Do other females act hostile towards you (aka, why do girls hate me)?
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S.S.BlackOrchid
Well-known member
Quote:
Wow, that's terrible that you experience that. I'm a cop too, and my female coworkers have generally been cool and helpful.
Originally Posted by NatalieR429
Girls girls girls I feel ya. Try being a cop. There are so few of us and the ones that are vets seem to be so clicky and idk its like they dont wanna help bring us up and teach us. I work in a mans field and I hope I ALWAYS try to help my sisters out. We gotta stick together whatever field we work in. Im so sick of seeing girls trying to bring other girls down. I could rant and rave for hours but I dont think I will Im sure you get it. cant we all just get along ?? lol |
Wow, that's terrible that you experience that. I'm a cop too, and my female coworkers have generally been cool and helpful.
shimmyshimmyya
Well-known member
For me, both guys and girls can be hostile towards me. LOL It's interesting...
From the black girls, someone always had a damn comment about my hair, or outfit or the way I spoke because apparently I "talked white". It's gotten better since high school, but I usually take the higher road when things like this happen. Sometimes when I'm in a bad mood, I'll confront them.
Guys are can be hostile towards me because they look at me and think I'm too good for them, or stuck up. They are pleasantly surprised when they find out I'm not.
I don't feel you have to befriend all these females, but some of them are not worth it. It is hard to make friends with females and it gets harder when you get older.
From the black girls, someone always had a damn comment about my hair, or outfit or the way I spoke because apparently I "talked white". It's gotten better since high school, but I usually take the higher road when things like this happen. Sometimes when I'm in a bad mood, I'll confront them.
Guys are can be hostile towards me because they look at me and think I'm too good for them, or stuck up. They are pleasantly surprised when they find out I'm not.
I don't feel you have to befriend all these females, but some of them are not worth it. It is hard to make friends with females and it gets harder when you get older.
Lauren1981
Well-known member
as annoying as it is, it's just a sign of insecurity & jealousy.
and it's not just women. men do the same thing to each other, yet in different ways.
it's just the way a LOT of ppl are. expect that (i'm not saying accept it tho). the better you do, the more you'll feel the negativity from ppl. it's intimidation.
and it's not you. if it wasn't you it'd be someone else. just keep doing what you're doing by acting unaffected. it's an attempt to get under your skin. some ppl hate to see others succeed and exceed. some hate to see ppl doing something they never thought of. and some just hate being intimidated and will do what they can to TRY and make you feel the same way they do.
so, imo, even if it does bother the shit out of you, never let them see that because then they've won, feel me??
and it's not just women. men do the same thing to each other, yet in different ways.
it's just the way a LOT of ppl are. expect that (i'm not saying accept it tho). the better you do, the more you'll feel the negativity from ppl. it's intimidation.
and it's not you. if it wasn't you it'd be someone else. just keep doing what you're doing by acting unaffected. it's an attempt to get under your skin. some ppl hate to see others succeed and exceed. some hate to see ppl doing something they never thought of. and some just hate being intimidated and will do what they can to TRY and make you feel the same way they do.
so, imo, even if it does bother the shit out of you, never let them see that because then they've won, feel me??
minni4bebe
Well-known member
Wow, I saw this thread and had to post. Ever since grade school, girls have been super hostile towards me. I was the only multi-raciall girl in the school and they made sure I knew it. And then when I was around the other kids like me around town they would tell me I was just like a "white girl". I was the first one to grow breasts, therefore I was called names bc the boys would look at me and by HS I was a slut even tho I was still a virgin. I'm 24 now and to this day, women judge me as soon as I walk into a room. I don't have to say a word but they already assume I am a bitch...trust me, I'm not! And Lauren1981 is right, it's pure envy and jealousy. Unfortunately, I didn't realize that until I finished school.
FlashBang
Well-known member
I like these threads, they make me feel better - ok that sounds weird, I mean it as in, Im glad im i can read about other people dealing with this.
Ok so I dont pretend to be above the b*tchiness but I know for a fact I dont partake anywhere near as much as some girls, the reason being is that from a very young age, Ive been on the receiving end and I would hate to think I made anybody feel the way I was made to feel for 8 years.
There are girls who are far worse than others and the b*tchiness manifests out of envy and insecurity. When I look at celebs I cant help but envy some of them, for their looks, their success but I dont hate them for it, I just think 'wow'. And that goes for any other girl I meet.
