ThePerfectScore
Well-known member
So I think I have clarified any misunderstandings about my post. Sorry I did not include more context to explain what exactly I meant on the subject.
Why can't an ugly girl get a fine man? Yet an ugly man can date a super modle?
- Thread starter ThePerfectScore
- Start date
HeavenLeiBlu
Well-known member
Quote:
That's great, and I read the other thread that you're referring to. I do not think these two threads are related at all. Therefore, I'm talking about this one. I'm not talking about you in particular, I'm talking about people in general who have negative things to say about Tameka Foster Raymond.
I don't think I alluded to people calling her "dog faced" or otherwise ugly because she's a Black woman, I said that WOC seem to have the most pointed and mean spirited things to say about the woman, which I believe are for the same reasons I stated in my previous post in this thread. I'm also not asking that you be PC here or anywhere else. I like for people to speak what's actually on their hearts.
And why would YOU be bitter about what went on with Usher and Chilli? She's moved on, so has Usher...
you think they care about how you feel about the situation? Just sayin'.
Originally Posted by ThePerfectScore
And I am WOC... wrote a whole post about self- acceptance and love.. so check it out. I did not call her "dog faced" b/c she was black. In fact I refer to Miley Cyrus in this way all the time. I am not professing to being PC in the way I talk about celebrities with whom I have no actual contact with in real life. I'm just bitter about the whole Usher marriage b/c of they way he treated Chilli, allegedly. I don't know then or anything about their situation. But I loved her. And from what I heard he did not treat her with the respect she deserved! |
That's great, and I read the other thread that you're referring to. I do not think these two threads are related at all. Therefore, I'm talking about this one. I'm not talking about you in particular, I'm talking about people in general who have negative things to say about Tameka Foster Raymond.
I don't think I alluded to people calling her "dog faced" or otherwise ugly because she's a Black woman, I said that WOC seem to have the most pointed and mean spirited things to say about the woman, which I believe are for the same reasons I stated in my previous post in this thread. I'm also not asking that you be PC here or anywhere else. I like for people to speak what's actually on their hearts.
And why would YOU be bitter about what went on with Usher and Chilli? She's moved on, so has Usher...
X4biddenxLustX
Well-known member
Quote:
This has been a subject I've wondered a lot about too! Not to be mean but sometimes I'll wonder how a guy with good looks ends up with a less than average or just average girl. And vice versa. The whole human attraction thing is just very interesting to me.
I'd like to say that I'm an average looking gal (only when I have makeup on, without it it's a different story lol). I don't have the best body. No flat toned stomach. Slight love-handles. Super short. For the longest time I usually got with less than average looking guys (also with LESS than average personalities too) and occasionally a decent looking guy would be thrown in there. At that time I didn't want to be considered "shallow" and allowed almost every tom dick and harry that wasn't completely hideous into my life, just as long as he was interested in me. I'd grow to like them or more like forced myself eventually.
But about 2 years ago I got involved with a guy who I'd consider very attractive, the best looking guy I've ever had anything with. He had nice eyes, and a great body. He was pretty sweet with me. Again I'm not physically perfect and was nowhere a 10, not then not now. I found that his attractive looks came with a much more attractive personality than all the less than or average guys I had gotten with. I mean yeah at the end of the day he's still a guy but I was COMPLETELY attracted to this guy.
| Originally Posted by ThePerfectScore
OOh Yeah I think beauty does have a lot to do with confidence and the way a person carries his or herself. "Swagger" has a lot to do with why I'm attracted to a person. |
This has been a subject I've wondered a lot about too! Not to be mean but sometimes I'll wonder how a guy with good looks ends up with a less than average or just average girl. And vice versa. The whole human attraction thing is just very interesting to me.
I'd like to say that I'm an average looking gal (only when I have makeup on, without it it's a different story lol). I don't have the best body. No flat toned stomach. Slight love-handles. Super short. For the longest time I usually got with less than average looking guys (also with LESS than average personalities too) and occasionally a decent looking guy would be thrown in there. At that time I didn't want to be considered "shallow" and allowed almost every tom dick and harry that wasn't completely hideous into my life, just as long as he was interested in me. I'd grow to like them or more like forced myself eventually.
But about 2 years ago I got involved with a guy who I'd consider very attractive, the best looking guy I've ever had anything with. He had nice eyes, and a great body. He was pretty sweet with me. Again I'm not physically perfect and was nowhere a 10, not then not now. I found that his attractive looks came with a much more attractive personality than all the less than or average guys I had gotten with. I mean yeah at the end of the day he's still a guy but I was COMPLETELY attracted to this guy.
mtrimier
Well-known member
I can't, and won't, even try to explain attraction. Hell, I scratch my own damn head at some of the things that catch my eye every once in a while.
