Beauty Mark
Well-known member
The reasoning behind drugs being prosecuted rather harshly in the US is partially because of gang violence affiliated with dealing drugs.
my love was taken away from me
- Thread starter silversuniverse
- Start date
astronaut
Well-known member
*sigh* after reading some of the posts, all I can say is ...
It was kind of depressing, but this is making me not feel so bad about my makeup addiction. It doesn't help me to save money, but at least I won't end up in jail... I know that the OP and her boyfriend are in an "unfortunate" situation and it's probably messed up that I'm feeling better about myself from it. I made a careful list of items that I was going to buy during my next visit to MAC. I refrained from getting some items that I still really wanted and I think I'll just go ahead and treat myself to them because I should reward myself since it's better than drugs
Sorry I'm useless to this post, but I just felt like I had to say something.
It was kind of depressing, but this is making me not feel so bad about my makeup addiction. It doesn't help me to save money, but at least I won't end up in jail... I know that the OP and her boyfriend are in an "unfortunate" situation and it's probably messed up that I'm feeling better about myself from it. I made a careful list of items that I was going to buy during my next visit to MAC. I refrained from getting some items that I still really wanted and I think I'll just go ahead and treat myself to them because I should reward myself since it's better than drugs
Sorry I'm useless to this post, but I just felt like I had to say something.
xxsgtigressxx
Well-known member
Ok...here's my opinion on everything said thus far...
On your defensiveness...you cant ask for advice if you only are going to listen to what you want to hear. It doesnt mean people are closed-minded. They have a right to their own opinion, and dont dish it out if you cant take it.
On your bf... No, I doubt he's a bad guy. I know people make stupid mistakes, and some people can change. Most cannot,but some can.
On pot: I am not a pot smoker. However, I think it should be legalized. I dont think its a gateway drug, I think those who venture off into other drugs just have that in their personality. I dont think pot is bad for you, ive never even heard of anyone dying of a marijuana overdose. Many many many successful people smoke weed everyday. Its a lifestyle I suppose. As long as you are able to be a contributing citizen, you should be able to smoke pot.
On your relationship: I know I know, you feel like you've never thought about anyone the way you do about your bf. You're in love. Dont make the mistake in thinking that your love will never end. Thats what I thought when I was 18. Im turning 23, and already I am a 100% completely different person than I was when I was 18. These are the years when people change the most. Its your choice, and its your life, and maybe (hopefully) its different for you, but there is a reason why 99% of the population is completely against the idea of an 18 year old even thinking about getting engaged! My mom was 19 when she got married, but really, that was a different generation. Divorce rates are so high for my parents generation, im pretty sure there is a link between getting married too young and divorce. If your love is that strong, then there is no reason not to wait until you mature into a woman. Face it, you're still a kid. I know the legal adult age is 18, but that is not what makes you an adult. Like I said, Im turning 23 shortly, and im only 78 % adult. I pay my own bills, I live on my own with my bf, etc. But I still have that part of me that still wants to party, still runs to my mom when I feel sick, etc. Me and my bf have such a strong relationship, we've been together for 3 1/2 years, and you wont see an engagement ring on my finger. I dont need that for our relationship to feel valid at this point in my life, there is no rush.
On money: Please please please do not shell out your own money for your bf to have a lawyer. This is his thing, and God forbid one day you guys break up, you will look back at that and wonder what the hell you were thinking. you werent the one who got arrested. I still look back at my ex's that I was so in love with at the time and wonder why I did certain things for them. Especially if he doesnt pay you back, there is truth to the saying that money ruins friendships. Same applies to relationships. Doesn't your bf have a family? They can take care of it, and if his only other option is a court appointed attorney then so be it. He is guilty, afterall. No lawyer can erase that he in fact is guilty. They can sometimes make it that the court cannot prove that he's guilty, but even with a good lawyer that is not promised.
I am not being closed minded by the way. My bf got a ticket for smoking a cigarette on the wrong train platform, and was arrested after he didn't pay the ticket. It was awful. Did I spend a dime of my own money to get him out? no. And you bet your ass he was in trouble for a very long time, not because he's a bad person but because he was so STUPID for neglecting such an important thing. So I know, I've been there. Our relationship survived it because people do stupid things. That doesnt make them stupid. But he dealt with the whole situation himself,showed up to his court hearings, and when he could not attend, he called ahead and re-scheduled them. Sometimes ignorance isnt bliss, you cant bury your head under the sand and hide from your problems till they go away. Im sure he was scared to go to court, and maybe thats why he avoided it. Unfortunately, this never will work out in your favor.