At my old, female dominated, workplace I remember a woman (27 years old) being promoted to manager. She was smart, sensible, hard working and very f*cking good at her job and more than deserved it. She had, however worked there for only a few years and some of the other women who applied for the position had been there for years and years. No surprise there was plenty of cattiness and one woman in my team was very bitter, making remarks and commenting on how when the new manager first started working there, she was the one who trained her.
I was eventually bullied out of my work place by a girl called yvonne. When i first started, they hadnt hired people for a long time and it was quite unusual for new people to come into that workplace in that dept so naturally there was a lot of fuss. It was my 1st job so i was pretty niaive with how everything worked, i hardly noticed that she was the only one who, literally, hadnt said a work to me.
At first i was supposed to be temp, but because i was good they wanted to take me on perm, surely enough, problems started arising.
Long story short, over the next year and a half i was subjected to b*tchiness (both inside and outside of work, at team dos etc) isolation, sh*t stirring, rumours etc. By the time I left I was distraught and even now i cant believe it happened.
Worse yet, my own manager who i eventually confided in, tried to make out that it was all in my head! At first i believed her until one of my colleagues told me that it had happened before in the past, and that girl ended up leaving! Then at a work colleagues leaving do, the girl who was leaving started talking to me about the team etc and as soon as i mentioned i was having problems with a girl, she interupted and said 'is it that b*tch yvonne? be careful of her, shes awful'.
Yvonne had quite a rep that was heavily disguided by sweet visage and false diplomatic stance on the workplace. A little bit of info on her; she was engaged to a no good, sponging and truly vulgar man who had cheated on her (she didnt know), was in a dead end job (she had neither the interlect nor the incentive to progress) constantly trying to lose weight (but doing nothing to lose it!) and caning the sunbeds till she looked orange. Ok now that was b*tchy, but at least it was provoked...
Ok so I dont pretend to be above the b*tchiness but I know for a fact I dont partake anywhere near as much as some girls, the reason being is that from a very young age, Ive been on the receiving end and I would hate to think I made anybody feel the way I was made to feel for 8 years.
There are girls who are far worse than others and the b*tchiness manifests out of envy and insecurity. When I look at celebs I cant help but envy some of them, for their looks, their success but I dont hate them for it, I just think 'wow'. And that goes for any other girl I meet.
At my old, female dominated, workplace I remember a woman (27 years old) being promoted to manager. She was smart, sensible, hard working and very f*cking good at her job and more than deserved it. She had, however worked there for only a few years and some of the other women who applied for the position had been there for years and years. No surprise there was plenty of cattiness and one woman in my team was very bitter, making remarks and commenting on how when the new manager first started working there, she was the one who trained her.
I was eventually bullied out of my work place by a girl called yvonne. When i first started, they hadnt hired people for a long time and it was quite unusual for new people to come into that workplace in that dept so naturally there was a lot of fuss. It was my 1st job so i was pretty niaive with how everything worked, i hardly noticed that she was the only one who, literally, hadnt said a work to me.
At first i was supposed to be temp, but because i was good they wanted to take me on perm, surely enough, problems started arising.
Long story short, over the next year and a half i was subjected to b*tchiness (both inside and outside of work, at team dos etc) isolation, sh*t stirring, rumours etc. By the time I left I was distraught and even now i cant believe it happened.
Worse yet, my own manager who i eventually confided in, tried to make out that it was all in my head! At first i believed her until one of my colleagues told me that it had happened before in the past, and that girl ended up leaving! Then at a work colleagues leaving do, the girl who was leaving started talking to me about the team etc and as soon as i mentioned i was having problems with a girl, she interupted and said 'is it that b*tch yvonne? be careful of her, shes awful'.