I'd say I'm "okay" looking, I get looks, so I guess I am not hideous.
I think I get more interest because of my "swagger", if that's what it is. I just don't care about guys, so they tend to have this odd compulsion to talk to me. (I mean this in the sense of not looking for anyone at the moment, and just enjoying my own skin.)
Ramble aside, I think it just boils down to personality and in some instances maturity levels.
You can be the most beautiful person in the world or the hunchback of Notre Dame, but if you have a fucked up attitude or are so unhappy with yourself that you leave fume trails, don't expect people to be banging down your door.
I have heard some of my attractive guy friends say things about a woman's body, and then end it with "but she has a fucked up grill/eye/whatever". Those are the players.
I guess it just really boils down to the individual cases and what exactly they are out looking for.
I dunno. this probably didn't even make any sense. low blood sugar and sleepy don't mix with keyboards.
I'd say I'm "okay" looking, I get looks, so I guess I am not hideous.
I think I get more interest because of my "swagger", if that's what it is. I just don't care about guys, so they tend to have this odd compulsion to talk to me. (I mean this in the sense of not looking for anyone at the moment, and just enjoying my own skin.)
Ramble aside, I think it just boils down to personality and in some instances maturity levels.
You can be the most beautiful person in the world or the hunchback of Notre Dame, but if you have a fucked up attitude or are so unhappy with yourself that you leave fume trails, don't expect people to be banging down your door.
I have heard some of my attractive guy friends say things about a woman's body, and then end it with "but she has a fucked up grill/eye/whatever". Those are the players.
I guess it just really boils down to the individual cases and what exactly they are out looking for.
I dunno. this probably didn't even make any sense. low blood sugar and sleepy don't mix with keyboards.
kdemers1221
Well-known member
Quote:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just because you don't find the women attractive doesn't mean that he doesn't see her as the most beautiful women in the room. There is obviously something he finds attractive about her otherwise they wouldn't be together.
| Originally Posted by X4biddenxLustX
This has been a subject I've wondered a lot about too! Not to be mean but sometimes I'll wonder how a guy with good looks ends up with a less than average or just average girl. And vice versa. The whole human attraction thing is just very interesting to me. |
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just because you don't find the women attractive doesn't mean that he doesn't see her as the most beautiful women in the room. There is obviously something he finds attractive about her otherwise they wouldn't be together.
X4biddenxLustX
Well-known member
Quote:
Yeah I guess so. I've found that a lot of my friends most of the time have quite a different outlook on what being attractive is when it comes to guys. We usually don't do much agreeing on men besides the few odd ones that somehow meet all of our "attractive" expectations.
| Originally Posted by kdemers1221
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just because you don't find the women attractive doesn't mean that he doesn't see her as the most beautiful women in the room. There is obviously something he finds attractive about her otherwise they wouldn't be together. |
Yeah I guess so. I've found that a lot of my friends most of the time have quite a different outlook on what being attractive is when it comes to guys. We usually don't do much agreeing on men besides the few odd ones that somehow meet all of our "attractive" expectations.
ncsugrl09
Well-known member
Quote:
I second this...my friends and I have very different opinions on what's attractive and what's not...so it's hard to compare couples on a standard. And like someone said earlier, the 'not so attractive woman' is probably attractive to guy she's with...you just may not find her attractive yourself. I don't think it should matter anyway, as long as the people in the relationship find their partners attractive it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. I do get your point though, but I really think it's a matter of opinion and the person seeing the attractiveness of the other person in a different way then perhaps others do.
| Originally Posted by X4biddenxLustX
Yeah I guess so. I've found that a lot of my friends most of the time have quite a different outlook on what being attractive is when it comes to guys. We usually don't do much agreeing on men besides the few odd ones that somehow meet all of our "attractive" expectations. |
I second this...my friends and I have very different opinions on what's attractive and what's not...so it's hard to compare couples on a standard. And like someone said earlier, the 'not so attractive woman' is probably attractive to guy she's with...you just may not find her attractive yourself. I don't think it should matter anyway, as long as the people in the relationship find their partners attractive it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. I do get your point though, but I really think it's a matter of opinion and the person seeing the attractiveness of the other person in a different way then perhaps others do.
reesesilverstar
Well-known member
Quote:
I was wondering who else at the end of this thread would feel the same way I did from the beginning... Thanks Tish...