Im not saying to dump him. Im saying to be smart, and always remember what happened. Im saying dont get involved even though you are head over heels in love with him. Dont give him money, dont feel that you have to get engaged, love changes. Im sure Britney Spears never thought her marraige to Kevin Federline would ever end which is why she didnt want to draw up a pre-nup. Look at what happened. You're not the only one in the world who has been so in love that they thought nothing would ever change, and a lot of people are paying for it.
All in all, good luck and I hope it works out for you, its just that unfortunately with age comes a lot of hard learned lessons and wisdom. r
On your defensiveness...you cant ask for advice if you only are going to listen to what you want to hear. It doesnt mean people are closed-minded. They have a right to their own opinion, and dont dish it out if you cant take it.
On your bf... No, I doubt he's a bad guy. I know people make stupid mistakes, and some people can change. Most cannot,but some can.
On pot: I am not a pot smoker. However, I think it should be legalized. I dont think its a gateway drug, I think those who venture off into other drugs just have that in their personality. I dont think pot is bad for you, ive never even heard of anyone dying of a marijuana overdose. Many many many successful people smoke weed everyday. Its a lifestyle I suppose. As long as you are able to be a contributing citizen, you should be able to smoke pot.
On your relationship: I know I know, you feel like you've never thought about anyone the way you do about your bf. You're in love. Dont make the mistake in thinking that your love will never end. Thats what I thought when I was 18. Im turning 23, and already I am a 100% completely different person than I was when I was 18. These are the years when people change the most. Its your choice, and its your life, and maybe (hopefully) its different for you, but there is a reason why 99% of the population is completely against the idea of an 18 year old even thinking about getting engaged! My mom was 19 when she got married, but really, that was a different generation. Divorce rates are so high for my parents generation, im pretty sure there is a link between getting married too young and divorce. If your love is that strong, then there is no reason not to wait until you mature into a woman. Face it, you're still a kid. I know the legal adult age is 18, but that is not what makes you an adult. Like I said, Im turning 23 shortly, and im only 78 % adult. I pay my own bills, I live on my own with my bf, etc. But I still have that part of me that still wants to party, still runs to my mom when I feel sick, etc. Me and my bf have such a strong relationship, we've been together for 3 1/2 years, and you wont see an engagement ring on my finger. I dont need that for our relationship to feel valid at this point in my life, there is no rush.
On money: Please please please do not shell out your own money for your bf to have a lawyer. This is his thing, and God forbid one day you guys break up, you will look back at that and wonder what the hell you were thinking. you werent the one who got arrested. I still look back at my ex's that I was so in love with at the time and wonder why I did certain things for them. Especially if he doesnt pay you back, there is truth to the saying that money ruins friendships. Same applies to relationships. Doesn't your bf have a family? They can take care of it, and if his only other option is a court appointed attorney then so be it. He is guilty, afterall. No lawyer can erase that he in fact is guilty. They can sometimes make it that the court cannot prove that he's guilty, but even with a good lawyer that is not promised.
I am not being closed minded by the way. My bf got a ticket for smoking a cigarette on the wrong train platform, and was arrested after he didn't pay the ticket. It was awful. Did I spend a dime of my own money to get him out? no. And you bet your ass he was in trouble for a very long time, not because he's a bad person but because he was so STUPID for neglecting such an important thing. So I know, I've been there. Our relationship survived it because people do stupid things. That doesnt make them stupid. But he dealt with the whole situation himself,showed up to his court hearings, and when he could not attend, he called ahead and re-scheduled them. Sometimes ignorance isnt bliss, you cant bury your head under the sand and hide from your problems till they go away. Im sure he was scared to go to court, and maybe thats why he avoided it. Unfortunately, this never will work out in your favor.
Im not saying to dump him. Im saying to be smart, and always remember what happened. Im saying dont get involved even though you are head over heels in love with him. Dont give him money, dont feel that you have to get engaged, love changes. Im sure Britney Spears never thought her marraige to Kevin Federline would ever end which is why she didnt want to draw up a pre-nup. Look at what happened. You're not the only one in the world who has been so in love that they thought nothing would ever change, and a lot of people are paying for it.
All in all, good luck and I hope it works out for you, its just that unfortunately with age comes a lot of hard learned lessons and wisdom. r