Yvonne had quite a rep that was heavily disguided by sweet visage and false diplomatic stance on the workplace. A little bit of info on her; she was engaged to a no good, sponging and truly vulgar man who had cheated on her (she didnt know), was in a dead end job (she had neither the interlect nor the incentive to progress) constantly trying to lose weight (but doing nothing to lose it!) and caning the sunbeds till she looked orange. Ok now that was b*tchy, but at least it was provoked...
crystalclear
Well-known member
This really does remind me of when I was at school. When I was 12 I was 5ft 7 and a dress size 10 (UK- US 6) and I could easily pass for a 16-18 year old. Most of the girls in my school (a pretty bad one) were not even 5ft and looked like little girls, almost immediately (i.e once they realised that actually I'm pretty shy and quiet) the nastiness erupted and was constantly told that I was fat, ugly, stupid etc, when I started to wear makeup I was a slut (when they started they wore a ton of makeup and it was always bright orange foundation, pale blue e/s and frosted pink l/s that frankly I've never seen sold anywhere and all really badly applied) and this went on for 4 years (until they left school). Unfortunately, I let it get to me and developed some bad eating habits ( which I still have) which made it worse and due to the stress (and dyslexia) did really poorly in school, the worst thing is though none of them were particuarly bright and most of them are now really overweight and dont have the height compensation, yet they still think they're better than everyone else. At the time my Mum told me it was jelousy, I didn't believe her, but with hindsight I can see that it's true they were so jelousy it drove them crazy but rather than leave me alone they decided to destroy me. Since school I haven't experienced much of this but I have noticed that now I'm a student in a highly competitive area (law) the bitches are making themselves known, not in a highly obvious way (yet- it's only year 1) but again they seem to zero in on 1) how you look, i.e makeup etc 2) Are you doing better than them 3) are you prettier (because apparently males will employ only the best looking even if they are thick- I know wtf?
, they're going to employ an incompetant airhead who'll make them look stupid and lose them business, JUST so they'll have something nice to look at) and 4) If they're capable of making you so unhappy you drop out it increases their chances of getting on in the profession. This is the attitude of the some of the guys as well as some of the girls.
Sadly these idiots do exist and ignoring them wont make them go away a proactive stance is needed. The sooner employers take them in hand the better since an unhappy workforce, is rarely as successful as it should be.
Sadly these idiots do exist and ignoring them wont make them go away a proactive stance is needed. The sooner employers take them in hand the better since an unhappy workforce, is rarely as successful as it should be.
lelaelena
Member
Oh you are most definitely not the only one.
I "developed" way too early compared to other girls, so by the time I was 14 I had learned a good defense mechanism for bitchiness.
Feed off it.
Literally.
Because as others said, it is jealousy. Now if you're good at dismissing it power to you, but I know I'm not. Either it eats away at me or I use it to my advantage.
To this day, if I'm out with friends, dancing and there's guys looking, there will inevitably be the snoots that give me the evil eye. Either they're revolting looking, or too shy to dance, have fun and let go like I can. Either way, all that does is pump up my ego.
Honestly, girl's jealousy does more for my ego than any guys hoots or hollers. I just use it, shaky hair in their face and exagerate my hip shaking even more.
If I'm in a situation where I need to be on good terms with them, such as work, I just bring myself down to their level, during breaks and such. Not that I make fun of other girls (I only do that to those who do it to me) but I shake the impression that I'm an impenetrable ball of confidence. I'll put all my flaws on the table, physical and inside.
One of the best ways to start bonding with other women is to start talking about your cellulite. EVERY single female I get into cellulite talks with feels like my best friend, even though she may not have liked me before.
It takes years of practice and calculation, but you have to learn that bringing yourself down (not working to your best potential, not having fun when you go out just to avoid looking like a slut, etc etc) is only hurting you. You can use your vulnerabilities to your advantage in certain situations, but for most cases, even just walking to your favorite lunch place from work, feed off of the dirty stares or the obvious backtalking. Use it to pump up your confidence. Consider it like an invisible heel, pushup bra, fake eyelash, etc etc.
It's the only method that's worked for me.
I "developed" way too early compared to other girls, so by the time I was 14 I had learned a good defense mechanism for bitchiness.
Feed off it.
Literally.
Because as others said, it is jealousy. Now if you're good at dismissing it power to you, but I know I'm not. Either it eats away at me or I use it to my advantage.
To this day, if I'm out with friends, dancing and there's guys looking, there will inevitably be the snoots that give me the evil eye. Either they're revolting looking, or too shy to dance, have fun and let go like I can. Either way, all that does is pump up my ego.
Honestly, girl's jealousy does more for my ego than any guys hoots or hollers. I just use it, shaky hair in their face and exagerate my hip shaking even more.
If I'm in a situation where I need to be on good terms with them, such as work, I just bring myself down to their level, during breaks and such. Not that I make fun of other girls (I only do that to those who do it to me) but I shake the impression that I'm an impenetrable ball of confidence. I'll put all my flaws on the table, physical and inside.