Originally Posted by TISH1127
|
I was wondering who else at the end of this thread would feel the same way I did from the beginning... Thanks Tish...
chocolategoddes
Well-known member
Wow! I was thinking about starting a thread like this.
I was watching this Youtube video and the topic was discussed.
YouTube - Dude, He's Hot, She's Not.
I was watching this Youtube video and the topic was discussed.
YouTube - Dude, He's Hot, She's Not.
TISH1124
Well-known member
i think we allow ourselves to get caught up in celebrities lives to damn much...they can date who they want...marry who they want.....like who they like...why do we have to approve of their choices and who they want to be with...Looks are not what makes a relationship work...all men are not looking for just a trophy ...but for substance as well... To be Bitter about people we don't even know....that is just ...ok...just crazy as hell to me....
Ok I'm done...But wtf
Ok I'm done...But wtf
ClaireAvril
Well-known member
who the hell are we to judge someone else's opinion.
chocolategoddes
Well-known member
If an ugly man is dating a supermodel, chances are he's either rich, funny, or has a big dick.
LoveMakeup4Real
Well-known member
I find that those who are worried and too focused about how other people look are those that are more than likely very insecure/ have low self-esteem…just a thought. Btw, I think it's really immature/childish to make fun of the way someone looks; they were born that way (it's not like they had the choice to choose exactly how they wanted to look before being born and leaving the womb to enter this cruel, shallow world). Besides, if these people are happy with the way they look, isn’t that all that matters?!? I mean, aren't we all human, don't we all have the same bodily functions, operate the same; I don't know but I try to look deeper than the superficial attributes that one possess such as a great personality, loving individual, positive attitude, etc. There is more than meets the eye.
I guess the more mature you get the more you realize that looks aren't all that important nor is it everything in life. Try to look beyond the outer layer and see beauty in everyone. These people may be what some would quickly deem as “ugly” but someone may find you unattractive as well, not everyone will think you’re attractive nor anyone else, we all have our own definition of beauty. Seriously, I think it’s time to shift your focus on more important matters than consuming all that energy on the way people live their lives and who they so choose to be with. Remember also that celebrities are only people as well. No need to place them on a pedestal. Take care.
I guess the more mature you get the more you realize that looks aren't all that important nor is it everything in life. Try to look beyond the outer layer and see beauty in everyone. These people may be what some would quickly deem as “ugly” but someone may find you unattractive as well, not everyone will think you’re attractive nor anyone else, we all have our own definition of beauty. Seriously, I think it’s time to shift your focus on more important matters than consuming all that energy on the way people live their lives and who they so choose to be with. Remember also that celebrities are only people as well. No need to place them on a pedestal. Take care.
HeavenLeiBlu
Well-known member
Quote:
Trust me, a big dick only does so far ('scuse the pun) if the owner doesn't know what he's doing. Funny loses it's gleam after a while if there's nothing else to the dude... but money... well... LOL
| Originally Posted by chocolategoddes
If an ugly man is dating a supermodel, chances are he's either rich, funny, or has a big dick. |
Trust me, a big dick only does so far ('scuse the pun) if the owner doesn't know what he's doing. Funny loses it's gleam after a while if there's nothing else to the dude... but money... well... LOL
ThePerfectScore
Well-known member
Quote:
I just thought they were the cutest looking couple~ Chili has a house near where I live in Atlanta and I used to see her and usher riding in the car... It was just so cute.... alas.... all that glitter's aint gold... So their relationship looked good on the outside, but I honestly have no clue about what went on with their actual relationship, only they know what happened btw them.
| Originally Posted by HeavenLeiBlu
That's great, and I read the other thread that you're referring to. I do not think these two threads are related at all. Therefore, I'm talking about this one. I'm not talking about you in particular, I'm talking about people in general who have negative things to say about Tameka Foster Raymond. I don't think I alluded to people calling her "dog faced" or otherwise ugly because she's a Black woman, I said that WOC seem to have the most pointed and mean spirited things to say about the woman, which I believe are for the same reasons I stated in my previous post in this thread. I'm also not asking that you be PC here or anywhere else. I like for people to speak what's actually on their hearts. And why would YOU be bitter about what went on with Usher and Chilli? She's moved on, so has Usher...
|
I just thought they were the cutest looking couple~ Chili has a house near where I live in Atlanta and I used to see her and usher riding in the car... It was just so cute.... alas.... all that glitter's aint gold... So their relationship looked good on the outside, but I honestly have no clue about what went on with their actual relationship, only they know what happened btw them.
