forever, because there are so many. But I do want to say "thanks!" to all my specktrettes who make these forums worthwhile with their knowledge and friendship that they offer to us all.
I know I'm a little late, but to answer your initial question, in my experience here, I have always felt, and continue to feel, that there is a great tone here at Specktra, and that there are people willing to welcome me and help me out with any questions, whether they be about makeup, or personal things or whatever. This is not the case on a lot of makeup forums or LJ pages where people are truly mean to each other, and so I've always felt comfortable turning to Specktra.
I'm sad that not everyone feels this way, but I also understand the fact that every one's experience on Specktra is going to be different based on the forums they visit, or the way they interpret the things users write.
Occasionally, I will run across a conversation that is snarky or one person acts superior to others or whatever it is, but I realize that these people exist in every facet of life, and I can't get all worked up about their remarks, I've just ignored it- to me, it doesn't reflect on the overall tone of the forums.
I wish I could make a list of all the members who have been so so sweet, and considerate, but it would take me forever, because there are so many. But I do want to say "thanks!" to all my specktrettes who make these forums worthwhile with their knowledge and friendship that they offer to us all.
ForgetRegret
Well-known member
Quote:
I agree as well. I know personally I read every thread in the recommendations forum, but I don't answer the ones I don't feel I can help with...and sometimes I'll read because I have a similar issue or question, and want to see what other members have to say in response. I do, however, see where you were coming from, and it's a point well-raised.
PS. Can I just say how I'm feeling like the tone of this thread is changing...it's gone from something heated and quite uncomfortable to something that feels like it can be productive. If we continue down this road of making suggestions, and talking things out like this, I think we can definitely improve the overall health of Specktra, and maybe be more welcoming to new members who may be hesitant to post. Thumbs up to all you ladies...THIS is why I keep coming back over and over again.
| Originally Posted by rbella
Holy God, I love that dog. Cassadalinnis, I can appreciate where you are coming from. I think you are being very sweet. Keep in mind, though, that if you look at the views vs. posts in just about any of threads, the views will heavily outweigh the numbers of posts. For instance, a FOTD might get 300 views, yet only 15 posts. Or, in the chatter, a topic will have 5000 views and 100 posts. That particular post could have been viewed by people who had no clue what the answer to her question was, outside "lurkers" who don't have accounts as well as by the original poster herself. Not that your intentions are good and meaningful, I just think it is important to note that the fact that it went unanswered does not necessarily show lack of care from members. Does that make any sense? Sometimes when I try to say something I don't paint the proper picture. Either way, I think it is very sweet of you to make such a huge effort to be nice to everyone. |
I agree as well. I know personally I read every thread in the recommendations forum, but I don't answer the ones I don't feel I can help with...and sometimes I'll read because I have a similar issue or question, and want to see what other members have to say in response. I do, however, see where you were coming from, and it's a point well-raised.
PS. Can I just say how I'm feeling like the tone of this thread is changing...it's gone from something heated and quite uncomfortable to something that feels like it can be productive. If we continue down this road of making suggestions, and talking things out like this, I think we can definitely improve the overall health of Specktra, and maybe be more welcoming to new members who may be hesitant to post. Thumbs up to all you ladies...THIS is why I keep coming back over and over again.
darkishstar
Well-known member
Quote:
I think you make a good point with this statement. I think what's key to not seeing negativity is when you're accepted and not entirely new anymore to the forum. Maybe if there's something we can do that will help all the newbies get accepted, i.e. help them out, answer their questions, include them in chatter, and welcome them, maybe they can see all the positive stuff as well and stop seeing the negativity that scares them away from posting.
Like I said earlier, it boils down to going to back to gushing about colors, sharing our love with make-up together and with everyone equally. Even if someone can't afford all the MAC in the world, even if she/he hasn't been on the forum for that long, we ALL love MAC, we ALL love make-up. There is no reason to shun or ignore anyone for not being able to spend on a collection or for not liking the same color you do (I'm not saying everyone necessarily does this, nor am I pointing at particular people, but I HAVE noticed this). I still gush/give opinions on colors/alternatives when I'm on a low/no buy time in my life. And even though it sucks that I can't join in on the fun in the buying, I can still enjoy myself talking about the colors, suggesting things, hearing what people love, and seeing all their wonderful swatches, FOTDs, faces, and everyone just having a good time. THAT's what made me love Specktra in the first place, that there were others out there that loved make-up as much as I do.
The solution?
Let go of all these opinions and higher-than-thou attitudes, talk to everyone, share the fun, band around this love of make-up!