One of the best ways to start bonding with other women is to start talking about your cellulite. EVERY single female I get into cellulite talks with feels like my best friend, even though she may not have liked me before.
It takes years of practice and calculation, but you have to learn that bringing yourself down (not working to your best potential, not having fun when you go out just to avoid looking like a slut, etc etc) is only hurting you. You can use your vulnerabilities to your advantage in certain situations, but for most cases, even just walking to your favorite lunch place from work, feed off of the dirty stares or the obvious backtalking. Use it to pump up your confidence. Consider it like an invisible heel, pushup bra, fake eyelash, etc etc.
It's the only method that's worked for me.
Septemba
Well-known member
Quote:
I do this too, and it has been so good for me. I think a lot people have insecurities and experiences that lead them to pass quick judgements or have misconceptions about people, and finding the positives can be hard but is so worth it. Anger and jealousy can be very self-destructive and uncomfortable, finding the good in others has made me feel better about myself.
| Originally Posted by benzito_714
when i find myself 'hating' on another woman i force myself to compliment her-in my thoughts or aloud. when you get past your own insecurities its easy to find the beauty in yourself and others. |
I do this too, and it has been so good for me. I think a lot people have insecurities and experiences that lead them to pass quick judgements or have misconceptions about people, and finding the positives can be hard but is so worth it. Anger and jealousy can be very self-destructive and uncomfortable, finding the good in others has made me feel better about myself.
hotmodelchiq
Well-known member
Quote:
I agree... those are called HATERS lol and I love them... as long as you have them it means your doing something right
I found that I have to be OVERLY nice to females and its sooo annoying
| Originally Posted by chocolategoddes
Yes, females seem to be naturally bitchy, emotional, and jealous. I usually don't notice when girls talk bout me because i'm just kinda chill and i dn't like to get involved in the cattiness. But I hear the things they have to say.You're not alone. |
I agree... those are called HATERS lol and I love them... as long as you have them it means your doing something right
gigiopolis
Well-known member
I find it hard to believe that any single woman could come across a whole slew of women that don't like her, and the reason for that is just that other women are bitchy. Really? All women that you know and have ever met are bitches?
All I'm going to say is...it takes two hands to clap.
All I'm going to say is...it takes two hands to clap.
Makeupaddict88
Well-known member
For me, the turning point realizing girls weren't all that nice was probably around 8th grade. I had a serious growth spurt that went straight to my chest. I came back to school that fall and it seemed that I had all the attention of the boys. I didn't care because I only cared about cheerleading and doing good in school. They didn't like that though. All the popular girls started calling me names and spreading rumors about me and in the locker room it would be name calling the whole entire time.
Come high school I decided that I wasn't going to let those girls get to me so I started mouthing off to them when they started up with me. They really didn't like that so they started writing stuff in the bathroom stalls about how they should call me for a good time and all that non sense. I would get picked up day in and day out only because they didn't like the fact that I yelled back or one of their "popular" boys talked to me. Now that I'm in college, I see those girls all the time and they are doing nothing with their lives. They still live off of mommy and daddys money and do nothing. I feel so much better knowing that I am going somewhere in my life and I'm not doing nothing sitting around.
Come high school I decided that I wasn't going to let those girls get to me so I started mouthing off to them when they started up with me. They really didn't like that so they started writing stuff in the bathroom stalls about how they should call me for a good time and all that non sense. I would get picked up day in and day out only because they didn't like the fact that I yelled back or one of their "popular" boys talked to me. Now that I'm in college, I see those girls all the time and they are doing nothing with their lives. They still live off of mommy and daddys money and do nothing. I feel so much better knowing that I am going somewhere in my life and I'm not doing nothing sitting around.
FullWroth
Well-known member
Quote:
YES. Thank you. So glad I'm not the only one who gets this.
| Originally Posted by gigiopolis
I find it hard to believe that any single woman could come across a whole slew of woman that don't like her, and the reason for that is just that other women are bitchy. Really? All women that you know and have ever met are bitches? All I'm going to say is...it takes two hands to clap. |
YES. Thank you. So glad I'm not the only one who gets this.
ginger9
Well-known member
Here's another slant on this topic...
The way I see it men can be just as mean and vicious towards each other as women. The reason why some women may perceive other women as being harsher, is partly because men, in general, do not behave that way towards women. By that I mean the type of competitive, aggressive behaviour that occurs within groups of the same sex is not present with members of the opposite sex.