ThePerfectScore
Well-known member
that's all fine and dandy people.... I was just wondering why on average you see attractive women with less attractive men. I just think the not so conventionally attractive girls not to get over looked. It just puzzles me how it seem as more acceptable for a guy to date a girl just for her looks, but when a girl does the same thing its a bad situation. And I know how important personality is to a relationship. But there is definitely a double standard when it comes to who can be the less attractive one in the relationship. Men are totally socialized to focus on the physical characteristics of a women. While women are socialized to be more into the emotional and personality side of things. Hmm Maybe there are the occasional cougars who get their kept men. But come on lets face it sugar daddy's run rampted and are accepted. I just look at that tv show the millionaire match maker and that really reflects what's deemed important in our society. A creepy rich old man can get a beautifil supermodel and ppl accept it. But flip the script an average looking woman with a supermodel man and people, even my self start to whisper about what he sees in her. Maybe we ask this out of jealousy? and another thing I am not losing sleep when it comes to Usher and whomever he dates. Everyone has an opinion about celebrities, comes with the territory of fame. So don't think I'm pathetic for having a strong opinion about how I percieve these relationships, becuase when it comes down to it, it's just entertainment (even though it might be at the expense of others that's the price you pay in show biz.)
leenybeeny
Well-known member
I'm sorry but this whole thread just makes me angry. The fact that people take the time to even notice or care that one person is good looking while the other person is not really pisses me off.
My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever knew, and after radiation treatment left her badly scarred and burned all over her face and all her body, it was the people who would even QUESTION why my father would be with someone who looked like her made her so self conscious that she would not leave the house if her two hour burn makeup routine didn't leave her looking PERFECT.
THIS kind of thing made her more depressed than the fact that she could barely walk, that she couldn't get up off the damn toilet by herself. That was nothing in comparison to the fact that people would say "why is he with her??"
I know you understand that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you don't get the double standard as far as men and women go, but even asking the question can be hurtful. Just take it for what it is. You're either attracted to someone or you're not. Why try to analyze it?
Sorry if I am way off base here and maybe I am still not understanding the point of this, but I just don't get the point of it.
My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever knew, and after radiation treatment left her badly scarred and burned all over her face and all her body, it was the people who would even QUESTION why my father would be with someone who looked like her made her so self conscious that she would not leave the house if her two hour burn makeup routine didn't leave her looking PERFECT.
THIS kind of thing made her more depressed than the fact that she could barely walk, that she couldn't get up off the damn toilet by herself. That was nothing in comparison to the fact that people would say "why is he with her??"
I know you understand that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you don't get the double standard as far as men and women go, but even asking the question can be hurtful. Just take it for what it is. You're either attracted to someone or you're not. Why try to analyze it?
Sorry if I am way off base here and maybe I am still not understanding the point of this, but I just don't get the point of it.
ThePerfectScore
Well-known member
Quote:
I applaud your mother and your family for getting though such a trying time in her life. You and your father are truely wonderful people for supporting your mother.
Why try to analyze it, because it's in my nature to do so and gain the opinions of others. I am a double psychology and sociology major, I want to know why society and people are the way they are. And I know y'all look at couple walking down the street and make a snap judgment about the couple based on physical appearances. Don't try to tell me you haven't. So I just wonder why ppl have these thoughts, preconceived notions, and what happens when a couple deviates from the norm.
| Originally Posted by leenybeeny
I'm sorry but this whole thread just makes me angry. The fact that people take the time to even notice or care that one person is good looking while the other person is not really pisses me off. My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever knew, and after radiation treatment left her badly scarred and burned all over her face and all her body, it was the people who would even QUESTION why my father would be with someone who looked like her made her so self conscious that she would not leave the house if her two hour burn makeup routine didn't leave her looking PERFECT. THIS kind of thing made her more depressed than the fact that she could barely walk, that she couldn't get up off the damn toilet by herself. That was nothing in comparison to the fact that people would say "why is he with her??" I know you understand that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you don't get the double standard as far as men and women go, but even asking the question can be hurtful. Just take it for what it is. You're either attracted to someone or you're not. Why try to analyze it? Sorry if I am way off base here and maybe I am still not understanding the point of this, but I just don't get the point of it. |
I applaud your mother and your family for getting though such a trying time in her life. You and your father are truely wonderful people for supporting your mother.
Why try to analyze it, because it's in my nature to do so and gain the opinions of others. I am a double psychology and sociology major, I want to know why society and people are the way they are. And I know y'all look at couple walking down the street and make a snap judgment about the couple based on physical appearances. Don't try to tell me you haven't. So I just wonder why ppl have these thoughts, preconceived notions, and what happens when a couple deviates from the norm.