That's not too hard is it? =)
| Originally Posted by Casadalinnis
I'm sure somebody will come along and post how they've never seen anything negative but it might mean it was because you've already been established and accepted. If you open your eyes that people are going through this, you might make them reach a point of making them established too. |
I think you make a good point with this statement. I think what's key to not seeing negativity is when you're accepted and not entirely new anymore to the forum. Maybe if there's something we can do that will help all the newbies get accepted, i.e. help them out, answer their questions, include them in chatter, and welcome them, maybe they can see all the positive stuff as well and stop seeing the negativity that scares them away from posting.
Like I said earlier, it boils down to going to back to gushing about colors, sharing our love with make-up together and with everyone equally. Even if someone can't afford all the MAC in the world, even if she/he hasn't been on the forum for that long, we ALL love MAC, we ALL love make-up. There is no reason to shun or ignore anyone for not being able to spend on a collection or for not liking the same color you do (I'm not saying everyone necessarily does this, nor am I pointing at particular people, but I HAVE noticed this). I still gush/give opinions on colors/alternatives when I'm on a low/no buy time in my life. And even though it sucks that I can't join in on the fun in the buying, I can still enjoy myself talking about the colors, suggesting things, hearing what people love, and seeing all their wonderful swatches, FOTDs, faces, and everyone just having a good time. THAT's what made me love Specktra in the first place, that there were others out there that loved make-up as much as I do.
The solution?
Let go of all these opinions and higher-than-thou attitudes, talk to everyone, share the fun, band around this love of make-up!
ForgetRegret
Well-known member
Quote:
Girl...you write some novels around here sometimes, but damned if I don't agree with 99% of what you're saying. And that statement up there...I couldn't agree more. When I first started lurking around here and posting, it was all in the makeup type threads, but there have been quite a few times when I've posted problems, rants, raves, etc in chatter or deep thoughts, and the support and suggestions I've received from you ladies and gents was just mindblowing. To see that people you don't even know aside from this website care enough to offer you an idea, support, or kind words when you need it speaks volumes about this place.
Quote:
I agree completely with this...even if I have absolutely NO money to buy anything, let alone makeup, I still love talking about it...I think for most of us here it's well beyond "hobby" status, and I know for me it's become a passion...and I never get tired of talking about something I'm passionate about. I'll admit I haven't seen people being shunned or ignored for not being able to buy, or not liking something that the masses adore, but then again, I don't spend a lot of time in the color story threads and such, so it's probable that I'm just not viewing those particular threads that seem to generate the animosity. Either way, as long as we all keep in mind that we're here for a common love, I think we'll be fine.
| Originally Posted by Casadalinnis
People probably won't get this whatsoever but I have seen positives in my life because of this site. |
Girl...you write some novels around here sometimes, but damned if I don't agree with 99% of what you're saying. And that statement up there...I couldn't agree more. When I first started lurking around here and posting, it was all in the makeup type threads, but there have been quite a few times when I've posted problems, rants, raves, etc in chatter or deep thoughts, and the support and suggestions I've received from you ladies and gents was just mindblowing. To see that people you don't even know aside from this website care enough to offer you an idea, support, or kind words when you need it speaks volumes about this place.
Quote:
| Originally Posted by darkishstar
Like I said earlier, it boils down to going to back to gushing about colors, sharing our love with make-up together and with everyone equally. Even if someone can't afford all the MAC in the world, even if she/he hasn't been on the forum for that long, we ALL love MAC, we ALL love make-up. There is no reason to shun or ignore anyone for not being able to spend on a collection or for not liking the same color you do (I'm not saying everyone necessarily does this, nor am I pointing at particular people, but I HAVE noticed this). I still gush/give opinions on colors/alternatives when I'm on a low/no buy time in my life. And even though it sucks that I can't join in on the fun in the buying, I can still enjoy myself talking about the colors, suggesting things, hearing what people love, and seeing all their wonderful swatches, FOTDs, faces, and everyone just having a good time. THAT's what made me love Specktra in the first place, that there were others out there that loved make-up as much as I do.
|
I agree completely with this...even if I have absolutely NO money to buy anything, let alone makeup, I still love talking about it...I think for most of us here it's well beyond "hobby" status, and I know for me it's become a passion...and I never get tired of talking about something I'm passionate about. I'll admit I haven't seen people being shunned or ignored for not being able to buy, or not liking something that the masses adore, but then again, I don't spend a lot of time in the color story threads and such, so it's probable that I'm just not viewing those particular threads that seem to generate the animosity. Either way, as long as we all keep in mind that we're here for a common love, I think we'll be fine.