For example, in my profession I happen to work with a bunch of guys. When they get going they can be super aggressive and try to dominate each other as alpha males but they don't react similarly around me, not because I'm cute or whatever but because I'm not perceived as a masculine threat. Just being a different sex invokes a neutered response out of them. I'm not saying it's better, or that I'm completely exempt from that type of behaviour but it is less evident and in a more toned down version if you will.
So yes, I think women can display hostility towards each other but not because women are b*tches (because men are the same way) but we as women bear that competitive nature within our own kind. Obviously this changes as we mature or grow confident within ourselves.
The way I see it men can be just as mean and vicious towards each other as women. The reason why some women may perceive other women as being harsher, is partly because men, in general, do not behave that way towards women. By that I mean the type of competitive, aggressive behaviour that occurs within groups of the same sex is not present with members of the opposite sex.
For example, in my profession I happen to work with a bunch of guys. When they get going they can be super aggressive and try to dominate each other as alpha males but they don't react similarly around me, not because I'm cute or whatever but because I'm not perceived as a masculine threat. Just being a different sex invokes a neutered response out of them. I'm not saying it's better, or that I'm completely exempt from that type of behaviour but it is less evident and in a more toned down version if you will.
So yes, I think women can display hostility towards each other but not because women are b*tches (because men are the same way) but we as women bear that competitive nature within our own kind. Obviously this changes as we mature or grow confident within ourselves.
FlashBang
Well-known member
^^I definitly agree with that!
God, i remember hanging out with a bunch of guys once (i was the only girl) and they started making nasty comments about a girl...then another, and another etc and before i knew it, they were b*tching like a bunch of girls! I was shocked at just how bad they got!
Ive noticed that when a guy is jealous of another guy, he'll call him 'gay', at least from my experience they have. I was talking about this new guy at work that all the other girls fancied too and this guy just goes 'urgh, hes gay!' ....right.....so i guess its just a funny coincidence that his 'bf' happens to look like a girl?
God, i remember hanging out with a bunch of guys once (i was the only girl) and they started making nasty comments about a girl...then another, and another etc and before i knew it, they were b*tching like a bunch of girls! I was shocked at just how bad they got!
Ive noticed that when a guy is jealous of another guy, he'll call him 'gay', at least from my experience they have. I was talking about this new guy at work that all the other girls fancied too and this guy just goes 'urgh, hes gay!' ....right.....so i guess its just a funny coincidence that his 'bf' happens to look like a girl?
luvsic
Well-known member
This is just definitely a side note, OP. This is my own personal experience for a situation similar, but not exact, to yours.
I consider myself a late bloomer in terms of appearance. All throughout middle school, and high school, I was unkempt and not considered pretty, to myself, or to others. When I started to become more interested in fashion and makeup, I found it confusing, and I never developed much self confidence for my outer appearance. I grew into my looks in college, but never truely believed myself to be as beautiful as some girls.
I had difficulties making friends, with either guys or girls, in high school and college. I had low self esteem growing up, so I would immediately get jealous of other girls who were more attractive than me, or who were more successful be it in friendships, relationships, school, or appearance. And I would gossip, and hate, sometimes, because I was under the notion that this person was better than me, and I felt inadequate. It was not healthy, but it was innate at that point, and all due to insecurity.
I felt like a lot of girls weren't interested in becoming my friends, either. It seemed like girls were constantly snooty towards me, or they'd overlook me and be clique-ish. When I went to college and joined a certain organization, someone started a rumor that I had plastic surgery. People talked behind my back, but this was only brought to my knowledge very few times. I wanted to tell myself that they were just haters, and in efforts to raise my self esteem, I told myself that every girl who gave me a "look", ignored me, or said bad things about me were jealous because I got some (not a lot, but some) attention from boys, and I had grown more into my looks. I had this constant "woe is me, nobody wants to be friends with me because all of these girls are jealous." attitude. But deep down, I really thought "woe is me, i'm not good/pretty enough so no girls want to talk to me." When I would be paranoid about situations, Nobody ever even suggested to me that these girls were jealous in the first place, I just tried to tell myself that to validate their actions.
But since then, I have taken a step back and realized that I was being completely and utterly self centered. A lot of the times, the girls I would think would hate me would actually never really talk about or comment on me much, and it was all in my head. I was completley just being paranoid. Of course this may not always be the case with everyone, but it certainly was for me. Once I realized that, everything became clear. I don't want to keep telling myself "girls are catty! i'm too good for them!" yet at the same time I refuse to keep telling myself "i'm not good enough to be friends with these girls." To me as of now, it is important to be happy and comfortable with who you are, regardless of what others think or say. Because in the end their opinions of you are irrelevent, what really matters is your opinion of yourself.
One thing that I learned is to block out everything that is negative. For whatever reason these girls aren't talking to you or are making snarky comments about you, it should be irrelevant, and it's useless to care about it. As long as you work towards being a good person who is true to herself, you will attract the right people and friends. And then, you will be surprised how quickly all of that negativity around you will just melt away. Focus on the good things, ignore the bad.
I am sure you have people who love you in your life, and that is much to be happy and grateful for! Still, to this day, I don't have that many friends but I still have a family that loves me, and that is a great gift I try to cherish while I can!
So, in the end, to answer your question, why do girls hate you? It really shouldn't matter why. If they are hostile towards you, they are, ok, go on your merry way. I know who I am, I worked hard to be where I am, you can say what you want. They will back off or get bored once they see that what they say doesn't effect you. Don't let them win at this game they play. In fact, don't even play in the first place. It's not worth your time.
In an ideal world, right? I know for a fact that this advice is hard to follow, especially for me, a girl who is trying to gain buckets of confidence to make up for all the times she had none. But when I feel down now, I always tell myself this to get me through the day. It is positive thinking and it really does help me cope with things!
Congrats on your promotion, and I hope this advice helped a little bit! I know I blabbed and more than likely got off topic, lol...but oh well. GL with things.
I consider myself a late bloomer in terms of appearance. All throughout middle school, and high school, I was unkempt and not considered pretty, to myself, or to others. When I started to become more interested in fashion and makeup, I found it confusing, and I never developed much self confidence for my outer appearance. I grew into my looks in college, but never truely believed myself to be as beautiful as some girls.
I had difficulties making friends, with either guys or girls, in high school and college. I had low self esteem growing up, so I would immediately get jealous of other girls who were more attractive than me, or who were more successful be it in friendships, relationships, school, or appearance. And I would gossip, and hate, sometimes, because I was under the notion that this person was better than me, and I felt inadequate. It was not healthy, but it was innate at that point, and all due to insecurity.
I felt like a lot of girls weren't interested in becoming my friends, either. It seemed like girls were constantly snooty towards me, or they'd overlook me and be clique-ish. When I went to college and joined a certain organization, someone started a rumor that I had plastic surgery. People talked behind my back, but this was only brought to my knowledge very few times. I wanted to tell myself that they were just haters, and in efforts to raise my self esteem, I told myself that every girl who gave me a "look", ignored me, or said bad things about me were jealous because I got some (not a lot, but some) attention from boys, and I had grown more into my looks. I had this constant "woe is me, nobody wants to be friends with me because all of these girls are jealous." attitude. But deep down, I really thought "woe is me, i'm not good/pretty enough so no girls want to talk to me." When I would be paranoid about situations, Nobody ever even suggested to me that these girls were jealous in the first place, I just tried to tell myself that to validate their actions.
But since then, I have taken a step back and realized that I was being completely and utterly self centered. A lot of the times, the girls I would think would hate me would actually never really talk about or comment on me much, and it was all in my head. I was completley just being paranoid. Of course this may not always be the case with everyone, but it certainly was for me. Once I realized that, everything became clear. I don't want to keep telling myself "girls are catty! i'm too good for them!" yet at the same time I refuse to keep telling myself "i'm not good enough to be friends with these girls." To me as of now, it is important to be happy and comfortable with who you are, regardless of what others think or say. Because in the end their opinions of you are irrelevent, what really matters is your opinion of yourself.
One thing that I learned is to block out everything that is negative. For whatever reason these girls aren't talking to you or are making snarky comments about you, it should be irrelevant, and it's useless to care about it. As long as you work towards being a good person who is true to herself, you will attract the right people and friends. And then, you will be surprised how quickly all of that negativity around you will just melt away. Focus on the good things, ignore the bad.
I am sure you have people who love you in your life, and that is much to be happy and grateful for! Still, to this day, I don't have that many friends but I still have a family that loves me, and that is a great gift I try to cherish while I can!
So, in the end, to answer your question, why do girls hate you? It really shouldn't matter why. If they are hostile towards you, they are, ok, go on your merry way. I know who I am, I worked hard to be where I am, you can say what you want. They will back off or get bored once they see that what they say doesn't effect you. Don't let them win at this game they play. In fact, don't even play in the first place. It's not worth your time.
In an ideal world, right? I know for a fact that this advice is hard to follow, especially for me, a girl who is trying to gain buckets of confidence to make up for all the times she had none. But when I feel down now, I always tell myself this to get me through the day. It is positive thinking and it really does help me cope with things!
Congrats on your promotion, and I hope this advice helped a little bit! I know I blabbed and more than likely got off topic, lol...but oh well. GL with things.
xxManBeaterxx
Well-known member
I try to be nice to everyone, pretty girls, drop dead gorgeous girls, bitchy girls, annoying girls, snobby girls who think they know it all, rich girls.... Well as long as they arent using me or bashing me behind my back its all good. Whether with school mates, co workers, or just people i meet in general since my husbands job is a very social one... i find that if i ask questions and act interested in the other persons life they really warm up to me. They key is i dont ever talk about myself with women, i let them complain, gossip and brag all they want and i guess thats why i never experience any of their cattiness towards me... Bascially ask a lot of questions and let them do the talking... Men are different... they key with them is to be funny and intelligent at the same time
..high school and college is a bit different though... im talking about adultish settings
..high school and college is a bit different though... im talking about adultish settings
BloodMittens
Well-known member
I feel you... like... really. It seems that the better you do, the worse people want to make you feel about it. They want to bring YOU down because you did good at something that they weren't noticed for. Hence: "I hate that b*tch because she got that promotion that *I* deserved!" Blah blah blah.
Girls in my group of friends used to hate on me because I actually know how to save my money instead of spending it like a crazy woman all over the place. I bought a Cadillac at age 18, sold it, and bought two different cars and I was the b*tch for it!?
Haters. I tell you. HATERS <3
Girls in my group of friends used to hate on me because I actually know how to save my money instead of spending it like a crazy woman all over the place. I bought a Cadillac at age 18, sold it, and bought two different cars and I was the b*tch for it!?
Haters. I tell you. HATERS <3
Mizz.Coppertone
Well-known member
I've had times like this too! It's so so obvious when ur watching a girls eyeballs look u up and down. It's so rude, I mean I get jealous of other girls looks too, but I would never scrunch my face and give her a dirty look just because she looks hot.
claralikesguts
Well-known member
i don't understand how some of you can actually say you love haters... every time i hear a nasty comment my self esteem drops 10 points. i can't be strong and ignore it because i've never done anything to anyone...
i've never really had a true 'best friend'. all girls i befriend end up using me, lying to me, abandoning me, talking behind my back, etcetera. and i can't make friends with boys without being called a slut, and anyways, i enjoy too much girly things to be friends with a boy. the only 'friend' i really have is my boyfriend... and since he is my SO, he doesn't really count. it's pretty much impossible to make new friends because 1) i'm terribly shy, 2) no one likes me, 3) everyone believes rumors they hear about me therefore they don't like me.
i don't hate any girls. i do get jealous, but not so much where it leads me to despise them. if you actually hate someone "just because"... please just put yourself in her shoes because really, i have no confidence because of girls and their catty behavior. it lead me to depression, self harm, and even a suicide attempt. i rarely get out of the house because i have no one to do anything with besides my bf and family, but it's not the same as having a true girl friend.
i've never really had a true 'best friend'. all girls i befriend end up using me, lying to me, abandoning me, talking behind my back, etcetera. and i can't make friends with boys without being called a slut, and anyways, i enjoy too much girly things to be friends with a boy. the only 'friend' i really have is my boyfriend... and since he is my SO, he doesn't really count. it's pretty much impossible to make new friends because 1) i'm terribly shy, 2) no one likes me, 3) everyone believes rumors they hear about me therefore they don't like me.
i don't hate any girls. i do get jealous, but not so much where it leads me to despise them. if you actually hate someone "just because"... please just put yourself in her shoes because really, i have no confidence because of girls and their catty behavior. it lead me to depression, self harm, and even a suicide attempt. i rarely get out of the house because i have no one to do anything with besides my bf and family, but it's not the same as having a true girl friend.
